Serious dose of motivation needed!

Michelle650
Michelle650 Posts: 218
edited December 2024 in Health and Weight Loss
When I was 15, I weighed just under 190lbs. I was unhappy, very VERY self conscious and disgusted at how I let myself get so big! So in march 2011, myself and my sister both decided to lose the weight once and for all. Upon joining MFP, I weighed 176lbs. I never took any before pictures, just started eating 1200 calories and exercising. By August of that year I weighed a nice 158lbs. I was so proud of myself for losing it.

In the mean time, my sister, who I started this journey with went to France for the summer. I worked my *kitten* of exercising and eating well and she enjoyed herself and wasn't too strict foodwise. When she returned after 3 months, she had lost 10lbs and I had only lost a measly 1lb. I was so disappointed! She looked amazing when she returned! After that I seemed to lose all motivation. We had started this journey together, we always would go to each other in the mornings after weighing in and ask each other how much we lost. It was such motivation. But now she is at a healthy weight that she is happy with and here I am after gaining all mine back. I have no motivation. I care, but I don't care if that makes sense!

I'm in a viscous cycle and I don't no how to stop it. I wish I appreciated my weight loss the first time around. Please is there anyone out there who's the same or has a similar experience. I would love if someone could help me get motivated again, I just don't know what to do anymore. Thanks.

Replies

  • greaseswabber
    greaseswabber Posts: 238 Member
    You've been very successful so far. It would be a shame to loss the progress you've made.

    People lose weight differently, at different rates and in different ways. It can be motivating to compare, and maybe compete?, with your sister. But keep in mind that for the three months she's was away she was eating completely different foods. Different caloric densities and probably less sugar. Not because she was trying, but because food in other countries is grown and made differently.

    If you were working out hard all summer, maybe you were increasing your muscle mass. The number on the scale is one way to measure progress. How your clothes fit and how you feel moving around are another. Use them too.

    My brother lost more weight than I plan to lose. I've been jealous and envied him at times. He is now one of my motivators. I'm happy for him that he has achieved a healthy weight. I know if he can do it, so can I.

    In the end, motivation has to come from within. Your sister didn't lose the weight for you. You did it. You can keep doing it.
  • sun33082
    sun33082 Posts: 416 Member
    Check out this post. She gained 1 pound but check out the difference. If you're working out, you can't always depend on the scale.
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/580019-the-scale-is-a-lying-torture-device-i-m-proof?hl=scale+devil
  • Athena98501
    Athena98501 Posts: 716 Member
    Given that you were exercising, 1200 calories isn't nearly enough. When you're eating that far below what you need, you can slow your metabolism down. 1200 wouldn't cut it unless you were quite short, and sedentary.

    If you were inputting all of that into MFP, it would tell you that you need to eat more.
  • Drastiic
    Drastiic Posts: 322 Member
    This sounds like a pity party. No one can motivate you more than yourself. Keeping the weight off involves a lifestyle change, and it doesn't seem like you're ready to take that step. You're in that vicious cycle, because you keep quitting. If you'd stop quitting, you wouldn't have to keep starting over. You keep talking about short-term events, but you're missing the big picture.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    You can't compare yourself to other people. Your body is yours and yours alone.

    Write down 10 reasons why you started in the first place and stick it on your bathroom mirror so you see it every morning. Remember them every day as you move forward.
  • Jezebel9
    Jezebel9 Posts: 396 Member
    It's ok to honor your feelings, even if it is self pity. We become very sick in many ways by not allowing ourselves to feel our true feelings as they arise. So, if you feel sad, self pity or any feeling- go ahead and feel it and totally express it. Many people are overweight because they cannot or do not express their feelings.
    And when that is over, you can assess things and figure out your next move.
    The key is to not stay in this mode for a long time, to pick yourself back up, put one foot in front of the other one and keep on keeping on.
    Someone is always going to be better, more, etc than you- so when comparing- use your own self as the thing you are comparing against. Take a deep breath and be fair to yourself. Don't quit.
  • sugiravi
    sugiravi Posts: 48
    I've felt all those things too! Comparing your weight loss to someone else's is just something you do unthinkingly, but when it's your own sister... well it stings a little more if you can't keep up. You think you'd be on a level playing ground genetically speaking, but that's not always true. My sister and I started losing weight at the same time and she's so far ahead of me I quit trying to keep up and just did things my own way. There's always going to be someone doing better than you, but the opposite is also true. Think back to what you accomplished when you lost all that weight-- YOU did that all on your own. So do it again, for yourself and not for anyone else. You already know it's possible :D
  • Michelle650
    Michelle650 Posts: 218
    I've felt all those things too! Comparing your weight loss to someone else's is just something you do unthinkingly, but when it's your own sister... well it stings a little more if you can't keep up. You think you'd be on a level playing ground genetically speaking, but that's not always true. My sister and I started losing weight at the same time and she's so far ahead of me I quit trying to keep up and just did things my own way. There's always going to be someone doing better than you, but the opposite is also true. Think back to what you accomplished when you lost all that weight-- YOU did that all on your own. So do it again, for yourself and not for anyone else. You already know it's possible :D

    Thank you so much for this!! I really appreciate it! I know I compare myself to her alot, but I really am happy for her!!


    And for some of the people saying im not looking at the longterm benefits and just short term, believe me i am! I dont want to get any illness which I could have prevented, weight related or not! Thats why im trying now to nip it in the bud!! I just need to kick myself in the *kitten* to kick start it again!
  • SexyCook
    SexyCook Posts: 2,249 Member
    My michelle....sweetie more than anything you have to dig within and find the missing piece...True we feed off others energy but you must go to the drawing board and find that drive and the discipline you had...What changed with you..is it the eating or exercise...or just the energy? What ever it is I believe you can have what your heart desires...Just believe in yourself and don't look from the. Old journey look at it as total new goals and things to achieve...if you need any help let me know...I cherish my sweet pal....

    Xoxo
    Steph
  • Michelle650
    Michelle650 Posts: 218
    Thanks steph, your words were really touching. Hopefully all this feedback will make me.realise that I can achieve my goals.
  • Michelle650
    Michelle650 Posts: 218
    Check out this post. She gained 1 pound but check out the difference. If you're working out, you can't always depend on the scale.
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/580019-the-scale-is-a-lying-torture-device-i-m-proof?hl=scale+devil

    This is so true. We get so hung up on the scales sometimes! Thanks for this!
This discussion has been closed.

Categories