Emotional Eating/Binge Eating
TurnLeftNow
Posts: 171
So I have been dealing with some emotional eating for the last few months. I feel overwhelmed with everything. I have a lot of different mental "issues" and thoughts going back in forth that are causing me to over eat every day. It has been too long, and I want to get a hold of this before I gain ALL the weight back, but I don't know how to do it alone. The thoughts of food are so intense, the anxiety is so intense. It is worse now because there was a point where I sent A LOT of my chocolate to my mom so it wouldn't me in my apartment. I had to move back in with her (a few months after I sent the chocolate) and it is ALL STILL HERE. I am upset with her that she didn't eat any of it. And I have been chowing down on it ever since I got back. It's here and it is in the house and there is nothing I can do about it.
I want to know, for those of who you were/are binge eaters or emotional eaters... how did you over come it? How did you get passed the temptations? Is it just about not doing it? Choosing not to? Is that all I can do is just suffer through it?
I drink a lot of water and all the tips and tricks that people list about eating small meals or going for a walk, chewing gum, or chugging a glass of water... it doesn't help. Waiting doesn't help. It just is so intense. So are there any other tips other than those? Anything that helped you get passed it?
Thanks.
I want to know, for those of who you were/are binge eaters or emotional eaters... how did you over come it? How did you get passed the temptations? Is it just about not doing it? Choosing not to? Is that all I can do is just suffer through it?
I drink a lot of water and all the tips and tricks that people list about eating small meals or going for a walk, chewing gum, or chugging a glass of water... it doesn't help. Waiting doesn't help. It just is so intense. So are there any other tips other than those? Anything that helped you get passed it?
Thanks.
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Replies
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I would throw it out. Every time you feel like emotionally eating. i would turn on the kettle. Have a green tea or herbal tea. But this kind of this should really be taken to a counsellor and/or dietitian.0
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I don't have any tips for getting rid of it as I am still struggling. I am currently struggling with depression (I am stationed in San Antonio, hubby is in Norfolk, VA) and my fall back is to eat food that I cook that I like. It's like the one thing I can do right when everything is going wrong.
First thing I would say is to get the chocolate out of the house - don't eat it!!
Talk with your mom and/or someone you trust who can help you. Your mom might not realize what's going on and will probably be able to help you out if she knows.0 -
I wouldn't feel right with just throwing it away. I am one of those people that hates wasting food. I don't even really know where it came from, but I can't stand the thought of throwing out food... I feel sooooo guilty. I have already talked with her about it being hard not to eat all of the chocolate and so she has taken a lot to work and I have given a lot to friends. But I still feel really guilty about spending all that money and then just giving it away. Part of it is really difficult too, because it makes me feel really scared and depressed to give it away; like once it is gone my security blanket isn't there anymore. It makes me sad that I have to give it away because I can't eat a normal portion of it. It is dumb because it is *just* food, but yet it has so much emotional control over me.0
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I wouldn't feel right with just throwing it away. I am one of those people that hates wasting food. I don't even really know where it came from, but I can't stand the thought of throwing out food... I feel sooooo guilty. I have already talked with her about it being hard not to eat all of the chocolate and so she has taken a lot to work and I have given a lot to friends. But I still feel really guilty about spending all that money and then just giving it away. Part of it is really difficult too, because it makes me feel really scared and depressed to give it away; like once it is gone my security blanket isn't there anymore. It makes me sad that I have to give it away because I can't eat a normal portion of it. It is dumb because it is *just* food, but yet it has so much emotional control over me.
so don't use your body like a bin for food just because you don't want to waste food.
just don't have it in the house and don't buy any when you are out. start eating clean. you are stronger than chocolate. stop thinking of it as a security blanket - as there is nothing secure about eat f--loads of high calorie high sugar chocolate that will give you a sugar dip and make you crave more.
you need to step up and just get on with it.0 -
I often eat more when I'm feeling bored or sad and a lot of the tips you mentioned usually help. It sounds like you have a lot of anxiety in general and around food in particular so perhaps counselling would help.0
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I would throw it out. Every time you feel like emotionally eating. i would turn on the kettle. Have a green tea or herbal tea. But this kind of this should really be taken to a counsellor and/or dietitian.0
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I wouldn't feel right with just throwing it away. I am one of those people that hates wasting food.I can't stand the thought of throwing out food... I feel sooooo guiltyBut I still feel really guilty about spending all that money and then just giving it awayit makes me feel really scared and depressed to give it away
"so much emotional control over me"
you arnt kidding, you are living in fear of food, its like an abusive husband, you wouldnt keep him around, you'd "bin" him
get that food in the bin, or give it to a charity store (they might give you a weird look but bah) or knock on your neigbours door and hand it over
you may feel guilty etc.. whatever but it will pass, but then you can start a new relationship with new food, grab some mushrooms, some peppers, keep a good shelf of spices and experiment and put YOU in control, not the food
you shouldnt fear your food, unless your on the T-rex and velocoraptor diet, then you are perfectly ok to fear your food
^_^0 -
Therapy has been amazingly helpful to me in terms of discovering exactly *why* I binged. (It was not simply bad habits, lack of willpower, and/or anxiety, which is what I'd been attributing it to for years.) After we figured out why I binged, my relationship with food is changing and I am starting to feel like I'm eating "like a normal person" (i.e., I still might overeat sometimes, but it's not with that crazy and out-of-control intensity).
I agree with others that giving the chocolate away is okay. It sounds like right now if it's in the house, you're going to eat it. If you don't want to eat it (and you don't!), get rid of it.
Good luck. This is hard stuff!0 -
I'm going to disagree with some of the replies here (sorry people!). Don't try to stop it completely - you won't be able to anyway probably until you sort out the REASONS you're doing it.
Next time you want to eat the chocolate think about how you feel. What is making you feel this way? What are you thinking? It's your thoughts and feelings that are making you turn to food. This isn't bad or wrong - in fact it's perfectly normal behaviour! Food is your coping mechanism for the problems you have. Don't worry too much about eating at the moment - try to sort out your problems and then food will get back back into the right place in your life.
In the meantime make sure you're eating healthy meals, try to relax and do lots of inner searching. Be gentle on yourself and forgive yourself...
:-)0 -
so don't use your body like a bin for food just because you don't want to waste food.
just don't have it in the house and don't buy any when you are out. start eating clean. you are stronger than chocolate. stop thinking of it as a security blanket - as there is nothing secure about eat f--loads of high calorie high sugar chocolate that will give you a sugar dip and make you crave more.
you need to step up and just get on with it.
Kinda rough, but ya. You really do need to take some control. Getting rid of the foods that are problems for you isn' t wasting food it's taking control. If those things aren't there for a crutch, you'll have to find other ways to deal with stress. Try getting out of the house when you feel the urge. Maybe some therapy. Do something social or healthy like joining a yoga class, swim aerobics, join an art class. Do something that makes you feel good about you, lets you feel positive and in control of something.
I'm an stress eater. I cope best when I make sure to do "me" things. A long walk when things are bad, time in the yard (I planted a nice garden this week)... something that makes me feel successful and gets me away from it all does a lot. Luv me some bubble bath!
Hope you find something that works for you.0 -
I am a emotional eater and also struggle!
I find having low fat treats in this helps so I don't feel like I'm missing out. If my partners eating something something for pudding or supper I can still have something.
Reading helps me about people who are doing well and losing weightit makes me want to do well like they are doing or TV programmes such as 'the biggest loser'
I also look at photos of times when I was happier with myself and this often helps to steer me away.
There are going to be times when you will not be strong. last night I ate much more pasta than I was supposed to because I was feeling miserable and really wanted to dig into some yummy chcocolate desert that was in the fridge but instead I came on here. I felt much more motivated after having some friendly advice on here and went for a walk to help walk off the pasta instead of feeling sorry for myself and eating the pud.0 -
I think emotional eating is something so many of us struggle with at one time or another. I find when I'm extremely stressed, I'll reach into the cabinet without being conscience of doing it. If I'm eating a meal when stressed, I eat it so quickly that I have no memory of eating at all. Regarding the chocolate, why not try wrapping it up in many layers of plastic wrap. If you're tempted to eat it, you'll have to work through the layers to get to it and it will give you time to gain control. You can also freeze chocolate and that will add an extra layer of protection against a binge. In the meatime, have healthy binge foods ready to eat all the time. Have a bowl of carrots or celery washed, cut and ready in the refrigerator. It may help.0
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You say you would feel guilty throwing it out but you feel guilty eating it. Which guilt is deeper? Which will you feel good about tomorrow?
I am struggling with comfort eating right now too. Out of control.
What my plan is (starting today) - log foods for the next day the night before. I logged today last night, leaving room for more and watching macros somewhat - at first I was negative in sugar. I included popcorn for a snack. Snacks are good - they stop binges. I am grocery shopping today and picking up 100cal popcorn packs. I would normally make a bag and split it - but right now I would eat it all!0 -
Ive just bought a book called "Making Peace with Food". So far so good. It's not a diet book, it's about emotional attachment to food and the reasons for chronic dieting, bingeing, and alsorts of ED's. Some parts are a little bit scary but it all seems to make sense (so far) Maybe give that a go....that's what Im doing. I think back to the times in my life when I was at my slimmest, and each and every time was when I wasn't dieting or thinking about food too much, nothing was off limits, food was there to satisfy my hunger and keep me alive....oh how I long to be back in that place. Good luck xx0
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The main things that have helped me are things I've learned from listening to Pema Chodron (a Budhist nun who has several cds about coping).
1) Work with what you can. When you get that craving think to yourself 'am I strong enough to risist this today' and really challenge the idea of whether you are truely strong enough or not. If not, have it but don't feel guilty. the more you do this, the stronger you'll get and the more times you can say not to food.
2) Be gentle on yourself. Beating yourself and getting worked up will only make you worse. try to build some time into your day for relaxing. Mindfulness breathing and meditation are useful for this but again, don't expect to be good at it right away, it takes practice.
3) Do you really what what your craving or could you substitue a healthier option so you still get to eat but don't blow your day. Ie a banana instead of chocolate.
Hope that helps
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You could always message me for tips if you want. If you have done it... most likely I have too. I am going to an eating disorder treatment center for it and bulimia nervosa symptoms in a couple days and its scary but I'm so hopeful that this demon can be conquered and destroyed that is binge eating and disordered eating in general.
Good luck and don't lose hope and never, ever give up on yourself.0 -
I wouldn't feel right with just throwing it away. I am one of those people that hates wasting food. I don't even really know where it came from, but I can't stand the thought of throwing out food... I feel sooooo guilty. I have already talked with her about it being hard not to eat all of the chocolate and so she has taken a lot to work and I have given a lot to friends. But I still feel really guilty about spending all that money and then just giving it away. Part of it is really difficult too, because it makes me feel really scared and depressed to give it away; like once it is gone my security blanket isn't there anymore. It makes me sad that I have to give it away because I can't eat a normal portion of it. It is dumb because it is *just* food, but yet it has so much emotional control over me.
What you're doing is sooo hard keeping it all in the house it's the equivilent of trying to quit smoking but having a 200 carton of cigarettes in the cupboard, trust me get rid of it all and don't buy anymore whether it's giving it away (take it into your work, school, evening class and just tell people what they don't take will be binned) or binning it and pouring a can of coke on top after you've binned it and taking it to where you're bin men collect it outside (so you don't fish it back out)
However it's really hard to go from that to pure clean eating, what I did was get some iced lolly pops in to eat. Dunno what you have where you live but I get Walls mini milks, walls mini twisters and mini fruit pastill lollies to get my sweet fix (only buying one box at a time so I can't go too mad if I have more than one lolly), ice lollies take a few minutes to eat so you usually get over your craving after one and the ones I listed are less then 50 cals a pop
However the main thing may be trying to break the emotional cycle of binge eating and avoid times/places when you binge, so if it's at home get out of the house but def try to speak to someone about it, Good luck and take care. x0 -
I am a binge eater so I know what you are going through. I am fighting the battle now on and off again. So far I have had to just stop myself, constantly tell myself no... and so on. Let me give it more thought, I was heading to bed when I saw this.I would love to be friends and see if we can overcome this together.0
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I didn't realise my binge eating was out of control until one day I was out shopping with hubby and kids and I managed to buy a chocolate bar & eat it without the hubby noticing and I FELT PROUD that i'd accomplished this. I always knew I had a problem cause I used to hide in the bathroom or in the kitchen and eat something really quick before anyone noticed, but when I felt proud about the chocolate bar, I think that was a real wake up call for me.
I've been a binge eater for nearly all of my life. Since I've joined MFP I've only binged twice, I'm proud to say. It's just as much an emotional thing as a physical thing. You need to take it HOUR by HOUR, and then day by day and so on.... It WILL be VERY hard at first, and I didn't beleive it myself, but it will get better in time. You'll be able to control yourself just that little bit more. Remember you've been doing this for a very long time, don't consider a bad day as a failure, just a little slip up and get yourself back on track. I still have problems the week before my cycle with the sweet (chocolate) cravings, but I don't deny myself anything, I just take it in proper serving sizes now. I find denying yourself makes things even worse, to a point that when you do finally have what you want you 'pig out'. Let yourself have little bits, just enough to satisfy your 'need'.
It will get better, I promise. As long as you're positive, and determined you will get there.
I'd be more than happy to be your friend and help support you, one binger to another0 -
I want to know, for those of who you were/are binge eaters or emotional eaters... how did you over come it? How did you get passed the temptations? Is it just about not doing it? Choosing not to? Is that all I can do is just suffer through it?
I drink a lot of water and all the tips and tricks that people list about eating small meals or going for a walk, chewing gum, or chugging a glass of water... it doesn't help. Waiting doesn't help. It just is so intense. So are there any other tips other than those? Anything that helped you get passed it?
Thanks.
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I think the Paul McKenna "I can make you thin" book is quite good. It comes with a DVD, Hypnosis CD and a 90 day diary log in addition. Its all about reprogramming your mind so you work on the route causes of your overeating and I found it is helping me, though I have just started it. I'm from UK but i'm sure you can get this online.
I have also started to walk to work and back instead of public transport, I find that helps keep me on a positive frame of mind and stops me from slipping into eating out of boredom.
Good Luck, listen to your body and do what works for you.0 -
Thanks everyone for your replies and your words of encouragement. A lot of what you say makes sense, and I know that logically it should be enough to get me to finally make the change.
As far as feeling more guilty for throwing the chocolate away or more guilty for eating it... I definitely feel loads more guilty for throwing it away. I will obsess about it for days and days and weeks if I throw it away. I will feel bad and guilty for weeks. But if I eat it, even if I over eat it... I care and I feel bad but not AS bad. I like eating the chocolate, I like not stopping at one... it is "fun" and enjoyable it is the only "happiness" I have, even if I feel bad that eating so much is embarrassing and shameful.
As far as eating clean goes, I am not sure if that will work for me. I did it once in the past and I went an entire year eating fairly clean (no fast food, no sweets, no chocolate, no chips etc) and yeah... that did not end well. I had one piece of chocolate once and I binged for months and gained so much weight. Thinking about that time, it was not a good time in my life at all... it was terrible. I restricted a lot of foods and I don't want to end up back in that area... and I know once I start cutting foods out I am going to end up doing it again. Or that is my fear. I have too many good memories and positive associations involved with dessert type foods that I can't imagine my life without them. I know that eventually I probably need to get rid of them because they are trigger foods... however right now, I think that is too much to handle alone. Although the tricky part about that is... well the binge eating.
I would love love love to get therapy, but I don't have enough money for it. I have been starting to see if I can find places that offer cheap prices or for free but so far it hasn't been working out.
The whole switching a fruit out for chocolate thing doesn't work for me anymore. I eat the banana and then I end up eating a yogurt, drink 4-5 glasses of water and still end up going for the chocolate. *sigh*.
It is ridiculous to think that throwing out the trigger foods or not buying them anymore would be hard. You think I'd do it right away. But yeah, I could ramble on more and more but I won't.
Thanks for listening and thanks for giving advice. I appreciate the support.0 -
I began seeing a therapist, i needed support. I also set more reasonable, smaller goals and worked towards them. Take a day off, go do something good for your self and realize how important and beautiful that you are!0
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Thanks everyone for your replies and your words of encouragement. A lot of what you say makes sense, and I know that logically it should be enough to get me to finally make the change.
As far as feeling more guilty for throwing the chocolate away or more guilty for eating it... I definitely feel loads more guilty for throwing it away. I will obsess about it for days and days and weeks if I throw it away. I will feel bad and guilty for weeks. But if I eat it, even if I over eat it... I care and I feel bad but not AS bad. I like eating the chocolate, I like not stopping at one... it is "fun" and enjoyable it is the only "happiness" I have, even if I feel bad that eating so much is embarrassing and shameful.
As far as eating clean goes, I am not sure if that will work for me. I did it once in the past and I went an entire year eating fairly clean (no fast food, no sweets, no chocolate, no chips etc) and yeah... that did not end well. I had one piece of chocolate once and I binged for months and gained so much weight. Thinking about that time, it was not a good time in my life at all... it was terrible. I restricted a lot of foods and I don't want to end up back in that area... and I know once I start cutting foods out I am going to end up doing it again. Or that is my fear. I have too many good memories and positive associations involved with dessert type foods that I can't imagine my life without them. I know that eventually I probably need to get rid of them because they are trigger foods... however right now, I think that is too much to handle alone. Although the tricky part about that is... well the binge eating.
I would love love love to get therapy, but I don't have enough money for it. I have been starting to see if I can find places that offer cheap prices or for free but so far it hasn't been working out.
The whole switching a fruit out for chocolate thing doesn't work for me anymore. I eat the banana and then I end up eating a yogurt, drink 4-5 glasses of water and still end up going for the chocolate. *sigh*.
It is ridiculous to think that throwing out the trigger foods or not buying them anymore would be hard. You think I'd do it right away. But yeah, I could ramble on more and more but I won't.
Thanks for listening and thanks for giving advice. I appreciate the support.0 -
Hey there,
I could easily write what you have written and understand the bizarre connection/prison of food. I havent beaten it yet, but am on the road to recovery & feel stronger than ever. I am going to a group, called celebrate recovery, that has given me some TREMENDOUS tools to fight this daily battle with mind/emotion/food. And as I uncover some things about myself and begin to learn the 'whys', I have begun to gain control. The group is free, and is a Christian group. I'd be glad to share more info if you're interested.
Ironically, I am new to MFP, and was just browsing looking for things I might relate to. Glad I found your post. Msg me or add me as a friend if you like.
Hope today is a good day for you. Mine is off to a good start. :-)0 -
I can totally relate to what you're saying Kim. I've been a binge/emotional eater most of my life and have only recently shared that side of myself with my husband. In the past fifteen years I've put on 40 pounds. I'm finally dealing with it head on and being honest with him. He asked me when I overeat/binge because he never sees it. All I told him was when I am alone...it's unbelievable how much food I can put away when he's in the shower for ten minutes...or when I get home from work and he's not there yet. Or when I'm driving home from the grocery store...I ate an entire package of cookies on my way home one day.
I cannot do this on my own. I'm seeing a fantastic Christian counselor and am strengthing my relationship with God. The closer I get to Him, the less powerful my cravings are.
But it is definitely one day at a time, sometimes one minute at a time. I'm sitting here right now, an hour before leaving work and I have to stop at the grocery store, and I'm thinking about my favorite cookies again. I've been binge free for two days now, and am praying I get through a third.0 -
Eunie,
Way to go on the 2 day victory!!! I know you can make it through that 3rd day!
I too, only recently shared my struggle with my husband. It's no secret I've gained weight, but I don't think he realized exactly what I was doing. I've sat in my car many a day eating and 'sneaking' food. ridiculous amounts of ridiculous food. THe grocery store is the worst. So much temptation and opportunity there. I could go on and on. Ive even eaten an entire meal at one restaurant and then went to antoher for dessert. Unreal.
And like you, I am depending on God and am in a group to battle this fight that I'm in. I've battled it my whole life abd realize I cannot win this struggle myself, but know that with God, I can conquer anything. I also found an accountability partner, who is truly helping me. I have someone to answer to now, and even though I never thought that would make a difference bc i thoguht I'd just lie, I have found the strength to tell the truth and know that has to happen to move forward. I won't let my emotional overeating/binging/food issue to be a prison for me any longer.
I'd love to be a source of encouragement to either of you girls, or to anyone reading this who might ned it.
Thanks for shairng. :-)0 -
I'm going to disagree with some of the replies here (sorry people!). Don't try to stop it completely - you won't be able to anyway probably until you sort out the REASONS you're doing it.
Next time you want to eat the chocolate think about how you feel. What is making you feel this way? What are you thinking? It's your thoughts and feelings that are making you turn to food. This isn't bad or wrong - in fact it's perfectly normal behaviour! Food is your coping mechanism for the problems you have. Don't worry too much about eating at the moment - try to sort out your problems and then food will get back back into the right place in your life.
In the meantime make sure you're eating healthy meals, try to relax and do lots of inner searching. Be gentle on yourself and forgive yourself...
:-)
I agree that you are feeling something and your way to not feel that way is to eat......
I was searching to see if there is an emotional eaters board/group because I need to talk to others who can relate to this!
I have an addictive personality. Over the last two days I have done things that I do when I am having feelings that I don't want to think about. It used to be that I wasn't even aware that I had a feeling. I just started doing my addictive things without any thought at all. Stuffing myself with food helps me not to feel anything....I feel numb actually and sometimes even my lips and tongue take on a numb feeling. Then immediately afterwards I go through a series of self bashing....like hatred of self and tell self what a bad person I am, a loser, etc etc. You get the idea. Which is followed by more addictive behaviors. I am at the point now, thanks to therapy for other addictive things, that I "catch" myself. For example, this weekend I had a phone call that was the trigger. I had a feeling that I immediately pushed out of my mind. (didn't even thing through this) Over the next two days I engaged in my favorite addictive things one of which is food. This led to me feeling like a very bad person. BUT all of a sudden on Sunday night it hit me that I need to talk to someone, hubby and tell him I'm not feeling very good about myself. As I started talking to him, it statrted to come together in my mind what was going on and I could see that it was the feelings from the phone call that started all this.
I hope to get to the point one day of realizing this sooner than 2 days later BUT there is hope! It is ok to feel what you feel.
I hope this helps someone in some way.0 -
I hope you have gotten the emotional eating under control. I too over eat when I am stressed. I go through cycles of craving sweet and salty treats. I buy crisper cracker (to replace my chips)-get the same result with far much less calories. For the sweet attacks I always have on hand sugar free jello (5 calories per cup). I used to fill up on raw vegetables at night but the caused alot of gas so I try to find better snacks that aren't loaded with fats and calories. It's basic will power which is really hard to over power but it is possible and there are bad days but don't get too down about.0
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Find more ways of deriving pleasure from life and living.
Establish a daily routine that is pleasurable and relaxing. This can range from a stroll around a pleasand neighbourhood to simply praying. Don't under estimate the power of prayer... a spiritual reaching out to that which is whole and good for strength and guidance, no matter what may come your way. It works for me...
Learn to switch off all the negative static in your head. Worrying doesn't solve anything. Attack your issues head on and constructively or if you cannot but are simply killing time in the hope your problems will go away then devote only a set time to worrying and spend the rest of the day figuring out ways to enrich your life according to your circumstances. Rediscover the joy of good people. Go to the public library and develop topics of interest and get a better perspective on things in general.
Find something that keeps your hands busy for when you get edgy. Perhaps knitting or crochet.. Or sketching and painting.
Be more generous! Seems hanging on to your chocolate is like hanging on to you issues. Learn to let go. Exhale. Then breath in , then exhale...
Learn to be in the moment. Loose yourself in whatever task you do, be it sweeping the floor or engaging in conversation. Learn to really listen to people, heart to heart. Active listening enriches your life as much as those around you.
Chocolate is addictive. For you it is not your friend. Find true friends and broaden your circle , in everything...0 -
I have been dealing with emotional eating for the entire time I've been losing and maintaining my weight. For me, it's not something that I simple overcame. It's something I deal with on nearly a daily basis. I have also done all the tips and tricks. Occasionally they work, but more times than not, they don't. I found for me, the thing that helps the most is not have the junk/trigger foods in the house and I don't buy them and bring them home. I know, easier said than done...
I've found if I have healthier options to binge on, I still binge, but the calories are much lower. And when I do binge, I track it, forgive myself, and move.
Like I said, I still do a lot of emotional eating, but I've noticed I'm better able to handle it as time goes on and the episodes of binging are becoming less. I think acknowleging you have the problem and asking for help is definitely the step in the right direction.
Just hang in there, keep asking for help, and eventually you will learn a way to deal with it in your own way. Untill then... {{HUGS!!!}} and remember you are not alone. :flowerforyou:0
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