How can I get my Hubby on board?

my husband is the same way. stubborn they are. im with her ^ im hoping he'll join as soon as he starts seing my weight loss efforts and changes.

trying also, but he has to want it, i can't want it enough for him. he is even signed up here and not using it.

Step 1.) DO NOT FORCE/MENTION/SUGGEST THAT HE USE MFP OR LOSE WEIGHT
dear god please do not do this. This will cause resentment, anger, and will be extremely counterproductive.

Step 2.) DO NOT MAKE ANY COMMENTS ON "JUST HOW GREAT I'M LOOKING"
This will cause him to be self concious or believe you are putting him down to put yourself up.

Step 3.) Continue on your journey and do your thing.

Step 4.) Wait for him to realize that you are having phenomenal results. Wait for him to tell you how sexy you are looking. Wait for him to make the decision to change his lifestyle on his own. Wait for him to get motivation from within.


Step 5.) Success?

If he ever wants to be succesful he needs to want to do it wholeheartedly and it needs to be his own choice. If he does it for you, or because he feels bad about himself, he will only fail. Trust me, works every time.

Edit to say: this might take months and months, hell, maybe it will never happen. But trust me, lead by example and he might just follow. Always be positive and support your partner with love and let them do these things on their own accord.

Sometimes you just have to wait until he sees how awesome you have done and then decides to join you. It took mine almost 9 months to start using his own MFP account and now he's down 40 pounds

My husband is the same. I don't stop him eating crap though. They have to want to do it for themselves. When he see's you losing weight he might start to join in.

I explained how important it was to me to lose weight and tried to get my husband to join in initially. However, when I saw he really wasn't motivated I backed off. When I cook dinner, I make it healthy and the same for everyone including him and my kids. Also, I asked him to please not tell me what good food he ate while he was at work and not to bring any unhealthy foods home. Every so often, he will comment on how much I have lost and how he is going to "get serious" about losing weight soon. Btw, he has lost about 11 lbs. just from the healthier dinners.

My boyfriend doesn't look like he needs to lose weight, but he has a lot of unhealthy habits.

I've noticed that as I have been seeing results, he's started paying more attention to what he eats (especially cutting back on soda). I also tend to share a lot of info with him about what I'm doing, and that seems to motivate him a bit as well (perhaps this is more of a male ego thing.. haha.. if he hears about his gf running a few miles, I think it makes him want to do the same or more :P) He still doesn't track his food or anything like that, but he says things like "Wow, that milkshake is 600 calories... I don't think I should have that today"

Some else posted a great idea -- suggest fun and active things to do together! Bike rides are fun and good exercise, though, at least for me, not as tiresome as other forms of exercise. Hiking can also be fun. Or, if you're a sports person -- join a rec adult sports league together! We have a great time playing sports together (and are also burning calories and even meeting a lot of new friends)

Good luck!

Rainbowbow - I have said nothing for the past 5 years!! This year he decided he wanted to do something about his weight - I was very excited and he lasted a week - he ate healthy - wasn't hungry exercised 10 minutes a day and lost 11 lbs - we was walking around like a proud peacock! I was SOOOO excited. The following week he got a cold and gained 7 lbs back and never tried again - he says he gets enough exercise at work. He walks up the stairs and is non-stop huffing and puffing - really sucks to watch - but......I will continue to wait......

Don't try anymore. If he's not interested, you can't make him be into it.


You could always think outloud around him about who your next man will be after your current husband has ate himself into the grave. That's a bit mean-spirited though.

My hubby isnt in bad shape. He works all day on his feet & he used to wrestle, so he's mostly muscle. But I make him eat what I eat lol I let him get chips & sometimes cookies, but I dont like him get anything that would b to temptin to me. And like I said, he eats healthy suppers, cuz he eats what I eat. He's lost weight too, w/o even tryin or counting lol. So my advice is just fix healthy meals, so he will have no choice what to eat haha

My hubby is the same.......... and we have a friend that's a manager at a gym ......... and he can go for free............. I've decided to let him be.... I cook healty and he eats what I cook...... when he cooks he prepares food without the excess calories..... He is trying to help me... and inadvertantly helping himself. ) Also I figured if I lose the weight and look better....maybe he'll eventually do the same.......

My DH complains about his weight and keeps saying, "I have to do something" but then never does. His job has a friggin awesome gym right on site. He could so easily hit it up after work. Even 30 minutes would be good but he won't do it. I want to join the YMCA, mainly because of their pool - I love to swim. I say, join with me. Then he says no because it's silly to pay for a membership when he can use his work gym for free. AGH!

Then, if he ever does get a bit of motivation to do it, he always wants to go with meal programs like NutriSystem. Which, OK, they've helped a lot of people but they don't teach you how to eat and make the lifestyle changes you need. Plus, he already is on meds for high blood pressure, the last thing he needs is a sodium packed diet from prepackaged meal plans. We did NS a few years ago and I lost 35 lbs and he about 45 but it came right back on as soon as we quit. I'm tired of the "diets." It's about changing life and making it better for yourself; losing the weight is an added bonus but any time he talks about losing weight it always revolves around ordering some program meals. And then he never actually does that either.

Or, he'll go to make something "healthy" for dinner like a chicken breast and some steamed veggies but he cooks the chicken in oil, adds butter to the veggies, etc. Sometimes it's just impossible. But, it all comes down to it has to be HIS decision. HE has to ready for it. As much as we'd love for them to have the motivation in the power of 2 or as much as we'd love to see them do it for health, longevity, and all the other reasons - we simply can't make them. Occasionally I can get him to come with me on a walk or go for the random swim here and there and I take the small wins when I can get them and try to make the most of that time by encouraging him but, you simply can't force someone to do something they really don't have the heart for.

I think this is like anything else. Quitting smoking, whatever, it has to be THEIR idea! they have to be able to produce the drive for this goal. I suggest you keep doing what you're doing, and maybe it'll click for him one day.

bjohs - I cant wait to try this with my husband. He still has a nice body, but since his MS has taken away his ability to do any walking or running, his muscles have decreased and his tummy has increased. He could stand to lose 30lbs. :huh: He has terrible habits that 40 years of the 'perfect' body has allowed him to get away with. Age and disease are now working against him. However, there is always diet and the 'perfect' motivator to help him maintain that sexiness as long as humanly possible. :smooched: Can't wait to see if this motivates him. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

Well speaking from the male side of the equation, I can tell you after a decade of shunning everyone in my family and turning to food for my comfort and getting to 560 lbs. and on the verge of death, there was Absolutely Nothing my wife or family could have said to me to get me to change my mind until I decided it was time and I am fortunate that I finally had the aha moment b4 my untimely death.. The thing is he has to want this for himself and the very best thing you can do is lead by example. The biggest thing that I noticed was my family moving on without me... When I seen everyone living there lives and I was the one sitting alone in the living room at thanksgiving in 08 and again at christmas that was the beginning of my wake up call... My family never stopped loving me but had resided to the fact I was going to kill myself with food and there was nothing they could do but love me from a far... It didn't take me long after that to see what was going on.... Oh they tried for the better half of a decade with interventions and what not but that just pissed me off everytime they came at me with "you need to lose weight" etc , etc...... It had the opposite effect until I was ready to face those demons... Now that I am on the other side I see some of those same family members heading down that same road I was traveling and as much as it KILLS ME to see this after they watched what I went through the last 3 years to regain control of my life, I know deep down there is nothing I can do but "Lead by Example" and hope they see the benefits of what I have done before it is to late for them.... Best of Luck....

bjohs - won't work for mine

Bummer. But maybe my idea will help spark some creative ideas of your own?