Backhanded compliment about my fatitude

LainMac
LainMac Posts: 412 Member
edited December 22 in Motivation and Support
I am curious if other people have recieved backhanded compliments related to their weight. Mine was:

"Lain, I don't know how you fat. You don't eat fat people food."

Said years ago by a coworker was from mainland China. And he is right, I have always eaten healthy stuff. I hardly ever binge on the "fat people" food. The problem for me is to move enough to eat the amount of healthy stuff I want to in a day. (1800 to 2100 cals at day). *sigh*
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Replies

  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    i've always exercised (including running and heavy weight lifting) and i've always had healthy food (i've always loved vegetables and grilled seafood and fruit), so yes i have gotten this A LOT during my journey into fattyville. people have even gone so far as to tell me i had a thyroid problem or hormonal issues even though i never have :laugh:

    i dont necessarily think it's a backhanded compliment. i think some people just legitimately dont understand how weight gain and weight loss works. if you eat more calories than you need then you're going to gain weight. it's that simple.

    just because i was burn 3000 calories a day through living and exercise isn't going to negate the fact that i ate 4000+ calories a day
  • ak_in_ak
    ak_in_ak Posts: 657 Member
    My boyfriend and friends tells me this all the time, I don't think it is back handed either. Fat people are portrayed as stuffing their faces constantly with fast food, when we don't do that people are confused.
  • mcpherson4
    mcpherson4 Posts: 287 Member
    I have that bike. :smile: :happy:
  • mevalentina
    mevalentina Posts: 362 Member
    I always got you have such a pretty face :mad: Okay I have other parts too guess they are not pretty as well :brokenheart:
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    One of my "friends" commented on my weight by saying: "Wow, you're starting to look like a woman again!" I don't think I ever didn't look like a woman, my highest weight was 220...
  • munkey418
    munkey418 Posts: 139
    Mine wasnt exactly weight related but I had a picture of my older sister in my planner. My sister was 5'4" and size 4, long brown hair and considered by everyone i knew to be gorgeous. And then there was me (apparently) Ive always been heavier than i should be, im 5'7" and for the longest time kept my hair VERY short because i didnt want to take the time with it to have long hair. Anywho. Classmate saw the picture and asked who it was, explained she was my older sister her first reponse was "but shes white!" apparently she thought I was african american... when i explained we BOTH are she said "oh! Well she's very pretty. You guys look NOTHING alike....." Really dude? -.- Lame/....
  • GasMasterFlash
    GasMasterFlash Posts: 2,206 Member
    I am curious if other people have recieved backhanded compliments related to their weight. Mine was:

    "Lain, I don't know how you fat. You don't eat fat people food."

    Said years ago by a coworker was from mainland China. And he is right, I have always eaten healthy stuff. I hardly ever binge on the "fat people" food. The problem for me is to move enough to eat the amount of healthy stuff I want to in a day. (1800 to 2100 cals at day). *sigh*
    I immediately imagined this guy saying it...

    y-u-no-meme-generator-y-u-fat-u-no-eat-fat-people-food-81b3b3.jpg
  • Sharyn913
    Sharyn913 Posts: 777 Member
    I was 185lbs and a woman asked if I was pregnant, and even touched my stomach. I replied semi-rudely "NO, I'm just fat" and turned my back to walk away. I wanted to cry.
  • joceyofdoom
    joceyofdoom Posts: 21 Member
    I've gotten "you carry your weight well." So, my fat is shaped nicer than other people's? Yeah, okay.
  • harleygaljojo
    harleygaljojo Posts: 111 Member
    I've heard the same comments. People don't think about the health problems that prevent people from loosing weight. I just figure sometimes you just have to ignore ignorant people.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    I've gotten "you carry your weight well." So, my fat is shaped nicer than other people's? Yeah, okay.
    Actually that's not even close to what it means, and it is a compliment.
  • Showgirlbody
    Showgirlbody Posts: 402 Member
    People never said that, but I'm sure they thought it. Or they thought that I go home and eat a bag of chips and gallon of ice cream. I'd be in the lunch room with my little healthy homemade lunch..turkey sammy, fruit, etc., and there were these skinny chicks eating wings, and pizza dipped in ranch. Not fair at all yet they were thin and I was/am not. I also went to the gym most days. I've never been a perfect eater, I do splurge and eat fast food or junk food once a week or so but not every day. People who have never had a weight problem really don't get it. Some people can burn more than others naturally so it's just a fluke of nature that one person my height with less activity level can be thin when they eat bad food and probably twice as much. We don't all have to eat a pound of bacon for breakfast to have fat issues. lol
  • LainMac
    LainMac Posts: 412 Member
    I don't get the "pretty face" one but I do get the "when are you due".

    It is very funny when I tell them I am 50 years old so I hope NOT. (Talk about your mid-life crisis!!) But again it is the confusion about what "fat" people do. I carry most of my weight around my middle but move very well and often fast so they people can only suppose that the bigness all comes from being pregnant.
  • CHUBBYLOVLEY
    CHUBBYLOVLEY Posts: 65 Member
    My mom, yes everyone even my own mother says " oh my gosh! Your losing so much weight you look good, great! now I'm going to be the fatest one in the family. I'm so depressed" And for her that's a great compliment.O
  • GasMasterFlash
    GasMasterFlash Posts: 2,206 Member
    My mom, yes everyone even my own mother says " oh my gosh! Your losing so much weight you look good, great! now I'm going to be the fatest one in the family. I'm so depressed" And for her that's a great compliment.O
    Self-deprecating for her, but absolutely a compliment toward you.
  • Beastette
    Beastette Posts: 1,497 Member
    I was 185lbs and a woman asked if I was pregnant, and even touched my stomach. I replied semi-rudely "NO, I'm just fat" and turned my back to walk away. I wanted to cry.

    I did this even when I was VERY pregnant. Just to teach 'em a lesson.
  • galaxyhearts
    galaxyhearts Posts: 258 Member
    I've gotten "you carry your weight well." So, my fat is shaped nicer than other people's? Yeah, okay.
    Actually that's not even close to what it means, and it is a compliment, but good job on being over-sensitive.

    Why are you so offended by this? Are you the one who said that to her? LOL.


    I actually agree that it's not a back handed compliment but I don't see the point in being so devastated by it if that person felt that way about it. Hahaa

    Then again, by that logic, you can be as annoyed as you want.

    Carry on.
  • TealStar13
    TealStar13 Posts: 165
    I am curious if other people have recieved backhanded compliments related to their weight. Mine was:

    "Lain, I don't know how you fat. You don't eat fat people food."

    Said years ago by a coworker was from mainland China. And he is right, I have always eaten healthy stuff. I hardly ever binge on the "fat people" food. The problem for me is to move enough to eat the amount of healthy stuff I want to in a day. (1800 to 2100 cals at day). *sigh*
    I immediately imagined this guy saying it...

    y-u-no-meme-generator-y-u-fat-u-no-eat-fat-people-food-81b3b3.jpg

    LOL the picture is funny
  • threnners
    threnners Posts: 175 Member
    I have that bike too!

    I've had people ask me if I was pregnant too. My reply is "No, I've just got a big fat *kitten*" and that usually shuts them up.
  • nattielove
    nattielove Posts: 17 Member
    I think you're just misinterpreting a culture thing. I know a lot of asians (legitimately from Asia, not the westernised ones) who are very upfront in this way. I also have received a comment before from a thai.. "Ohhh, you have got fat since I last you!". Straight out. It sucks, but someone's gotta tell you.
  • kristinlough
    kristinlough Posts: 828 Member
    My cousin told me I needed uglier bridesmaids. I'm going to assume that's because of my back fat, not my busted face. Could be wrong ...
  • Oh.. I have gotten the pregnant comment too. And its like :angry::brokenheart:
  • MtnKat
    MtnKat Posts: 714
    I had a woman say to me, while I was standing on the curb waiting for my husband to pick me up with our brand new baby, "you just had a baby? Are you sure there aren't two more in there?"

    And just a month ago, my father, who I haven't seen in a couple of years, says "are you still running?" (me: "yes but I've been injured so I've been struggling") my dad: "then it must be the thyroid because your sister has that and she's chubby too!" (and yes, I do happen to have a thyroid problem)

    Edit: Come to think of it, that baby comment was 23 years ago. To this day I am still stung by that. Some people are truly rude.
  • still_crafty
    still_crafty Posts: 682 Member
    I used to (and still do) get the "pretty face" comment. It has never offended me. I knew I was fat. I took the compliment for what it was and moved on because it was coming from someone who didn't really matter in my life - not worth the energy.

    Anyone that matters to me in my life knows better than to even attempt to blow smoke up my *kitten* because I'd call bullsh!t on it in a second.
  • LainMac
    LainMac Posts: 412 Member
    I wasn't upset by my coworker's comment. At least he had noticed that I was and am a healthy eater.

    Unilke my evil boss M (same job) who once said to my request to work at home one day a week (something that she let all the guys who worked for do)

    "Wouldn't you be afraid that your refridgerator would distract you from work?"

    I think that comment said more about her eating habits than mine. The problem with my fridge, as my kids will tell you, is that is doesn't have any "cool" snack food unless you Chobani yogurt or baby carrots as cool snack food. The fridge is full of whole foods that have be sliced and diced and then cooked.
  • misskerouac
    misskerouac Posts: 2,242 Member
    Despite my profile picture I actually rarely wear anything that shows any skin and I hate if I wear something fitted (like a pencil skirt or skinny jeans) and my mom will say "good for you"

    ....


    like..."good for you not letting your fatness limit your clothing choices"

    thanks mom
  • Jladd42
    Jladd42 Posts: 23 Member
    My son's care provider said to me once "I've noticed you've lost weight. That's good because when I first met you, you were big." She's asian as well...

    A long time ago, (~6 yrs) I worked at this mom and pop grocery store and was having a bad day, and a huge line of customers. The customer i was currently ringing up said, "cheer up honey, put on a smile!" to which the customer in line behind him said "It's ok, she must be uncomfortable because it's so hot out and that baby in there must be so heavy!" I was not pregnant by any means...

    people are ignorant. Surprisingly i was not offended by my son's care provider, but I've gotten used to the way the asian culture is, they are very direct. My mother in law is 100% filipino so I think I conditioned myself to shrug things off.

    However, I will never forget the "pregnant" comment while certainly not pregnant. Those definitely hurt....
  • marissa4354
    marissa4354 Posts: 140
    I've gotten "you carry your weight well." So, my fat is shaped nicer than other people's? Yeah, okay.
    Actually that's not even close to what it means, and it is a compliment, but good job on being over-sensitive.

    Wow, I've seen you on multiple posts, and all you are is negative. Show some support. That's what we're here for.
  • Seokie
    Seokie Posts: 197 Member
    When my friends see how I exercise and what I usually eat they are surprised how I look - I should look 'normal' I've been told :(
  • leomom72
    leomom72 Posts: 1,797 Member
    bump
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