Wanting to "lift heavy"... but too weak to start!

Thanks for all the encouragement! I guess "heavy" is a totally subjective term... it's just hard not to compare myself to others.

The reason I'm doing 10 reps instead of 6-8 is because I'm following NROLFW after hearing so much praise for it, and it has me doing 10 reps. Maybe I should try less reps? I don't know if altering the program is a good idea.

Interesting thought that if I can bench 65 I can squat that much... I swear by the 10th rep at 25lbs I feel like my legs are going to fall off! Maybe using a barbell instead of dumbbells would make a difference... too bad I'm just using my apartment complex's gym which doesn't have barbells. I can't afford a real gym membership right now.

Hi Lauren,

You are doing great, making progress and have a goal to strive for. Just stick with it and you will get stronger and be able to lift what you want. So what if you can;'t right now-- it'll be an even greater accomplishment when you can.

As for the reps-- as a women you wan to stick to the higher rep sets, our muscles recover faster than men and a higher reps with less rest between sets is recommended. If your legs are jello and mush then you are challenging your body which is excellent! Just make sure you're drinking lots of water and protein to help them recover. Another benefit of the weights is your metabolism will speed up, BONUS!

Keep it up, you are doing great!!

Also Lauren

So, you're annoyed at making 150-500% gains in strength? Have I missed something?

On my first day of Workout A, I was able to lift the 45lb bar--barely. I lifted it from the squat rack just enough to tuck my head under it. Then I started squatting with it. I've been doing squats without weights for months so my form for that is well-practiced and I can do many of them and go fairly low. I actually didn't feel very challenged. Yet when I went to try to take the bar off my shoulders, I could not lift it above my head! That freaked me out. Then someone on my friend list told me if I was using a rack instead of a power cage, I was gonna have trouble later when the weights got bigger than I could lift above my head. I didn't even know what a power cage was but that simple mention had me googling and it turns out, my gym has one! It indeed was much safer.

Why am I telling you this? Using the dumbbells to replace the squatting bar, is not exactly the same exercise. It's not bad. You just can't even begin comparing what you are doing to what someone with a bar does. Here's why. When you are holding the dumbbells, your arms are doing most of the contraction. Some is in the shoulders. Your legs are doing the work from the squats themselves. With the bar, your legs are doing most of the work, your shoulder second and your arms not very much. Our legs are stronger thus that's why you see the difference. You are placing the emphasis on a different part of the body.

My honest opinion is if you aren't using that gym for free and don't live in a remote location, you may want to think about signing up with another gym. Definitely look for the bars, how high the weights to up to and a power cage. I'm only in Stage 1 so I can't tell you the other requirements later in the game as far as what you need in a gym.

It is true that you can't compare yourself to others but I wanted to point this out because you are also comparing exercises that aren't exactly the same. Kudos for making do with what you have though and not letting it stop you. I think NROLW has a section on what you need for a home gym and some modifications for having less equipment so look to see if you get some advice there.

For what it is worth, I can't do a full push up yet. I started with a wall push up the first week and couldn't complete all the reps. Now I'm doing all the reps at an incline position. Hoping this week I can attempt the floor pushup with success.

Not only can we not compare ourselves to one another, we are also each going to have different areas of strengths and weaknesses AND different backgrounds before we came--like my experience with squats.

The true measure is whether you are able to gain strength each time you go.

I am trying to pay attention to protein and carbs in my diet too. I don't know about creatine vs whey yet but I know how many grams total I need and I'm getting at least close to it each time. It still needs a little work. But I just started and I'm workin to build it.

I did have to cut out my other exercises this week because I wasn't able to lift successfully last week. I got fatigued too early. So for now I'm focusing on this, some leisure walking and if summer activities come up--I won't turn them down. Once I get better at this, I may add some back in but for now I am letting the rest days do their magic.

Super BUMP!

I am so happy you are doing this..it sounds like you got a lot of great support from people here. I have been lifting for 9 months and the changes have been incredible. Just be patient and do your best. You will be able to add on over time.

Jules:flowerforyou:

i haven't read all the responses as there are so many, but don't compare yourself to other people.... lifting heavy means lifting the heaviest amount of weight that you can & feeling like you can physically do no more.... so if you are doing 10-12 reps, you really should be finding it difficult by about rep 9, and the last rep number 12 should be incredibly difficult. then you just increase your weight when you find that its not as difficult as it once was.

i don't lift very heavy at all compared to others, but then have also seen grown men not be able to do some of the weights i lift, but the important thing is, the weights are heavy for me, i am sweating and shaking on my last 3 reps, and when i sit up i have a headspin, lol. over the last 4 weeks i have tripled some of my weights. all you have to do is make a start, and keep going - you can't fail.

I went from being able to do only 20-30 pushups to over 300 on the bench with that routine in under a year so disregard if you like but it works. True you don't need nitric oxide, or creatine for that matter, but they will help, especially if fatigue is holding you back. Going to failure isn't mandatory but were not talking about what the least effective way to build strength is here... I'm just letting you know what the most effective way that I found is. Sure you can do one set per day and maybe you can upgrade from 5 pounds to 6 pounds after a few months. Soreness doesn't matter? lol

I have no doubts that this program worked for you. But it's way too much information (some good, some wrong, but all too complicated) and none of it is necessary for a newbie lifter like the OP. Did she even say that fatigue or soreness is holding her back? I don't have a problem with your advice in general, but it's not advice for the OP or anybody in a similar situation that clicks on this thread looking for help.

To the OP, of COURSE you can squat that bar. Almost everyone seriously underestimates how much they can handle. Some of it is muscle and training, but a lot of it is mental. A 45 pound bar to squat with is about the same strength you use right now to carry 3 bags of groceries up a flight of stairs. Can you stand on up on one leg? If you weigh 140 then one leg just handled 140 pounds by itself. Jump as high as you can and land on one leg. That's the equivalent of 3 times your bodyweight when you land.

All this is different than actually putting a bar across your back and squatting but not as much as you think. Either way, I hope you're seeing my point. You're doing great, and you're capable of much more than you think you are.

Good luck!

Heavy is relative! Just has to feel heavy to *you*. The point is to tax your muscles to the point of failure--the means don't really matter!

I'm wondering if other women have dealt with this!

I've never been very into athletics, except basketball in middle school and dance all through high school. That being said, I've never been very strong at all. Especially after I graduated high school and stopped dancing.

Now I've been wanting to start "lifting heavy" as I've seen such great success stories with it. The problem is, I feel I don't have the physical capacity to lift heavy at all! I completed Stage 1 of NROLFW but the most I could use by the end was 10-15lb dumbbells depending on the exercise (I don't have access to a barbell so I have to use dumbbells. Yeah, no barbell at my little gym, it sucks.) Yesterday I attempted a bench press for the first time and I could only do 2 sets of 8 reps at 65lbs. I felt so pathetic!

I just feel kind of discouraged because I always see posts on here of women being like, "Just started lifting heavy today, squatted with a 75lb barbell and it felt great!" Lol I don't think I could even pick up a standard 45lb barbell of the ground, let alone squat with it. I squat with about 25lbs (two 12.5lb dumbbells) right now and it's often hard for me to finish 10 reps!

Don't get me wrong, I've gotten stronger... a copule of months ago I couldn't even do two push-ups and now I can do ten, though it's a struggle. I did used to use 10lbs to squat and now I'm up to 25lbs so that's something I know... it's just frustrating. I want to be one of those girls who lifts heavy and I'm envious of those who just jump right into it. Any other weak women out there going through the same thing?

To echo what others have said..."lifting 'heavy'" means lifting heavy for YOU! I'm a guy who will start "lifting heavy" in the next few weeks, and I just ordered...a 5kg (that's 11 pounds) "training" barbell to start off. That's right, my wife and I will be squatting and pressing starting at 11 pounds. Eleven. On the squat. Although we'll probably get ten pound bumpers and start the deadlift at 31. (yes, a 31 pound deadlift. Yes, I know that's light).

Point is, you start low, you work your way up steadily. If you're following stronglifts 5x5 or starting strength, you'll likely be adding 5 lbs every workout to each exercise (assuming you can finish all your reps with proper form). do that on the squat, that's 15 lbs/week. If you're already doing 2x8 on the bench at 65...well, that's not chopped liver.

And again, the only person you're competing against is you. Not other people in the weight room (most of whom don't give a rip what you're doing, something I discovered years ago when I first went through a phase of working out regularly), not other posters on here (who are just trying to share info and generally encourage everyone else), not some supermodel or actress or whoever on the TV, but you. The you of a month ago, a week ago, five minutes ago. You're just constantly trying (allowing for sufficient recovery, of course) to always get just a little bit better.

As soon as our bar arrives, I'll be doing 5x5 overhead presses at 11 pounds. Better than not pressing at all.