Please stop staring at me...

kmm7309
kmm7309 Posts: 802 Member
in Motivation and Support
Okay, so I've lost almost 40 pounds, and it's pretty freakin' noticeable. Apparently. I say this because people at my college constantly stare at me and point in my direction, and this has not happened before. I don't have boogers in my nose, or a bad hair day... I have a problem with not fitting into my own clothes any more.

Has anyone else had this problem- where you are at a transitional weight, trying to wait until your clothes fall off before investing in clothes you hope you will be too big for in a few months?

Maybe I'm just super self-conscious (who isn't?) and mis-reading their actions, but I've never had this issue. I feel like a bad joke.

Does anyone know any way to make it through this crappy middle-point?
«1

Replies

  • victoria4321
    victoria4321 Posts: 1,719 Member
    It's a pretty big change and they probably think you're looking better lately.
  • MaraDiaz
    MaraDiaz Posts: 4,604 Member
    It seems odd that they would just stare but not say anything.
  • kmm7309
    kmm7309 Posts: 802 Member
    It seems odd that they would just stare but not say anything.

    These aren't people who know me... they are just other students.
  • iKapuniai
    iKapuniai Posts: 594 Member
    If you care about what they're saying/thinking of you, suck it up and buy some clothes.

    If you don't care, then just don't care. Simple as that.

    Always walk with your head held high and let them talk, stare, point and whisper. Doesn't matter, so don't let it bother you, and definitely don't let it bring you down.

    Love and Alohas,
    Ihilani Kapuniai
  • rainsrabble
    rainsrabble Posts: 7
    40 pounds is a LOT. Congratulations. You should be proud. And I'm sure you want to keep your eye on the prize and keep going for your target weight. But you also need to feel good about how you look right now or you might lose your motivation. Besides, looking good feels good. So break out ten bucks and hit your second hand shop. Buy some stuff that fits. You will feel better and wont feel like people are staring at you because of your over sized clothes. Make it one of your rewards. Every time you drop ten pounds go to the second hand store. It can be a ritual where you drop off the bigger clothes that you don't intend to ever wear again.
  • meechi53
    meechi53 Posts: 195 Member
    Ebay and Consignment stores..you should be able to get some nice pieces that won't break the bank. I've found that dresses "transition" better than pants. You can always belt dresses or blouses/tees for a slimming/hourglass look.
  • kmm7309
    kmm7309 Posts: 802 Member
    I just talked to my husband, and he's giving me thrift shop clothes money in two weeks. Yay! I don't have a job (I go to school double-full time) so I have to ask and it seemed kind of selfish earlier to me... :blushing:
  • MermaidFaith
    MermaidFaith Posts: 495 Member
    yard sales are my saving grace. Seriously have used them to get new wardrobes for 5 size decreases, and have prob spent 100 dollars total. nothing like paying 1 dollar for a cute pair of aeropostale jeans,
  • rainsrabble
    rainsrabble Posts: 7
    Yeah for the husband :)
  • Momma_Grizz
    Momma_Grizz Posts: 294 Member
    I would wear my clothes as long as I could as well and would get a few awkward stares. I use to visit second hand clothes stores to purchase my 'transition' clothes (many times) and then would donate my too large clothes back to them. Try that if you can.
  • kmoore02
    kmoore02 Posts: 167 Member
    I don't want to buy new clothes yet but I did go shopping to see if could find something. I'll just let these clothes become baggy a little while longer. I still have about 80lbs I want to lose so I'm just not ready to invest yet.
  • kmm7309
    kmm7309 Posts: 802 Member
    I don't want to buy new clothes yet but I did go shopping to see if could find something. I'll just let these clothes become baggy a little while longer. I still have about 80lbs I want to lose so I'm just not ready to invest yet.

    See that's my problem too. I have so far to go. Another 80 pounds at least!
  • marywanoKC
    marywanoKC Posts: 176
    Resale shops are your friend. It sucks spending $50 on a pair of jeans that, in two months, w on't fit. And I still have to buy my bras new, so yay, there's $40- $50/piece new unless there's a sale (which I hunt for). I actually just got $120 in rewards checks today from Lane Bryant because I've spent so much there in the last few months. And I hated shopping. Hated. Shopping.

    Seriously, find the good shops in your area, and haunt them looking for quality pieces for cheap. then, when you out-lose them, you can gift them to someone else.
  • kdeaux1959
    kdeaux1959 Posts: 2,675 Member
    I understand the situation. I have been there; usually, I try to skip a size when I can but making a balance between what is necessary (especially when employed) and what can be worked with... It may be that they are pointing to show how much you have lost.

    Some options may be to try to get your clothes at a discount store, dollar store or thrift store. When in transition, choose transitional clothes... Not the most expensive lines.

    I would never suggest trying to go more than 2 sizes... (48 to 44 for instance is enough).. Going more than that would be too much.

    Best wishes on your continued losses!
  • jsukhan
    jsukhan Posts: 149 Member
    I feel your pain, I lost 30 lbs and my suits were falling off me. But I didn't have money to take get all of them taken in. I don't work in that field anymore but I still might get them tailored eventually.
  • Christine1110
    Christine1110 Posts: 1,786 Member
    Good for you...I have gone from a tight size 18 to a size 4 a size 3X top to a small. I have bought my clothes for the most part from the Goodwill..or another used stores. I didn't want to waste money on clothes I wan't going to stay in. I have found alot of designer jeans, for 5.99 to 9.99
  • RaeN81
    RaeN81 Posts: 534 Member
    Congrats on your loss! Since losing weight can be a long process, I think it is important to reward yourself along the way. Maybe you don't need an entirely new wardrobe (sometimes a good belt can do the trick or a sewing machine) but a couple of nice pieces to show the progress you are making is worth the investment and will encourage you as you go. Consignment stores, second hand and garage sales can be so nice. Also, sometimes a friend or family member is cleaning out their closet and you can get some great new to you stuff!!
  • nerdmaker
    nerdmaker Posts: 8
    The last time I lost weight like that I went shopping at secondhand stores and yard sales. If you buy a few good pieces that fit better it seems to make the oversize stuff look better. I bought pants and skirts because the oversize shirt look was in. The thing I discovered after losing weight is that most people who stare want to say something positive like "you sure have lost a lot of weight" but were too afraid to say anything in case you're sensitive. I started telling them about my diet then how much weight I'd lost. The relief in their eyes were obvious because I'd opened the door to the discussion.
  • likeschocolate
    likeschocolate Posts: 368 Member
    Congratulations on your weight loss -- the stares say you're doing well. Best wishes for the future!!
  • spiregrain
    spiregrain Posts: 254 Member
    Buy a lot of somewhat flowy stuff with stretch -- it will last you through a bunch of sizes as you plummet. I look for stuff on clearance at Target, but I am a SAHM and have no one to impress!
  • gussie1026
    gussie1026 Posts: 20 Member
    DONT ASSUME THE NEGATIVE!! (we all do, it's human nature, I think.) I'll bet they are say "WOW, Look at KMMM!!" Has she lost weight or what??" They are all trying to figure out what you've done and they don't know you well enough to just come up to you and as. Just smile smuggly!! YOU KNOW A SECRET!! I didn't buy any new clothes until I hit the 40 mark, and then people started giving me clothes, plus I hit Goodwill and other thrift stores. It's amazing what you can get there, but you might have to go regularly to catch the good stuff. Up to that point I was wearing a string around my waist to hold my pants up! (Under my shirt of course!)
    YOU GO, GIRL!!
  • Jalare
    Jalare Posts: 103
    I've gone from size 24 to 16 so far. I love to shop so I use online sites that have really good clearance sales and Goodwill has become a favorite. I think feeling good in your own skin starts with feeling good in your clothes.
  • littlelaurie14
    littlelaurie14 Posts: 224 Member
    I almost guarantee they're all pointing and staring thinking "Wow, she's lost weight, hasn't she?" rather than "Oh emm geee, she needs a new wardrobe" lol.. Be proud! And good to hear you're gunna get some better fitting clothes, even though at the rate you're going, you'll probably be out of them soon (yay thrift stores/yardales!)
    Congrats on those 40!
  • annabellj
    annabellj Posts: 1,337 Member
    goodwill people! dollar days are thursdays! It takes a while to get used to shopping there(I have some snobby friends that wont go with me) and you have to have time to do it cuz you have to weed thru a lot of crap. but, most of my clothes are from there, except jeans and undergarments of course! but my costumes only cost two bucks! most of my cute clothes that people compliment me on now are from goodwill. go on a thursday and you can get a few outfits for less than ten bucks if it is bothering you. i say it is worth it, 40 lbs is a huge loss! congratulations!
  • vladamisa
    vladamisa Posts: 72 Member
    yea go to goodwill or savers whichever you have or both they have good priced clothes and sales alot i buy materials for costumes there and occasionally a new dress it will make u feel tons bettter knowing your new size also you may pick up something to small just to have that as a goal to fit into if its about 20% cooler ;)
  • MaraDiaz
    MaraDiaz Posts: 4,604 Member
    It seems odd that they would just stare but not say anything.

    These aren't people who know me... they are just other students.

    Even so, you would think with all the staring they do, at least one would have the guts to walk up all friendly like and say, "Hey, you've lost a lot of weight, haven't you? You look great!" Or "How did you do it?"

    But people are pretty weird like that, I guess. No one around here keeps their eyes to themselves and not many will say anything either, come to think of it. Got a bunch of starers in the deep south. :laugh:
  • nicholettebell
    nicholettebell Posts: 414
    Haha! Been there, done that. I personally cannot shop at thrift stores because I have this "thing" in which I cannot bring myself to wear something that belonged to someone I don't know. However, I am broke ALL THE TIME because I can't get over that aversion to pre worn clothing. I hit the clearance aisles everywhere. So if you can do the thrift store, do it! Way to go on your loss so far!
  • kenmunson333
    kenmunson333 Posts: 51 Member
    When I started seriously losing weight I was kind of disappointed that no one at my office seemed to notice. There I was, losing weight as fast as I could, clothes getting looser and looser, having to buy new wardrobes every 2 or 3 months and no one seemed notice or even care. Many months into my journey, I finally found out they'd all been talking, just not to me! Everyone assumed I was sick and they were only asking my boss what was going, was it cancer, etc? LOL. Thankfully, he just assured them i was ok and told them if they really needed to know they should ask me.
  • knk121
    knk121 Posts: 26
    Wrap dresses are amazing for this. I'll reiterate the above poster who said that dresses are great. I'm about a size 12 right now but I still can wear a size 6 dress that I got in skinnier days. They're magical that way.
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
    Consignment shops and goodwill :)

Categories