PMS issues? need advice/experience. (men, you can read, but

I never felt like I was a PMS-er before. Now I am beginning to wonder.

I got my IUD removed in August. It was a hormone-secreting one, so I did not have periods while I had it in (had it in for over 4 years). Before that I was pregnant, before that I had a miscarriage (only had 1 period between the miscarriage and getting pregnant with my son) before THAT (we're talking Nov of 2001 here!) I used natural family planning (nothing hormonal) and I Think I was FINE.

But, obviously, it's been 6.5 years since I've had regular periods, and a lot has changed for me in the meantime, so maybe I shouldn't even try to compare myself now to what it was like back then.

Anyway, I love my boyfriend. I feel more that he "gets" me than anyone else I've ever been with. When we are together, we often find ourselves in this little bubble, oblivious to the rest of the world, in tune with each other and enjoying each other's company.

But, last month and then again this month, we've *almost* broken up. Each time, right before my period started. I can't even say how the discussions begin, but we start talking and soon are questioning if we can ever "work out". If we're really "perfect" for each other or not. Every little thing that we disagree on seems like a tragedy, When he's gone a lot (which he is for work) it's the end of the world for me.

Then we get over it and move on. Last month I realized it all happened in the few days before my period. This month we've been "discussing" (I dont' say fighting, because we really don't FIGHT) for the last 2-3 days. Do we have a future together, etc. Now, today I start my period (I didn't think I was due for it for another 5 days, decided to come early I guess).

Are the 2 related? Do I become moody and unhappy and therefore more Picky at him right before my period. Are these break-up discussions my fault?

Has anyone else experienced this?

If you read my post this morning, I was feeling absolutely miserable about myself and the world for not losing weight. I actually sat on the stairs and cried for a little bit.

It seems like as soon as my period started, my mood changed. I went out and took a kickboxing class, came home and sat outside in the yard while my son rode his bike. My boyfriend is home making dinner and all seems right with the world again.

what gives?

Thanks everyone.

I talked to him last night about the unhappyness we seem to experience in cycles. I x-d out 4 days on the calendar next month (the 3 right before my period and 1 the first day of my period). We decided we aren't allowed to fight on those days. If there are issues, we'll discuss them once the X period is over.

I think that unrealistic expectations has some truth to it, perhaps on both of our parts, but we don't know yet how to change that. Our divorces were final within a week of each other last year. He was with his wife for 18 years, I was with my husband for 8.

My ex was home a lot more than my current boyfriend is. To me, spending time together was the "norm'. To him (my boyfriend) he already does make more of an effort to be home than he did when he was married. With her, he would often work m-saturday AND go in on sundays to prep for classes the next week (he's a teacher and coach). With me, he never goes into work on Sundays anymore. So to him,he is already making this great effort. To me, it doesn't feel like enough because my exhusband was home every weekend and didn't work 11 hr days during the week.

I feel like I want more. Time. but not a new person. It causes rifts, because I feel like he's too busy for me, and he feels like I don't appreciate what he DOES give.

Usually I can understand where he's coming from. I understand that he's not being selfish, that he's doing his JOB. not going out with the boys or playing golf all day every weekend like some Husbands. I should be happy. but there are these times when it feels like I'm always saying "goodbye" and we're never having quality time together and then when any other little tiny thing happens, It feels like the end of the world.

For example (and you all will laugh at me, this is why I think it is my fault) this week the arguing began because he forgot about the scarf he said he would buy me. He isn't the kind of guy who buys me a lot of gifts. (but he does "surprise me". After work I'll come out to my car and there will be a love note or flower under my windshield wiper). He loves me in scarves. The one I wear most often is getting worn out and he mentioned he wanted to buy me a new one. I told him what color I had wanted and we talked about it for a while. Weeks passed. No scarf. I finally bought one for myself. i thought he would say "oh! I'm sorry I hadn't had time to get one for you yet". But instead he got this sad look on his face and said "I completely forgot until I saw you wearing that". To me, it felt like... Why doesn't he remember me? How can we have this entire conversation about how he wants to do this for me, and then he just forgets? Why aren't I IMPORTANT to him (hear the hormonal part kicking in?) Just to be a B*&^% I said. "So, what was the boys' time on the distance medley at the track meet last week?" Reflexive, he answers "10:39". Then my feelings are even more hurt. How can he remember every single time of every race, the splits even, and not remember things OF ME?

sheesh.
See?

I'm a Loon when I'm hormonal!