Just now realizing that my goal is unrealistic

SergeantSunshine_reused
SergeantSunshine_reused Posts: 5,382 Member
edited December 2024 in Motivation and Support
Sometimes we all have that moment or wake up call. Guess I need to vent a bit.

I have a clear picture in my head of what I want to look like. I will work hard towards anything. Changing body composition from skinny fat to fit is something that has taken me quite some time to reverse. Now that I am getting leaner, and have the flat stomach I see that this clear picture in my head is going to take a LOT longer to achieve then I think I had first assumed.

I have been lifting for a few years now, so I though I had a good amount of muscle on me. But I must not have as much as I thought.

Just for a visual ( I know its not everyone's cup of tea but it is my absolute dream and what I am busting my *kitten* for)
tumblr_loegw2NKI41qhatv8o1_400-1.jpg

and me currently as of a couple hours ago

FxCam_1335548987263.jpg


I want the abs, I want the v, I want to be ripped. But well I am getting closer and closer to underweight and just am not sure how much more weight I can really lose. And I am in a position at the moment where i do not want to gain right now. I don't want to put on weight over the summer, I wan to be lean for once in shorts and a bikini xD not gaining >.< That will wait until fall

So I guess what I need to get out is that I had an unrealistic goal in my head. It takes time and effort. I am giving it tons of effort, just need to be better about the time part. A little bummed that it will take me another 1-2 years just to start to get some good build to me. Strong and determined so I will get there, but realizing you have been unrealistic is not exactly a great feeling.

Bah. Thanks for reading >.<
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Replies

  • DixiedoesMFP
    DixiedoesMFP Posts: 935 Member
    I vote: Stay the way you are for the summer. Maintain and lift. But enjoy the bikini and the booty shorts.

    In the fall: bulk! I've seen the way you dress in four or five layers....no one will notice :).
  • Shizzman
    Shizzman Posts: 527 Member
    It might not be in your genetics, but after the summer you can keep trying...doesn't hurt adding more muscle! You're already hot so anything further is bonus!
  • contingencyplan
    contingencyplan Posts: 3,639 Member
    As a woman your body naturally wants to maintain above a certain bodyfat percentage. Your hormone production is actually linked to it. Getting below that "healthy" bodyfat level is going to take a long time and a lot of work because, well, it takes you outside of the range of your bodily functions working at their optimum level.

    EDIT:

    What plagues you is something I see all too common in women: Setting unrealistic goals in fitness/weight loss. It bugs me to be able to say this. My trainer says he hates female clients for this very reason: They come in with unrealistic goals and nothing he can tell them with his degree and certification in the field can change their minds.
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    You look amazing. Sometimes our goals take longer for us to reach than we expected.......The important thing is you still have a plan to get there....and you will. Your goals isn't unrealistic.....possibly just your timeline. I think most of us are guilty of thinking we have a bit more muscle than we do when carrying excess fat. It isn't until we strip the fat away that we realize we want/need more.....I've done that cycle several times......
  • MJ7910
    MJ7910 Posts: 1,280 Member
    i think you look great and i think over time with lifting and eating right you will get there. i agree that some peopel can't add as much muscle. i would love to look as you do now, actually.
  • atrjohnson
    atrjohnson Posts: 77 Member
    I have set a weight goal for myself that may also be unrealistic. We have to adjust our time frame and ideas as we go. You may get there just not today but with time and patience it may happen. I saw may only because everybody is different and I have no idea what yours is capable of doing. This is a long journey and we just have to take every stride with an open mind.
  • ChitownFoodie
    ChitownFoodie Posts: 1,562 Member
    You look amazing! You will get there in time, but for right now, you should proud of how far you have gotten. You are healthier, sexier and leaner than most people. There are so many people that want YOUR body!
  • EmCarroll1990
    EmCarroll1990 Posts: 2,832 Member
    I love that photo, I'd like to get there one day too, maybe just a little less definition. But like some others have said, maybe stay where you are and then when fall comes around, start bulking up. Worst case scenario, you lean down again next summer if you're not where you want and start fresh again next fall.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    I believe in YOU!!!
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    First off, you look amazing already. I know you're not at your goal, but I'm glad you realize that just losing more weight isn't going to get you to that goal.

    Switch to maintenance, keep kicking *kitten*, and enjoy your summer.
  • nutandbutter
    nutandbutter Posts: 447
    I vote: Stay the way you are for the summer. Maintain and lift. But enjoy the bikini and the booty shorts.

    In the fall: bulk! I've seen the way you dress in four or five layers....no one will notice :).

    Agreed!
  • hollyeverhart
    hollyeverhart Posts: 397 Member
    I think you look great now & I see how hard you work on here & I'm sure if you stick to what you have been doing you can accomplished your goals..

    On another note about the first picture, I just have to say DAMN. That girls abs are crazy awesome!!! Thats dedication.. She has a better body then most guys, I want definition, not quite that cut looking but you have to respect all the hard work put into that!
  • Smuterella
    Smuterella Posts: 1,623 Member
    You WILL get there. You need to bulk I suspect, but for what its worth, I'd kill for your stomach as it is right now. xxx
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    First off, you look amazing already. I know you're not at your goal, but I'm glad you realize that just losing more weight isn't going to get you to that goal.

    Switch to maintenance, keep kicking *kitten*, and enjoy your summer.
    As usual, what she said is spot on.
  • myfitnessnmhoy
    myfitnessnmhoy Posts: 2,105 Member
    I look at those two pictures and think: The second looks like a hot babe that, were I not happily married, I'd be trying very hard to get a phone number from. In my youth, I'd have walked in front of a bus just to get noticed by someone looking the way you do.

    And accept the fact that you now have a bod that men would die for. Seriously.

    EDIT: To remove comments based on my own ignorance of the first picture. I apologize if my lack of experience with this sort of muscle-building has caused offense.
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
    I vote: Stay the way you are for the summer. Maintain and lift. But enjoy the bikini and the booty shorts.

    In the fall: bulk! I've seen the way you dress in four or five layers....no one will notice :).

    This. I think you are going to have to go through a couple serious bulking sessions to get that look. LOTS of food. A good solid hypertrophy program. You're young. I know you are super strong and have been lifting for a while but I don't think you've been lifting while eating at a surplus and/or while doing a hypertrophy program. Don't give up on it all together, just know that it's not going to happen this summer. You look awesome as you are. Enjoy it. Improve in the future.
  • EbbySoo
    EbbySoo Posts: 267 Member
    If I were you I'd be lifting heavy, eating lots ALL YEAR ROUND. Seriously. It's going to take a lot of eating to put any fat back onto your frame if your working hard and managing your macros/calories. Your goal isn't unrealistic, you just keep fearing the process to get yourself there. You know I love ya, but I have to be brutally honest. Do not fear the bulk.
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
    I look at those two pictures and think: The first picture looks like a very ill person with a possible eating disorder - dear God you can see her pelvis - that just can't be good!, and the second looks like a hot babe that, were I not happily married, I'd be trying very hard to get a phone number from. In my youth, I'd have walked in front of a bus just to get noticed by someone looking the way you do.

    Don't lose any more weight. Go to maintenance and start doing core work if you think you need more definition, and I really don't think you do. But building a little muscle never hurt no one. Building muscle will put weight on you, but it won't be visible weight because it's all muscle (which is denser than fat).

    And accept the fact that you now have a bod that men would die for. Seriously. The other body looks more like something you die OF.

    That's not her pelvis, it's a tendon. People with eating disorders don't have muscles that big. Let's not be insulting.
  • Shock_Wave
    Shock_Wave Posts: 1,573 Member
    Just cause your skinny doesnt mean you will pop out a 6 pack. Look at those ethiopians they are super skinny and they all dont run around with a 6 pack. Like any muscle you have to work at it and work the piss out of it. Break it down then repair then repeat. I only work on my abs once a week but usually in a grand total rep range of 500-1000. Some times I use weights and some times I dont. But you have to have a solid muscle in order to truly define it. If I were you I would work it out x2 a week. After several months then start adding resistance.
  • 120weeks
    120weeks Posts: 242 Member
    For the first time in my life, I have given myself a realistic timeline of 120 weeks to reach my desired fitness level. With planning and a bodybuilding diet, you will achieve your goals. I wish you all the best + patience + continued dedication! :)
  • Shizzman
    Shizzman Posts: 527 Member
    I look at those two pictures and think: The first picture looks like a very ill person with a possible eating disorder - dear God you can see her pelvis - that just can't be good!, and the second looks like a hot babe that, were I not happily married, I'd be trying very hard to get a phone number from. In my youth, I'd have walked in front of a bus just to get noticed by someone looking the way you do.

    Don't lose any more weight. Go to maintenance and start doing core work if you think you need more definition, and I really don't think you do. But building a little muscle never hurt no one. Building muscle will put weight on you, but it won't be visible weight because it's all muscle (which is denser than fat).

    And accept the fact that you now have a bod that men would die for. Seriously. The other body looks more like something you die OF.

    That's not her pelvis, it's a tendon. People with eating disorders don't have muscles that big. Let's not be insulting.

    :) as Rae said, people with eating disorders don't get that kind of muscle (heck they lose normal muscle and bone density)
  • MrsRipdizzle
    MrsRipdizzle Posts: 490 Member
    I've seen your pics around and I have to say - you are gorgeous. I would love to have your body just as it is now. I applaud you for recognizing your goal isn't quite what you thought it would be initially and now making changes to get there. I agree with many others that a little bit of bulking with all that heavy lifting would probably bring you right where you want to be with time. Enjoy the process girl - you look fantastic, just HAWT! I'm sure you'll get to your desired look in time too - you sound very driven and committed!
  • clobercow
    clobercow Posts: 337 Member
    Keep on lifting! Keep on the diet and keep on the cardio. It can happen, just make sure you are healthy doing it!

    But as a side note, you already look amazing!
  • Trail_Addict
    Trail_Addict Posts: 1,340 Member
    Both pics look amazing! Do what you want. You know the right path to get there, while staying healthy.
  • Mommyof3texans
    Mommyof3texans Posts: 347
    I want to say first, you look beautiful. Second, thank you for posting this. I don't think its that your goal is unrealistic, but that it takes time to really build muscle. I also am hoping it just pops up overnight and realistically... it takes a LOT of hard work and great eating!

    If you want it, you will get there! I wanted to re-iterate, not to fear the eating. Since you don't have to lose, you will actually need to eat at a surplus to put on some muscle.
  • BiscuitsNDavy
    BiscuitsNDavy Posts: 212 Member
    Do you know who this picture is of? It looks photoshopped, airbrushed at best.
  • Smuterella
    Smuterella Posts: 1,623 Member
    Look at those ethiopians they are super skinny and they all dont run around with a 6 pack.

    ummm...
  • Aperture_Science
    Aperture_Science Posts: 840 Member
    Do you know who this picture is of? It looks photoshopped, airbrushed at best.

    I think it's Jodie Marsh.

    Edit: after a quick google I realise it's probably not Jodie Marsh. As you were people.
  • myfitnessnmhoy
    myfitnessnmhoy Posts: 2,105 Member
    That's not her pelvis, it's a tendon. People with eating disorders don't have muscles that big. Let's not be insulting.

    Then I apologize for my ignorance and will delete that part of my post, my intent was not to be insulting.
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
    That's not her pelvis, it's a tendon. People with eating disorders don't have muscles that big. Let's not be insulting.

    Then I apologize for my ignorance and will delete that part of my post, my intent was not to be insulting.

    Sorry, I didn't mean to jump on you. People tend to jump on lean muscular woman as being "too skinny" or "sick" and it gets old quick.
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