Self-sabotage - why am I still doing it?!

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  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,150 Member
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    I agree with the poster saying maybe you're restricting yourself too much during the week.
  • Shalaurise
    Shalaurise Posts: 707 Member
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    Pumpkin scone season is assisting me in my lack of weight loss. :stuck_out_tongue:
    Once the season of pumpkin everything is gone, I will likely be back to normal as the treat that I am binging on will no longer be available... Then again, if it was available all year I wouldn't be like "eat is now or never!" so there is that...
  • JoyeII
    JoyeII Posts: 240 Member
    edited October 2014
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    Are the weekends your "rest" days from the gym?
  • klkarlen
    klkarlen Posts: 4,366 Member
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    Acria wrote: »
    I saw a psychiatrist after I had my baby as there was concern I was at risk of postpartum depression. I was okay on that front after a few weeks, but he did also help me address some of my anxiety issues. Self-sabotage is a real thing, and it's not just a lack of willpower, or carbs, etc etc. It's acting in a way to prevent yourself from bettering your situation, despite rationally wanting the betterment, out of an anxiety stemming from, among other things, poor self-worth. Your inner view of yourself (poor) no longer matches the reality (you're getting healthier, improving yourself). This causes an anxiety and so to 'remedy' this, you basically bring yourself back down. My psychiatrist explained it roughly that way to me, and it made sense for me in my situation, knowing myself. He said it's also why so many celebrities crash and burn when they really make it. I'm absolutely not a professional, and don't know your situation, but that fitted me and I find it helps me to understand why I do what I do. I hope you can work your way out of the anxiety cycle :)

    I agree with the part in bold above. I've seen so many people in my life do this. In more ways than just over eating.
  • terri_mom
    terri_mom Posts: 748 Member
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    My problem is exposure to bad foods on weekends (DS in sports, so hard to take a salad to the basketball court or bowling alley or baseball field). And a DH that doesn't care how much he or I weigh, so he makes "bad" food. I need the willpower to eat healthy in front of others who are not eating healthy, and to make healthy food while DH makes unhealthy food. It makes me feel like a short-order cook, but it will eventually be worth it ! ! ! Also, it's hard to exercise while sitting on the bleachers, and I haven't figured out how to fix that situation yet. I hope you find a buddy, and the strength you need to stand-up to the munchies. :D
  • brenn24179
    brenn24179 Posts: 2,144 Member
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    I think believing you can learn to live a different way. That you deserve the good life. Like someone said self worth. You can set boundaries with yourself and say No. I didn't believe it possible but have been able to do this, I am finally taking care of myself.
  • astrose00
    astrose00 Posts: 754 Member
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    I have a similar problem. I know what it's like to achieve a goal and blow a goal by gaining it all back (and more). I have tons of regret and am so mad at myself that I have to do this AGAIN. I am hoping that I remember the struggle whenever I'm tempted again. Right now, it's so easy for me to just say no to cravings. I am OCD like that. I need to bottle that for when I reach my goal. I do not want to go through that again. Nothing that I ate on my way to 80lb gain in 2 years was worth it. And most of the things weren't even that good. If your problem is like mine, "we" just need to find other things to fill the voids of boredom and emotional eating. Instead of binging, do something fun. I love photography and doing photoshop. I also love working out and riding my bike. The feeling after doing those things is amazing. The feeling after eating fried "this" and sugary "that" is... yuck and blah. Never ever worth it. And on top of it I have this fat gut and wide butt with thunder thighs. Yay. Good luck.
  • pplastics
    pplastics Posts: 135 Member
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    blobby10 wrote: »

    So WHY oh WHY do I keep sabotaging further progress by eating badly? As I'm eating I'm thinking "I don't even want this, why am I eating it?

    It is in that moment that you have to stop yourself. Spit out what is in your mouth and put the rest away. Change the behavior...change the pattern of overeating.

    Try taking a moment each time you go to eat and ask yourself one simple question: Am I hungry? If the answer is no, find something else to do. If the answer is yes, eat something within your calorie goals. It really is as simple as that.


  • fatty_jojo
    fatty_jojo Posts: 2
    edited October 2014
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    KEColorado wrote: »
    Your post speaks to me - my reality! I lost 6 lbs, then completely self-sabotaged and now gained even more back. But yesterday I logged back in and started again. I think I can do this. I can do this.[/q
  • fatty_jojo
    fatty_jojo Posts: 2
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    I'm the same. I was working out and clean eating for maybe 6 weeks in hopes of losing some weight before a holiday with my partner to Hawaii. I'm by no means a big person but i am definitely not happy with my size. I was happy at 55kg... this was a few years ago. I now weigh almost 67kg and am pretty short. In the 6 weeks i had gotten down to 61kg (lost 5 kg), went away for 2 weeks, have come back and am now at almost 67 again. How can i have put on 5kg in 2 weeks? I don't know what is wrong with me. Then i work really hard again and can't seem to shift my lower belly.

    Then because i feel so bad about myself for putting the weight back on, i start not caring about what i eat again. I feel like my partner has lost attraction to me and i feel ugly.

    I just want to get back on track and get back down to 55kg, lose the weight, the flab and get my confidence back. Any tips?

    I want to be able to do this too
  • TrainerLB
    TrainerLB Posts: 42 Member
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    This is actually a form of disordered eating called "binge" eating. It's a pattern of restricting certain foods or limiting calories and then gorging or binging. A binge can make you physically sick and emotionally distraught. I'd recommend talking to your doctor about ways to cope with this as it can become a very real eating disorder. Possibly evaluate the strict diet you're adhering to. There is room weekly for small, moderated goodies like sweets or chocolate, but in a controlled and meaningful way.
  • Lien4health
    Lien4health Posts: 11 Member
    edited October 2014
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    This is all very helpful. Honestly, comforting in some ways. I have been doing this for a long time. This last time committed to others, thinking it would help. I can identify with being bored, being anxious, etc. This past time that I lost a few more pounds and felt great about my hard work, I cut myself some slack and started "treating" myself to the celebratory, comfort foods I have a love relationship to. I tried to eat just a little bit in moderation and slowly but surely, the triggers went off and I was on a point of no return. LOL! Seriously, there isn't a point of no return because I do return to the same cycle. Accepting that I had one or 2 bad days is ok; life isn't perfect. Well, 3 weeks later and 3 pounds heavier, I will change back to leading by example again. I hope that my log ins and exercise carry me longer than the 3 week stint last time. Little by little, I can change. You can too!
  • fit4lifemom
    fit4lifemom Posts: 47 Member
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    I have the same basic issue, exercise is easy to get in, I love doing it. But the food....Sometimes it is like I am 2 people, an adult that knows what I absent and what it would take to get there, and a spoiled child who feels like she is bring punished and having treats withheld. It is the closest way to describe what is happening. Last week, I started living day to day with the diet. I gave not given up treats, but every morning I make a choice if I am going to eat them that day or not. It seems to keep the spoiled child in me happy knowing that I have a choice, if I want yo make it. Good luck.
  • blobby10
    blobby10 Posts: 357 Member
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    It is so comforting to know how many other are in the same boat. I am now on day 3 of my 'no rubbish' mindset and apart from mindlessly scoffing 2 days worth of mixed nuts (decided on a 'healthy' snack at work) I'm doing OK. I resisted temptation in the supermarket last night by asking myself "Are you sure you want to make the decision to buy this chocolate and eat it, knowing how rotten you will feel afterwards". Somehow the answer was no and I didn't buy the chocolate. o:)

    Whilst my life appears idyllic to many people, I am under a lot of pressure at the moment and I'm sure this is why my binging/sweet food overeating is happening. I would love to be one of those people who stop eating during stressful times but I'm not and will have to learn to deal with it if I want to start showing off the results of my hard work in the gym.

    At least I'm lucky in that I don't even like fast food so never get cravings for McD's or BK or KFC. B)

    fit4lifemom: I can understand what you mean - think we might be kindred spirits!

    Good luck to everyone battling on! We will win one day! xx
  • mamamodge
    mamamodge Posts: 5
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    Some people put these binges down to refined carbs, and advise low carbs high fat diets to curb the craving .It has worked with me .

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