Called fat by a stranger.
Replies
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I'm sorry you had to experience that. People are so rude! But screw them, you are awesome!0
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I agree.....those children are punks and stupid...you are the smart and mature adult. Hang in there.Ignoring these kids is the best idea and remember they are kids, cursing back at them only affirms to them that cursing is okay. You're the adult, showing a better example is important, even if you're furious.
I don't know, I think they will be cursing anyways, cursing back and giving them a problem tells them that what their mouths do will have consequences, and people won't just put up with it and walk away, which is probably what they were hoping for. The kid backed off after she started giving him some feedback.0 -
I completely here you there 'lette. It's a struggle for all of us. I can tell you that the problem is not the kids but their parents. Too many "Best Friends" and not enough discipline at home! Just vent to your MFP "Family" We all understand where you're coming from.
This is so true. Parents these days don't seem to teach discipline and respect to their children.0 -
Ignoring these kids is the best idea and remember they are kids, cursing back at them only affirms to them that cursing is okay. You're the adult, showing a better example is important, even if you're furious.
^^ This.
I'm truly sorry something like that happened to you and I understand you probably reacted out of anger... but you have to remember that they are children.
I think this is part of the problem. "They are just kids" or "They are children". No wonder they know they can get away with acting like jerks!!!
I believe that if they are old enough to talk like adults and act like they are adults, then they are ready to be treated like one!
I agree with mandy, they are just children is a pretty poor excuse for not disciplining them and they will never learn unless there are consequences, better someone cussing them out than later on them mouthing off to a crazy person and getting their butts kicked................or worse.0 -
Like many, I agree that it's the parenting that's the problem. It's obvious that his parents didn't teach him how to respect others no matter what! I've personally never been call fat to my face by strangers, but I've had relatives tell me that I'm getting fat or I've gained a lot of weight! That I can deal with, but there was this one occasion when I was at work, sitting at my desk and a gentleman came in and wanted to sell me a photo package! He saw me from the window and thought that I was pretty, photogenic, and that he would love to take professional photos of me! Yeah, right, he'd say anything in order for me to buy his package! Anyway, after I politey declined the purchase anything, he asked, "Is it because you're pregnant? I can show you some great shots of women who were pregnant that did a photo shoot." What the hell!!
I looked down and saw my big fat-*kitten* stomach poking out like I was a six month prego! To say I was upset was an understatement, but I graciously said to him that I'm not pregnant! He apologized and turned beet red and thank me for my time and left my the office! Afterwards, I felt awful, wanted to cry and spent most of the day trying to suck in my fat-*kitten* belly! Although I've lost some weight since that happened, I still look down from time to time to see if anyone else walked into the office, would they mistake me for being pregnant!
That guy should NOT be in sales.
I couldn't agree more! You don't make assumptions like that!0 -
"This is the reason I don't want kids"
REALLY? Those children are a product of their awful upbringing not how children should be viewed in general. It was totally wrong and rude for that child/person to call you any name at all but to categorize ALL children as being evil is just wrong in itself.
Sorry it just bugged me, I have 2 wonderful children 7 and 3 and they would never ever call a stranger fat or any other name for that matter.0 -
I've had a few nasty comments too (I made a blog post about it here: http://losingitallwithmfp.wordpress.com/2012/04/20/nasty-comments/)
The people who make those comments must have really sad lives if they have to make us feel bad in order to feel better about themselves.0 -
A guy from XEROX came to my school once, years ago, to train our staff on proper use of the new copier. When we were all crowded around to see, he looked at me and said, "When are you due?" I turned red and couldn't speak. A friend said, "She's not pregnant." He apologized and I was like, "Whatever. I know I'm fat. I just had a baby 6 months ago." He goes, "Oh then that's why." Dude, shut up, you already effed up. LOL. Another friend who was much older than me and nearly 400 pounds laughed and said, "I'm not pregnant either. This is all fat." It made the guy feel terrible. He goes, "Well it's just that I've seen so many pregnant people here." One of the teachers, who was pregnant, goes, "Really? How many? Because it's just me and the school psych." LOL. Oh my goodness.... SOME PEOPLE.....
I NEVER forgot how that felt.
Because of that very moment in my life I will NEVER EVER ask a woman if she is expecting. In fact our preschool teacher was looking kind of big last winter but I kept it to myself. In about April she said something that let me know she was for sure pregnant and I said, "Oh my goodness. I didn't even know!" She looked at me like I was nuts. But really it wasn't for sure. She could have just been gaining weight.
When I was in college and about 18 years old, I went to the mall with my sister. A boy, maybe about 15 or 16 years old, came up to me, tapped me on the shoulder and said, "You're a fat, ugly B****." I was like WHAT? He repeated it. My sister told him to shut up and that he was a jerk. He ran back to his group of guy friends and a few of them high-fived him. They were all laughing and cheering. I cried and cried.
People are cruel...
Not just kids. Some people just have no filters. Others are just so clueless.
I would have been like "Excuse me?" and when he repeated it, would have said something like "Oh" and punched him in his face. haha Some people....grrr!0 -
My daughter was upset the other day because someone made fun of me at the pool for my sun hat. It is totally a crazy old lady hat, but it shields my face from the sun so I don't even care a little bit. LOL She was crying and sad. I told her that there are two things she should know about middle schoolers/high schoolers who make fun of older people: (1) they won't always be that age and someday they will understand why older people did "stupid" things like wear sun hats when they were young and (2) never, ever make fun of a middle-aged woman. We have had significantly more practice being mean and catty. LOL I would never say anything mean to the kids, but it is so funny seeing them thinking how clever they are with their insults.
Ignore people when they say mean and stupid stuff - they are small and petty and trying to bring you down by making themselves feel better - what a terrible way to exist.
Oh, or you can always smile brightly and say "I'll be sure to tell your Mom that when I see her next." Sometimes they know you don't really know their parents, but other times they aren't sure and sweat it out. LOL0 -
their parents need to beat their behinds .. just sayin. all kids arent like that girl, just sounds like a lack of dicipline .. some people i tell ya.. turn it around and use it for motivation!0
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People stopped spanking their kids. Rude little ****s get away with murder.
I don't spank or hit my 3 daughters but they all are well behaved and would never say this to someone. My daughters are young but my oldest always steps up to kids and complains all the time about how mean other kids are. She doesn't even have the heart to tease her younger sisters.
Instead of just hitting my kids, my husband behave in a way that we are proud for our daughters to mimic. Is it the lectures your parents gave you what you remember the most or is it their actions?
We continue to educate our children on expected behavior and why. When one does do something we don't approve of, we explain why and how they should behave next time.
Or we could just spank them and send them to their room.
I am raising adults, not children and I want them to have the correct tools on how to behave and handle situations.0 -
So, today while I was getting my walk in in the park, these 2 young kids (about 12yrs) were messing around with their bike in the middle of the sidewalk...I didn't think anything of it until I passed them and the one said "fat *****!" Now, I wasn't sure If I heard him right so I ignored him and kept walking. So he yelled it louder. I turned around and said "excuse me, what did you say?" Of course, He couldn't call me a fat ***** to my face because all he could say was "I didn't say nothin' homie" So i kept asking him (using vulgar language) "go on, tell me what the **** you said!" "oh i didn't say nothin homie"...his friend was just kinda standing there not saying anything...If he was not 12 I would have slapped him! I know I shouldn't be using cuss words around children but If he can call me a fat ***** then obviously he can handle the f word and plus i was so pissed words were just coming out of my mouth. I just ended up telling him to **** off...
Seriously...I can't stand how kids are these days! That really hurts. And obviously I'm walking in the park for a reason...not sitting on my *kitten* eating cake. This is the reason why I don't want to have kids...they're so evil now a days...I never even got called fat in middle/high school (in ear shot at least) things have changed and it's really messed up. I wish his mamma woulda heard that! lol....have any of you ever been called fat to your face by a complete stranger?
No offense but I'm not sure your any better. So the kid called you a fat*** which certainly is not appropriate but you JUSTIFY the fact that its okay for you to swear back. Where were you setting the example for this child? Just saying.0 -
I have to say, yes, that kid was ignorant. But don't blame the kid, blame his upbringing. My son is 9 and KNOWS he better have respect for people and he does. However, he has friends that aren't allowed to come to our house and play due to their lack of respect for humanity. There is actually a family with 3 boys and not one of them are allowed to play with my son because they are evil monsters. But it isn't their fault. They have a mother who is rarely home and relies on the neighborhood to watch her kids and there isn't a father at all in their lives. Not having two parents is NOT a reason a kid is bad, but not having any reliable parents can be detrimental.
I am really sorry to hear this happened to you. You are doing the right thing for you and that is what matters. Continue on your successful journey. For the record, I would have said much the same thing. I also would have added something about his lack of intelligence.0 -
I'm really sorry that happened to you!
Not all kids are evil though...I happen to think mine are pretty great.
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When I was pregnant with my 2nd child, I was going through a lot medically. They had just diagnosed me with super ventricular tachycardia (basically my heart beat REALLY fast and took a short cut)... anyway, we wanted to go to the mall to shop for baby things and just, to get out of the house, I had been on bed rest because of the aforementioned heart junk and was REALLY big at 8 months preggo. In an effort to prevent me from over doing things, I had to ride one of those electric wheel chairs through the mall... we were having a good time until this young couple walked passed giggling and he says to his g/f, wife, blond skinny witch "OMG did you see that fat chick, she should just get up and walk!!" ... she replied "If I ever get that ugly and fat kill me!".... I immediately burst into tears. My husband asked what was wrong and I told him.... well, my husband who is very non confrontational walked up to them and said "Excuse me. You just made my 8 month pregnant wife with a heart condition cry. I think yoru sad pathetic excuse for human beings and I think you should really reflect on what empty shallow people you must be to pass judgement on someone you know nothing about. F you both. Have a horrible day." So it's not just kids. Think nothing of these people. They clearly have nothing better to do than to belittle others.
wtfusernameis- Your husband rocks!!! Love what he did. That man is a keeper. You are beautiful inside and out but that woman is ugly forever!0 -
A couple of years ago i was in a night club in my home town and a guy i went to school with and hadn't seen in a long time patted my stomach and asked when i was due. Needless to say i was not pregnant evident by the large cocktail i had in my hand at the time.
Saying that the next time i saw him about a year or so after preggobellygate, he went as white as a sheet and all quiet, when i asked him if he was okay he said that he thought i was a ghost because someone had told him that I had died in a car crash.
i suspect said young man is not all there in the brain department.0 -
People stopped spanking their kids. Rude little ****s get away with murder.
^ This.
I've only ever been called fat to my face once, when I was a teenager. I was taking a walk through our neighborhood with my sister, and some grown man drove by us and shouted, "Do you own a bakery? Because you have a ton of rolls!" I was mortified. I never cried, I never even acknowledged the *kitten*, but it still hurt and I remember it to this day, 10+ years later.
I hate people sometimes. >:(0 -
Awww thanks!!! He truly is a keeperWhen I was pregnant with my 2nd child, I was going through a lot medically. They had just diagnosed me with super ventricular tachycardia (basically my heart beat REALLY fast and took a short cut)... anyway, we wanted to go to the mall to shop for baby things and just, to get out of the house, I had been on bed rest because of the aforementioned heart junk and was REALLY big at 8 months preggo. In an effort to prevent me from over doing things, I had to ride one of those electric wheel chairs through the mall... we were having a good time until this young couple walked passed giggling and he says to his g/f, wife, blond skinny witch "OMG did you see that fat chick, she should just get up and walk!!" ... she replied "If I ever get that ugly and fat kill me!".... I immediately burst into tears. My husband asked what was wrong and I told him.... well, my husband who is very non confrontational walked up to them and said "Excuse me. You just made my 8 month pregnant wife with a heart condition cry. I think yoru sad pathetic excuse for human beings and I think you should really reflect on what empty shallow people you must be to pass judgement on someone you know nothing about. F you both. Have a horrible day." So it's not just kids. Think nothing of these people. They clearly have nothing better to do than to belittle others.
wtfusernameis- Your husband rocks!!! Love what he did. That man is a keeper. You are beautiful inside and out but that woman is ugly forever!
10 years now and counting, and *blush* Thanks. 0 -
LOL Thanks IWhen I was pregnant with my 2nd child, I was going through a lot medically. They had just diagnosed me with super ventricular tachycardia (basically my heart beat REALLY fast and took a short cut)... anyway, we wanted to go to the mall to shop for baby things and just, to get out of the house, I had been on bed rest because of the aforementioned heart junk and was REALLY big at 8 months preggo. In an effort to prevent me from over doing things, I had to ride one of those electric wheel chairs through the mall... we were having a good time until this young couple walked passed giggling and he says to his g/f, wife, blond skinny witch "OMG did you see that fat chick, she should just get up and walk!!" ... she replied "If I ever get that ugly and fat kill me!".... I immediately burst into tears. My husband asked what was wrong and I told him.... well, my husband who is very non confrontational walked up to them and said "Excuse me. You just made my 8 month pregnant wife with a heart condition cry. I think yoru sad pathetic excuse for human beings and I think you should really reflect on what empty shallow people you must be to pass judgement on someone you know nothing about. F you both. Have a horrible day." So it's not just kids. Think nothing of these people. They clearly have nothing better to do than to belittle others.
I think I
your hubby. That's something my SO would have done too. My hubby too 0 -
People stopped spanking their kids. Rude little ****s get away with murder.
^ This.
I've only ever been called fat to my face once, when I was a teenager. I was taking a walk through our neighborhood with my sister, and some grown man drove by us and shouted, "Do you own a bakery? Because you have a ton of rolls!" I was mortified. I never cried, I never even acknowledged the *kitten*, but it still hurt and I remember it to this day, 10+ years later.
I hate people sometimes. >:(
You should have asked if he was the proud owner of a jerk store, and if he could restock himself.
At the store full of jerks.0 -
Unfortunately, you can't fix stupid. Sigh.
I've had a similar experience. It ended with me chasing the woman with a shopping cart. Not my best moment, but it makes for a good giggle now!
Not all kids are like that. Remember that if you were to have your own (they are a blessing...I promise), YOU get to influence them.
So, when you have your next workout take that stinging pain and use it to fuel yourself to keep going. Remember that saying "karma is a bit**"???? Well, it's true and she has a wicked sense of humor. They will reap what they sow.0 -
my response would have been "Too bad your mom didnt abort you"
LMAO!!! Going to save that one for next time hahahaha0 -
There were a few times while I was in college when I went out with my friends to the bars that someone had made a comment about my weight. It was hurtful but then again you can't let what others say bother you, I realized. It will eat you alive - being happy with yourself and who you are is more important than what a stranger thinks.0
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Never to my face . But the reason kids are the way they are is how they are raised . If you had a child you would do a better job than what he's Parent are parent's have done , How rude lil creeper . I'm sorry you had to go threw that .So, today while I was getting my walk in in the park, these 2 young kids (about 12yrs) were messing around with their bike in the middle of the sidewalk...I didn't think anything of it until I passed them and the one said "fat *****!" Now, I wasn't sure If I heard him right so I ignored him and kept walking. So he yelled it louder. I turned around and said "excuse me, what did you say?" Of course, He couldn't call me a fat ***** to my face because all he could say was "I didn't say nothin' homie" So i kept asking him (using vulgar language) "go on, tell me what the **** you said!" "oh i didn't say nothin homie"...his friend was just kinda standing there not saying anything...If he was not 12 I would have slapped him! I know I shouldn't be using cuss words around children but If he can call me a fat ***** then obviously he can handle the f word and plus i was so pissed words were just coming out of my mouth. I just ended up telling him to **** off...
Seriously...I can't stand how kids are these days! That really hurts. And obviously I'm walking in the park for a reason...not sitting on my *kitten* eating cake. This is the reason why I don't want to have kids...they're so evil now a days...I never even got called fat in middle/high school (in ear shot at least) things have changed and it's really messed up. I wish his mamma woulda heard that! lol....have any of you ever been called fat to your face by a complete stranger?0 -
Just tell him that you can't fix stupid. I have been called fat so many times to my face that I have lost count. It's gotten to the point when someone calls me fat I just say," really? Is that the best insult you can come up with?! Your parents were brother and sister, weren't they?"
^^^ THIS!0 -
One day while shopping, I was getting frustrated at the sheer ugliness of the store's plus size clothing. Out loud, to myself, I said, "I don't understand. I'm 20. I get that I'm big but why make it worse with giant awful clothes that will only make me look fat, old and frumpy." So skinny little b**** who was probably about 16 was walking behind me and mumbled, "You're f***ing ugly anyways, who cares" oh lordy lordy did I wanna haul off and slap the little snot!!!!!!0
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Yep.
I also don't put up with it.
There was a group of boys (probably 18 and five of them) and they were making rude remarks and I marched up to them asked them what their ******* problem was and asked if they felt like big men making fun of a women and they seemed pretty scared to be honest.
Strangers are the worst.
I've also had things yelled at me from cars too, it's ridiculous and very hurtful.0 -
You know what i found funny, in school there was the 'popular' boys and girls and there were a specific 5 that was most popular, and they decided pick me out to call fat and ugly etc..
well over the past couple of years i've seen them out and the boys have now settled down with girls that have had children etc and their girlfriends are not much smaller than I am and they dont exactly look the happy couple....
and couple of the popular girls i seen out have gained weight too and still have the same bitter ugly face and personality.
Point is beauty is within and sometimes karma comes bites those nasty people on the bum! i've seen most of us trying lose weight have amazing partners that love us for being us.... what have those people got... mainly nothing.
However I don't believe spanking children is going learn them much more respect than they already have sometimes their parents are that mean too, and sometimes not could be very well respected, i've seen many children be ery polite with parents then seem think its funny to b little people in front of their friends.
I was once shopping with friends and a guy came up to me and said you'd be really hot if you lost some weight, I dont mean that nasty but you would...... i just replied and said I don't want to look hot to guys like you, so i'll stick to how i am but thanks for your advice.
im firm believer in 'smile it confuses people' I dont get mad n front of these people they dont deserve feelings.0 -
Girl, u were right to call him on it, he is lucky it wasn't me i would have slapped him. Kids today have no respect for anyone including themselves, if they call u that what do they call their parents? Next time that ever happens y can kindly walk up to whoever said it and tell him yes i may be fat but i can go on a diet, but y are so ugly what can u do about that? might shut them up for a minute. Hang in there i saw ur pic ur look ok to me. Hang in there in a few yrs. they will be short, bald, and fat. serves them right.
always
susie0 -
I would have sat on the little ****er.0
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