Ranting..but seriously..what's the deal?!!

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KristyB32
KristyB32 Posts: 76 Member
in Motivation and Support
So, after all this time..I guess I was "expecting" more noticeable results. (clothing sizes or anything)I know I can be pretty hard on myself, but I've worked my tail off thinking that by now, I would have some pretty dramatic changes. Even if I didn't so much notice, wouldn't others see a change? The only people that have taken time to say anything at all or even acknowledge that I've lost even a little weight is my immediate family, and even their comments haven't been too impressive to keep me motivated. Guess I'm just getting discouraged after 7 months of hard work and dedication. Just wondering how long it's really going to take to get the results I'm wanting and what I've been working for. Has Anyone else had or having this problem? If so, how many pounds did you lose before you or even anyone else noticed a difference? (I have about 24 more lbs to reach my short term goal, but my ultimate goal would be around 50-60 more lbs) ughh that sounds so discouraging!!! :sad: sorry for the rant..but I really need some motivation! It's gonna pay off eventually, right?!! :cry:
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Replies

  • Poods71
    Poods71 Posts: 502 Member
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    Don't let it get you down. Looking at your pictures I can see you have lost weight. Some people don't mention it because they either don't want you to think they are saying you were fat before (as some people do take have you lost weight as an insult, I know this from experience) but also some people may want to lose weight themselves and feel a little envious of how well you are doing. Also, once people have mentioned it and everyone gets used to you being smaller the compliments do stop,but what you have got to remember is that you are still doing well and people have just got used to it. The most important thing is don't do it for other people, do it for yourself. It is nice to get compliments but it is how you feel about yourself that is the most important thing. But you could always go and visit someone you haven't seen since before you lost weight for a wee compliment fix lol
  • schpanks
    schpanks Posts: 468 Member
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    Also measuring can help you see results that you don't see on the scale as your body is "remodeling." And focus on how much better you FEEL! 55 pounds is awesome!
  • mummma
    mummma Posts: 402 Member
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    you have lost loads !!! be proud, dont be disheartened. youve proved that you can do it and are well on your way to hitting your goal and posting that final weight loss story in the 'success' thread !!! you can do this!!! x
  • meerkat70
    meerkat70 Posts: 4,616 Member
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    I've lost 70lbs ish since October (more since I started, but with a bit of a hiatus) and it's only now that people are starting to make comments. I think you have to get below a certain level before people feel it's 'safe' to comment. Weight and weightloss seem to be quite embarrassing things for many people, and I suspect people would rather not risk offending, by just not saying anything. it really doesn't mean it isn't noticeable.

    But I reckon give it another 5-10lb and I bet people will start commenting.
  • BrokenButterfly
    BrokenButterfly Posts: 224
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    I found that as I was losing weight, even after 45lb that would become the new 'fat me'. It's so hard to see how well you've already done when you're focusing so much on how far you have to go.
  • KitTheRoadie
    KitTheRoadie Posts: 641 Member
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    Don't lose faith in yourself, you have come this far and you can really see the difference! :flowerforyou:

    Some people are so wrapped in their own lives that they don't notice things going on right in front of them! Honestly you are doing amazing and as long as you feel better, that's all that counts!

    Keep going, you will get there, you CAN do it!

    :smile:
  • Debbe2
    Debbe2 Posts: 2,071 Member
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    Have you looked carefully at your profile picture? My goodness, you are doing wonderfully! My advise is to be kind to yourself and look for all the changes you've made and celebrate them when you notice them! The nsv's are as important as the number on the scale. Has your health improved? Do you feel more comfortable in your clothing? Walking a distance or up stairs? All the types of things your working towards and achieving. Recognize the achievements because it will help you realize that your hard work is paying off. :flowerforyou:
  • niksinnotts
    niksinnotts Posts: 62 Member
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    its clear from your pictures that there is a big difference, you look great so don't be discouraged. i do think that sometimes people are unsure of whether to say anything so don't unless you mention first that you have been trying to lose weight. i have actually lost 35 lbs since last year and very few people have said anything!! i figure they are jealous,:wink: keep going and try to think of the satisfaction you will have when you hit your target, even if nobody else cares, everyone on mfp will be proud of you!!:flowerforyou:
  • sumeetn
    sumeetn Posts: 56
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    you are loosing weight and getting fitter for YOU not foe THEM.. so chin up and carry on :-)
  • KristyB32
    KristyB32 Posts: 76 Member
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    Don't let it get you down. Looking at your pictures I can see you have lost weight. Some people don't mention it because they either don't want you to think they are saying you were fat before (as some people do take have you lost weight as an insult, I know this from experience) but also some people may want to lose weight themselves and feel a little envious of how well you are doing. Also, once people have mentioned it and everyone gets used to you being smaller the compliments do stop,but what you have got to remember is that you are still doing well and people have just got used to it. The most important thing is don't do it for other people, do it for yourself. It is nice to get compliments but it is how you feel about yourself that is the most important thing. But you could always go and visit someone you haven't seen since before you lost weight for a wee compliment fix lol

    Thank you :) it's not as much a "compliment" I'm looking for..just more acknowledgement of how hard I've worked so far you know? But even that is not as important as the difference I'm wanting to see for myself. I just thought I would feel better about my progress than I do. Trust me..I wouldn't be offended at all if someone even said "you're not AS fat as you were" because then I know the hard work must be paying off. :laugh: but again, as I said, I'm looking for more from myself above anything else. :smile:
  • KristyB32
    KristyB32 Posts: 76 Member
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    I found that as I was losing weight, even after 45lb that would become the new 'fat me'. It's so hard to see how well you've already done when you're focusing so much on how far you have to go.

    YES...this is SO me!! :indifferent: always focusing on how far I have to go. :frown:
  • ksimpson1978
    ksimpson1978 Posts: 11
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    55lb is an outstanding loss!!! SMILE LIKE A MANIAC COS YOU HAVE GOOD REASON TO!!!

    So in your photos you're wearing black in both and I think a nice new fitted outift to show off your new shape is in order. Go on, treat yourself, and show them all how FANTASTICOLA you are!!

    I think you're amazing and I can't wait for my weight loss to match yours!!!

    Do not lose momentum, you've worked so hard and just look in the mirror and say, DAMN, I'M HOT!! Cos saying the truth out loud gets it into your brain. :wink:

    In addition I've lost a little and my husband never notices but he sees me every day right? So last month he was in TX for 4 weeks (we live in scotland) and when he came back he totally noticed the difference. It was only 10lb but he kept saying, your face is different, your arms are different...every day it was like it was dawning on him... ...seeing what I didn't.

    So don't be too hard on the folks you see on a daily basis....and dress to show off!!

    You rock! :bigsmile:
  • stevewynjones
    stevewynjones Posts: 1,143 Member
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    Not what you want to hear...but it takes time! slow and steady is the secret to this...or your body won't shrink to fit! :0)
  • Living4Liz2012
    Living4Liz2012 Posts: 312
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    I know where your coming from and it will come...slowly but surely...don't give up hope and keep your eyes on the prize...It took me drop 77 pounds before anyone including myself even noticed
  • Tuesdayfortnite
    Tuesdayfortnite Posts: 3 Member
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    what every one else said, but also: you comment that only your immediate family have said anything...
    1. Your immediate family see you reguarly (if not every day) and tiny changes which add up to a large change over time can go unnoticed as it's incremental (nobody notices the glacier moving ;-) - have they seen your amazing before/after photos?
    2. If it's your immediate family is it possible to give them permission to randomly acknowledge how well they think you are doing? It's possible that they are very impressed and proud of your dedication but don't know that you want to hear it (or are worried about 'drawing attention' to it - my partner was) or it hasn't occured to them to say anything.

    You're doing so well!
  • KristyB32
    KristyB32 Posts: 76 Member
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    Thanks everyone! Very encouraging/motivating words from you all! :blushing: I knew all of my fellow mfp'ers would understand and give great advice! :flowerforyou:
  • Bonita_Lynne_58
    Bonita_Lynne_58 Posts: 2,845 Member
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    Looking at your profile pic....there have been wonderful changes. When I look in the mirror it's hard for me not to see myself at my highest weight....but if you look at yourself...really look...You will see what an amazing job you're doing!
  • skinnybride2013
    skinnybride2013 Posts: 7
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    Wow, looking at your profile pics you've lost a lot! Well done!!
    Its like everyone say: the people that see you everyday prob won't notice it, tough but true. This is only my 1st week on here (will have my weigh in later in the week) and have loads to loose. I know I prob be like you, a bit disappointed if no one notices that you have lost weight. But, YOU know you have and I guess you feel quite fantastic too?! And, the scales dont lie ;) Keep up the good work!!
  • suelegal
    suelegal Posts: 1,282 Member
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    I'm going to add my kudos too! Did you really look at the difference between your profile pics? It's a HUGE difference!! Seriously. I'm sure that same difference is visible in every part of your body! It's very hard to be patient and watch slow progress, and it's so difficult to be easy on ourselves. Like the rest of us, we rely on others to encourage us, and some people just don't do that, for so many reasons. Come here, let us do that. AFter all, we all know exactly what you've achieved, and we understand your struggles! We're your best friends when it comes to this aspect of your life!
  • roachhaley
    roachhaley Posts: 978 Member
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    I feel the exact same way. My starting weight was 150 and I am now 129. I thought my goal weight was going to be 135 but when I got there I realised i wanted to lose at least 20 more pounds.

    Part of the reason was because literally NOBODY said anything. I'm a pretty short girl, so a 21 pound weight loss should make a difference. Finally my boyfriend said something but only because I kept mentioning it.

    MEH.

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