being lonely is not helping my weight loss
hurleycutie142
Posts: 479 Member
ughh its frustrating cause i get into these funks that i think that im going to be alone forever and it makes me eat... anyone else use food as a way of making them feel better?
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Replies
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feel free to add as friend0
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Not in the same situation, and not meaning to sound harsh at all, but don't let 'being lonely' be an excuse.
You'll see on here that weight loss is just as hard (for many people, harder) when you're in a relationship. There are a lot of people who say they'd be doing so much better if they were on their own. Of course, "I can't lose weight because my partner doesn't want to/eats junk in the house" is just an excuse, too.
You're in this for you. Work on getting where you want to be.0 -
Another person can hold you back worse than you think. You've got no one to hold you back, and there's less complications to get in the way of fitness. So, I'm de-bunking your statement, I'm sorry. Wait until you have 2 kids, a spouse, a career, etc.. Then talk about weight loss difficulties.
btw you're beautiful. You'll have no problem meeting guys. Don't settle for someone just for the company either. Be picky as hell and look after yourself first.0 -
Girl be at peace!!!! You don't need a man...You have your WHOLE life for that..Do you! I sure would If I could0
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Don't send out negative thoughts to the universe or the universe will respond negatively ......look on the bright side of everything and focus in the good and not the bad and lastly always be thankful for what you have.
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Yah, I feel you. I will literally feel full, but will eat anyway. sucks. I just try to work out to make up for the extra calories, or wait longer before my next meal - stomach growling. I'm concious of my weight and I'm doing something about it, so I don't feel too bad when this happens.
Add as a friend, I could always use more friends to see my progress! T0 -
i never said that being in a relationship or having kids is much harder to lose weight... i am not comparing my situation to anyone elses... i am doing great losing weight i started on this website at 250 and now at 180 and still going... but with weight loss theres a lot of stuff that goes along with it emotionally... i still feel like and think i still look 250... i was in a relationship when i started losing weight and it wasnt easy i know...0
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Not in the same situation, and not meaning to sound harsh at all, but don't let 'being lonely' be an excuse.
You'll see on here that weight loss is just as hard (for many people, harder) when you're in a relationship. There are a lot of people who say they'd be doing so much better if they were on their own. Of course, "I can't lose weight because my partner doesn't want to/eats junk in the house" is just an excuse, too.
You're in this for you. Work on getting where you want to be.
This. There are plenty of people on these boards who get annoyed because they feel their spouse/family/friends/colleagues are sabotaging their efforts by eating unhealthily. I would personally argue that you shouldn't hold anyone accountable but yourself, so I don't go along with that. However, I will say that having someone in your life does not magically make everything better, it can bring in new problems of its own (and this is coming from someone who's very happy with their partner) to work through. Don't let 'being lonely' be an excuse to eat poorly. You're in a perfect position to actually have complete control over it.0 -
Even though I am married my husband doesn't "diet" with me it gets very difficult since his calorie requirements are much greater than mine. I don't really have any friends so it feels like I am doing this (and most things) on my own, so, I kind of empathize.
Feel free to add me!
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Feel free to add me as a frend
But I think weight loss is hard whether your with someone or not. Its not easy and there have been times on this journey that I have truly struggled. But we pick ourselves back up and we keep going. Make small goals for you to reach if the big one seems so far away. Youll get there I promise but it isnt always easy.0 -
Beautifully put..Your awesome!Don't send out negative thoughts to the universe or the universe will respond negatively ......look on the bright side of everything and focus in the good and not the bad and lastly always be thankful for what you have.0 -
I was in the same situation you were... The best thing I can say that has helped me is to keep going with the weightloss and just keep going. Call your friends, make plans, call friends you haven't seen in a while make plans with them and go out! The more weight you lose the better your confidence will be and you will be happy and confident when you go out. When you have confidence you will attract people! I have friends of all sizes and they have confidence and self esteem and they attract people towards them....
Hope this helps, it's working for me.
fyi, I came out of a marriage and then went into an abusive relationship which shot my self esteem to the floor... it takes a while but you have to pick yourself up and the rest will fall into place.0 -
I used to medicate with food and video games. specifically MMORPGs. I don't anymore. I still play games just not as much as I used to. I still get lonely but I focus on other things. how far I've come, no longer have diabetes. I know eventually I'll find someone. or someone will find me lol.0
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Don't send out negative thoughts to the universe or the universe will respond negatively ......look on the bright side of everything and focus in the good and not the bad and lastly always be thankful for what you have.
lol seriously... this is the last time im going to the boards when im feeling down... i didnt ask for a bash party... i was making a simple statement... losing weight is not allllll about working out and eating right... theres a huge emotional side of it too... i know that most of us on this board have been the big girl/boy that people look past to see the skinny girl... i am in no way trying to lose weight to be skinny to get guys by no means.... but it would be nice to have someone that is positive in my life...0 -
I don't have a boyfriend and haven't done for the last couple of years. I live with a male housemate and he eats all the junk under the sun. Also, I'm unemployed at the moment so spend pretty much every day all day on my own. If I eat junk and do nothing about it then the only person I have to blame is myself. Do I feel lonely...sometimes but I don't comfort eat over it. I get up off my bum and do something.0
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I was in the same situation you were... The best thing I can say that has helped me is to keep going with the weightloss and just keep going. Call your friends, make plans, call friends you haven't seen in a while make plans with them and go out! The more weight you lose the better your confidence will be and you will be happy and confident when you go out. When you have confidence you will attract people! I have friends of all sizes and they have confidence and self esteem and they attract people towards them....
Hope this helps, it's working for me.
fyi, I came out of a marriage and then went into an abusive relationship which shot my self esteem to the floor... it takes a while but you have to pick yourself up and the rest will fall into place.
thank you this helped me a lot... its nice to know that someone else has been in kinda the same situation as me :]0 -
My intention wasn't to bash you and im sorry you took it that way....basically im just saying keep your chin up!0
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Don't send out negative thoughts to the universe or the universe will respond negatively ......look on the bright side of everything and focus in the good and not the bad and lastly always be thankful for what you have.
lol seriously... this is the last time im going to the boards when im feeling down... i didnt ask for a bash party... i was making a simple statement... losing weight is not allllll about working out and eating right... theres a huge emotional side of it too... i know that most of us on this board have been the big girl/boy that people look past to see the skinny girl... i am in no way trying to lose weight to be skinny to get guys by no means.... but it would be nice to have someone that is positive in my life...
hunny i totally understand where you are coming from. and i think we all need to deal with the issues behind the bingeing..
can everyone stop comparing? everyone is different, has different problems and different ways of dealing with it. unless you've walked in this beautiful young ladies shoes then stfu0 -
My intention wasn't to bash you and im sorry you took in that way....basically im just saying keep your chin up!
sorry quoted the wrong person... i was directing that towards you :]0 -
Yeah, I've had problems with eating while I was upset in the past. It's tough and just makes you feel worse in the end. Stick with it, you won't be alone forever! The perfect guy is out there waiting for you somewhere, you two just haven't met yet0
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Feel free to add me.
I'm going through similar. I moved to a new city cross country for a job and i ended up being laid off. So unfortunately I dont know many people here which is pretty hard for me since i'm pretty social and extroverted by nature.
you're right that your emotional state can have a big impact on your weight loss. i try not getting too down sabotage my efforts.
i've basically been teaching myself how to cook (eating take out was a LARGE reason i got so overweight) and working out.0 -
My intention wasn't to bash you and im sorry you took it that way....basically im just saying keep your chin up!
sorry quoted the wrong person... i was directing that towards you :]
Was or wasn't?0 -
I used to do this more when I was a teenager: when I was unhappy I ate, when I was happy I could forget about meals entirely. Since I was bullied throughout school I spent rather more of my time unhappy.
Now I tend to eat more when I am busy and stressed (high pressure job) so I can't claim I am free from mood affected eating. But I don't have unhealthy food in my house, leaving me nothing terrible to snack on when I come back from a 13/ 14 hour or more day exhausted. (which I always found the worst time as I didn't have the energy to cook properly).
People here and right: the best motivation to lose weight is for yourself, rather than for another person. Excercise is a great way to burn off some of the negativity: feel depressed or angry at men, go to a boxing class, or a run, or even a swim (I find water incredibly calm and relaxing). Even if you're still unhappy afterwards you've burnt off some calories which you can spend on comfort food.0 -
I really understand how you are feeling - there is a huge emotional side to eating and people who don't have this problem don't understand it and want to tell you to man up - if it was that easy I wouldn't be 253lbs - it might be worth going and finding a group who you can join in with it doesn't have to be a fitness group sometimes you just need company.
I am a single mum and it is very hard to get out and meet people and I quite often feel lonely - don't be put off by the people on here who are not understand and just want to bash your thoughts - as far as I was concerned these forums were supposed to be for support not putting someone down for having the bravery to admit their problems
Give the girl a break people!!!0 -
I used to feel that I would never find the right person and yes, at times, I have turned to food as a comfort. I did find the right person in the end and we have been married now nearly 19 years. Incidentally, we are on this weight loss journey together... she is not on MFP but we do work out together and our daughter loves to go to the gym and swim, so she is learning healthy habits along the way. You are 22 Years old and I am confident that you will find the right someone in due season. I remember the feelings of lonliness and at times it can be paralyzing... Many your age do... I did at your age... I do encourage you, however, to persevere and maintain your fitness... Honestly, it DOES affect how others perceive you (including perspective suitors).... Consider it a way to achieve that goal of lifetime companionship... I will concede that whomever your match is in life should love you for who you are without regard to personal appearance, but let's face it... first impressions go a long way in establishing relationships. You are an attractive young lady. Keep fit and I know that in due season, the companionship you seek will come your way.
On the other topic of this thread. There are those who may seem to be harsh. I firmly believe that they are not hating on you but rather trying to practice "tough love"... I realize when you are depressed about something, that is the last thing you want to hear... However, their intentions are really the best. They want you to see yourself through this funk and move on with your goals in live... whether it is weight loss or education or whatever...
Best wishes. Keep the faith. ::happy:0 -
My intention wasn't to bash you and im sorry you took it that way....basically im just saying keep your chin up!
sorry quoted the wrong person... i was directing that towards you :]
Was or wasn't?
wasnt sorry lol0 -
Hang in there girly....your life is gonna be amazing.0
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girl, you are 22 years old?! you won't be alone forever, I promise!! Enjoy your time to yourself, you'll be missing it later on in life. Enjoy the freedom to leave makeup and hair products all over your bathroom. Enjoy the freedom to empty everything out of your closet while looking for the perfect outfit. Enjoy the freedom to go to sleep and wake up when you want, not on someone else's schedule. Enjoy time with your friends and getting to go out whenever you want. Being alone doesn't have to be a bad thing, and I promise you won't be alone forever…so make the most of it now!! :happy:
Add me as a friend if you're looking for more MFP pals!0 -
Never let yourself H.A.L.T
Hungry, angry, lonely, tired0 -
Never let yourself H.A.L.T
Hungry, angry, lonely, tired
this i the story of my life...0
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