Im Finally Asking for Help

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I know now that the only way to succeed is to swallow pride and get the help you need. I am exhausted with this depression and rest to fight back. I am asking for support. I know you guys dont know me and probably don't care that much, but I feel that I need to at least reach out for help.
This goes beyond eating. I've stopped working out and started smoking again to numb my emotions. I want to stop coping that way. I want to push myself. But I think I'm afraid to. I keep hiding in my comfortable little hole and making excuses for myself. I'm tired of my life falling apart because I keep losing motivation. How do you keep at it? Even when your head gets foggy and your body slows down? What are some small steps I can take to get out of this?

Clean the house? Drink green tea and relax? Write lists of things to do? How do I stop backsliding?
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  • berniemay
    berniemay Posts: 78 Member
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    I've been there. Please talk to your doctor. I have dealt with depression since my youngest son was born 16 1/2 years ago. I have taken an antidepressant since that time - with a few breaks here and there. I just can't maintain any sense of chemical balance without them. Exercising has definitely helped, and I also saw a counselor for a brief time. I will keep you in my prayers!
  • Axels91
    Axels91 Posts: 213
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    I've been there. Please talk to your doctor. I have dealt with depression since my youngest son was born 16 1/2 years ago. I have taken an antidepressant since that time - with a few breaks here and there. I just can't maintain any sense of chemical balance without them. Exercising has definitely helped, and I also saw a counselor for a brief time. I will keep you in my prayers!
    Thanks so much. I think with this Internet age we all lose touch. There's no sense of community and we are so detached. It's hard to ask for help when you don't think people give a damn. I have hope again. I am going to pray. I haven't done so in a long time and this may be Gods way of telling me to listen up.
  • silhouettes
    silhouettes Posts: 517 Member
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    I like to make lists, although I barely follow them... they motivate me to try. Like I made a list to only eat so many calories at lunch no matter what.. although I always go over what I wrote down, I find myself TRYING to limit it now, so that's a start!
  • NicolettetheGreek
    NicolettetheGreek Posts: 246 Member
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    Hi..you need help? Super Man to the rescue!! No, not making fun of your situation, have chronic depression myself. Get yourself to the doctor's who can put you on a medication, hopefully short-term. Then, make me a friend, pls read profile.
    I have found my friends on here have really responded to me when I was down. Also, adding in a little more exercise boosts the endorphin's (feel good chemical's in brain).
  • gigishiree
    gigishiree Posts: 62 Member
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    i agree with the above posters. Def keep eating and try to keep active. Occupy your mind with small daily goals - each small step counts. Dont ever think no one cares bc im sure there are many people in your life who love you-they may just not recognize your pain. And i care bc Ive been there: smoking, binge eating, starvation and worse....Its hard but do what you have to do to get thru it whether its meds or counseling. feel free to message me.
  • AZackery
    AZackery Posts: 2,035 Member
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    Communicating with God is always good. Make small goals and take one step at a time to reach it. Baby steps and patience is the key. Don't compare yourself to anyone. Keep your eyes on yourself. Find exercises that you like doing and do them. Take rest days. If you aren't in the mood to workout, don't workout. Eat healthy, but don't deprive yourself of anything that you like to eat, unless it's something the door told you that you can't have for health reasons. Drink plenty of water. Get enough rest. Fight depression. You may get depressed, but it doesn't mean that depression has to have you. Always love yourself. Don't put yourself down.

    You can do this. I'm here for you. I'm a health cheerleader. I love motivating and encouraging other people. I may not give you a word of encouragement everyday, but you would get a encouraging word from me.
  • prism6
    prism6 Posts: 484 Member
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    Been there and still do go there at times. I know I am not as focused as I was at the start,I am not sure why,probably the attention I get now. Soemtimes anonimity is a great place to be. It is hard to reach out to others,when I finally did I made a horrible mess of things,but here on this site there are so many people at the exact spot you are. It is amazing really. I wish you well,know that there will be good days and bad days. Summer is at hand and walks along streams and beaches or laying in the grass looking at the clouds is a great stress reliever.
  • Axels91
    Axels91 Posts: 213
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    Thanks everyone, Im in tears and I'm so grateful that you guys responded. Depression is a monster that is so hard to pry off your back. I'm so thankful that you responded. I will make some tea and go read a scripture. And I see a psychiatrist may 7 so will definitely be getting help.
  • ShawnDMuth
    ShawnDMuth Posts: 270 Member
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    Maybe try reprogramming your mind. Start each day with writing down 10 things in your life you are grateful for and why. After you write them, go back and read them followed by thank you, thank you and thank you. If your brain can spend more time thinking of what is going right, it creates more to feel good about.
  • sstamper71
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    Hi!!
    I have no big methods to help only one... Im not here to pressure you about God or anything but I do know one thing the Word of God works.. There is a scripture in the Bible that says, "God had not given us a spirit of fear, but power, love and a sound mind."
    I found out that when you get up every morning even if you dont feel like ,it start speaking "I have a sound mind, Im healthy and whole in my mind and emotions.. In Jesus name".. God will help you and I will be praying for you!!
  • kr3851
    kr3851 Posts: 994 Member
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    My advice? Break everything into bite-size pieces. Not food, but tasks...

    eg 'I have to go work out for an hour' is a big thing. Try 'I will go for a walk around the block and see how I feel' is much smaller, there is no pressure to go burn 1000 calories or stay on a treadmill for an hour. If you find that you walk around the block 6 times... that's great! And if you walk around the block once and don't feel any better, well, at least you walked around the block once.

    Same goes with food. Plan out your meals for the next day the night before. If you stick to the plan, well done. If you deviate form the plan, try to figure out why you did, and try to do things differently tomorrow.
  • Axels91
    Axels91 Posts: 213
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    Thanks, I made a basket full of affirmations and scriptures I will choose from every day. I think that if I wake up with the Holy Spirit then that will determine how the day goes. I can never stick to meal plans, I always try to cut too much food out or skip meals:(

    So I just made a rule that I must eat 5 times a day.
  • AbsoluteNG
    AbsoluteNG Posts: 1,079 Member
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    Take omega 3 fish oil.
  • kurenaikumo
    kurenaikumo Posts: 271 Member
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    I like to paint (canvas, not walls LOL). It's a good way to express/get out what you're thinking/feeling and kind of forget the world for a while. It's calming.

    I've been there, it does get better.
  • pinkraynedropjacki
    pinkraynedropjacki Posts: 3,027 Member
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    I am like you, I suffer from depression and it really stops me from doing so much. If I let it. I try not to.

    I had a fight with my husband 2 days ago. Was that bad that I would rather have been dead than walk back into the house. I've never been that bad before. Took me 30 mins at least to get near the front door. Then, cause hubby went out, I decided to do a workout. Thinking it may help just get my mind off everything. It worked.

    I use working out as my "drug" to get things back to where I want them to be, not where they are. Go for a walk, run, swim... hell try Zumba like I do. That way I can tune out of all my problems till I just forget about them.... even if it's for 40 mins.
  • pippiagain
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    I love that you are looking to the scriptures for help...prayer helps, also. Try a little bit of exercise each day-that releases the "feel good" hormones, and is much better than meds. Although, meds do have a place for some people. Reach out when needed-we all need to sometimes, and knowing someone cares is a big help! I am amazed at how caring many of the folks here are! Do not skip meals or cut back too much--baby steps. Choose one small goal to work on for the week, and then get that under control before choosing another goal. Are you keeping a food diary? That is probably the single most important thing you can do here. Best of luck, keep us posted!
  • kaitimae
    kaitimae Posts: 727 Member
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    Just wanted to reply that this is something I deal constantly with as well. I will echo what others have said - see a doctor and maybe a counselor! I feel so much better when I am on my meds (Wellbutrin). They don't make my depression go away so much as they enable me to DEAL with it better. I have more energy, which helps me get to the gym on a regular basis and work out. (Which also makes me feel better because hey, endorphins!) They help me to stay on track with my eating as well, for the most part. I still have bad days... but they aren't nearly as bad as they are when I'm not consistent with my meds. Seeing a counselor has also been a HUGE help for me.

    If you want another friend who is going through the same kind of stuff, definitely feel free to send me a friend request! Depression sucks... but you are NOT alone in this. =)
  • ChasingSweatandTears
    ChasingSweatandTears Posts: 504 Member
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    PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do me a favor, and BEFORE you start on a prescription med ask your doctor to test your B-12 and Vitamin D levels. I only say this from LIFE CHANGING personal experience. If you suffer from depression/anxiety/fatigue and you have insurance these two nutritional tests will most likely be covered and even if they aren't they are SOOOO worth having done.

    Here's my story:
    I was on one different antidepressant after another for TWELVE years. I was drained, had no motivation to do much of anything, cried a LOT, and could literally sleep away an entire day on the weekends. I never wanted to attend functions I was invited to because I was so damn tired and drained and depressed. This led to a vicious cycle where I would be mad at myself for being so unproductive, I would eat sugary crap or comfort food, etc... I'm really lucky I didn't balloon worse than I did, but I balanced out my binges with healthy eating :/ Depression actually runs in my family so I assumed I inherited it. I also assumed in the beginning that my Doctor would know and reccomend the best course of action. One by one, the meds all boosted my spririts and energy initially and then I fizzled back out again. The Dr always wanted to up my dose at that point but something just didn't seem right. I experienced emotions that I've never felt before, RAGE for one while being on one, extreme spaciness and even more lethargy when on others, nightmares on zoloft... the list goes on :/
    It was awful. The meds never really helped me be my best self, they actually made things worse in some cases. The best cases were where they had no effect at all, or when I took an NSRI vs and SSRI and felt like I could do anything..... for awhile.

    A couple of years ago, I went to work for a neurology clinic who treated depression and nervous system disorders among other things. I talked to one of the Doctors there about my symptoms and he immediately tested for B12 and vitamin D levels. I was deficient by his standards in both nutrients, despite having a mostly very healthy diet! I mean I was eating organic, fresh, healthy foods, not restricting any food groups at the time. Lab reference ranges vary, but even by my GP's ranges I was low and by my neurologists ranges I was deficient. So the doctor prescribed b12 injections and vitamin d over the counter. 6,000 ius a day for 2 months and then 2,000 ius a day every day thereafter.

    Within 6 months I felt like a new person. And for more than 2 years now I have not taken a single anti depressant. I still have some issues, we all do. But nothing that keeps me down like it used to. I CAN'T take naps anymore unless I am truly depleted and I get to ENJOY my weekends now instead of sleeping them away :) I don't know how to explain how happy that makes me. Everything's just kinda balanced out. I think more clearly, I cry less, I live more. I have even energy instead of constant mood/energy swings. It's amazing really and pisses me off that I wasted 12 years of my life to prescription drugs feeling unnecessarily like crap all of the time.

    Now I am not saying vitamins can fix everything. And I'm not saying don't seek advice or professional help, only you truly know if you need it. And I'm not saying people taking antipdepressants shouldn't be taking them, everyone and every situation is different. But I would reccomend to ANYONE suffering from depression, anxiety and fatigue to have nutritional level testing done!!! I can't advocate it enough. It changed my life. It CAN'T hurt and especially these two nutrients play a key role in nervous system health and hormonal regulation. And I don't know what your diet is like, but sugar.... well sugar is the devil and effed me up for a long time emotionally! Ugh! I only have it on occasion now, but I used to have something sweet several times a week and I'm convinced that also contributed to my depression.

    I know this is long, but when I see someone expressing the same thing I used to live, it really weighs on my heart the unnecessary burdens I carried for so long. I just want everyone to research and seek out additional information and realize that sometimes these things are a way of our bodies telling us that something's not right, not necessarily in our brain to begin with, but our brain and nervous system may not be getting the right kind of support they need to function at their best.

    Feel free to message me if you have ANY questions
  • bellyupgmc
    bellyupgmc Posts: 1 Member
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    Wow what wonderful responses from everyone. I have also had depression. Some I have inherited it from my mom and the other is from life's mishaps. I agree with all the rest on God and scriptures. He makes us stronger from the trials we go through. One time in my life I was going to kill myself. I became a Christian and he gave me strength to get through life and I am so glad. If I could have seen then, my life now, I would have been looking forward to it. I thank God he came into my life then and he has made me so much stronger. I still have depression at times so I exercise, take Bee Royal Jelly (high in Vit. B's), I eat a lot of Salmon (helps with depression), and I hand it over to God. Look on the internet on food that will help depression like Vit. B, and Salmon. This too shall pass.
  • antoniosmooth
    antoniosmooth Posts: 299 Member
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    Wow what wonderful responses from everyone. I have also had depression. Some I have inherited it from my mom and the other is from life's mishaps. I agree with all the rest on God and scriptures. He makes us stronger from the trials we go through. One time in my life I was going to kill myself. I became a Christian and he gave me strength to get through life and I am so glad. If I could have seen then, my life now, I would have been looking forward to it. I thank God he came into my life then and he has made me so much stronger. I still have depression at times so I exercise, take Bee Royal Jelly (high in Vit. B's), I eat a lot of Salmon (helps with depression), and I hand it over to God. Look on the internet on food that will help depression like Vit. B, and Salmon. This too shall pass.

    At times, although not often I batte with depression and simple general insecurity. Thank you for your post. You reminded me I need to give it all up to The Lord.