Question for all you working parents out there

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  • vichm
    vichm Posts: 174 Member
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    I am so with you on this one, I only returned to work last week after having 11 months off on maternity (I have 9month old twins) plus a 7 year old at home. While on maternity leave I was managing a massive amount of workout time mainly because of going to the gym in the evening and whenever the babies were sleeping doing home workouts such as Jillian Michaels and now Insanity. Seriously I have become obsessed we're talking arounf 15 hours a week with a rest day! So I was concerned about not being able to workout once went back to work.

    Well Like I say im only 1 week in but working out in the morning seems to be working, I am up early (5am with the babies) I play with them and have a coffee and by 6 im awake and ready to workout. The babies go in the walkers and i have half the lounge they have the other and i do insanity before they want there cereal at 7am. Husband then gets up at 7 and feeds them while I shower and dress. I understand the fitting it in, the evenings i feel are the worst with dinner demands, bath time and grumpy tired babies. I feel its snatching some time for you,but I make sure I get this as a workout is well worth it I feel great for doing it and bad when I dont.... The dishes will still be there in 30/60 mins time.

    Maybe look at workouts that take less time, smaller workouts that you wont feel so guilty for fitting in. you can get some that are 10 minute solutions and they have these on various areas (a few people i know swear by them) and it literally is a 10 minute workout 5 on a dvd and you fit them in where you can.

    Being a working mum/ wife etc is such a busy life-......hoe you find a way to fit in some you time!
  • Will_Lift_4_Shoes
    Will_Lift_4_Shoes Posts: 238 Member
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    I have 5 kids and my husband works crazy hours (2 am to 3-4 in the afternoon on a usual day). I have to work out first thing in the morning (6 am) or later in the evening. Where I take zumba offers classes from 6 am and then they have more later at night usually 8:30 pm. It isn't feasible for me to workout right after work cuz I am doing the dinner routine and getting kids to and from activities. It makes it hectic and crazy but it is worth it. When I get home I usually put my kids to bed. They don't get to bed till late but we all are working together to make it work. Good luck finding your balance.
  • nyy03
    nyy03 Posts: 652 Member
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    Seriously... how do you find time to exercise? I don't know how to get out of my rut. I know sometimes it's lack of motivation, but most of the time it's truely lack of time.

    Since joining MFP I have not been brave enough to try to get up earlier than I already do. I am very stiff and sore when I first wake up, so moving a lot will only pull my muscles (I have tried in the past). Also, I have a 2yo at home that does not always sleep through the night. Since I am always exhausted, it does not make sense to me to get up early and be even more exhausted.

    When I get home after my 8-10 hour work days I have just enough time to make dinner while helping the older kids with their homework/housework/lives. Maybe playing with the 2yo for a few uninterrupted minutes and trying to clean up from dinner, etc...

    By that time it's 9-10 pm and I'm pooped.

    I made a deal with my hubby that he would give the 2yo her bath 3 days a week so I could do a workout for 30 minutes. He normally does it anyway, but I wanted to firm up a plan that would help keep me motivated to do it. That worked 1 time before he got sick, then the rest of us got sick. That was 3 weeks ago.

    How do you keep going when your life is not only your own? I can't say I'm going for a walk when there are dishes to be done, dinner to make and children to love and care for.
    How do you fit it in? How do you take back some of your time for yourself without pushing all responsibilities onto your spouse? I feel like I've been waiting for my kids to leave the nest so that I could be me again. Another 16 years is too long to wait.

    I don't know your home situation but how about give your spouse SOME responsibilities. It's been 3 weeks since he got sick. Why can't he bathe your child now. Being a mom of 2, I don't have time to get sick and relax. My kids get bathed even when I am sick. I understand that your child doesn't sleep, it happens. Can't you alternate between the two of you who gets up early? Make a chart with chores. You have 2 other kids, get them to set the table, do the dishes etc. Again, why can't you and your spouse alternate making dinner? You HAVE to make time for yourself.
  • Kerri_is_so_very
    Kerri_is_so_very Posts: 1,005 Member
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    I'm a single mom and work out of the home approx 50 hours/week (including travel time). My kids are 3 & 6 and I burn between 4000-5000 cals a week. I take the kids to the bike path on nice nights/weekends (my youngest rides in a bike trailer) and I can hardly keep up with the 6 year old!! LOL, I go to the Y (and they go into the child watch/kid fit center areas), I play Wii Just Dance & Zumba II WITH them (or without), I have Jillian Michaels videos (30 mins and less can do wonders), I walk 3 miles/50 minutes on my lunch break during sunny days. The other night I was doing zumba and Jillian Michaels at 9-10 pm at night. My girls eat what I eat or they have cereal or leftovers. I am not a morning person and already get up at 5:30 am to start my day, so all my cals are burned at lunch or in the evening (or weekends). You will find the more you do, the more you will want to do. I was tired at first, but now I feel great.

    I stopped all the sports/activities for the kids for the year (they were doing basketball, swimming, gymnastics etc). I figure at their young age we can skip that in exchange for a healthy/happy mom. Once I'm maintaining I will incorporate more of their stuff back into our schedules. I have my girls 100% of the time when I am not working, there is no spouse or SO to help me with them.

    Have deli sandwich nights so everyone makes their own, have some hearty crock pot meals tossed together in the morning, make a meal and freeze a meal. Or have DH do some of the meal prep.
  • vichm
    vichm Posts: 174 Member
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    I have a 6 yr old and 2 yr old twins... My husband works nights so my only time to get a workout in is at 5am. If I don't do it then and tell my self I will after work then it doesn't happen... A routine and support make all the difference. I have a neighbor who I go to the gym with so we keep eachother accountable too. For me, I had to fight through the "tired" feeling.. especially since my twins wake a few times a night when they are sick.. and they are sick alot!. If I used the "im tired and didn't sleep well" excuse then I would never become the healty me i look forward too.

    Sow ith you on this one, my twins are only 9months but I still have more nights of popping in to them from stirring sleep then sleeping though. By 7am my workout is done. Tiredness i work through it get a bit of energy and after a shower get to sit down then its rest/ sleep time.. x
  • LaceyVskmp1980
    LaceyVskmp1980 Posts: 37 Member
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    It's pretty hit and miss for me. Sometimes I'm lucky and either my husband or my oldest will cook dinner, or they will put the toddler to bed to let me have some time to exercise. I try to utilize my lunch break for at least a 15 min. walk. Hang in there, you will find a routine that will work for you.
  • onleethestrong
    onleethestrong Posts: 44 Member
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    I'm a single mom, working full time, and living in a community where I really don't know many people. I can't afford childcare, so the kiddo is with me whenever I'm not working.

    I am definately not a morning person, and chances are if that was when I planned to work out the snooze button would win the battle alsmot every time.

    I've accepted the fact that my house isn't going to be spotless all the time, I do a lot of crockpot cooking, and a lot of quick and easy meals. We bike everywhere we can, go for walks, and when my daughter is outside playing I"m right there beside her running around, acting goofy, pumping my legs as hard as I can to swing higher... I figure anything that gets my heart rate up a bit is better then nothing at all.

    She also knows that I am going to do my biggest loser video 3 times a week, and she's welcome to do it along side of me (She's 5, and her efforts always make me laugh), or find a quiet activity either in the room with me or in her room. AS much as I wish I could spend every minute focusing my energy and attention on her it's not realistic, and I need her to see that mommy cares about herself, and is doing good things for herself.

    Sometimes I will do something extra once she's in bed for the night, but I find working out too late makes me wide awake and unable to get a decent sleep. If I do something after bedtime, it's usually slow and gentle, stretching, nice relaxing yoga as opposed to Jillians idea of yoga....
  • litatura
    litatura Posts: 569 Member
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    Basically, I make me a priority for one hour during the day to exercise and stopped making excuses. I work full-time, am taking my Master's degree part-time (well, not anymore - I just completed it this month!), and have a 10 year old son. Yes, I'm tired and hungry and have a million things to do, but I ignore all that for one hour. I hit the treadmill as soon as I get home from work at suppertime. I've been doing this since July 2011 and nobody has died or starved as a result yet. ;)
  • dlhenry511
    dlhenry511 Posts: 64
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    It is very hard to juggle it all, this I know. I work about 50 hours M-F. I leave my house by 6:30am and I get home around 5:30pm. I have two boys ages 2 and 6 and here is what a typical week looks like for me. Of course you wont do the same as me, but you can modify to what you have available. You just have to make it a priority. Have a couple of options available to you so as the day goes on you can choose which will work best for you ex: do I have time to go to the gym, or will a 30 min DVD be my only option. Or you can always incorporate your kids/family into your work out routines. Take the kids for a bike ride, or go running and have them bike along or push a stroller. Exercise can be found anywhere, it is not just heading out to the gym!

    Mon: pick up oldest from school, get dinner ready, while they eat (hubby is home with them) I leave and go to the gym for my Hip Hop Class. I am home by 7:30pm to help with homework, baths, and bed time routine. This is the day I see the least of my children which sometimes makes me sad, since I already have such little time with them but they could care less!!!

    Tues: pick up oldest from school, get dinner ready, eat with the kids, go for a bike ride or walk with them (hubby is at class on this night) Home all night with the boys so it makes up for the only few hours I had with them on Monday!

    Wed: Take a Zumba class on my lunch break - get to be home all night with the boys!

    Thurs: Pick up youngest from my mother in laws, get home around 6:00pm, make dinner, eat dinner as a family and bike ride or walk together and do a DVD work out when kiddos go to bed

    Fri: I dont do anything, it is my rest day - Family movie night

    Sat: Wake up, make breakfast for the kids, go to gym for HITT class. Back home by 10:30am and I already have had a great work out in and the rest of the day ahead of me! I usually do my cleaning on this day as well

    Sun: Somtimes Zumba class or Yoga or Rest Day. This is the day I plan all my meals for the week and grocery shop

    GOOD LUCK!
  • ivyslocum
    ivyslocum Posts: 21
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    I have to be to work by 630am, I live 20 min from town, and I have to drop my 2 year old off at my mom's before work because daycare doesn't open till 7:30. Mom is a lifesaver or I'd be sunk.
    I have her drop our stroller off at daycare in the morning w/ the kiddo. When I get off work I make the half mile walk to go get her, then push her back to the car. She thinks its really fun cauz she gets to watch Netflix on my smart phone on the way back. I use the crock pot on the days that I plan to walk past the daycare an extra block or two before turning around and heading back to her.

    But we also walk the quarter-mile driveway to get the mail together.

    Also, when you are cleaning, turn up the music and do everything in a dance way.
    OHHH and mowing the yard.......huge workout.

    Its more about ramping up the stuff you already do to a faster pace.
  • jetabear10
    jetabear10 Posts: 375 Member
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    I hit the gym at 6:00 am most mornings or go exercise when my kidlets are at their event. (i.e. I run while my daughter is at piano, go to the gym while my son is at karate etc.)
  • bray2160
    bray2160 Posts: 12
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    Personally, I like P90X more than any other weight loss product because it's convenient. I can use it at my leisure and it's probably one of the only programs that I've actually seen work. I know people who are currently on the system and have lost tons of weight. Their bodies are more defined as well.

    For those of you who may be interested in getting in shape, you can get P90X for $65 at http://www.squidoo.com/where-can-i-buy-p90x also read the comments in the guestbook section to see that this place is legit.
  • kellaney
    kellaney Posts: 5
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    Here are my suggestions:
    1. Go on a 30-min walk RIGHT after you put the kids to bed. Literally have your workout gear on while you are tucking them in and walk right out the front door after you are done.
    2. Push your 2 y.o. in a stroller on a 30-min walk right before bedtime. Kids sleep great after some fresh air.
    3. Go to bed @ 9:30 and get up @ 6:00 am for a 30-min workout. That's 8 hours of sleep plus 30 min of "flex time" if your kiddo wakes up during the night.
    4. Get up and exercise even if you had a rough night. You will be much more awake with 30 min of exercise vs. 30 min of extra sleep.
  • ndblades
    ndblades Posts: 233 Member
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    I feel your pain. I love activity and exercise, but I also love a tidy house, spending quality time with my 5 kids (ages 4-14), and not relying on caffiene to keep me going. I'm finding it doesn't matter what age the kids are, the nightly feedings and evening duties of toddlers are quickly replaced with cheuffering active kids from event to event. I did make time last year to train for a triathalon -- a goal of mine, and I am happy to say at 60lbs overweight I did it, but it took a lot of "family time", so now my focus is to LOOSE the 60lbs, and then train next year for it.

    I am focusing on my eating now, which is my biggest fault, and when I am comfortable, I will focus more on the activity. You are on the right track by enlisting your hubby, once he sees your energy and mood lift with exercise, he will be very supportive. If you can use your lunch hours to get exercise great, I used to do that at my prior job, and it was wonderful, but now I only have a 30 minute lunch, and my company is located on the outside of town, so just doesn't work (I am a sweater, so I need a shower once I exercise!).

    as for always being exhausted, I have found by putting on my tennis shoes and ipod while I do my household chores, pumps me up and gives me the energy I need --- I think my body finally is used to being tired!

    Add me as a friend if you like, I could use more encouragement with moms who have a hectic schedule -- I know we are all busy, but with motherhood and full time jobs, there isn't much "consistency" in anything!
  • KLD81230
    KLD81230 Posts: 29 Member
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    Seriously... how do you find time to exercise? I don't know how to get out of my rut. I know sometimes it's lack of motivation, but most of the time it's truely lack of time.

    Since joining MFP I have not been brave enough to try to get up earlier than I already do. I am very stiff and sore when I first wake up, so moving a lot will only pull my muscles (I have tried in the past). Also, I have a 2yo at home that does not always sleep through the night. Since I am always exhausted, it does not make sense to me to get up early and be even more exhausted.

    When I get home after my 8-10 hour work days I have just enough time to make dinner while helping the older kids with their homework/housework/lives. Maybe playing with the 2yo for a few uninterrupted minutes and trying to clean up from dinner, etc...

    By that time it's 9-10 pm and I'm pooped.

    I made a deal with my hubby that he would give the 2yo her bath 3 days a week so I could do a workout for 30 minutes. He normally does it anyway, but I wanted to firm up a plan that would help keep me motivated to do it. That worked 1 time before he got sick, then the rest of us got sick. That was 3 weeks ago.

    How do you keep going when your life is not only your own? I can't say I'm going for a walk when there are dishes to be done, dinner to make and children to love and care for.
    How do you fit it in? How do you take back some of your time for yourself without pushing all responsibilities onto your spouse? I feel like I've been waiting for my kids to leave the nest so that I could be me again. Another 16 years is too long to wait.

    I used to think the same way that you do. I have three kiddos under the age of six. My youngest (2) still nurses and co-sleeps.

    I began by going to the gym at dinner time. I just did -- no excuses, no whining. I would make dinner and then my husband would come home and eat dinner with everyone while I worked out for an hour or so. I started not liking the "high-five in the hallway" that we were doing, so I started going in the morning. My old gym opened at 5:15 and I would try and be there by 5:30am. Sounds tough? Well, it was at first. But I had to decide what was more important, being sleepy (which I most certainly wouldn't be after getting to the gym) or being healthy.

    I switched gyms to one that didn't open until 6:00. I need to be home by 7:15 at the latest to help get my oldest off to Kindergarten and get ready myself for the day. I decided that I would make it work. Even though it didn't open until 6:00, someone is usually opening it up at 5:45, and after I was there consistently for while, they gave me the code to get in even earlier if I needed it.

    My youngest went through a phase where she would wake up right around the time that I needed to get up and go. I did fall off the wagon (so to speak) around that time. She woke to nurse, and the timing was just off. However, I didn't give up, and now we have a nice schedule where she is usually asleep when I'm sneaking out of bed to head to the gym.

    You will be exhausted for awhile until your body get used to it. It's just a matter of importance.

    My gym also have abbysitting hours, and so if I miss a morning workout, my two little ones come with me. They love it!! It's a treat for them to go and I get a two-hour chunk of time to run, lift, etc.

    Walking with the stroller is also a good suggestion, I love running with ours!!

    I fully support the suggestions of just get up and go even if you had a rough night. Things will ONLY get easier for you, but much harder to begin if you don't ever start!
  • mom2mozart
    mom2mozart Posts: 307 Member
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    I also don't like to get up early, but I've found that if I don't work out in the morning, my day can just pass me by... I'm often too tired after dinner and have found that evening work-outs energize me and then I have trouble falling asleep. I'm forcing myself to get out of bed while the kids are still asleep to work out - I get up about 45 minutes before them. By the time they are going to bed at night I'm also ready to curl up with a book and read until it is time for sleep.

    If I need to work out at night, I encourage them to come with me (our home gym is in the garage). I will ask my older son to try and read to me (so he is practicing his reading) or I just try and talk to them about their day. Sometimes they just goof off, I'll give them photo albums or something to look at while I sweat. Or they will ride their bikes around me or do an art project or play with Legos while I'm working out.

    It is not easy, but you have to decide what your priorities are and make time.

    PS before kids I used to power walk at lunch. I would go on a 20 - 30 minute walk every day. I was in tremendous shape doing that while eating healthy. That might also be an option for you.

    Good luck.
  • Wonderwoman2677
    Wonderwoman2677 Posts: 434 Member
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    I've been overwhelmed by the responses today!! Thank you so much for taking the time to share. Others posted that they got some great ideas too, so thanks for helping everyone! I'm so motivated right now... I can't wait to get home to play with the kids and put some ideas into action.

    To answer some questions... I have 5 kids and the hubby does help :) Also, my house is definately not magazine cover ready. Most days it's not even company ready. We're both so tired all the time we are not helping to motivate each other right now. Which is a nice way of saying we're just kinda being lazy :grumble:

    I have been working on dealing with depression issues and I just found out last week I'm anemic, so I'm working on that too. I'm not a good self-motivator. Thanks for helping me get better!

    :heart: :heart: