creepy guy at the gym

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marydee72
marydee72 Posts: 51
in Motivation and Support
There is a fellow at the gym who I am sure is harmless, but he seems to be there to socialize more than to workout. He chats everytime he sees me and now he has started to touch my arm or my back.

I don't mind saying hello and being friendly, but when my workout is being interrupted by an extended conversation, I find it extremely annoying.

And please, don't touch me if you don't know me.....I mean, really.

Anyone else have/had similar issues? Any suggestions? I keep my eyes down, I am focused on what I am doing. I don't look to catch his, or anyone else's eye.

I actually left the gym one day because I didn't want to have to talk to him.

:(
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Replies

  • sisierra
    sisierra Posts: 707 Member
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    I'd say be blunt and straight forward with him. Tell him that while its a pleasure talking to him, but you are at the gym to work out, not to make new friends. Sometimes you just have to be rude to make people get the message
  • DaveC29
    DaveC29 Posts: 232 Member
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    Damn! You are on to me again?!

    I always have my headphones on when working out alone... music turned up, everyone else tuned out and ignore the creepers!
  • ccmandel
    ccmandel Posts: 143 Member
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    Creepy indeed ! I'd say something...so long as people are around....this is NOT ok.

    "cc"
  • lil_pulp
    lil_pulp Posts: 701 Member
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    You could try wearing headphones (even if you're not listening to anything)....maybe he'd get the message that you're not interested in flirting. Just a thought...
  • mallory3411
    mallory3411 Posts: 839 Member
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    Seems a bit creepy.

    Do you have an MP3 player to listen to? Maybe wearing headphones would discourage him from talking to you.

    Can you go at a different time? If you can switch up the times you go and not go the same time each day maybe you won't run into him.

    If it is too much it might be a good idea to let the gym know. You can leave the manager a note with the information and what he looks like/time he was there if you don't want them to know who mentioned it.
  • marydee72
    marydee72 Posts: 51
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    Oh I wear headphones......music up full tilt.
    he just taps me on the shoulder.

    ugh
  • grannygethealthy1111
    grannygethealthy1111 Posts: 422
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    Make yourself VERY clear ... tell him to keep his frigging hands off you. Say it loud and clear and he will get the message.
  • myogibbs
    myogibbs Posts: 182
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    Damn! You are on to me again?!

    I always have my headphones on when working out alone... music turned up, everyone else tuned out and ignore the creepers!

    I was gonna say this. I have my headphones on b/c I am very focused on my workout...plus, it keeps me from talking(& having to listen) to others...especially when I don't want to socalize...
  • StarvingDiva
    StarvingDiva Posts: 1,107 Member
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    When you see him coming wave and put in your earphones and turn up the music really loud so you drown out his mumblings.

    After reading, you should definitely speak up, I'd just say, it's really nice to meet you but you are trying to focus on your workout and talking is distracting to you, can you chat with him later on and just make sure you aren't around later on. HAHA!
  • myogibbs
    myogibbs Posts: 182
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    Oh I wear headphones......music up full tilt.
    he just taps me on the shoulder.

    ugh

    Ugh....can you ask a staff member at the gym to talk to him about interrupting others' work outs? If not, you are just gonna have to be firm with him and tell him that you are there to work out not to socialize....
  • rjmwx81
    rjmwx81 Posts: 259 Member
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    Drop a weight on his foot. Act like it was an accident because he startled you. That ought to take care of it.
  • StarvingDiva
    StarvingDiva Posts: 1,107 Member
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    Drop a weight on his foot. Act like it was an accident because he startled you. That ought to take care of it.

    THIS ^^^^
  • Hraggle
    Hraggle Posts: 2
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    Of course, any woman that's in public is considered public property and any man can just walk up and touch her.

    I think I'd make it clear how he's making you feel. He may just be innocent, and might get offended, but if he's decent then he can respect your personal boundaries. There are enough deterrents from working out, you don't need any kind of additions to that arm-length list.

    I don't think that you should come down too hard on him, he may think you're interested in him simply because you're talking to him.
  • ashley67203
    ashley67203 Posts: 95
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    Does he do it to other people or just you? If he spreads the "love" around I'd report him to management. They won't want him around scaring away the paying customers. They could give him a warning and he wouldn't know who made the complaint. He sounds like some kind of perv trolling for gym ladies.

    If he just does it to you and can't take a clear hint to go away I'd be rude and just ignore him, grade school style. He's making things uncomfortable for you so you might as well return the favor.
  • Athena98501
    Athena98501 Posts: 716 Member
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    There is a fellow at the gym who I am sure is harmless, but he seems to be there to socialize more than to workout. He chats everytime he sees me and now he has started to touch my arm or my back.

    I don't mind saying hello and being friendly, but when my workout is being interrupted by an extended conversation, I find it extremely annoying.

    And please, don't touch me if you don't know me.....I mean, really.

    Anyone else have/had similar issues? Any suggestions? I keep my eyes down, I am focused on what I am doing. I don't look to catch his, or anyone else's eye.

    I actually left the gym one day because I didn't want to have to talk to him.

    :(


    I don't think I'd be so quick to assume he's harmless. Too many women dismiss their instinctive leanings for fear of appearing rude. It sounds to me like you feel that way for good reason. He's dismissing what he reads in your body language, and invading your personal space. I would tell him "No offense, but I'm not here to socialize." He might walk away calling you a b*tch under his breath, but you're entitled to your space, and to stand up for yourself.
  • RoanneRed
    RoanneRed Posts: 429 Member
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    To start with I'd simply say 'you'll have to excuse me but I need to keep moving with my workout' then put the headphones back in. The touching is a challenge and you may just have to tell him outright that you're not comfortable with it.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
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    A short, sharp and succinct "I'm busy." tends to clear up most of these problems. It may seem rude, but that is the only way to get through to some people.
  • thelandofwin
    thelandofwin Posts: 79
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    This happened to me today, but it was a first conversation and no touching. I was finishing up on the treadmill when I was approached. I also had headphones and music blasting, so that doesn't stop everyone. If I am not interested, I will keep my answers very short, don't ask follow up questions, smile, finish the conversation on a strong point, put your headphones back in and walk off.
  • momma_a
    momma_a Posts: 117 Member
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    If it were me, I'd eat some food that makes me really gassy & then fart on him.
  • KC4800
    KC4800 Posts: 140 Member
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    Make yourself VERY clear ... tell him to keep his frigging hands off you. Say it loud and clear and he will get the message.

    This. Be blunt. Some people are clueless. You pay for the gym, your time is valuable.

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