Ranting..but seriously..what's the deal?!!

2

Replies

  • mariagabriella
    mariagabriella Posts: 267 Member
    I can see the changes in your picture - well done!

    Sometimes people don't know what to say, or if they should say anything. I've had people ask me if I've lost weight then say "I noticed before but didn't know if I should've said anything" so maybe people are noticing, just not saying anything!

    Don't get too worried about it. You're doing this for you, and you will see more results as you keep going. :)
  • Kath_21
    Kath_21 Posts: 19
    I've lost 40lbs and the only people who have said anything to me are the ones who know I have actually lost weight and then they are surprised to hear how much I have lost. I think it depends on how much weight you have to lose. I want to lose another 80-100lbs so 40lbs to me feels like, as my friend would say, throwing a deckchair off the titanic (haha).
    I'm sure you can see the weight loss but people who see you all the time may not notice it because they see you shrinking in front of them. I bet if you ran into someone you haven't seen since starting your journey then they would notice!
    Don't get discouraged, keep at it! 50lbs is a huge achievement and you should be so proud of yourself.
  • lulabellewoowoo
    lulabellewoowoo Posts: 3,125 Member
    GREAT JOB!

    Also, if you want to "notice" a difference, take a look at your eating habits, your exercise tolerance...These are differences we make that make a difference. Be proud of those. Without you realizing it, it will inspire people. And even when you are done losing the weight you want and are maintaining and people get used to it and stop commenting, those successes will stay with you and will continue to be noticed.

    YOU ARE A SUCCESS! Keep it going...
  • sarafil
    sarafil Posts: 506 Member
    A lot of times people are hesitant to mention weight loss, because they are afraid it will come off as insulting (ie, "you were so big before, but now you look great!"). So just because people aren't saying anything, it doesn't mean they aren't noticing. All I can say is your profile picture surely shows a lot of weight loss.
  • KristyB32
    KristyB32 Posts: 76 Member
    Have you looked carefully at your profile picture? My goodness, you are doing wonderfully! My advise is to be kind to yourself and look for all the changes you've made and celebrate them when you notice them! The nsv's are as important as the number on the scale. Has your health improved? Do you feel more comfortable in your clothing? Walking a distance or up stairs? All the types of things your working towards and achieving. Recognize the achievements because it will help you realize that your hard work is paying off. :flowerforyou:

    :blushing: Awe thank you! and yes, all of the things you've mentioned have improved. I know I'm just being hard on myself, I realize I've come a long way..I just get in these moods where I think of how long it's taking and I just assume I should be doing much better. Btw- you are doing quite wonderful yourself! :flowerforyou:
  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,937 Member
    A lot of times people are hesitant to mention weight loss, because they are afraid it will come off as insulting (ie, "you were so big before, but now you look great!"). So just because people aren't saying anything, it doesn't mean they aren't noticing. All I can say is your profile picture surely shows a lot of weight loss.

    I completely agree with this!

    I can see a huge difference in your profile pic. You look great!

    I think sometimes people see a change, but are worried about saying anything and offending the person. I also think sometimes people wonder "Are they ill and that's why they're losing weight?" and don't want to say anything... just in case.

    I've lost nearly 60lbs and went to a baby shower where I hadn't seen 3/4 of the people in at least 2-4 years. Only ONE person said anything about my weight loss. I was a bit bummed - not because I wanted compliments, but I was worried that the weight loss wasn't as noticeable as *I* thought maybe it was?
  • kurenaikumo
    kurenaikumo Posts: 271 Member
    I don't like mentioning it unless it's someone I'm very close with (ie I wouldn't say it to a neighbor or casual co-worker etc). As a few others have said, some people will take offense!

    More importantly, remember you're doing this so that YOU feel healthier, so that YOU can enjoy being active and so that YOU feel more confident/happy with your looks. Not to impress Tom, ****, or Harry, right?
  • STrooper
    STrooper Posts: 659 Member
    Remember, you are doing this for yourself. And many people have no real idea of what to say...it points to their own flaws, perhaps.

    How far did it take? Oh, about 50 pounds. I had to lose about 20 percent of my body weight.

    Last year, even though I did not lose much weight, my body shape continued to change and people eventually noticed that.
  • mlybrn
    mlybrn Posts: 31 Member
    When I lost weight, loads of people complimented me on it, but to be honest it just made me feel more insecure as I felt I had to keep up the momentum to keep getting the compliments. I've regained a few pounds since, and I'm terrified people will notice it because they drew so much attention to the initial weight loss. So compliments can go both ways!

    Also, when someone loses weight their mindset alters more slowly. You might look in the mirror and still see a 'fat' person because that's what you're accustomed to seeing, and it's how you've seen yourself for so long. Look at old and new photos of yourself for comparison; and I'm sure people you don't see very often have noticed the difference, even if they haven't said so.
  • LFiestan
    LFiestan Posts: 175 Member
    ok, how can they not notice when we ourselves can? Looking at your photo you really have lost alot of weight and you look great.

    Maybe those people just didnt care or dont know you well enough, so dont pay attention to them. Your before and after shows the results and you did a great job of loosing the pounds.
  • kimmianne89
    kimmianne89 Posts: 428 Member
    I feel exactly like this! I even just wrote a status thing on it.
    I have lost 14lbs and have 19lbs left to lose yet am still just as chunky!
    I have lost a few bumps here and there and the 'muffin tops' but still feel the same overall size. Not much of a difference in clothes or measurements. It is so discouraging.

    From seeing your pictures there is definitely a noticable difference. Keep going you will reach your goal and be so happy you kept going. Just remember, even if not at your goal you are still smaller than you were before. Good luck! x
  • KristyB32
    KristyB32 Posts: 76 Member
    A lot of times people are hesitant to mention weight loss, because they are afraid it will come off as insulting (ie, "you were so big before, but now you look great!"). So just because people aren't saying anything, it doesn't mean they aren't noticing. All I can say is your profile picture surely shows a lot of weight loss.

    I completely agree with this!

    I can see a huge difference in your profile pic. You look great!

    I think sometimes people see a change, but are worried about saying anything and offending the person. I also think sometimes people wonder "Are they ill and that's why they're losing weight?" and don't want to say anything... just in case.

    I've lost nearly 60lbs and went to a baby shower where I hadn't seen 3/4 of the people in at least 2-4 years. Only ONE person said anything about my weight loss. I was a bit bummed - not because I wanted compliments, but I was worried that the weight loss wasn't as noticeable as *I* thought maybe it was?

    Wow! You look amazing! I wish I had full body before/during/afters, but I always made sure no one took one of me or else! lol Maybe then I could see for myself the changes occurring. Fantastic work! Very inspirational! :flowerforyou:
  • KristyB32
    KristyB32 Posts: 76 Member
    When I lost weight, loads of people complimented me on it, but to be honest it just made me feel more insecure as I felt I had to keep up the momentum to keep getting the compliments. I've regained a few pounds since, and I'm terrified people will notice it because they drew so much attention to the initial weight loss. So compliments can go both ways!

    Also, when someone loses weight their mindset alters more slowly. You might look in the mirror and still see a 'fat' person because that's what you're accustomed to seeing, and it's how you've seen yourself for so long. Look at old and new photos of yourself for comparison; and I'm sure people you don't see very often have noticed the difference, even if they haven't said so.

    I didn't really think of it this way, but it makes complete sense! I def still see the fat person, that's why I wish I had more/better before photos.
  • WhittRak
    WhittRak Posts: 567 Member
    Number one: You look amazing. Number two: YOU LOOK AMAZING!. Screw that scale! It is very obvious that your hard work is paying off! :flowerforyou:
  • connie_messina
    connie_messina Posts: 495 Member
    you look amazing! i see the results!! u should be proud how far u have come!!
  • peacefulsong
    peacefulsong Posts: 223 Member
    I think it's hard for people who see you regularly to see slow changes. I mean it's hard for us to see slow changes in ourselves just by looking in the mirror. A few years ago I lost 60 pounds and no one outside my family (who knew I was trying) mentioned it. I myself couldn't really see it until I compared some before and after pictures. The subject came up with a friend at work and she said "I did notice you'd lost some weight!" and then mentioned another coworker who'd lost 75. I see that woman every day around the building and hadn't noticed her weight loss at all until it was pointed out to me. She's still a big woman, but once I actually thought about it, I did see that she looked smaller. It's just hard to see gradual changes. And then of course there is the fact that people are hesitant to comment on weight changes in general anyway.
  • julieellam
    julieellam Posts: 20 Member
    I agree with the above.

    You are doing really well but by the sounds of it you could do with being with people who give you that support and encouragement. I've found that my gym buddies are the best motivation for me, as they are working to a similar goal and know how motivational a few positive words can be.

    If you ever feel you are not achieving as much as you want make a list of all the things that have changed.

    You've got to congratulate yourself. 55lbs is amazing. Keep doing what you are doing, you're doing great!
  • bridgie101
    bridgie101 Posts: 817 Member
    So, after all this time..I guess I was "expecting" more noticeable results. (clothing sizes or anything)I know I can be pretty hard on myself, but I've worked my tail off thinking that by now, I would have some pretty dramatic changes. Even if I didn't so much notice, wouldn't others see a change? The only people that have taken time to say anything at all or even acknowledge that I've lost even a little weight is my immediate family, and even their comments haven't been too impressive to keep me motivated. Guess I'm just getting discouraged after 7 months of hard work and dedication. Just wondering how long it's really going to take to get the results I'm wanting and what I've been working for. Has Anyone else had or having this problem? If so, how many pounds did you lose before you or even anyone else noticed a difference? (I have about 24 more lbs to reach my short term goal, but my ultimate goal would be around 50-60 more lbs) ughh that sounds so discouraging!!! :sad: sorry for the rant..but I really need some motivation! It's gonna pay off eventually, right?!! :cry:

    Don't get too toey with them. They could be doing what they would be doing if they were my family...

    which is not rocking the boat lest they capsize it. If they go overboard 'wow, wow, amazing!' eek they can run the risk of you stopping dieting. It happens to the best of us. That feeling of satisfaction that you've made it takes all the heat out of the actual desire to keep going. You feel like sitting down and having a party and with the best will in the world they've taken the wind out of your sails.

    Also: when people are dieting, EVERYTHING you say is the wrong thing to say because any comment goes the wrong way. I don't know why or how, I dish it out and I get it back, it's always the same: It's never the right thing to say, and it never satisfies what's inside you in terms of what you need to hear. If anyone asks 'well what do you want to hear, then' you might find you're stumped. It's not a word you want, it's a feeling you want to have. And they can't give you that feeling.

    Heh.

    And in closing, something my mother comes out with a lot: 'fools and children should never see a job half done'. Best not to have an opinion until the task is completed. Mum and bro and sis may well be sitting there, fingers crossed, a huge party planned for when you hit goal, but utter silence to your face because they don't want to be the person that said the dumb thing that knocked you off the diet. you just never know what people are thinking. Keep on trucking and just do what you do. :)
  • XXXMinnieXXX
    XXXMinnieXXX Posts: 3,459 Member
    I've lost 56lbs over the last year, and not nearly as many people have noticed as I'd like lol. The people who matter have though and that's all that is important in my eyes! Judging by this people think you'll feel offended, which seems crazy to me, but many people have said it so it must be true. I only have to look at my before and afters to feel proud. I look so different. I really look quite ugly on the befores to be totally honest. The weight had ruined my features. They are starting to come back and I'm looking prettier and more importantly happier. I look so damn miserable in the first. Take a proper look at your before and afters, like others have said take in the other advantages of this journey. Be happy your doing something for you! You'll have a happier, healthier life. Be able to get nice clothes, feel pretty, be fit and healthy! Doesn't really matter what others think its the benefits to you, and they are endless! X
  • olong
    olong Posts: 255 Member
    Dear Kristy: Congratulations on your weight loss! I can really see the difference your hard work is making! Keep up the good work!

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