You don't need to lose weight!

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  • nicoletherese14
    nicoletherese14 Posts: 27
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    if you are a guy and talking with one of your boys and you say, "man I am going to try a lose some weight for the summer"...your friend will reply "Yea man..you fat"

    I would rather my friends tell me this ^^ lol

    Guys are like that xD I see with my bf and his guys

    HAHA yea...Dudes are brutal to each other...It's like tough love man

    Haha this is why I have mainly guy friends ^^ they'll be honest if you really want them to
  • robot_potato
    robot_potato Posts: 1,535 Member
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    All the time. I am not at my goal yet, so kindy f*** off! One guy at work calls me 'skinny minnie'. Ugh! I am working hard to be FIT, not skinny! Skinny is for crackheads!
  • estitom
    estitom Posts: 205 Member
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    If someone said that to me, I would take it as a compliment. Their perception of you is different from your own.
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
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    I get this from quite a few people, even though I'm not trying to lose weight anymore. I just tell them I'm not trying to lose weight, but lose body fat and strengthen my muscles. I usually get an awkward sideways glance and an even more awkward pause of silence from them when I say that. I don't think a lot of people seem to understand there is a difference between just losing weight and specifically targeting fat loss vs. muscle gains.

    It is frustrating after a while though of hearing the same people say the same things. "You're done now right? You're not going to lose anymore weight, right? You don't need to lose anymore weight! You're tiny!" :P Oh well. Better than them trying to spare my feelings by lying to me when I was 60lbs overweight and telling me how pretty I looked or telling me I didn't look fat.
  • ChasingSweatandTears
    ChasingSweatandTears Posts: 504 Member
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    Yes, I get this. It's highly annoying. I have 20 pounds to lose. I have friends telling me I don't need to lose weight. Then they see me entering my cals on my phone and the next thing I know they think I have a problem or something lol.
  • ChasingSweatandTears
    ChasingSweatandTears Posts: 504 Member
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    I get this from quite a few people, even though I'm not trying to lose weight anymore. I just tell them I'm not trying to lose weight, but lose body fat and strengthen my muscles. I usually get an awkward sideways glance and an even more awkward pause of silence from them when I say that. I don't think a lot of people seem to understand there is a difference between just losing weight and specifically targeting fat loss vs. muscle gains.

    It is frustrating after a while though of hearing the same people say the same things. "You're done now right? You're not going to lose anymore weight, right? You don't need to lose anymore weight! You're tiny!" :P Oh well. Better than them trying to spare my feelings by lying to me when I was 60lbs overweight and telling me how pretty I looked or telling me I didn't look fat.

    You are where I'm Working to get to, and I can already see it coming :)
  • ChasingSweatandTears
    ChasingSweatandTears Posts: 504 Member
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    I would hear this all the time when people knew that I was losing weight, so I just stopped telling them. I'm trying to get in shape more than lose weight, but people don't understand that. They equate eating healthy as "dieting," not a lifestyle change. Being healthy and trying to lose weight can be two very different things.

    I wonder how much of this perception is due to the generally skewed public perception. A third of Americans are obese, and another third are overweight. This means that only one third of us, the minority, are actually at a healthy weight. I'm not saying that all people who say "you don't need to lose weight" do so out of jealousy, but I think that the majority of people can no longer accurately assess weight. Our idea of a normal, healthy weight has been skewed not just by the media but especially by our own sizes. If you look around and most people are overweight, then it only makes sense that people who are a healthy weight seem, in comparison, to be too small.

    Good point
  • Jordant107
    Jordant107 Posts: 218 Member
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    I have been watching a couple shows that deal with weight loss (Biggest Loser and Heavy). These people were obese or morbidly obese then they lost a lot of weight. On the show Heavy, they would go and lose weight for a month on their own. Then the cameras would show their progress. Sometimes I would be like HOLY CRAP THEY GOT SO SKINNY! *jaw drops* then they would step on the scale and still be a good 50 pounds overweight.

    I think it has to do with they are used to seeing you at a certain weight, so when you drop some you look A LOT different and A LOT skinner than what they are used to. Sometimes those people on those shows don't look like they need to lose anymore weight, but then when they step on the scale it is like "well would you look at that... weird".
    Too true!!
  • holdondreamaway
    holdondreamaway Posts: 35
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    Since I was skinny growing up, when I first started this I got it from all of my friends. Nobody seemed to understand that it wasn't underweight high school me wanting to ose weight, or even current me wanting to go back to that. I just wanted the 20lb I had gained that put me in an unhealthy weight off my body. The weight I wanted to lose wouldn't even go back to high school me, my body has changed too much anyway.
    The worst was from a friend who started the summer complaining with me about the weight we had each gained and the desire for a bikini body. Then when I started she harassed me more than anybody! Eventually I learned how to interpret her as saying that she didn't want to do the work or change her habits, so why should I? She didn't want to do the research or eat differently, so she made it my problem to do so. Luckily, she was someone I was close to, so I was able to get emotional with her about how I really felt about my body (previously only the supportive boyfriend knew) and that my goals took me from an unhealthy weight to a healthy one, but up had to do it twice! Now I'm so undeniably happier (and better looking if I say so myself) that nobody bothers me about it anymore. Looking back at my face in pictures from that time, it's amazing that anybody did, but I was also very self conscious and dressed very carefully.
  • ShrinkRapt451
    ShrinkRapt451 Posts: 447 Member
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    Just wander ino a local historical museum and check out clothes from the 1950s, if you have any doubt about how society's perception of size has changed. Heck, the size 8 skirts I wore in HS would be called a 6 or a 4 these days. We are definitely more tolerant of excess weight. Which is good (from a social relatedness poin of view) and bad (from a medical point of view). I've lost enough that people notice. They tend to think it's more pounds than it really is, but my size has dropped (thank you, exercise) more than it would if I had just changed my food intake. Weight and size don't stay in the ratios people expect when you're losing a lot, and when exercise gets added to the equation.

    That said, I do wonder sometimes if those of us losing weight get too hung up on a number. The Goal Weight, that is. Because I think it's easy for those of us who have been in the Morbid Obesity category for a while to set goals that are too low. If I were to lose until I got to the "ideal body weight" for my height, I'd have to lose 25 lbs of MUSCLE to be that weight with a body fat percent of 25%. Of course, the "ideal body weight" is based on old and oversimplified formulas.

    It makes so much more sense to set a goal weight based on lean mass plus a rational fat percentage. And then do your best not to lose lean mass! That way, you focus on a number that actually MATTERS, health-wise.
  • Ed_81
    Ed_81 Posts: 31 Member
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    Parents are probably the worst for this lol. every time I see my mum she starts worrying that I'm getting too skinny. I told her that I'm still 3 stone overweight and grabbed 2 hands full of belly flub to prove my point lol. She hasn't said it since (but I'm sure she will when I lose a little more lol)

    It might not be too supportive of my lifestyle change, but it is nice to know that she cares :)
  • lucylousmummy
    lucylousmummy Posts: 348 Member
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    after losing 70+ pounds i now weigh less than i did when i left school at age 16, i have literally not been this small in 19 years. so i do get "your fine" and "you don't need to lose any more weight" "look how skinny you are" all the time. the thing is when i was 16 i was overweight by a good amount, yes its great that i have come this far but im not stopping till i hit a healthy weight. another 21 pounds to go before i reach the highest weight that i will be considered a healthy weight, ideally after 30 more pounds i will decide if for me thats enough.
    i do find that it is my friends (who are overweight) that are saying it, and i do think that it is because they are unhappy with the weight that they are but dont want to put in the work to change it
    the one and only person that i would listen to is my husband, if he said enoughs enough i would take notice, but up to now he is my biggest supporter
  • GemmaRowlands
    GemmaRowlands Posts: 360 Member
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    I've heard this recently, because I do look good in clothes now. But when I take them off I still have a visible fat roll on my stomach, slight bingo wings, and plenty of fat on my thighs and hips. So I know I need to lose weight.

    Sometimes, it's almost as though they want proof, and they're having a go at me for wanting to lose more. I'm only half a stone lower than the boundary between healthy and overweight; and I never want to go into that category again. I could gain that if I had a bad weekend!! So I need to lose this last stone, and I'm really excited to be able to maintain instead of losing. It's going to be so fun eating an extra 1,000 cals a day! (I have a 500 cal deficit and burn around 500 cals through exercise as well).
  • HeidiMightyRawr
    HeidiMightyRawr Posts: 3,343 Member
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    I've got this when I mention the gym, it's annoying because I didn't even mention losing weight! People just assume gym = wanting to lose.

    I don't mention to anybody about specifically losing weight though, apart from people on here, my bf and a couple of friends who do understand what I'm doing. People see you with clothes on and think your fine, yet they don't think that you might want to look good naked / in bikini or underwear too!

    The best solution if people do ask, is just to say your just focusing on eating right, and exercising to get healthier.
  • TheFunBun
    TheFunBun Posts: 793 Member
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    It's just really SHOCKING to watch someone shrink.

    My BFF lost 100 lbs the year before last, and everytime I see her I'm like "OMG YOUR SO SKINNY" when in reality, she's on the upper end of normal weight. That said, I'm not trying to shove cake in her face either. It's just crazy when you go to hug someone and they've almost halved themselves.


    I'm tall, so I get it pretty often, but it just sounds dumb. I remember one time I was getting pretty chunky, though, and a good friend and I were talking and I was like, "I know, where the hell did this weight come from, I didn't even notice I picked it up" and she was like, "Oh, I noticed". LOL. God bless southern women. ;)

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