Out of the mouths of babes...

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135

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  • avafrisbee
    avafrisbee Posts: 234 Member
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    When I met my husbands family for the first time his youngest sister was 5. We had just arrived after a long flight and we were sitting having coffee and cake at the table and here she comes running down the hall completely naked with a piece of toilet paper stuck between her cheeks (not the ones on her face) and asked if I "like her long tail". I thought my husband was going to die trying not to laugh.

    Same sister, same visit. I got strep throat and tonsillitis really really bad that visit. I was laying only half conscious in front of the fire and she kept asking me questions and poking me. My husband told her to "leave Ava alone, she's really sick and doesn't feel good" then in this really super whiny voice said "but it's haaaaaarrrrrrd!" I was so sick but I alternated between laughing and crying in pain.
  • lordsangel
    lordsangel Posts: 167
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    My grandaughter last year was in a stage where she would hide back in a corner and fill her diper.
    I was in my bedroom sorting some clothes from a box that was in the corner behind my exercise bike. I stepped backwards and hit my bare heel dead center on a piece on the bike the pain was so bad all I could do was draw that foot up and grunt with pain, My drandaughter was romping on the bed raises up on her knees and real serious asks. "Drandma drandma, are you pooping?
    thats hilarious! :laugh:
  • avafrisbee
    avafrisbee Posts: 234 Member
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    ....After losing weight ( about 50 pounds) and going on an out of state trip my daughter mentioned to relatives that I was now the "travel size daddy"....

    lololololololol
  • TrailRunner61
    TrailRunner61 Posts: 2,505 Member
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    I took my nephew hiking up some pretty big hills and he got tired, stopped and told me that the hill was 'heavy'. lol

    I had a niece over and she wanted a piece of cheese. I set it on the table and she had forgotten about it then picked it up a bit later and it flopped over. She says "MY CHEESE IS WEAK"!

    When my son was little he would call yellow bananas, Lellow bamanas. I still find it hard to say it that way.

    Also, and I just found this keepsake last winter.. One of my kids had a mother's day project in kindergarten and they had to write.. My mother is special because...... then say what they thought. He put down My mother is special because she runs in circles.

    I was visiting my niece and her sons had a new puppy. I asked them if it was going to be a hunting dog. One of the boys said no and the other ( his cousin, 5) says, the only thing my dog hunts for is a place to poop!
  • butterfli7o
    butterfli7o Posts: 1,319 Member
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    Last night in the car my 8-year old told me I looked pregnant. Thanks!!!
  • Sindari
    Sindari Posts: 39 Member
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    My (then) 4 year old niece would put her hands on my SOL's belly and say "baby". Correct and cute right? Well then she went over to my brother and did the same, said "baby". His response was "no sweetie, not baby... BEER" lol
  • afres251
    afres251 Posts: 4
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    I don't have any kids, but I'm 10 years older than my youngest brother so I remember all his cute little antics. We lived in a town that had a lot of dairies and sheep farms. We would drive around town, and my mom and I would always point to the sheep and say, "Look Daniel. How cute!" We never realized that we never actually told him what the actual name of the sheep was until a few weeks later when he tugged on my shirt and said, "Meme, can you take me to see the how cutes?" I died! We thought it was so cute, I'm sure we neglected to tell them they were sheep for some time. Poor kid! lol..
  • Aquaduckie
    Aquaduckie Posts: 115
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    These are great! I wish I could "like" all of them.
    This last week as we were driving home from church, my two kids (ages 5 and 6) were fighting in the car. I got after them and then my son retorts, "Satan made me do it! Why am I getting in trouble for it?"
    There have been many "magic moments" with my kids, just can't remember them all right now.
  • jl20whyd
    jl20whyd Posts: 79 Member
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    Both my kids have said this....
    When asked if they are behaving they reply with "we're being have"...lol
  • susieq101178
    susieq101178 Posts: 305 Member
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    My 11 year old son, Alex, is an extremely sweet and sensitive little guy - although he thinks it's a riot to play with my "teacher arms" he's generally very supportive of me and my weight/figure/appearance. He even tries to "eat healthy" like me when it appeals to him and always asks how my workout was. Just a couple of days ago we were discussing going out to eat a few times while my mom was in town this weekend. I said something about it stressing me out because I've been so dilligent about my diet that I didn't want to risk derailing my progress. Then Alex (trying to be reassuring and guarantee a trip to Buffalo Wild Wings) says, "It's okay Mom - we love you no matter what shape you are." Such a pill.
  • Bumdrahp
    Bumdrahp Posts: 1,314 Member
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    my son use to call Jerk chicken chicken jerk
    and when he wanted us to hold him...he'd reach his arms out and say"hold you" instead of hold me.lol
    and couldnt say car he would say c*ck

    one of his little girl friends use to call chalk c*ck
    and chocolate c*cklette.lol

    i am crying!!!!!!!!!!
  • ratherbeskiing
    ratherbeskiing Posts: 847 Member
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    The little girl I babysit told me that "Fat people just bigger because they have more blood."


    *She also thinks she is going on American Idol and is going to make up her own song so "they don't know when she messes up"
  • StrengthIDidntKnow
    StrengthIDidntKnow Posts: 568 Member
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    Friday night is movie night in our house. We told our daughter that we were going to start watching movies that my husband and I watched when we were her age. She sighs and asks us if that means they will all be in black and white.
  • ckes84
    ckes84 Posts: 52
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    I was sitting at the dining room table with my 3 1/2 year-old niece coloring, while my sister and my mother were discussing my sister's marital problems. So my niece would not understand what my sister was saying she spelled it out to our mom. My niece asked me what her mother had just spelled. I replied "I think Mommy is talking to Grandma about Santa Claus" - my niece puts down her crayon, looks up at me, and says "Aunt Donna, you don't know how to spell either, huh?" She's now 6 and still treats me as if I'm a little "slow" LOL
  • ihateroses
    ihateroses Posts: 893 Member
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    Topic of the day in my middle school ESL class was "At the supermarket."

    Me: "You need to buy apples. Who can you ask for help finding apples?"
    Student: "Ghost Steve Jobs"
  • TrailRunner61
    TrailRunner61 Posts: 2,505 Member
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    Here's another one I just thought of. I had 3 kids and I usually toted 1 or 2 of their friends around too so I always had a car full whenever we went anywhere. If the kids misbehaved I'd tell them that if they didn't knock it off they'd have to watch Laverne and Shirley. They would cry and say no no, no, nooo not Laverne and Shirley! Then one day when the kids were in Jr. High, one of them asked me what Laverne and Shirley was. They had no idea. LOL
    Also if they misbehaved I'd tell them that I was going to sing the Oscar Mayer Weiner song. They would BEG me to stop and they straightened right up. I can NOT sing and it's so bad that I even lip sync in church so I don't have to hear myself.
  • greeneyes191
    greeneyes191 Posts: 78 Member
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    I bought my 2 year old granddaughter a new book to help her learn letters, colors, objects, words etc. I happpened to open the book to things that were green. I was showing her that the word at the top was "green" and that the frog was green, the grass was green, the leaf was green and on and on. When I finished she just looked at me and said: "GOOD JOB GRANDMA!!"

    Hmmm, who's teaching who?!?!??
  • avafrisbee
    avafrisbee Posts: 234 Member
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    My (then) 4 year old niece would put her hands on my SOL's belly and say "baby". Correct and cute right? Well then she went over to my brother and did the same, said "baby". His response was "no sweetie, not baby... BEER" lol

    WIN!!!
  • mmtiernan
    mmtiernan Posts: 702 Member
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    When my daughter was almost three, I had a particularly exasperating morning trying to get the two of us fed, dressed, lunches packed and out the door on time - she had been dawdling at everything in that way only a 3 year old can - I finally got her in the car and was mentally making sure that I hadn't forgotten anything when she reached up from her car seat, patted my cheek and said, "Hey there Sweet Cheeks! I love you!". The rest of the day went much better!

    Same kid, fast forward 13 years and I'm at the football game where she is drum major. I wave at her as I pass by the stands, then as I'm leaving, I overhear another kid say, "Is THAT your MOM?!!?" to which my daughter replied, "The really buff one? Yep, that's her!".

    That kid is definitely a keeper!
  • 10acity
    10acity Posts: 798 Member
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    ....After losing weight ( about 50 pounds) and going on an out of state trip my daughter mentioned to relatives that I was now the "travel size daddy"....

    So cute!

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