UGH!!!! guys vs. girls

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  • alyblue
    alyblue Posts: 20
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    It's pretty common for guys to lose faster/ more easily, with more calories, 'cos they have higher muscle mass than we do, and hormonal differences aren't kind to us, either. My bf complains about how many calories he has to eat - it's all I can do not to beat him up! *laugh* I go harder, faster, longer in the gym... he burns more. Physiology is cruel. be proud of each other, but mayhap for you it's best not to do head to head that way 'cos it can feel really crummy (I speak from experience!)

    that totally cracks me up. i sit there seething sometimes watching him down 4 mountain dews in a row when waters threatening to turn me into a bowling ball. my husband is very loving and sweet though, and really he's my motivation for doing this!
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
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    It's easy to say "you should be proud of him" but that's not reality. Reality is that when we are struggling with something, it can hurt to see someone have success come easier. So I don't blame you. It's human. But I will caution you... Men will almost always lose weight faster than women. Perhaps it is best if you keep your exact poundage to yourself, if it discourages you that he's losing weight faster? I don't share my weight with my boyfriend. It doesn't matter to anyone else but me what my weight is; all anyone else notices is the change in my body, if it's noticeable enough. I think you should try to be proud of one another (you are BOTH succeeding) and not look at numbers on the scale
  • LindaLouLu
    LindaLouLu Posts: 271 Member
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    MY husband and I go round and round about this. In the very beginning, I was the bigger one. A pound here, MAYBE 2 there were coming off the at the scales. Then it'd be his turn and I pretty much could guarantee he'd double my numbers. Verrrrrry frustrating. Good news is I'm very competitive about things and it's only pushed me to work harder and harder. There are times where I look at his numbers and I hear about the things he eats (he's over seas right now) and I can't figure out how he doesn't weigh 50lbs MORE! Then again, he's a Ectomorph and I'm a Mesomorph, so that right there makes all the difference.
    It might come down to something as simple as your body types too....
    Good luck and try not to hold a grudge :wink: You'll both be smaller in the long run, no matter WHO get's there first. :flowerforyou:
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
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    Here, I'll make you feel better. I have stayed steady for the past month despite getting up early and walking, running, lifting weights and overall getting much more activity than ever. I am also counting calories. It isn't a competition. As you noted, you have some circumstances that make it more difficult to lose already. Be happy for his loss and yours.
  • minime2b
    minime2b Posts: 168
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    Been there. My hubby and I are doing this thing together and early on he seemed to have more success than me. A couple of months in I had a few weeks that were better as he was leveling off. We have both lost about the same amount and we're 5 months in. Just stay focused. Everyones weight loss is different. the important thing is that both of you are making progress and you help keep one anothe motivated. Good luck
  • Nikocan
    Nikocan Posts: 95
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    when we started i weighted about 10lbs more than my husband. im at 5'9 and he's about 5'11. i was at 215 and he was at 205. now he's at 190 and i'm at 209. i am really really proud of him but i guess im frustrated that i can't keep up... i want the same results he's getting! i've also noticed since i've started losing im getting some stretch marks on the insides of my legs. that's pretty defeating feeling as well. you can't really see my weight in my face or shoulders. its all in my stomach and upper thighs. and boobs. holy cow these boobs came out of nowhere!

    I relate..I relate..My husband also has the annoying habit of being able to lose weight without lifting a finger..and when we do our weigh ins..Either we have lost the exact same weight or he has jumped ahead of me..hate it hate it hate it..GRRRR..
  • alyblue
    alyblue Posts: 20
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    thank you... ALL of you for your opinions. we're all over the board but i do feel a lot better. i actually just got annoyed enough to ask him if i could go to his gym class with him a few days a week and he said yeah. the smile on his face made me feel like he was excited i wanted to go since he has never pushed me to. i'm super super competitive so i know i'll try my best to keep up with him on the treadmill. also has anyone done that couch to 5k program? i'd be willing to take it on with a partner if anyone is interested?
  • MMAQueen
    MMAQueen Posts: 279 Member
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    same here! my hubby can drop weight like it's going out of style. and it's not like he's got a tonne to lose, he's 6'0 and about 166. he'll get up to around 170, the decide to drop to 160, and it takes him... a week. it takes me months to do that!
  • michelleepotter
    michelleepotter Posts: 800 Member
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    My husband -- God love him -- eats way worse than I do, exercises way less, and loses way more. Well, maybe not way more, but definitely more. He's lost 16 pounds so far, and I've been stuck at 12 pounds for weeks.

    Don't compare yourself to your husband; it will just make you crazy! Fill up your MFP friends list with women at about the same place on their journey as you, and lose -- slower than the men -- together! :)
  • jenniejengin
    jenniejengin Posts: 785 Member
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    Me and my boyfriend are both working out now (not workout partners, because we are doing different things). I started way b4 him and his progress is so much better than me. I am glad that I was able to encourage him to finally work out. Overeall, he looks so much better. I compliment him all the time now, just to keep him motivated and to keep up the good work. He look better now than when we first met. I have to play catch up and that motivates me.
  • lickmybaconcakes
    lickmybaconcakes Posts: 1,063 Member
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    testes=high testosterone (8 times more than women)= higher metabolic rate.
  • sarahharmintx
    sarahharmintx Posts: 868 Member
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    Yep. I have some of the same issues. Although, I am super proud that he is trying to lose weight. He works outside in the south Texas heat while I have a desk job. I know he is buring more calories bc he is far more active than I am. We were sitting in bed last night talking about having the munchies. He had 800+ calories left and I was 200 in the hole. It happens but I know that he is moving and sweating more than I am during the day.
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
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    thank you... ALL of you for your opinions. we're all over the board but i do feel a lot better. i actually just got annoyed enough to ask him if i could go to his gym class with him a few days a week and he said yeah. the smile on his face made me feel like he was excited i wanted to go since he has never pushed me to. i'm super super competitive so i know i'll try my best to keep up with him on the treadmill. also has anyone done that couch to 5k program? i'd be willing to take it on with a partner if anyone is interested?

    I did C25k and it was fantastic. Okay, I lied... I started C25K and by week 3 I had moved onto another program called Bridge to 10k because I wasn't really starting from "couch" and I figured out pretty early that I can run a 5k without too much difficulty. BUT - the great thing about C25k is that it builds your confidence in your ability faster than it pushes your limits. I really believe that program can work for anyone. You should check out the C25k group here... There are new people starting all the time

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/forums/show/47-couch-to-5k-running-program-c25k-
  • umachanxo
    umachanxo Posts: 926 Member
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    My husband has a very, very high metabolism. He doesn't gain weight. But it doesn't bother me - he encourages me throughout my weight loss.

    Thyroid problems can make weight loss harder. But the fact that you're STILL ON THE WAGON losing weight despite all of those things you could use as excuses, you should be proud of that.

    Instead of competing with your boyfriend, why not encourage each other and be proud of the others achievements.
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
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    Both my fiancee and I dieted to look good for our wedding. She's lost ~20 lbs, and in that time I've lost over 50 and counting. The strict number difference can be depressing along with the fact that I lost a higher percentage, but I started at a much higher weight than she did and I am able to workout more and harder than she can. Frankly, however, even at her heaviest and my lightest, she's the one that looks better naked. I'm winning the little bet we made with each other, she's winning the war.
  • chachita7
    chachita7 Posts: 996 Member
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    Men are Losers, lol... no really they lose weight much faster than woman LMB above explains the why... part of my success is that I eat like a man - yup grab the steak instead of the salad, lift like a man (well not weight wise but not girly girly either)....
  • crobl
    crobl Posts: 380
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    Sometimes it's nice being a guy. We can pee anywhere. We lose weight much easier. We don't have an Uncle TOM. Yep it's good to be a boy.

    Try and not worry about it being a competition. You can only take care of you and what you're doing. Try your best and let that be your guide. Cheer him on when he succeeds and encourage him when he struggles. Hopefully he'll do the same for you. And working together you'll both reach your goals.

    I agree...I wish I could pee anywhere. I mean, I can, just not very well!
  • davessweets
    davessweets Posts: 44
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    Your both doing great. I know its so hard when you feel your are working just as hard as another person..but they are making progress faster. You are both doing great..your bodys are different and will adjust differently. Be proud of him and be proud of you..everyones bodys lose differently..maybe keep track of your inches to..you may see a difference there to.
  • mooglysmom
    mooglysmom Posts: 319 Member
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    Though my husband is overweight, he can easily lose weight. I went gluten free? He's gluten free 80% of the time (except the junk he eats at work where I obviously can't see, lol), and he loses nearly 60lbs. No working out, not making any real changes - just the fact that I cook healthier at home. What do I do? I GAIN 15lbs. Seriously?? It's disgusting, lol!! It sucks, but don't feel defeated. You'll get there, and feel better because of it!
  • davessweets
    davessweets Posts: 44
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    Both my fiancee and I dieted to look good for our wedding. She's lost ~20 lbs, and in that time I've lost over 50 and counting. The strict number difference can be depressing along with the fact that I lost a higher percentage, but I started at a much higher weight than she did and I am able to workout more and harder than she can. Frankly, however, even at her heaviest and my lightest, she's the one that looks better naked. I'm winning the little bet we made with each other, she's winning the war.

    I love this post..makes me so happy to see someone so proud of their significant other no matter what. Love the fact he loves her for who she is!

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