Getting Ahead

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  • sktllmdrhmz
    sktllmdrhmz Posts: 2,073 Member
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    You posted about attractive people and then quoted studies about tall people. Forgive me if I don't follow...

    Intelligent and attractive people would of couse do very well, but that would mostly be due to their intelligence. Looks don't hurt but unless it's specifically a looks based career (acting, modeling, etc.) you just aren't going to get very far based on looks alone. Again they don't hurt, but you need something more to back them up.

    You're right. I should have phrased my original post a little more broadly. The tall people get perceived as better leaders based on their appearance. There's a correlation between their success and their looks, though not necessarily their attractiveness.
  • sktllmdrhmz
    sktllmdrhmz Posts: 2,073 Member
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    They may be taller statistically, but they didn't get there by being tall. That's my point. They got there by being smart, resourceful, and wise. I have no doubt than an average guy who is extremely good at his job and clever enough could be a very successful CEO making a ton of money (and according to those statistics, that's still true). In the end, it matters more what you DO than what you look like if you want to get to the very top in life.

    My field is academia, and I can tell you straight up that most of my colleagues and the people who are "superstars" in our community of scientists are not attractive. What they do have is a lot of cleverness and a lot of dedication to their job. Looks only get you so far in life. The prettiest person in the room may get your attention initially, but if he/she can't do the job as well as someone else who isn't as attractive, they won't hold that job for long.

    I agree with you. You can't get by on looks alone. But provided they have the required (not the best, necessarily) skill set to do the job, they probably have a leg up on it.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
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    They may be taller statistically, but they didn't get there by being tall. That's my point. They got there by being smart, resourceful, and wise. I have no doubt than an average guy who is extremely good at his job and clever enough could be a very successful CEO making a ton of money (and according to those statistics, that's still true). In the end, it matters more what you DO than what you look like if you want to get to the very top in life.

    My field is academia, and I can tell you straight up that most of my colleagues and the people who are "superstars" in our community of scientists are not attractive. What they do have is a lot of cleverness and a lot of dedication to their job. Looks only get you so far in life. The prettiest person in the room may get your attention initially, but if he/she can't do the job as well as someone else who isn't as attractive, they won't hold that job for long.

    I agree with you. You can't get by on looks alone. But provided they have the required (not the best, necessarily) skill set to do the job, they probably have a leg up on it.

    Maybe initially, but not in the long run. Most careers are too competitive for mediocre people to get to the top. It might get you an initial advantage, but eventually, the guy hitting the pavement, coming up with blockbuster ideas, making the best connections, getting the best skills under his belt, etc. will win out over the good-looking mediocre-skilled guy.

    Just to clarify, I don't think that means that people should just "let themselves go" or whatever. Being presentable and approachable is critical too, but just that in the end, it's the people who put in the work and have the skills that make it the furthest is all. That's really my only point.
  • sktllmdrhmz
    sktllmdrhmz Posts: 2,073 Member
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    Now obviously, this topic might just separate itself with pretty people saying it's fair on one side and ugly people saying it's unfair on the other side

    Shallow much? You're not just talking about having respect for people who are fit and healthy. You're talking about people's looks. It also depends on what you consider "success" or "getting ahead". I find people who are smart, kind, humble regardless of how "pretty" they are to be more successful in life.

    Do you follow me around these days? And yes, I am talking about how people look. That's the whole point of the discussion.
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,720 Member
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    You posted about attractive people and then quoted studies about tall people. Forgive me if I don't follow...

    Intelligent and attractive people would of couse do very well, but that would mostly be due to their intelligence. Looks don't hurt but unless it's specifically a looks based career (acting, modeling, etc.) you just aren't going to get very far based on looks alone. Again they don't hurt, but you need something more to back them up.

    You're right. I should have phrased my original post a little more broadly. The tall people get perceived as better leaders based on their appearance. There's a correlation between their success and their looks, though not necessarily their attractiveness.

    That's just the primitive monkey parts of our brain responding to what we perceive as a strong leader based on outdated qualifications. I was just thinking yesterday how funny it is that we still have that. It's not like anyone honestly believes their boss is going to have to physically fight somebody for the well being of the company. Yet there it still is.. hundreds of thousands of years later. Still looking up to the biggest primate in the room for leadership.

    There's a reason most women say they won't date short men, and it has nothing to do with dancing as they like to claim.
  • sktllmdrhmz
    sktllmdrhmz Posts: 2,073 Member
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    They may be taller statistically, but they didn't get there by being tall. That's my point. They got there by being smart, resourceful, and wise. I have no doubt than an average guy who is extremely good at his job and clever enough could be a very successful CEO making a ton of money (and according to those statistics, that's still true). In the end, it matters more what you DO than what you look like if you want to get to the very top in life.

    My field is academia, and I can tell you straight up that most of my colleagues and the people who are "superstars" in our community of scientists are not attractive. What they do have is a lot of cleverness and a lot of dedication to their job. Looks only get you so far in life. The prettiest person in the room may get your attention initially, but if he/she can't do the job as well as someone else who isn't as attractive, they won't hold that job for long.

    I agree with you. You can't get by on looks alone. But provided they have the required (not the best, necessarily) skill set to do the job, they probably have a leg up on it.

    Maybe initially, but not in the long run. Most careers are too competitive for mediocre people to get to the top. It might get you an initial advantage, but eventually, the guy hitting the pavement, coming up with blockbuster ideas, making the best connections, getting the best skills under his belt, etc. will win out over the good-looking mediocre-skilled guy.

    They absolutely will. But good-looking mediocre-skilled guy will probably get ahead of ugly mediocre-skilled guy.
  • atsteele
    atsteele Posts: 1,358 Member
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    So, the idea that pretty people get ahead in life based on their looks is pretty commonplace, right?

    Do you think that's fair or unfair?

    Now obviously, this topic might just separate itself with pretty people saying it's fair on one side and ugly people saying it's unfair on the other side,

    Are any of you hoping or maybe even planning to use your newfound looks to get ahead?

    I, for one, am aware of how much effort goes into being fit, and when I get to that point I will very happily reap any benefits it might provide without a second thought.

    Whether or not it is fair, there is a general bias towards better looking people in the business world. http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052970203687504576655331418204842.html

    And if I am planning to use my looks to get ahead, now or in the future, I'm screwed. Because I'm 45yo this year and this gal isn't getting any better looking.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
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    They may be taller statistically, but they didn't get there by being tall. That's my point. They got there by being smart, resourceful, and wise. I have no doubt than an average guy who is extremely good at his job and clever enough could be a very successful CEO making a ton of money (and according to those statistics, that's still true). In the end, it matters more what you DO than what you look like if you want to get to the very top in life.

    My field is academia, and I can tell you straight up that most of my colleagues and the people who are "superstars" in our community of scientists are not attractive. What they do have is a lot of cleverness and a lot of dedication to their job. Looks only get you so far in life. The prettiest person in the room may get your attention initially, but if he/she can't do the job as well as someone else who isn't as attractive, they won't hold that job for long.

    I agree with you. You can't get by on looks alone. But provided they have the required (not the best, necessarily) skill set to do the job, they probably have a leg up on it.

    Maybe initially, but not in the long run. Most careers are too competitive for mediocre people to get to the top. It might get you an initial advantage, but eventually, the guy hitting the pavement, coming up with blockbuster ideas, making the best connections, getting the best skills under his belt, etc. will win out over the good-looking mediocre-skilled guy.

    They absolutely will. But good-looking mediocre-skilled guy will probably get ahead of ugly mediocre-skilled guy.

    That may be, but both of those guys are capable of putting in more work to improve their skills. It's not always about the looks.

    I've actually seen instances where being TOO good looking can be a problem for some people. I've had female colleagues who are really beautiful run into problems with people not taking them seriously even if their work is better than most of their counterparts. It can go either way.
  • sktllmdrhmz
    sktllmdrhmz Posts: 2,073 Member
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    That's just the primitive monkey parts of our brain responding to what we perceive as a strong leader based on outdated qualifications. I was just thinking yesterday how funny it is that we still have that. It's not like anyone honestly believes their boss is going to have to physically fight somebody for the well being of the company. Yet there it still is.. hundreds of thousands of years later. Still looking up to the biggest primate in the room for leadership.

    There's a reason most women say they won't date short men, and it has nothing to do with dancing as they like to claim.

    I've also wondered if there might be some correlation between confidence and the extroverted nature of these guys and their size. I wonder if they were always the big kids on the playground, so to speak, and have been in a leadership/"speak their mind" position their entire lives.
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
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    Do you follow me around these days? And yes, I am talking about how people look. That's the whole point of the discussion.

    I follow the Chit-Chat forum and most of the topics I see from you give me the impression you're just a slight bit shallow. Anyway, I did reply other than to point that out.
  • AlayshaJ
    AlayshaJ Posts: 703 Member
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    In my experience and my husbands , its been an issue. Peoples jealousy over my face has given me some set backs. I also had a manager who told me she ignored all my hard work because I was good looking and already got enough recognition. People spite me and don't like me because of what my face looks like. I have had issues with my friends because they think their boy friends think I am hot or whatever and it makes them insecure. It didnt matter that I had a husband. Girlfriends hover over their boyfriends at parties so I don't talk to them. Even if I am with my husband or have a ring on. Its kept me from getting friends.

    Its just a pretty face, I don't see why people can't get past that.
  • EmCarroll1990
    EmCarroll1990 Posts: 2,849 Member
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    It is so fair. I seen a picture once that had before and afters of a group of women. The before pictures were of these overweight, old and weathered looking women....The afters were these gorgeous, fit and young women...THE SAME WOMEN! And it had a quote at the bottom "There is not such thing as an ugly women, just a lazy women." I loved it!

    This quote is sooo incorrect.
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
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    There's a big conference every year in my industry. My industry is very male dominated. It annoys the piss out of me that companies utilize attractive sales women who know very little about what they are selling but I guess it's effective.
  • sktllmdrhmz
    sktllmdrhmz Posts: 2,073 Member
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    Do you follow me around these days? And yes, I am talking about how people look. That's the whole point of the discussion.

    I follow the Chit-Chat forum and most of the topics I see from you give me the impression you're just a slight bit shallow. Anyway, I did reply other than to point that out.

    Fair points all round.
  • Foxypoo61287
    Foxypoo61287 Posts: 638 Member
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    So, the idea that pretty people get ahead in life based on their looks is pretty commonplace, right?

    Do you think that's fair or unfair?

    Now obviously, this topic might just separate itself with pretty people saying it's fair on one side and ugly people saying it's unfair on the other side,

    Are any of you hoping or maybe even planning to use your newfound looks to get ahead?

    I, for one, am aware of how much effort goes into being fit, and when I get to that point I will very happily reap any benefits it might provide without a second thought.


    It depends on where they are going in life. If you want to be a model, well yea, the pretty ones get far. But if your a computer engineer you don't have to have the looks to get far there. Just the smarts. For example; the Miss USA contest was on like 2 weeks ago. Most of the girls were asked who the VP was. Some of them didn't know. They aren't really judged on their wits.

    Some pretty people have it easier. I know when I was in HS, I was on the soccer team for 4 years. Varsity. And played soccer for 3 years prior to highschool. I ran my butt off everyday during practice & games. And was STILL a size 16. My sister can sit and eat CRAP for food and do NOTHING and stay her size 4 that she was lucky enough to get and she played soccer too. Nothing was different between us, yea same mom & dad. Same lifestyle.

    My point is, it can go both ways. :)
  • EmCarroll1990
    EmCarroll1990 Posts: 2,849 Member
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    There's a big conference every year in my industry. My industry is very male dominated. It annoys the piss out of me that companies utilize attractive sales women who know very little about what they are selling but I guess it's effective.
    It's definitely effective. The sales girls that come in here (I work in a male dominated industry as well) make sales and then the guys come back not even knowing what they bought. It's pathetic and humorous at the same time.
  • gingerveg
    gingerveg Posts: 748 Member
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    Smart people get WAY further than pretty people. Ever seen the Forbes richest people list? Ever notice most world leaders? Not a lot of pretty faces there.

    But to your original point, I see no problem with using your looks to your advantage. Though, in my experience, in some careers, being super-attractive isn't always a good thing. It can result in being ostracized instead of promoted on your merit.
    ^This.

    Barring physical inabilities (injuries etc.) you can always be fit, but regardless of what we do (if we are lucky) we will all age. So yes, you can look good for your age, but chasing some idealized "handsome or beautiful" your whole life will only result in failure. To really get ahead get a degree, work hard, learn new skills be creative and innovative. Do something that matters to you. There really are no easy solutions to getting through life. Being handsome/pretty does not necessarily get you ahead. It might benefit you here and there but it might also be a detriment. Don't be fooled, we always give something up to gain something. Bodies break down, money can be lost, people die, possessions can be stolen from you. Your knowledge and accomplishments are the only thing that is truly yours--just know that is what will get you ahead in life and nurture it.
  • RajvinderS
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    i am a postgrad. my future career might be as university staff. we are all hideous hideous creatures. we look like hobbits and stuff. Well maybe not, but this is how i see myself when i stand next to the delicious undergrads. I just want to eat them - they are all so fresh-faced. but if i eat them, i might get herpes and whatnot.

    raj
  • Bahet
    Bahet Posts: 1,254 Member
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    Fitness will get you ahead but pretty can be a detriment. When I first started out my career I was a 21yo college graduate with a decent amount of experience including interning in the accounting department of the county government. I turned in resumes for financial positions I was perfectly qualified for and I often got interviews. But invariably if the interviewer was a man he'd see me as just a pretty face/body and next thing I knew he wanted me to take a typing test and started explaining the phone system. They offered me a job but it was at the front desk as a secretary or receptionist instead of in my own office/cubicle in the back. It wasn't that I didn't interview well as women interviewers took me far more seriously and more than a few of the men made comments along the lines of "You're too pretty to hide in the back. How about we check your typing skills and then we can get you a position right out front where everyone can see you." Seriously. It was disgusting.
  • SMJ1987
    SMJ1987 Posts: 368
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    I think it does help up to a certain point but it can work against you as well. A close friend of mine is very attractive in an obvious sort of way, blonde hair, tall, pretty face and big boobs. She dresses very nicely and appropriately...not matronly but not too sexy either, but she gets "talked to" about her manner of dress on a regular basis and she is not wearing anything different from the other women in her office. I feel in her case it's holding her back a little bit as her supervisors are (presumably) jealous women.