OMG!!! What have I let myself become??

kslager77
kslager77 Posts: 51 Member
edited December 18 in Introduce Yourself
Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought "OMG!!!! Have I ever gotten FAT!!!". I did today and I have no idea where to start or what to do. My mom bought me a skirt yesterday. When she was giving it to me, she said "It’s a 22, I don’t know if it will fit, but try it". I kind of feel defeated with comments like that. Now, I am sure she didn’t mean anything by it, but still…

I understand the basic, burn more calories than what you take in. I know that veggies are the way to go. I also know that I cannot afford to buy a lot of fresh stuff every week. I am on my own with my son. By the time I pay the mortgage, car payment, monthly bills, etc, there’s not a left over to buy the healthy stuff. I am also working 10 hour days so by the time I get home, get supper made, clean up and help my son with homework, I am tired! I know that I need to get active, I just don’t know how to get myself in gear. My parents have an elliptical in their basement (only about a block away), but even getting there to do that is a huge undertaking.

I cannot log in to MFP at work and we don’t get cell service, so I can’t use my phone. I bought a calorie counter book to try to help, but I feel confused and lost when it comes to starting. Every time you turn around, someone is telling you to do something different.

I guess what I really need is support and help. Please feel free to add me if you think you can help. I know I will do my best to help support you.
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Replies

  • You can do it and this is the first step good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • LPS1986
    LPS1986 Posts: 104
    Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought "OMG!!!! Have I ever gotten FAT!!!". I did today and I have no idea where to start or what to do. My mom bought me a skirt yesterday. When she was giving it to me, she said "It’s a 22, I don’t know if it will fit, but try it". I kind of feel defeated with comments like that. Now, I am sure she didn’t mean anything by it, but still…

    I understand the basic, burn more calories than what you take in. I know that veggies are the way to go. I also know that I cannot afford to buy a lot of fresh stuff every week. I am on my own with my son. By the time I pay the mortgage, car payment, monthly bills, etc, there’s not a left over to buy the healthy stuff. I am also working 10 hour days so by the time I get home, get supper made, clean up and help my son with homework, I am tired! I know that I need to get active, I just don’t know how to get myself in gear. My parents have an elliptical in their basement (only about a block away), but even getting there to do that is a huge undertaking.

    I cannot log in to MFP at work and we don’t get cell service, so I can’t use my phone. I bought a calorie counter book to try to help, but I feel confused and lost when it comes to starting. Every time you turn around, someone is telling you to do something different.

    I guess what I really need is support and help. Please feel free to add me if you think you can help. I know I will do my best to help support you.

    I try to plan my days out ahead of time. So, every morning (or the night before), I log in and plan my meals for the next day. I remember my plans when I am at work and stick to it!
  • susannamarie
    susannamarie Posts: 2,148 Member
    Plan your food for the day in advance, and start packing a lunch if you can.

    Frozen vegetables are just fine as well and don't go off like fresh ones.

    Best wishes.
  • dswood
    dswood Posts: 12
    A good trick to try is to leave something on your plate at each meal. It really adds up. A good book is "Eat this, not that" because it will also give you good tips.
    Also, drink a lot of water and give up soda and artificial sweetener. Both are bad for your body, and the sodas have so many calories.
    Good luck to you. I have been there many times. :)
  • Switty_Kitty
    Switty_Kitty Posts: 532 Member
    We are the same age, both single moms.....and we can do this!!! Once you get started, its gets easier :) Best of luck! Add me if you'd like!
  • sarafil
    sarafil Posts: 506 Member
    Welcome! I know it can seem overwhelming, but you took the first step, and that is important. It may seem like you have a lot stacked against you in terms of barriers to weight loss, but you have to change your mind set. It is going to be hard, especially in the beginning, but if you are serious about making a life change and getting in shape, you can't make excuses. When I was a single mom working a full time job, I had to get up at 4 am to exercise. And at first, it really really sucked! But then slowly I realized how much more energy I had when I worked out, and how I was starting to look forward to working out....and getting up, so I could have some "me" time. In terms of food to buy, I totally understand being on a tight budget. But a lot of times, if you really look at what you are buying, you can change things up so you can buy fresh stuff and not have it affect your budget. And really, if you can't buy fresh veggies, canned will do the trick. It's just about making smarter food choices, and not all "smart" food choices are expensive ones. That is great that you have access to a treadmill, and it's only a block away...you just have to make the decision that you are going to use it, and then follow through. Or if you can't get over there to use the elliptical, go to your local library and check out some exercise dvds and use them at home. If you can walk on your lunch break from work, do it. It's small steps, really. If you feel overwhelmed, just commit to doing a few changes now. I promise once you start to see results, you will be hooked. But it is a LIFE change, and you have to be ready and open to making it. Good luck!!!
  • Tori_356
    Tori_356 Posts: 510 Member
    first of all you need to go into it with a POSITIVE ATTITUDE.
  • Dwamma
    Dwamma Posts: 289 Member
    I can relate to your post! But this was a good frist step! Something that helps me is I pack my lunch bag and log my food the night before.....that helps me see where I am at and what I really want to eat or need to eat. I know you can do this! You are worth it!
    Remember! "All things are possible with Jesus by your side!"
    Add me if you would like.

    Blessings!! <><
  • LaurasClimb
    LaurasClimb Posts: 211 Member
    Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought "OMG!!!! Have I ever gotten FAT!!!". I did today and I have no idea where to start or what to do. My mom bought me a skirt yesterday. When she was giving it to me, she said "It’s a 22, I don’t know if it will fit, but try it". I kind of feel defeated with comments like that. Now, I am sure she didn’t mean anything by it, but still…

    I understand the basic, burn more calories than what you take in. I know that veggies are the way to go. I also know that I cannot afford to buy a lot of fresh stuff every week. I am on my own with my son. By the time I pay the mortgage, car payment, monthly bills, etc, there’s not a left over to buy the healthy stuff. I am also working 10 hour days so by the time I get home, get supper made, clean up and help my son with homework, I am tired! I know that I need to get active, I just don’t know how to get myself in gear. My parents have an elliptical in their basement (only about a block away), but even getting there to do that is a huge undertaking.

    I cannot log in to MFP at work and we don’t get cell service, so I can’t use my phone. I bought a calorie counter book to try to help, but I feel confused and lost when it comes to starting. Every time you turn around, someone is telling you to do something different.

    I guess what I really need is support and help. Please feel free to add me if you think you can help. I know I will do my best to help support you.

    I hear ya! It's tough being a single mom. I think the biggest thing you can do is commit to doing SOMETHING! Just paying attention and thinking about what you are eating helps. I assume you pack your lunch for work so logging your food before or after work should work for you. Small steps. Some people cut out/cut back soda or other vices to begin with.

    Get yourself a team of "cheerleaders." People who will encourage and support you and be sure to do the same for them. And don't be afraid to "unfriend" people if they are unsupportive or just don't hold the same values/beliefs as you. Your circle of friends on here can really contribute to your success. Go ahead and send me a request if you need someone.
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
    We are here for you! Good luck and we are rooting for you to do this!!!
  • illiquod
    illiquod Posts: 23
    Basically the same thing happened to me... well, except it was men's clothing. My wife is a high school teacher and we go to prom every year. I went to put on some of my good dress pants and... well... they didn't even come close to fitting. They were bought 8 months ago. I had to buy new pants that were three sizes larger. I had gained that much in 8 months.

    That was all the eye-opener I needed to get started. So far I've lost 7 pounds. It can be done. Just don't give up or give in to the things that you used to do. You have to change your ways. At least, I did. No excuses, no justifications... and for me, no "I lost x lbs., I can reward myself with fast food" mindsets.
  • absmom85
    absmom85 Posts: 5
    I know the feeling, I looked in the mirror one day and said to myself 'How could you let yourself get so heavy?' Then I stopped and realized I was setting a terrible example for my daughter about how to be healthy. So I did what everyone else said, I planned in advance, I'm just restarting my diet, but I made a list of good things with variety I could eat for meals and then went to the store to stock up. Give yourself options and don't be afraid to try something new. I have been at this a week now, and I might not have lost any real pounds yet, but I can tell you, I do feel the difference. I feel better, less bloated, less just yuk. Stick with it, you have support here, and trust me, after the first week or so, it becomes second nature. :)
  • I said the same thing October 2010. Now I am 91 lbs lighter and 6 sizes smaller! Keep this tucked away so when you are feeling low you can look at this and remind yourself why you started.
  • pinuplove
    pinuplove Posts: 12,871 Member
    It sounds like you have a lot going on! Start small...add a quick walk at lunch, make healthier choices, etc. I too couldn't believe what I had become, but it feels so good to be taking back control and getting healthier! The small changes add up, and eventually become bigger changes, until it is a new routine. You can do this!
  • Toridactyl
    Toridactyl Posts: 19 Member
    You've listed a lot of things that you *can't* do.

    What are some things you think you *can*?

    No one can give you motivation, will-power, etc. You have to want it for you first and foremost.

    You have to know you CAN achieve your goals. Start small. Stop the self-loathing. Say yes to things.

    As a former "this 22 is a bit tight" girl myself, I have been there and am still working everyday to allow myself to become happy and healthy.
  • chicpeach
    chicpeach Posts: 302 Member
    You are not alone. My husband is in construction and I'm an interior designer. As you can imagine, this economy is still devastating to our finances. I've learned to shop smarter. I do my grocery shopping at Walmart and buy a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables each week. What I don't buy is non-nutritious junk. I don't spend money on bottled salad dressings, hamburger helper and other crap. I make my own salad dressing and help my hamburger with fresh veggies hidden in the meatloaf. My kids have adapted. I explained they were getting fresh fruit, not pop tarts. I'm getting healthy and like or not, they are along for the ride. Your son will be on your side. Trust me, he wants you to live long and be healthy and will deal with the fresh fruit and veggies. Give him a chance.
  • TheDoctorDana
    TheDoctorDana Posts: 595 Member
    You can do it :) You are not alone! We are all here for weight issues. lol Feel free to add me ;)
  • BeccaLevine
    BeccaLevine Posts: 315 Member
    I know you have a busy life, but most of us do. Being healthy is a lifestyle, not a chore. I am a 21 year old living on my own, paying all of my bills (including a car payment), and I MAKE a way to afford a gym membership and a personal trainer, as well as buy healthy groceries. You have to get creative, and buy things at the store that go together to make different meals. It can be done. Go to google and type in "undressed skeleton" and read her blog. She has a meal plan in there that give you a grocery list that can feed you for a week for about $30. Don't make excuses, you can do this! I am happy to help encourage and support you if you wish to add me! :happy:
  • candicemaechling
    candicemaechling Posts: 152 Member
    You've made a good first step! You can do this :) my go tos for food on a budget froozen veggies next best thing to fresh and I buy bulk chicken breast you can catch it on sale or the Walmart locations in my area and sometimes kroger have 1.99 or less a pound at the begging of the week ill cook my chicken in the crockpot and use it throughout the week ex. Wed was chicken fajitas Thursday was chickenwith bbq sauce and tonight I made buffalo pizza. I also do the froozen tilapia fillets you can get a big bag for a good rate and its a quick defrost under cold water. I recently started using grape seed oil for stir frys with those above mentioned froozen veggies and just experiment on what is cheaper to male from scratch and to buy. As far as exercise start small the more you get in the habbit of the easier it will be and less your feet will hurt you will feel more energized with better food and exercise. Good luck :)
  • kslager77
    kslager77 Posts: 51 Member
    Wow! I am so grateful for the feedback and support! =) I am taking everything that everyone said and making a list. I am going to start small and go from there. I am in a better mindset than I was about an hour ago. I know I am the ONLY one who can do this, but the support is a huge help! My son is getting a trampoline tomorrow, so maybe I will try to get on it and not kill myself. :p
    Thanks to all of you!!!
  • cressievargo
    cressievargo Posts: 392 Member
    You can do this. Small steps can lead to big changes.

    First - food budget - fresh veggies IN season / on sale aren't too bad $$ wise. If still not in your range - go frozen!! (Avoid canned - hidden sodium and they don't taste as good.) Frozen fruits & veggies are often BETTER if you are buying something that is out of season in your area, because the "Fresh" stuff is picked before it's fully ripened. Also - buy things that you can incorporate into more than one meal per week. Menu planning / prepping on your days off can save time during the work week.

    Secondly - There is this idea that you have to work out for an hour a day for results. Not necessarily true. Got ten minutes? Take a quick walk (and you will often find it re-energizes you!). Do stretches or calf raises while waiting in line at the grocery store. Quick, simple stuff like that.

    Try to cut out say - one thing a week. ..soda, chips, whatever. Also - don't keep it in the house to tempt you. Your child doesn't need that crap, either. I don't buy chips, I don't buy fruit snacks, none of that stuff - and I have three boys - and they know when they do get it, it's a special treat.

    You CAN do it - but you have to go into it with the right (POSITIVE) attitude. Take it one day at a time..and before you know it, it will be easier...

    Oh - and I don't know where you are from, but try to check out local farmer's markets. They often have much better pricing (and better quality) than a supermarket.
  • christenwypy
    christenwypy Posts: 336 Member
    I can help you a little.

    If you have an exercise DVD or Netflix you can do that to work out. There are also free workouts on Youtube and on the fitness magazine site (you have to regsiter with the site but it is free). You can also start walking with your son.. Try getting up an hour or a half hour early and do one of those just three times a week to start. Also you can just get up extra early one day and then use the two weekend days. Eventually you will want to increase to fve days for an hour but for now start at 3 days for 30 minutes.

    As far as price, personally I find this to be a myth. Since we are eating healthy I spend the same as before. Produce is not really very expensive. For the protein I get eggs, tuna which is cheap, and chicken which is also cheap. I will buy whatever kind of chicken is on sale for .99 or 1.99 a lb, be it a whole chicken, breasts, thighs, whatever. Sometimes we cook a whole turkey too and it lasts us a whole week. Without buying red meat, processed foods, soda, etc- we SAVE money so then if I spend a little more on healthy, organic stuff it just balances out and the total bill stays about the same.

    You have to want to do it more than you don't. I know a lot of times I really did not want this and I made a half hearted attempt. I felt other things were more important like work, house cleaning, etc. Changing your lifestule is BIG, and it is not easy at first. But after a week or two it is easy and even enjoyable. You start to feel confident, healthy, strong, and important. You start to feel like yourSELF again, you feel whole. You also have more energy. And after the first week or two, after all that sugar and other chemicals leave your body you just feel so great and are more focused. You are less tired then and more productive.

    As far as eating- I am probably not ideal but in this first phase that I am in I mainly eat- egg whites, protein bars and/or shakes, raw baby spinach and/or salad with proteiin thrown in, some fruit, trail mix for snack when I get hungry, brown rice which I put salsa and other sauted veggies in. I also have been sneaking in a square or two of organic dark chocolate every other night or so.

    As far as logging- write down everythig you eat and then log later on when you come home. Or decide on everything you will eat the next day for breakfast, morning snack, lunch, afternoon snack, and dinner and log it the day before. make changes later on if necessary.

    You can do this. Good luck!
  • illiquod
    illiquod Posts: 23
    I said the same thing October 2010. Now I am 91 lbs lighter and 6 sizes smaller! Keep this tucked away so when you are feeling low you can look at this and remind yourself why you started.

    Wow! Your journey is incredible! Your photos of before and after... wow. Legendary. Keep posting; you'll be an inspiration to everyone!
  • I think I really realized that I needed to shape up my lifestyle when I saw photos of myself from family events. I've been very good at purposely avoiding looking in the mirror, but the photos caught me off-guard. I mean, we can work at changing how we look in a mirror, but those photos can't be changed (except with photoshop, muahaha :laugh: ).

    I understand exactly how confused you feel. There's so much conflicting information. I could spend all day reading posts about, for example, bananas. There was one thread that went on for 4 pages about how/when/if you should eat bananas. People are bringing in all sorts of studies and sources and going into detail with the physiology involved, and AAAH. But in that thread, there were people from both sides of the argument who seemed to be successful in their fitness/weight loss goals. So I think that tiny details like that won't make or break your progress. I think it's important to keep all of the views in mind, but don't sweat it; not everything has to be done perfectly, right? Besides, every person is different. The basic idea is, like you said, that you have to burn more calories than you consume.

    I think that the calorie counter book sounds like a good idea if you can't log on immediately.

    About getting yourself into gear: I think it's a mental block more than anything else. I have huge issues with anxiety, and for me the most difficult thing was to drag myself down to the gym (my apartment building has a fitness room). It wasn't very far to go, but it seemed like such an enormous task. It sounds silly, but I just made myself do something to get me closer each day. One day I went down to the lobby, and that was it for me. The next day I got to the door of the fitness room, and that was it. Eventually, I got myself onto an elliptical machine (I'm getting attached to those now, heheh) and just did what I could. The next day I tried again. It took me like a week to actually get down there and get on the machine, but I was happier knowing that I achieved something each day, as small as it was. It's a good confidence boost. If I might add one other thing, I'll mention that even after the first week of doing very little on the machine, I already had a better self-image. That was more motivation for me. I guess you have to get the ball rolling, as it's said.

    rachaellynn91 is right, this is the first step, and you've already done that. You've already got that ball rolling. :smile:

    I don't usually post much on the forums, as you can see (this is my first post, woot).

    I'll add you, if that's okay with you. Anyone else who would like to add me is welcome to, of course.

    p.s. Sorry about this novel of a post!!
  • Byrdsong1920
    Byrdsong1920 Posts: 336 Member
    I can sense your frustration in your post....But just know it's all good and MFP is a great support system!

    I saw another young lady post on here about preparing your meals ahead of time and thats a great idea! This way you can grab and go in the morning. I am in real estate and constantly on the move. I bought a cooler and throw my ziploc bags of snacks and Tupperware meals in there in the morning that I have prepared the nite before; add in there a bottle of frozen water vs. ice(less messy) and I roll out!! I also set out my protein shake mix and blender at nite, so in the morning I just grab, mix and go. Also GNC has meal replacement shakes that are great, just grab out the frige and go. Great balance of minerals and protein and no lactose or soy!

    I find that at the end of the day we make time for people and things we WANT to make time for..includng knuckle head boys/men... the drama homegirl/girlfriend ....or maybe your thing is knitting, working out, church,etc. We just have to decide we are going to do it. Its easier said than done and after years of my uphill battle, SOMETHING finally clicked . Now im making the time to workout and pack my meals, but at the expense of maybe getting to the office later than I want, hanging out w/friends, fewer road trips etc.But something had to give. I was tired of talking about that 2-piece swimsuit that I DIDNT GET INTO AGAIN THIS SUMMER!!

    God made our temples for us to take care of them and be disciples and spread his word and we can only do that if we are well on the inside, out, mentally and spiritually. Just pray and ask God to perhaps bring an accountability partner into your life AND to give you courage and strength. That partner could be someone at work, church, family, etc. MFP has been great,I've gotten 'pen pals' from all over, that we email daily and encourage each other. At the end of each day,I want my calories to show 'under' my goal and not 500+over :) It holds my butt to the fire :) Even playing w/you son outside, this will wear him down for bed and help you burn a few extra calories. I always find that its hard to get to the gym or to workout, but after I'm done...IM ALWAYS GLAD I WENT!!

    You can do it, just take it day by day...meal by meal. Allow a cheat meal once or twice a week. This will give you something to look forward to.

    Even at work parking far from the building, taking the stairs, walk on your lunch break. Just GET UP AND MOVE/SHAKE SOMETHING :) I started salsa dancing on thursdays and I've met tons of new people and its fun, great cardio.

    You give so much to your family, and I'm sure others around you....you owe this to yourself to be a better and healthier you, inside and out.

    But ,just know you are beautiful now!! I just like to say that I'm working on getting FINE---ERRRR!!! :) WORK IT GIRL!!

    Happy journey!
  • Byrdsong1920
    Byrdsong1920 Posts: 336 Member
    I can relate to your post! But this was a good frist step! Something that helps me is I pack my lunch bag and log my food the night before.....that helps me see where I am at and what I really want to eat or need to eat. I know you can do this! You are worth it!
    Remember! "All things are possible with Jesus by your side!"
    Add me if you would like.

    Blessings!! <><

    AMEN!!! GREAT WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT!!
  • Byrdsong1920
    Byrdsong1920 Posts: 336 Member
    I think I really realized that I needed to shape up my lifestyle when I saw photos of myself from family events. I've been very good at purposely avoiding looking in the mirror, but the photos caught me off-guard. I mean, we can work at changing how we look in a mirror, but those photos can't be changed (except with photoshop, muahaha :laugh: ).

    I understand exactly how confused you feel. There's so much conflicting information. I could spend all day reading posts about, for example, bananas. There was one thread that went on for 4 pages about how/when/if you should eat bananas. People are bringing in all sorts of studies and sources and going into detail with the physiology involved, and AAAH. But in that thread, there were people from both sides of the argument who seemed to be successful in their fitness/weight loss goals. So I think that tiny details like that won't make or break your progress. I think it's important to keep all of the views in mind, but don't sweat it; not everything has to be done perfectly, right? Besides, every person is different. The basic idea is, like you said, that you have to burn more calories than you consume.

    I think that the calorie counter book sounds like a good idea if you can't log on immediately.


    rachaellynn91 is right, this is the first step, and you've already done that. You've already got that ball rolling. :smile:

    I don't usually post much on the forums, as you can see (this is my first post, woot).

    I'll add you, if that's okay with you. Anyone else who would like to add me is welcome to, of course.

    p.s. Sorry about this novel of a post!!

    LOL...my post turned into a novel too...I went back to review it and at first I thought"dang, who wrote all of that? oh me!" hehe!!

    thanks for sharing. Love how open everyone is on here! Thats awesome! Keep it up

    ONE DAY AT A TIME!!



    Happy journey!
  • love22step
    love22step Posts: 1,103 Member
    Could you plant a garden? Maybe a container garden or a garden at your parents' home? Good luck! You can find a way to make this work!
  • IdalmisRodriguez
    IdalmisRodriguez Posts: 4 Member
    I don't know how old your son is but if he's old enough to comprehend let him know!!! I know I'd help my mom if she said she wanted to feel healthier- example: You could ask him to remind you of your goals if you're cheating on your diet. :happy: you can so totally do it!!!
  • Silver_Star
    Silver_Star Posts: 1,351 Member
    Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought "OMG!!!! Have I ever gotten FAT!!!". I did today and I have no idea where to start or what to do. My mom bought me a skirt yesterday. When she was giving it to me, she said "It’s a 22, I don’t know if it will fit, but try it". I kind of feel defeated with comments like that. Now, I am sure she didn’t mean anything by it, but still…

    I understand the basic, burn more calories than what you take in. I know that veggies are the way to go. I also know that I cannot afford to buy a lot of fresh stuff every week. I am on my own with my son. By the time I pay the mortgage, car payment, monthly bills, etc, there’s not a left over to buy the healthy stuff. I am also working 10 hour days so by the time I get home, get supper made, clean up and help my son with homework, I am tired! I know that I need to get active, I just don’t know how to get myself in gear. My parents have an elliptical in their basement (only about a block away), but even getting there to do that is a huge undertaking.

    I cannot log in to MFP at work and we don’t get cell service, so I can’t use my phone. I bought a calorie counter book to try to help, but I feel confused and lost when it comes to starting. Every time you turn around, someone is telling you to do something different.

    I guess what I really need is support and help. Please feel free to add me if you think you can help. I know I will do my best to help support you.

    Check out moneysavingmom.com she has so many awesome tips!! i learnt a lot from her
    Read her 31 days to a better grocery budget series. They are all great tips!!
    http://moneysavingmom.com/2010/03/31-days-to-a-better-grocery-budget-stop-making-excuses-and-commit-to-change.html
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