Wanting to "lift heavy"... but too weak to start!

Thanks for all the encouragement! I guess "heavy" is a totally subjective term... it's just hard not to compare myself to others.

The reason I'm doing 10 reps instead of 6-8 is because I'm following NROLFW after hearing so much praise for it, and it has me doing 10 reps. Maybe I should try less reps? I don't know if altering the program is a good idea.

Interesting thought that if I can bench 65 I can squat that much... I swear by the 10th rep at 25lbs I feel like my legs are going to fall off! Maybe using a barbell instead of dumbbells would make a difference... too bad I'm just using my apartment complex's gym which doesn't have barbells. I can't afford a real gym membership right now.

If you can do a bench with 65lbs for 2 sets of 8 reps, you're stronger than you think!

Seriously!

It took me about 4 or 5 weeks to get up to 65 lbs on bench for 5 sets of 5 reps.

I was stuck at 50 lbs for the longest time.

And, heavy means what is heavy for you! I started the overhead press with 30 lbs, and I'm still only at 52.5 lbs after 8 weeks.

The most important part is to keep increasing the load. That can mean going up in weight or increasing in reps by at least a couple.

Before I got fractional weight plates, there was no way I could increase 5 lbs every time on the upper body lifts (lower body, no problem). Instead of the 5x5 I was trying for, I'd stay at the same weight and do 6/6/5/5/5 or 6/6/6/5/5 then the NEXT time I'd increase and try to do what I could, which may have only been 4/3/3/2/2 with new weight. I'd stay at that weight at least 3 times, trying to get to 5x5. Most of the time, by the third time, I've got it.

Thanks for all the encouragement! I guess "heavy" is a totally subjective term... it's just hard not to compare myself to others.

The reason I'm doing 10 reps instead of 6-8 is because I'm following NROLFW after hearing so much praise for it, and it has me doing 10 reps. Maybe I should try less reps? I don't know if altering the program is a good idea.

Interesting thought that if I can bench 65 I can squat that much... I swear by the 10th rep at 25lbs I feel like my legs are going to fall off! Maybe using a barbell instead of dumbbells would make a difference... too bad I'm just using my apartment complex's gym which doesn't have barbells. I can't afford a real gym membership right now.

A few things that will help you...

Eat protein every three hours, lots of it. You need protein to rebuild your muscles so that they can get stronger. If you don't eat protein, your body will eat your muscles and it makes it almost impossible to build strength.

Eat carbs prior to weight training-simple carbs are technically worse for you but will help because your body can access the energy faster. Your body needs energy to flex your muscles and lift weights. In particular you need Carbs/ATP/Creatine/oxygen.

When doing cardio try not to hit your body's O2 cycle (aerobic exercise). Aerobic exercise is counterproductive to building muscle. Your body burns protein and carbs during the O2 cycle and fat during the anaerobic cycle. Instead of running try walking on maximum incline and keeping your heart rate in the fat burning zone rather than in the aerobic exercise zone. Doing this will help build muscle rather than eat it away.

Use machines in conjunction with free weights. You will be able to lift more weight on the machines because you can focus your efforts on the large muscle groups without your smaller muscles holding you back (stabilizing muscles). Continue to use free weights as well to work on your stability, however, you will notice larger strength gains using machines.

There are two products that you can buy at GNC that will considerably help with strength training. One should be obvious, it's Creatine. Your body will love you for feeding it Creatine daily during strength training. Alternatively your body can get Creatine from meats and proteins, but if you take the supplement your muscles will surely have the supply they need for the energy they consume during weight training. The second product increases blood flow to the muscles, is an immediate precursor to the synthesis of Nitric Oxide, and is necessary for your body's synthesis of Creatine. It's called L-Arginine, and probably the best product on the market right now to deliver the supplement is branded "NO3", however GNC has their own generic brand that is probably just as good. Follow the directions on the box for how to take NO3. These products have been on the market for many years and are widely considered safe.

Trust me- by using machines, eating protein every three hours, creatine daily, and carbs and NO3 pre-workout, you will see exponential strength gains. Also make sure that you are doing multiple sets. I noticed some people mentioned doing 6-8 repetitions, but make sure if you are doing so few repetitions that you are doing 5-7 sets for each exercise. Your muscles should be sore the next day, if not, you're doing something wrong. The soreness comes from the lactic acid that is released by your body when you reach muscle fatigue and then do that one extra set. That last set is where ALL of the strength gains come from, and if you aren't doing that last set after you feel like you're muscles can't take any more, then you're not going to see the gains in strength. You need to shred those muscle fibers so that your body can rebuild them stronger overnight.

I hope this advice is helpful. I'm a certified trainer and combat instructor. Let me know if any of this works for you, I'm curious to see your results!

^Just disregard that entire post, too much misinformation. Don't need to bother with nitric oxide. And soreness doesn't matter. And going to failure isn't mandatory.