One of my closest friends cheated
KristaPetraitis
Posts: 38 Member
in Chit-Chat
Ok, so one of my closest friends just texted me to tell me that she cheated on her boyfriend with her ex. She told her boyfriend about it, and his deal is that she has to tell all of her close friends, hence the message.
I just want to say I want to choke her right about now. She's always been attracted to toxic guys and toxic situations. Her and her ex broke up back in March (kinda mutual), so a few weeks later, I had the idea to set her up with a friend. Really nice guy. Well, right after setting them up, her ex came by to pick up his things, and they slept together. This was after we had talked about how he was a liar and no one liked him and everything.
So fast forward a few months, her and her current boyfriend have been dating for a few weeks. I met him for the first time last week and I automatically approved (first guy I have approved of, actually). He is what she has been needing. I was pretty excited for her. Well, then the text happened. All the details I know so far is that her ex came over. She kept trying to get him to leave. He kept pushing her to sleep together, and then, well, they slept together. She completely regrets it. And she doesn't just sleep around or anything just for the fun of it. She wants the fairy tale relationship with the perfect guy and blah blah blah, but she is making the wrong decisions in pursuing that dream.
I'm seeing her tonight, so I'm planning on laying down some tough love. Has anyone else ever dealt with anything like this before?
I just want to say I want to choke her right about now. She's always been attracted to toxic guys and toxic situations. Her and her ex broke up back in March (kinda mutual), so a few weeks later, I had the idea to set her up with a friend. Really nice guy. Well, right after setting them up, her ex came by to pick up his things, and they slept together. This was after we had talked about how he was a liar and no one liked him and everything.
So fast forward a few months, her and her current boyfriend have been dating for a few weeks. I met him for the first time last week and I automatically approved (first guy I have approved of, actually). He is what she has been needing. I was pretty excited for her. Well, then the text happened. All the details I know so far is that her ex came over. She kept trying to get him to leave. He kept pushing her to sleep together, and then, well, they slept together. She completely regrets it. And she doesn't just sleep around or anything just for the fun of it. She wants the fairy tale relationship with the perfect guy and blah blah blah, but she is making the wrong decisions in pursuing that dream.
I'm seeing her tonight, so I'm planning on laying down some tough love. Has anyone else ever dealt with anything like this before?
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Replies
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Yes I did. she was my "friend".. Cheated on her husband with a guy who is a drug dealer, scum bag..etc. She lied to me telling me her husband had abused her, cheated on her..etc. All lies. They have a daughter too. I don't really have advice because some people on here can be friends with someone like that. I can not. What she has done to her husband, daughter and family sickens me to the point that I want to physically attack her.
Good luck tonight. Just be prepared to lose her friendship because some times people think if you are not on their side in situations like this you are not a TRUE friend which is not the case.0 -
Well, I'm hoping that since I've been completely honest with her with what I've thought of her relationships in the past, if won't affect our friendship. She really didn't have the best examples of what a good man is. Her step dad beat her, while her mom did nothing about it. I just wished she'd know a good thing when she saw one.0
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How old is your friend? Maybe she just need to " grow up"?0
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Sounds like your friend is a pushover and will just give any guy what they want.
Her : NO I won't sleep with you!!!
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: Okay fine *kitten* me. Who cares that I have a boyfriend.0 -
Sounds like your friend is a pushover and will just give any guy what they want.
Her : NO I won't sleep with you!!!
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: Okay fine *kitten* me. Who cares that I have a boyfriend.
http://youtu.be/ayXy2gkuBgc
See that? 50 no's and a yes, means yes.0 -
I think it's really weird and ridiculous that he told her she had to tell all of her friends about it.... shaming your partner isn't exactly a healthy way to deal with relationship problems...
What's going to happen when you all graduate from West Beverly Hills High and this stuff doesn't fly any more??0 -
Sounds like your friend is a pushover and will just give any guy what they want.
Her : NO I won't sleep with you!!!
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: Okay fine *kitten* me. Who cares that I have a boyfriend.
http://youtu.be/ayXy2gkuBgc
See that? 50 no's and a yes, means yes.
50? In this scenario it was only 5!0 -
I think it's really weird and ridiculous that he told her she had to tell all of her friends about it.... shaming your partner isn't exactly a healthy way to deal with relationship problems...
What's going to happen when you all graduate from West Beverly Hills High and this stuff doesn't fly any more??0 -
He will dump her, have sex with LOTS of sluty and prettier women, and then rub it in her face...point of it all? She's stupid0
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420
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Thats her punishment?? To tell all her friends...LOL. She must have s**ty friends. I Cheated in the past and all told my friends and all they wanted was details..lol. Whatever. Its her life and there nothing you can do or say to her. If your her true friend you'll just say "well that was dumb..but move on and try to be better, ill be here for you no matter what" My best friend cheated on her ex husband and i will be there for her till i die. She my sister, and while she did some stupid *kitten* in the past, i dont judge her. She did the same for me. Now we are both older and wiser and in stable, loving relationships with kids. Even if she did it again (heaven forbid) i would just hug her and be there for her, of course adding that shes a dumb *kitten*.0
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A ho is a ho0
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A ho is a ho
fo sho0 -
Thats her punishment?? To tell all her friends...LOL. She must have s**ty friends. I Cheated in the past and all told my friends and all they wanted was details..lol. Whatever. Its her life and there nothing you can do or say to her. If your her true friend you'll just say "well that was dumb..but move on and try to be better, ill be here for you no matter what" My best friend cheated on her ex husband and i will be there for her till i die. She my sister, and while she did some stupid *kitten* in the past, i dont judge her. She did the same for me. Now we are both older and wiser and in stable, loving relationships with kids. Even if she did it again (heaven forbid) i would just hug her and be there for her, of course adding that shes a dumb *kitten*.
I think I might love you.0 -
A ho is a ho
fo sho
love the sense of humor...**** happens0 -
Be cool.0
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Sounds like your friend is a pushover and will just give any guy what they want.
Her : NO I won't sleep with you!!!
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: NO.
Him: Please?
Her: Okay fine *kitten* me. Who cares that I have a boyfriend.
http://youtu.be/ayXy2gkuBgc
See that? 50 no's and a yes, means yes.
50? In this scenario it was only 5!
Then she's 10x easier to get! =D0 -
I dont care if the cheater was my best friend.....I couldn't look at him the same way again.0
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Ok, so one of my closest friends just texted me to tell me that she cheated on her boyfriend with her ex. She told her boyfriend about it, and his deal is that she has to tell all of her close friends, hence the message.
He forgave her as long as she tells everyone what she did? They deserve each other.0 -
Ok, so one of my closest friends just texted me to tell me that she cheated on her boyfriend with her ex. She told her boyfriend about it, and his deal is that she has to tell all of her close friends, hence the message.
I just want to say I want to choke her right about now. She's always been attracted to toxic guys and toxic situations. Her and her ex broke up back in March (kinda mutual), so a few weeks later, I had the idea to set her up with a friend. Really nice guy. Well, right after setting them up, her ex came by to pick up his things, and they slept together. This was after we had talked about how he was a liar and no one liked him and everything.
So fast forward a few months, her and her current boyfriend have been dating for a few weeks. I met him for the first time last week and I automatically approved (first guy I have approved of, actually). He is what she has been needing. I was pretty excited for her. Well, then the text happened. All the details I know so far is that her ex came over. She kept trying to get him to leave. He kept pushing her to sleep together, and then, well, they slept together. She completely regrets it. And she doesn't just sleep around or anything just for the fun of it. She wants the fairy tale relationship with the perfect guy and blah blah blah, but she is making the wrong decisions in pursuing that dream.
I'm seeing her tonight, so I'm planning on laying down some tough love. Has anyone else ever dealt with anything like this before?
If she is your friend then listen to her, if she ASK offer her your opinion, I don't agree with giving unsolicited tough love or advice.
Just based on the things you have said about her ..I get why she is behaving that way..not that its right..
If anything you may want to further investigate her current boyfriend..because ..who does that...Ill stay with you but your punishment is you must confess your sins to all your close friends...REALLY!!..but you approve of this one..to me that type of attitude speaks of abuse, control and manipulation...0 -
Thats her punishment?? To tell all her friends...LOL. She must have s**ty friends. I Cheated in the past and all told my friends and all they wanted was details..lol. Whatever. Its her life and there nothing you can do or say to her. If your her true friend you'll just say "well that was dumb..but move on and try to be better, ill be here for you no matter what" My best friend cheated on her ex husband and i will be there for her till i die. She my sister, and while she did some stupid *kitten* in the past, i dont judge her. She did the same for me. Now we are both older and wiser and in stable, loving relationships with kids. Even if she did it again (heaven forbid) i would just hug her and be there for her, of course adding that shes a dumb *kitten*.0
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I think it's really weird and ridiculous that he told her she had to tell all of her friends about it.... shaming your partner isn't exactly a healthy way to deal with relationship problems...
What's going to happen when you all graduate from West Beverly Hills High and this stuff doesn't fly any more??
LMAO0 -
Thats her punishment?? To tell all her friends...LOL. She must have s**ty friends. I Cheated in the past and all told my friends and all they wanted was details..lol. Whatever. Its her life and there nothing you can do or say to her. If your her true friend you'll just say "well that was dumb..but move on and try to be better, ill be here for you no matter what" My best friend cheated on her ex husband and i will be there for her till i die. She my sister, and while she did some stupid *kitten* in the past, i dont judge her. She did the same for me. Now we are both older and wiser and in stable, loving relationships with kids. Even if she did it again (heaven forbid) i would just hug her and be there for her, of course adding that shes a dumb *kitten*.
S**t, if my BF need help getting rid of a body, id be there in a heartbeat... but that in no way is a confession :glasses:0 -
Ok, so one of my closest friends just texted me to tell me that she cheated on her boyfriend with her ex. She told her boyfriend about it, and his deal is that she has to tell all of her close friends, hence the message.
He forgave her as long as she tells everyone what she did? They deserve each other.
^^ AGREE! Why can they not be gown up and work it out on their own. How many people are in their relationship? Crazy. They do deserve each other.0 -
Thats her punishment?? To tell all her friends...LOL. She must have s**ty friends. I Cheated in the past and all told my friends and all they wanted was details..lol. Whatever. Its her life and there nothing you can do or say to her. If your her true friend you'll just say "well that was dumb..but move on and try to be better, ill be here for you no matter what" My best friend cheated on her ex husband and i will be there for her till i die. She my sister, and while she did some stupid *kitten* in the past, i dont judge her. She did the same for me. Now we are both older and wiser and in stable, loving relationships with kids. Even if she did it again (heaven forbid) i would just hug her and be there for her, of course adding that shes a dumb *kitten*.
S**t, if my BF need help getting rid of a body, id be there in a heartbeat... but that in no way is a confession :glasses:0 -
OMG, the advice you should give your friend is to run screaming from the current boyfriend. She ****** up. It isn't cool but she did tell him and now he is punishing her and trying to make all her friends mad at her so that she is isolated. Plus, this relationship has not even been going on for that long.
Your friend needs to value herself as more than just someone's ****buddy. She isn't going to grow self-respect from some tough love. That only will come when she starts to see that she is worth more than a casual romp.0 -
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And don't forget your towel.0 -
Yep, with family members and friends. I was a bit disapointed, but they are still my relation / friend and regardless of what they do (bar unjustified murder) I will be there for them. I would not post their tale on a public forum, but maybe I am bit old fashioned.0
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S**t, if my BF need help getting rid of a body, id be there in a heartbeat... but that in no way is a confession :glasses:0
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