Kids say the darndest things...

MissAnjy
MissAnjy Posts: 2,480 Member
edited December 26 in Chit-Chat
Everyone is always telling me that I should write a book. My kids, say the darndest things.....every day (as i'm sure most do). My kids, can be pretty outrageously funny.

Last night, I had the following conversation with my 3 year old son.

Him: Mom, how did I get into your belly?
Me: Well son, I think you're a little too young to be hearing about the birds and the bees just yet, but i'll tell you this much. Sometimes, when a boy and a girl love eachother, they make a baby.
Him: Mom, I love you....and I want to make a baby.

*facepalm*

Here's to hoping he doesn't repeat that at school.
«1

Replies

  • JennaM222
    JennaM222 Posts: 1,996 Member
    hahahaha!!!
  • morganhccstudent724
    morganhccstudent724 Posts: 1,261 Member
    Yesterday, my neice and I were driving. A guy drove by us and smiled into the car. The conversation was as follows:

    Madison: Who was that guy?
    Me: What guy?
    Mad: The one who drove by and smiled at you.
    Me: I don't know who he is.
    Mad: Huh...must have been smiling at me then...:laugh:
  • autumnk921
    autumnk921 Posts: 1,374 Member
    Everyone is always telling me that I should write a book. My kids, say the darndest things.....every day (as i'm sure most do). My kids, can be pretty outrageously funny.

    Last night, I had the following conversation with my 3 year old son.

    Him: Mom, how did I get into your belly?
    Me: Well son, I think you're a little too young to be hearing about the birds and the bees just yet, but i'll tell you this much. Sometimes, when a boy and a girl love eachother, they make a baby.
    Him: Mom, I love you....and I want to make a baby.

    *facepalm*

    Here's to hoping he doesn't repeat that at school.


    That is too funny!!! :laugh: I know I am going to end up having the same coversation with my son some day...Oh no!!:laugh:
  • carebear7951
    carebear7951 Posts: 404 Member
    Oh my goodness! Hilarious! And I hope too (for your sake) that he doesn't repeat that at school Yikes!
  • amymt10
    amymt10 Posts: 271 Member
    that is fuuny!!!! My 6yr has asked the very same question.... I told him god put him there becuase mommy & daddy love each other and wanted a baby. Of course then he wants to know how he got out of my belly. That's where I'm glad I had a csection!! I just told him the dr cut him out.

    So god put him there, dr cut him out!!! so simple.... well for now. lol
  • JennaM222
    JennaM222 Posts: 1,996 Member
    Yesterday, my neice and I were driving. A guy drove by us and smiled into the car. The conversation was as follows:

    Madison: Who was that guy?
    Me: What guy?
    Mad: The one who drove by and smiled at you.
    Me: I don't know who he is.
    Mad: Huh...must have been smiling at me then...:laugh:

    hahaha!!! LOVE
  • jesshall281
    jesshall281 Posts: 219
    Everyone is always telling me that I should write a book. My kids, say the darndest things.....every day (as i'm sure most do). My kids, can be pretty outrageously funny.

    Last night, I had the following conversation with my 3 year old son.

    Him: Mom, how did I get into your belly?
    Me: Well son, I think you're a little too young to be hearing about the birds and the bees just yet, but i'll tell you this much. Sometimes, when a boy and a girl love eachother, they make a baby.
    Him: Mom, I love you....and I want to make a baby.

    *facepalm*

    Here's to hoping he doesn't repeat that at school.

    That is truly adorable!!
  • leomom72
    leomom72 Posts: 1,797 Member
    my kids are just random, and i cant remember much of the things they say at the moment
  • mickipedia
    mickipedia Posts: 889 Member
    I was babysitting and the little boy (who is about 8) was listening to Lady Gaga on the radio.. He then asked me what a 'Disco Stick' was.. I then said "Jake, the song is called 'Lovegame' do you want to ask any more questions?"

    It took him about 2 minutes to realise what I meant and then shouted "euurrgghh!!"
  • leomom72
    leomom72 Posts: 1,797 Member
    Everyone is always telling me that I should write a book. My kids, say the darndest things.....every day (as i'm sure most do). My kids, can be pretty outrageously funny.

    Last night, I had the following conversation with my 3 year old son.

    Him: Mom, how did I get into your belly?
    Me: Well son, I think you're a little too young to be hearing about the birds and the bees just yet, but i'll tell you this much. Sometimes, when a boy and a girl love eachother, they make a baby.
    Him: Mom, I love you....and I want to make a baby.

    *facepalm*

    Here's to hoping he doesn't repeat that at school.

    proof you need to choose your words wisely :laugh:
  • vernoe65
    vernoe65 Posts: 4
    :laugh: I got a real kick out of that!
  • sho3girl
    sho3girl Posts: 10,799 Member
    ** like ***
  • coraliethomas
    coraliethomas Posts: 336 Member
    LOL!!

    We were flying back from Canada once, and my hubby was going to meet us at the airport... so my daughter is really anxious to see her daddy again, and I tell her he will be there waiting for us when we get to the other airport.

    WELL.... I forgot to mention the fact that we had a stop in salt lake city first... we get off the airplane and there is this guy standing there fidgeting with his cell phone, and in my then 3 year old's defense, he kinda looked a little like my hubby. Suddenly my daughter breaks away from me, goes running towards this guys yelling "DAAADDDDDYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!" and wraps herself around his leg. This poor guy looked like a deer caught in headlights!! I just wanted to melt into the floor!! He looks at her and says "Im not your daddy!" and scuttled off....

    Rather awkward.
  • AlbaAngel25
    AlbaAngel25 Posts: 484 Member
    That is freaking hilarious !!! lol
  • Amryfal
    Amryfal Posts: 225
    LMAO!

    my sons live with their dad during the school year. they came out a couple summers ago and when i picked them up at the airport, my middle son said, "MOM! YOU GOT SHORTER!"

    no, sweetie, you got taller. logic, 7 year old has it >.<

    this was the same child who almost got expelled from preschool for saying the F-word. *mom puts duct tape over her own mouth* oops...
  • Sorrycharlie2007
    Sorrycharlie2007 Posts: 66 Member
    That is great
  • kariebo
    kariebo Posts: 101
    lol awesome. My son asked how i was going to get the baby out of my belly and how i would know she was ready. I told him that the baby would let me know when she didnt have anymore room to grow and that I would go to the hospital and the doctor would help me get her out... and he asked.. how is the dr going to help?? and I replied, well, Mommy will be trying to get the baby out and the doctor will help... and then you can come see us. ... .. then I switched the subject...thats the best I could do in telling my 5 yr old how a baby is born without actually telling him...
  • mejiapatty
    mejiapatty Posts: 6
    LOL thats so FUNNY!

    my daughter tells me the craziest things to and she is 2. Am teaching her not to let no one see her parts or her booty. she is potty trained already and my 18 month old Sophia walks in on her as she is about to sit on the toilet and screams on top of her lungs, am thinking she is hurt, when i get there she is crying saying " mommy sophia is looking at my booty!"
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    This is why i love children. They are so god darn adorable. Everything is simple and they are so innocent.
  • Beleg
    Beleg Posts: 227 Member
    A conversation between my 10yrold and my 5 yr old.

    10yrold: I'm hot
    5yrold: are you sweating hot or dating hot
  • jcjsjones
    jcjsjones Posts: 571 Member
    A conversation I had with my son when he was 4 (he is now 11).

    Me: You are so good looking!
    Him: I know I am, Mom.
    Me: Where did I get such a good looking boy?
    Him: Duh, Mom. At the good looking boy store! LOL!
  • MissAnjy
    MissAnjy Posts: 2,480 Member
    A conversation between my 10yrold and my 5 yr old.

    10yrold: I'm hot
    5yrold: are you sweating hot or dating hot

    LMAO!!
  • MissAnjy
    MissAnjy Posts: 2,480 Member
    This is a conversation with the same son of mine (I have twins)

    Me: Babe, what do you want to eat?
    Him: I'm not Babe, I'm Jaxon.
    Me: I know your name Jaxon, I just called you Babe because it's cute, like a pet name.
    Him: A pet? I'm not a pet. Do I look like a dog or a cat to you?

    I cried laughing.
  • kd_mazur
    kd_mazur Posts: 569 Member
    My six yr old daughter and I were at a resteraunt with my sister:
    daughter: I'm going to the bathroom, you don't need to go I can go by myself
    My sister: No, girls never go to the bathroom alone. I'll go along.
    daughter: Why not?
    My sister: There might be a creeper in the bathroom and so we go together to be safe
    daughter: What's a creeper?
    My sister: That would be like a man in the girls room where he didn't belong
    daugher: oh

    two days later she went with her dad somewhere. Later that day when she returned home she informed me that she was a creeper today becuase she needed to go and daddy took her to the men's room instead of the ladies

    LMAO!
  • Discoveri
    Discoveri Posts: 435 Member
    My husband and I take care of my fake nieces (kids of close family friends) and one time they were staying at our house for the weekend. The youngest one fell asleep in the car and as she was being carried inside, she had the following exchange with my husband:

    Gracie: Am I Amish?
    Hubs: No, you aren't Amish.
    Gracie: Oh. *falls asleep again*

    Gracie also no longer wants to be a cowgirl because she misheard "herd animals" as "hurt animals".
  • MaritaD
    MaritaD Posts: 178 Member
    hahaha these are all so funny!!!

    I was hanging out with my cousins 3 year old a few months back and she helped me with something and I said
    "Thanks buddy"

    and she looked at me, dead serious look on her face and said
    "I am not a buddy! I am a girl" hahahaha

    My own daughter (almost 10) was grocery shopping with me the other day and we went down the pop/chip isle and she said "what are we doing down here? Are we having a party or something?" Made me feel pretty darn good about myself! haha
  • KellyKAG
    KellyKAG Posts: 418
    My Husband and 6 year old son, Joey:

    Husband: Joey why are you laying on the couch. You need to do your chores.
    Joey: well dad, Its because I'm kinda lazy like you....

    AWKWARD!!!!!
  • Bahet
    Bahet Posts: 1,254 Member
    I loved it when my boys were little and would say things like that. One time my mom asked my then 5 yr old what his little brother (2yrs old) would want for Christmas. He thought really hard then said "I think he'd like a door stop because he really hates it when mom shuts his door and he can't get out. (I had a doorknob cover on the inside knob.)

    I thought I would really miss those days but it turns out they continue for quite a while. Just a few months ago my 11 yr old (formerly known as the 2yr old who wanted a doorstop) and I were watching TV. A commercial for Cialis (erectile dysfunction medication) came on and he asked what that meant. I sighed but since he was almost 12 I told him exactly what that meant and what the medication did. He replied "DUDE!! That is MESSED UP!!" I about peed myself I laughed so hard.
  • sho3girl
    sho3girl Posts: 10,799 Member
    visting my godson he told me I looked hot .... I said it was cold outside so i was dressed up warmly.. he looks at me and goes no you look hot, sexy ... he was 11 at the time ! made my evening anyhow :smile:
  • Dragonnade
    Dragonnade Posts: 218 Member
    On Sunday I was at the cricket where you can, quite literally, drink from 10am till 7pm in the sun. And people do.

    Anyway, there was a kid behind me, about 10 or 11 I'd guess, who was clearly on his first trip to the cricket. All sorts of questions interspersed with "I'm bored" and farfetched wishes for an entertaining batting collapse. Until the crowd started making snakes from the empty beer glasses.

    Kid: "Why are they doing that?"
    Mother: "They're drunk"
    Kid: Have you ever been drunk mum?
    Mother: Yes dear.
    Kid: I want to be drunk one day.

    I missed the reply for giggling. Possibly not quite what his parents wanted him to take from a day out at £60 a ticket!
This discussion has been closed.

Categories