Discouraged

Your husband sounds like not a very nice bloke.

keep going. nothing should get through your determination. do it for yourself, cause no one else will.

I can really relate to you about the no support system. My husband doesn't have a weight issue and doesn't understand the problem at all. He can eat anything and does right in front of me. I have type 2 diabetes and he says, "well then just don't eat it". I want to slap him!!! I am 62 yrs old and it is very hard to break old habits, but I am going to try my best.

Never give up. My husband eats nothing but crap...He will not even eat fruit, veggies, or even pasta...WEIRD...
This journey has been all about me and continues too be....For me, this journey isn't about loosing weight, anymore. I want to be strong and athletic, also. You should be proud of what you have accomplished, thus far. :flowerforyou:

We can't expect the whole world to flip just because we change. Your husband is not at fault one bit. He's just being who he is.
And here is the scary part.:noway:
You may grow apart, and at some point, you may re-evaluate the whole relationship.
Decide now if that's a possibility, and govern yourself accordingly.
Keep striving toward your goals.
There may come a time when your husband is totally supportive.
Your NEXT husband - :smokin:

change up your exercise routine

Too much to ask? Definitely not. We all deserve support. Hard to get to? Sometimes.

Sorry you are so discouraged but the weight loss you've done already is pretty wonderful.

What did you do it get that far?

Also . . . is your husband insecure that if you become slimmer you will become more attractive to other men and leave him? Is he jealous? Either jealous of your progress or worried about you growing away from him? In the short term, you might try being as reassuring and loving as possible because sometimes nasty, unsupportive behavior stems from insecurity. Although I always hesitate to recommend family counseling, it's something you might consider. Through a minister if you aren't comfortable with or can't afford a family therapist.

Finally, would it be easier for you, less divisive for your family, and healthier for everyone long term if you made one family meal that included both things you could eat and also things they want and you don't want to eat? Put out your food with theirs, eat what you usually do, and see if anyone else wants to try it. Maybe even grab small portions of food you normally shun but cook for them. I've learned a lot about healthy eating from my kids - and kids only learn to eat healthy through exposure.

Now this is just me, and I've been married to the same overgrown teenager for 39 years. He tells me last year when his doctor told him change his ways or die that the reason he always sabatoged my weight loss was to keep me, he was pretty insecure I guess. But then he followed that with help me fix me and you just go ahead and fix you too, lol. So, it may take a lot of patience if you want to keep your overgrown teenager but you should make this about you becoming the smart, fit, sexy you that you want. Then let nature take it's course.

I have been trying to lose weight for a while but I dont have an support system. Since Oct 2011 I lost 41lbs total. I workout and eat healthy but its not consistent.I told my hubby I want to lose another 20 and he flat out told me to give it up because I have been trying for so long to drop the lbs.

This really hurt and when I went to the gym I couldnt even do 10 min on the elliptical.

I have been told that number of times too, but that doesn't mean I quit trying, now does that? My favorite quote nowadays is "Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time."

Also, it's not just about losing weight but having a healthy lifestyle. When you eat right, you feel right....you have immunity to fight diseases and live longer. Excess fat, clog arteries...now that's enough reason to eat healthy, right? Cardio makes the heart stronger....it can take more of stress. Exercise releases endorphins, which makes one feel happier....oh I know chocolate can do the same trick :-) But you know what I mean, right?

About the elliptical....you know what my status message was 3 weeks ago ? I think it would be self explanatory.

"There was a time when I used to feel I would have a semi-heart attack on the elliptical in just about 7 minutes and now I get on the elliptical and start exercising and reduce the strides only because of the fear of getting an actual heart attack since I see my heart rate becoming 180+. 30 minutes passes by quite easily now!! "

Take baby steps, one step at a time and it will build up.

Start having healthier snacks at home...like string cheese, yogurt....eat small meals and in between have your healthier snacks.

You can do whatever you set your mind to. You are a strong, brave, and capable person and you are moving toward your goals in every moment. What people say should always take a backseat to how you feel. How do you feel when you exercise and eat healthy? You feel good, right? So forget the numbers, ignore the "you can't do it"s and focus on doing what it takes to feel good. You can feel good today. You can feel good tomorrow. You can feel good for the rest of your life, and the weight will come off naturally as you take good care of yourself.

I have a lot of trouble exercising too - asthma runs in my family and I have anxiety problems. I often get panic attacks when my heart rate goes up and it is very difficult to continue exercising. I can't even swim 20 laps yet, LOL. I would suggest taking baby steps - set a longterm goal, for example, 30 minutes on the elliptical, and work toward it in 30-second intervals (this workout you spend ten minutes, next time 10:30, the next workout 11:00, etc.) It's a good way to slowly build up to your goals without pushing yourself so hard that you're sore for a week. I tack 2 laps on to every swimming trip on my way to 100. Baby steps!

Your husband's behavior really strikes me as alarming, though. Is he overweight himself and insecure that he might lose you if you get too "out of his league" physically? Is he annoyed by the fact that you won't eat certain foods with him because certain foods or restaurants are part of your family tradition (pizza night or date night for example)? Is he controlling or abusive in any other aspect of the relationship? I would suggest having a serious open conversation with him explaining how you feel and trying to get some insight on why he feels how he feels.

I really believe that your significant other should not be attempting to stand in the way of things you consider important, and that he wouldn't be if he knew how important it was to you and got a chance to air out what was really bothering him about your choice.

Yeah, Im not trying to force my diet on my husband. I am in this for me. I cook his dinner and my dinner separate. Its just that he is so not supportive. He tries his best to make me miss my zumba classes or go to the gym period. I do any and everything he ask but I just ask let me have an hour a day for me. Is that too much to ask?

Get up before he wakes up, even if you really don't want to. Its easier for me to go when no one is around to stop me. I always feel so much better about it.

Don't be discourage....losing weight is super hard and you're doing an amazing job! I bet deep down your hubby is absolutely proud of you and what you've accomplished thus far! I think he doesn't want to support you because he's scared of change. Your relationship will change, he's thinking you're going to get all skinny and have even more men hit on you and make you imagine other possibilites without him or make you realize that you made a mistake marrying him (not that it's a mistake,,,,,that just seems to be how some mens brains work lol) bottom line.....change is scary especially when it's your wife that is changing and not him! Talk to him and try to sort through the man/ego/scared crap. But don't give up!!!!

Husbands do this! As soon as I say the word "diet" he brings home Boston creme donuts ( notice the plural on that). Men are secure in the way things are, and are afraid of change. They think if you make yourself better- they may have to do something to make themselves better. I think my husband is is jealous of my will power and tries to break it down.

Anyways He does seam to like it because I tend to get savvy in the kitchen trying new recipes/ spices and things. So I am always trying to think up things that he might like also and he has been very receptive- I hope to bring over from the dark side for his health ( but he is is own person so I do not force it). Ultimately he is a pizza/ burger man though. I try to make his favorites, for him weekly also, I just do not partake.

Ultimately the spoil the diet thing has to do with his insecurity so I just try to stoke his ego a little more.