Annoyed by People Commenting??

2

Replies

  • turnercherrie
    turnercherrie Posts: 24 Member
    the commenting is a bit of a pain, but i hate it the most when they are stood with a cake in their hand asking how did you do it !!!

    someone even asked me if i was taking drugs to loose weight !!!! i was very offended, they have no idea how hard i have worked and how many of my evenings are spent in the gym.

    so thank you for saying i look nice, but if you want to follow it up with, are you taking weight loss drugs or asking me how they can loose weight, then please dont bother.

    when your ready to loose weight something clicks and you get off your butt and go for it, you dont stand around in the office kitchen eating your fifth cake of the day asking me how to do it


    arghhhh and relax :-)
  • MizCJ84
    MizCJ84 Posts: 335 Member
    No way! I love receiving comments about my weight loss because I've worked very hard to achieve these goals. Just be confident in who you are, who you were, and who you will be in the future.

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  • daniflems
    daniflems Posts: 69 Member
    Hahaha....again I love to see how negative most people are on the internet and always willing to judge...


    please don't get me wrong..I LOVE HEARING PEOPLE TELL ME I LOOK GREAT!....I think I should clarify when it is the SAME people who comment....like one guy that I see maybe once every two weeks says something about my weight loss EVERY time I see him....or people that I work with and see everyday. I suppose I feel that saying something once or twice is acceptable....anything more than that seems overkill....just my personal opinion which REMEMBER PEOPLE we are all entitled to. Please don't leave negative comments towards me...we should all know by now...if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all.
  • Krissy366
    Krissy366 Posts: 458 Member
    I also want to say there is a difference between complimenting and commenting. And depending on how either are being done both can be annoying. I knew a guy that couldn't give a compliment to save his soul. He would say something really sweet but would then qualify it with something awful that used to be relevant. So, in weight loss, I'm sure he'd have said something like, "You look so great now that you've lost so much weight. Before you were really fat." Even though it's true, the second statement makes the first one not feel as nice.

    As for commenting - when it's continuous, it's annoying. I work with a guy who always compliments my clothes or my jewelry if he likes it. Which is fine, until you've heard 15 comments in one day. "Hey Krissy - that's a great necklace." "Wow, just can't get over how great that necklace is." "That necklace sure does compliment your eyes." "Where did you get that necklace, it really is a great piece?" "You always have the best jewelry." "That necklace is super." and on and on...every time you see him. If the OP is experience anything similar I can see how it would get on her nerves.
  • bandenna
    bandenna Posts: 89 Member
    ohh why do you take it that way?

    this

    wow...if you want to complain about getting a compliment...just wow

    change that attitude before it changes you!

    DOUBLE THIS!
    Complaining about getting a compliment. that is..... :noway: Not what having friends on MFP is all about. Having FITNESS PALS is meant to incourage you. But, if you don't want to be encouraged and motivated, I'll remember to not send you a friend request...
  • MalissaDC
    MalissaDC Posts: 123
    I do enjoy compliments:) I feel like it's nice to hear it because I've surely been working hard!

    But I do not like it when instead of saying--you look great how much have you lost? They say, "Wow how much did you weigh before?" ummmm that's none of your business big nose;)!
  • kadyjackson
    kadyjackson Posts: 11 Member
    ohh why do you take it that way?

    this

    wow...if you want to complain about getting a compliment...just wow

    change that attitude before it changes you!

    I am with this guy....I love that people notice all my hard work, it is not easy to lose weight. And to be blunt about it if you are trying to lose a lot of weight then yea you probably did not look your "best" before you lost weight...It is the same thing as if you always wore sweats and t-shirts everyday then one day you dressed up in a cute dress, heals, makeup, the work...Everyone is going to complement you. You may still be a good looking person in sweats but in the dress you are an even better looking… same goes with weight loss. From my experience when you look better you feel better when you feel better you tend to have more confidence…Confidence is very attractive in all people (as long as it does not go over into arrogance) … People are not trying to be mean; they are just telling it like they see it.
    It is harsh but healthy=skinny and the world we live in skinny=beauty and there is nothing we are going to do to change that. But if I am Skinny to be healthy, I am not going to complain that people think I look good. When you are overweight you are more likely to get diseases and die from heart issues. So take it as a compliment that people notice that you are a healthy more confident individual.
  • Krissy366
    Krissy366 Posts: 458 Member
    ohh why do you take it that way?

    this

    wow...if you want to complain about getting a compliment...just wow

    change that attitude before it changes you!

    DOUBLE THIS!
    Complaining about getting a compliment. that is..... :noway: Not what having friends on MFP is all about. Having FITNESS PALS is meant to incourage you. But, if you don't want to be encouraged and motivated, I'll remember to not send you a friend request...

    She's not talking about on here (from what I read), she's talking about in real life. And she's already clarified that she means the same people making the same comments over and over again. Comments - not necessarily compliments. I really don't see why people are jumping all over her for it. Hearing the same thing (ANY thing) from the same person over and over again is grating. I can understand why she finds it "slightly" (her word) annoying.
  • Zumbacutie
    Zumbacutie Posts: 9 Member
    That's an interesting take. I have lost over 50lbs before and never got tired of people celebrating that accomplishment with me. In fact, it gave me even more motivation to maintain and continue on.
    I'm sorry you would be annoyed by that. Instead of worrying about how bad you may or may not have looked in the past, it might be better for you to keep your focus on the present. Enjoy where you are now and leave your history where it is...
  • AwesomelyAmber
    AwesomelyAmber Posts: 1,617 Member
    NOPE I never ever get tired of hearing it! YES "I" did look that bad before...that's exactly WHY I am busting my butt every day! :laugh:
  • Krissy366
    Krissy366 Posts: 458 Member
    Really? This is what bothers you the most? People cant even give compliments anymore without offending someone.

    Seriously! People need to stop being so damned offended over every stupid thing.

    When you've lost some serious weight, let me know and I'll be sure to talk on and on about how fat you were to begin with. The OP isn't talking about being offended by compliments, but the ongoing discussion of his/her weight loss under the guise of compliments. I can relate to this, and have discussed with others in the same position before how it seems that SOME people look at you and take large-scale weight loss as a license to discuss just how fat you were to begin with. It's incredibly offensive, and yes annoying.
    :drinker:
  • PDLUCKY
    PDLUCKY Posts: 60 Member
    I like the comments it feels good and gives me motivation to continue.
  • Prudiddy
    Prudiddy Posts: 262 Member
    Is it just me...or do you start to get slightly annoyed when people CONTINUOUSLY comment on the weight you've lost?? At first it was great...but now I can't help thinking...DID I LOOK THAT BAD BEFORE??? lol....just a little Friday venting...

    Don't be annoyed when they compliment you, Remember not everyone is there yet. So each individual is looking at it for his own reason. I can't wait until it happens to me! and Yes absolutely I must have looked that bad before, I will not forget were I came from, because it is just sooooooo easy to go back. Get off that and start to appreciate every single comment, cause that is how people lose sight, and end up right back to day 1
  • OhKelsey1
    OhKelsey1 Posts: 139
    YES. I know EXACTLY what you mean. I lost 20 pounds last summer, and EVERYONE I knew commented on it when I got back to school. And not just "Oh, wow, you lost weight!" but "Wow, you look so much better!" I went from 143 to 125 at 5'5, so I don't feel like I looked THAT bad before. Jeez! It's such a double-edged sword.

    Edit: Just saw all of the slightly rude to incredibly rude comments, and I want you to know that I think you're completely valid in feeling this way. It IS hard when people tell you you look better, because it makes you feel like you won't be beautiful or worthwhile if you gain it all back. I understand, and I think you should ignore all the people who don't.
  • daniflems
    daniflems Posts: 69 Member
    Thanks to all the people who actually took the time to read what I posted...and didn't twist it into all sorts of negativity.

    Sometimes it makes me sad to know so many people jump to the negative and come to their own conclusions about a complete stranger.

    I thought this was supposed to be a place where we could talk about how we felt and what we were going through during weight loss without judgment.

    Please...if you are looking to judge and point fingers and make assumptions and tell me how terrible I am go elsewhere.
  • daniflems
    daniflems Posts: 69 Member
    I also want to say there is a difference between complimenting and commenting. And depending on how either are being done both can be annoying. I knew a guy that couldn't give a compliment to save his soul. He would say something really sweet but would then qualify it with something awful that used to be relevant. So, in weight loss, I'm sure he'd have said something like, "You look so great now that you've lost so much weight. Before you were really fat." Even though it's true, the second statement makes the first one not feel as nice.

    As for commenting - when it's continuous, it's annoying. I work with a guy who always compliments my clothes or my jewelry if he likes it. Which is fine, until you've heard 15 comments in one day. "Hey Krissy - that's a great necklace." "Wow, just can't get over how great that necklace is." "That necklace sure does compliment your eyes." "Where did you get that necklace, it really is a great piece?" "You always have the best jewelry." "That necklace is super." and on and on...every time you see him. If the OP is experience anything similar I can see how it would get on her nerves.

    Thanks for actually getting what I was saying!!!
  • datenshi
    datenshi Posts: 840 Member
    The 90/10 Principle by Author Stephen Covey

    What is the Principle?

    10% of life is made up of what happens to you.
    90% of life is decided by how you react

    What does this mean?

    We really have NO control over 10% of what happens to us.

    You cannot control a red light. However, you can control your reaction.

    Do not let people fool you. YOU can control how you react.

    Let us use an example…

    You are having breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt.

    You have no control over what just happened. So what happens next will be determined by how you react.

    You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your wife and you criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows.

    You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish her breakfast and getting ready to go to school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school.

    Because you are late, you drive 40 miles per hour in a 30 mph speed limit zone. After a 15-minute delay and throwing a $60.00 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you realize you forgot your briefcase. Your day started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse.

    You look forward to coming home. When you arrive home, you find a small wedge in your relationship with your wife and daughter.

    Why?

    Because of how you reacted in the morning.

    Why did you have a bad day?

    A) Did the coffee cause it?
    B) Did your daughter cause it?
    C) Did the policeman cause it?
    D) Did you cause it?

    The answer is “D”

    You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.

    Here is what should have happened…

    Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry.

    You gently say, “It’s okay honey, you just need to be more careful next time.”

    Grabbing a towel you go upstairs and change your shirt. You grab your briefcase, and you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff.

    Notice the difference?

    Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different.

    Why?

    Because of how you reacted.

    You really have no control over 10% of what happens in your life. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.

    Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and headaches. We must all apply the 90/10 Principle. It can change your life!
  • lour441
    lour441 Posts: 543 Member
    I like the compliments about my weight loss.

    What I do not like is when people say "You carry your weight well". I don't need that type of "compliment".
  • DebbieMc3
    DebbieMc3 Posts: 289 Member
    NEVER!
  • The comments that really bother me are "you don't look that bad" or your not that fat. It isn't a compliment.
  • Tators
    Tators Posts: 75
    SMH at some of the post that reprimanded the OP for how she felt. I guess all the ups and downs of weight loss have a rule...hmm

    OP I understand what you mean. The fact that it was a struggle for you, and you most likely didn't share it with them. So inquiries/comments could ge geniune. But I've been around long enough to know the difference of authentic and spiteful comments. Only you know the environment of people you are around, so Im sure your discernment of it is justified.

    Just know that no matter what you looked like before YOU are still the same person in heart mind and spirit. Don't allow your feelings to get in the way, and definitely don't allow some negative comments from posters on here to get you down for speaking out on what you feel. Hope it gets better for you.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Is it just me...or do you start to get slightly annoyed when people CONTINUOUSLY comment on the weight you've lost?? At first it was great...but now I can't help thinking...DID I LOOK THAT BAD BEFORE??? lol....just a little Friday venting...

    Stop losing. Problem solved.
  • OhKelsey1
    OhKelsey1 Posts: 139
    Is it just me...or do you start to get slightly annoyed when people CONTINUOUSLY comment on the weight you've lost?? At first it was great...but now I can't help thinking...DID I LOOK THAT BAD BEFORE??? lol....just a little Friday venting...

    Stop losing. Problem solved.

    Get an attitude adjustment. Problem solved.
  • lori__lynn
    lori__lynn Posts: 59
    i can't wait for that day ~ enjoy it!
  • Bobby_Clerici
    Bobby_Clerici Posts: 1,828 Member
    No, no, no!
    People are excited for you, and your success encourages us all.
    KEEP PUNCHING!
  • Tators
    Tators Posts: 75
    Thanks to all the people who actually took the time to read what I posted...and didn't twist it into all sorts of negativity.

    Sometimes it makes me sad to know so many people jump to the negative and come to their own conclusions about a complete stranger.

    I thought this was supposed to be a place where we could talk about how we felt and what we were going through during weight loss without judgment.

    Please...if you are looking to judge and point fingers and make assumptions and tell me how terrible I am go elsewhere.

    :drinker: :flowerforyou: :wink:

    Absolutely
  • HotCuppaJo
    HotCuppaJo Posts: 476 Member
    Is it just me...or do you start to get slightly annoyed when people CONTINUOUSLY comment on the weight you've lost?? At first it was great...but now I can't help thinking...DID I LOOK THAT BAD BEFORE??? lol....just a little Friday venting...

    NOPE....it never gets old to me!! I love and appreciate their kind words of support and encouragement. It keeps me motivated. I :heart: them for noticing.
  • Sbehlmer
    Sbehlmer Posts: 464 Member
    seems no pleasing some people... :laugh:

    some complain because you comment... some complain because you don't say anything... damned if you do - damned if you don't.

    Perfectly said!! :laugh:
  • CookieCrumble
    CookieCrumble Posts: 221 Member
    Is it just me...or do you start to get slightly annoyed when people CONTINUOUSLY comment on the weight you've lost?? At first it was great...but now I can't help thinking...DID I LOOK THAT BAD BEFORE??? lol....just a little Friday venting...

    I know what you mean, it can be a bit of a double-edge sword to hear, "Oh your bottom looks so curvy now", and you hear the unspoken after-words of, "It looked like a sack of potatoes before...". :embarassed:

    I always feel like this when somebody says, "You look so beautiful today, that top/dress/whatever really suits you"... it makes me wonder, whether I looked like a bag lady before... :sad:
  • drgregdc
    drgregdc Posts: 22 Member
    Flattery is dead
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