The Struggle

kjoac002

I am struggling. I started my weight loss journey in June. I did drop 20 lbs by just watching what I eat and it actually wasn't even that hard. But then at the beginning of August I ended up moving back in with my sister and her kids to save money and GEEZE LOUISE has it been rough. There's bad food everywhere. On top of that my boyfriend and I go out to eat at least twice a week. Then add the fact that I started a new job where people will celebrate damn near anything. Just today I walked in and was presented with cookies AND brownies. The only upside to this whole weight loss debocle is that i've actually only gained 2 pounds even though this has been going on for almost 3 months. However comma im still depressed because I am not meeting the goals I have set for myself. What happened to my will power?? How do I get my motivation back and learn to say no??

meridianova

kjoac002 wrote: »

How do I get my motivation back and learn to say no??

one day at a time.

i've been dealing with weight loss struggles for most of my life. when i finally got in a place that i could take complete control over everything, i realized that trying to set long-term goals wasn't going to work. i had to focus on what was right in front of me, in small, easily handled increments.

so each day i set a goal for myself... "today i will eat on plan and do whatever workout i've scheduled at the gym." that's it. if i don't meet those goals, i don't dwell on what happened the day before, but i focus a little bit harder on making sure i make my goal. all that matters is today. deal with tomorrow when it comes.

each day i make my goal, it becomes a little bit easier to reach tomorrow's goal. after a while, you look back and realize that what was a focused goal is now a habit that you've been doing daily for the last month, or six.

and as far as work shoving food in your face, a smile and a quick "no thank you" is all you need. compliment the looks, the smell, wish them a happy birthday/anniversary/promotion/birth/graduation/st. swithin's day, but don't let someone else dictate what you're going to eat. it's not their body, it's yours, and they need to respect that.

MelodyandBarbells

I love treats in the office. I can take a small portion, enjoy it with my morning coffee and "plan" to come back at 3 for more. Of course by then the containers have been licked clean if it was good. If it wasn't, nope I won't be coming back for more

Which leads to another strategy - try to indulge only when it's really good. Just any ol thing you could get from Walmart? Well you could get that anytime yourself if you really want!

Lastly, for home you could try either some hobbies or walks that keep you outside and may actually help you exercise more. I'm sure there will be lots of tips posted for getting just your portion that satisfies you and not much more - I'll be reading to learn some ideas, too! Good luck!

Need2Exerc1se

kjoac002 wrote: »

How do I get my motivation back and learn to say no??

I think you just have to really want it. It is harder when temptation is everywhere, but you have to want to lose more than you want to eat that brownie or cookie. 2 lbs in 3 months while faced with temptation is good, but it will also mean 8 lbs gained in a year if you don't nip it in the bud now. Best of luck to you.

Kalikel

Motivation comes from within. Nobody else can motivate you.

lbride

I am sort of in the same place; once I've stopped counting cals for awhile it takes me a few weeks or so to get back in the swing of things and get back my motivation. Last week I limited my cals to approx 1500-1600 per day (first week back) and over the weekend, lost all motivation and now I'm back at it again - going to try to keep it at 1500 per day this week, and at least have one "good" day this weekend. So it's not all or nothing!

tulips_and_tea

I think a common mistake is expecting and/or waiting for that feeling of motivation before making changes. Motivation may have been what started you on your journey, but expecting it to always be there and to rely on it is not realistic.

I don't wait to feel motivated before I go to work, or clean the house, or do the laundry, etc. I do those things automatically because I need to. Same with eating healthy and exercising. Just do it! Don't WAIT to feel motivated first.

JessaLee0324

meridianova wrote: »

kjoac002 wrote: »

How do I get my motivation back and learn to say no??

one day at a time.

i've been dealing with weight loss struggles for most of my life. when i finally got in a place that i could take complete control over everything, i realized that trying to set long-term goals wasn't going to work. i had to focus on what was right in front of me, in small, easily handled increments.

so each day i set a goal for myself... "today i will eat on plan and do whatever workout i've scheduled at the gym." that's it. if i don't meet those goals, i don't dwell on what happened the day before, but i focus a little bit harder on making sure i make my goal. all that matters is today. deal with tomorrow when it comes.

each day i make my goal, it becomes a little bit easier to reach tomorrow's goal. after a while, you look back and realize that what was a focused goal is now a habit that you've been doing daily for the last month, or six.

and as far as work shoving food in your face, a smile and a quick "no thank you" is all you need. compliment the looks, the smell, wish them a happy birthday/anniversary/promotion/birth/graduation/st. swithin's day, but don't let someone else dictate what you're going to eat. it's not their body, it's yours, and they need to respect that.

Well put! Getting through each day, one at a time, will eventually payoff. And no,you don't have to be apart of each and everything darn celebration at work! Just say "no". It's not rude. It's your choice! I say it all the time.

Archerychickge

I think I would have to create a healthy stash of treats that I could enjoy in place of the naughty ones... Like instead of having cookies and brownies at work, maybe have a granola bar with your co-workers. When they see your resolve to stick to your plan, they may stop or at least lighten up on their constant temptation. Heck some of them may even join you in the process and start watching what they eat too, then you'd have a buddy to help you as well.

At home, do the same thing. Keep a stash of good foods around that you can enjoy instead of the bad stuff. But don't deny yourself good things altogether. A cookie or a brownie every now and then won't kill your progress. Just be mindful of every bite you eat and log it. You can make almost anything fit into your daily goals if you stick with it.

Heck, on days when I know I'm gonna be tempted with something really yummy, I'll save up calories through the day so I can enjoy a normal portion of the yummy stuff.

It all about finding a balance that works for you. Good luck!

JustMeShelly

I completely understand. I struggle with no "willpower" against junk. Buttttt I have learned that it's only uncomfortable for a few minutes when I say no thanks to the cupcake someone offers me. I often relate it to when I quit smoking. YOU CAN DO IT!

Fuzzipeg

Please try to think how you will be in six months IF you are still doing as you are -you will be not as you want.............. If you manage to get your head round the issue for today, then manage to hold it for another, again and again for the majority of six months .... you will be closer. If you are confronted by various temptations first thing you could say, "thank you, I had a very good breakfast and can't face anything more".

kjoac002

Thanks for the words of encouragement everyone! I just have to keep my eyes on the prize. I did say no to both the cookies and the brownies AND the invite to the mexican restaraunt for lunch. And hiding out in my cubicle seemed to help too lol

Tigelo

Trying to eat healthy in an office environment is hard, especially with the holidays. I know it is and will be a struggle for me. It's hard to pass by the donuts and homemade cookies. But I've been able to do it recently. I just say no and I feel good that I had the power to do it. Every time I say no, I feel little more powerful. Eat good whole food and the cravings for the bad stuff will not be so bad.

MamaRiss

BZAH10 wrote: »

I think a common mistake is expecting and/or waiting for that feeling of motivation before making changes. Motivation may have been what started you on your journey, but expecting it to always be there and to rely on it is not realistic.

I don't wait to feel motivated before I go to work, or clean the house, or do the laundry, etc. I do those things automatically because I need to. Same with eating healthy and exercising. Just do it! Don't WAIT to feel motivated first.

This. I was pissed off this morning, didn't want to work out, do chores, or eat "healthy". But I did it. Still miserable, but I'm not losing the day do to lack of motivation. I have my days that I do just say screw it, I'm not doing it today. But I try my best to limit it to one day, and then get right back on track. As far as treats and junk, if I want it, I make it fit. As long as I keep active, I can afford to indulge in a treat and not go completely off the rails

Baconist

For home, I'd attempt separate food buying and meal preparing. This can be tough, I know. I share a kitchen with someone who is one of the decentest people I've ever known. Except getting very upset that I "dirty up the kitchen every time cook!" Whilst they eat more pizza in a week than I've eaten in my life time and makes loads and loads of pasta dishes (not good for the diabetes here).

I ignore it or joke it off and continue to cook *and* clean up after myself, I even offer to share something I've made if (and I usually do) have enough to share.

I was ordered to lose 50 pounds, I've no choice in the matter -- well okay, I could ignore the order and die before 51, I suppose -- this also helps keep the, er, comments to a minimum. "it's for health reasons" works every time.

999tigger

Before I saw the end of your post I was just going to say learn to day no.

Commit and do. You either want it and are prepared to pay the price or you dont. If you want it that badly, then it becomes easy to say no. If you have got the message that to get to the traget you simply have to consume less than you burn then it becomes a no brainer.

1. Log everything.
2. Bad food round the house, just ignore it but if you cant then maybe ask your sister to put it out of sight? Focus on what you will eat that day by filling your diary out and you should have your go to snacks as well plus any treats that you have worked into your plan.
3. Earn extra calories by exercise. I use these as my reserve and even someone as fit as I can do enough to start burning more calories, even if its walking that little bit extra.
4. Consider whether you need to go out 2x a week for food, maybe you could find another acctivity> If not is there any reason you cnat either pick something healthy or fit it into your diet.
5. Workplace treats just say no or have half a cookie instead of a full one. Or one cookie instead of ten.

You will start meeting your goals when you start implementing your deficit again.
Depressed? Dont waste time on it you have places you wnat to be and goals you wnat to meet. You are doing great, look at the weight you have lost and make a new target as to how much you wnat to lose by Christmas or New Year. Keep logging and keep your deficit up.

haildodger

Instead of looking for motivation or some back bone, why don't you just be honest with yourself, and admit that you are not important enough to you. It's always easy to make excuses. These forums are full of them. It's a little tougher to say that right now, you're not important enough to you. When you should work out, but don't feel like it. When you over eat. Whenever you know you're making a poor choice. Every single time you choose something else over your health and well being, you're not important. So what does it matter if you drag yourself down...

yoovie

the good news is that all of these things are within your control!

kimny72

Can't help you with the problem at home, but I say no to work treats all the time. If everyone is gathered for something, I stand around with my mug of coffee and chit chat. I guess people assume I already had some, why else would I be there? And if someone tries to push something on me, I say no thanks I had a big breakfast/lunch and I'm still stuffed. For some reason people are fine with me saying I'm already stuffed, as opposed to I simply don't want something or worse, I'm watching what I'm eating...

kjoac002

HaiLDodger wrote: »

Instead of looking for motivation or some back bone, why don't you just be honest with yourself, and admit that you are not important enough to you. It's always easy to make excuses. These forums are full of them. It's a little tougher to say that right now, you're not important enough to you. When you should work out, but don't feel like it. When you over eat. Whenever you know you're making a poor choice. Every single time you choose something else over your health and well being, you're not important. So what does it matter if you drag yourself down...

If I wasnt important to me I wouldnt have lost 20 lbs to begin with nor would I be on here asking for advice. I know I havent been dilligent and I know I have to have more willpower and that is something I am working on. Thanks for the input though..

lorib642

I got derailed and am trying to get back on track. I know if I wait around for the mood to strike, motivation to come along, it will be a long wait. I am doing what I can. Taking baby steps. My main goal right now is to maintain and not backslide. You can do this. If it all seems overwhelming just look at one task at a time. Unless you are in a hurry it won't matter if you took a little longer to lose the weight.