I am afraid to even post this...

SaLandrum

Good Morning Tom .....
Welcome to the Wonderful World of MyFitnessPal. Everyone here has the same goal in mind - to become a healthier "me" and we are all dancing to a different beat - but we are together making great music. As many have said before me - look to the message boards as there is alot of information and support there.

One of the things that helped motivate me (before I started seeing my personal trainer) was the daily fitness challenges I would see on the message boards. (Leeann1979 posts them daily ) http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1001402-tuesday-s-mini-challenge?hl=mini+challenge#posts-15328186

Sabrina

liesevanlingen

You can do this, Tom!

I also have a couple of suggestions. If walking is really hard for you, you could start with water aerobics. Get into a pool and jump up and down or walk back and forth across the pool at waist depth. Most pools have a "free swim" period at some point during the weekly schedule, or you might be able to use a community one. Water gives you great resistance with minimal impact.

Plan your meals ahead of time and do your shopping when you are not hungry. With MFP, you can track your calories so you can, for example, plan a treat (such as a fast food burger) and make it fit into your calories for the day.

Set small goals. Tell yourself that you only need to lose, say 20 pounds in 2 months Reward yourself with non-food rewards such as a good book, a computer game, new clothes (which you will need anyway once you've lost several sizes) etc. You will probably lose a lot more at the beginning of your journey. I started at 192 and was losing more than 5 lbs a month at first. I've currently lost about 45 lbs and the last five have taken me a few months. Celebrate the NSVs (non-scale victories) such as losing a size, being complimented on your weight loss, even not eating the muffins/doughnuts someone brought to work.

If you are a comfort eater like so many of us, you need to retrain your brain. When you feel the urge to eat/binge ant it's not at a regular meal time, find something else to do. Call a friend (or come here and post) for support. Go for a short walk. Drink two or three glasses of water. Snack on baby carrots, sliced peppers, celery sticks, berries, apples or whatever your preferred fruit or vegetable might be. Distract yourself. Calculate the calories of what you crave and figure out how you can burn them off--and do it first. These strategies have worked for a lot of folks here.

Best of luck to you! And don't forget, we're here for support, post if you need encouragement!

Seej

You're gonna KILL it! You're going to wake up every morning to a stronger and more awesome YOU! Take it slow, be kind to yourself, and you will destroy all obstacles in your path!

That was my pep talk. I'm proud of you. Now here's some tips based on my experience. If you don't care to read them, skim over for more pep talk:

1. Keep your doctor involved.

2. Every little success does not deserve a party. Celebrate with moderation, and if at all possible, without food. Think about the hobbies, activities, and people you love. Make them a part of your celebration.

3. Remember yourself. People are going to start talking a LOT about how you look different. Always remember the value you have for *other* reasons... whatever you love about yourself. If you start focusing too much on the visible results, it can get weird in your head, and a little depressing. (That doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy the compliments; just remember that the changes in your body aren't a complete definition of what makes you so special.)

4. If you're interested in healthy recipes, MESSAGE ME! I've made a hobby of finding fun new things to cook.

MORE PEP TALK: Now get out there, mister, and KILL IT! You are strong, capable, and most of all, you deserve to feel your best! Do it for you; do it for the people you wanna hang around for; do it for anyone around you who might need that strong role model right now. You. Can. Do. This. And remember, tomorrow isn't a new day. The next meal, the next flight of stairs... THAT is your next chance to choose right! You rock, buddy.

AngieWion

Good for you for posting this, It takes a strong person to make that change and you are headed in the right direction. I have sent a friend request! You need all the positive support you can get.I started this journey at 408 and I am down 61 lbs in 260 days. It is possible by September I want to be down 100lbs. You can do it, start by making small changes. Walk down your street and come back, all more green (spinach, Kale, broccoli, ect...) Make small changes will make a big change in the long run!!! you will see the change before you know it! If your looking to eat out Salads, Subway (high in Sodium)it is a start or even order your food and immediately ask for a box and put half in there for the next day so you are not eating it all in one sitting. Keep apples, grapes, fruit, veggies around so it your board you can eat the good stuff for you then the bad stuff. If it helps go through your cupboards and throw some of that stuff away. I love ice cream but I know if I buy a normal size container I will want to eat it all the time so I buy the indiviual ones and when I want ice cream I have the smaller container and I am not tempted to eat the whole thing (normal container) I can now buy the large container and not want to eat it, it has been in my freezer for over 2 months now and not even half way gone. Slowly but Surely you will get there, I am looking forward to watching your journey unfold and hear about yoru success come christmas!!!!

Good luck,
Angie

NurseEmmyRN

You got this! Start making 1 easy change at a time rather than piling on the "perfect" lifestyle all at once. My first step that lost my first 15 pounds with little to almost no effort was telling myself "No eating after 8." I am now working on increasing fruit and vegetable intake, which isn't actually showing any immediate results (my body can tell when it hasn't REALLY gotten the calories it wanted), but I know I'm improving my overall nutrition. I'm not aiming for perfect, even, on just the fruit and veggies. If I get in one or two extra servings, I feel accomplished for the day. My next goal is going to be to eat slower. Then "Eat until 80% full."

We're in a similar boat with having gained our weight with emotional stimuli. For me, I crave SUGAR like crazy when I'm extra down. I used to eat entire rolls of raw cookie dough in one sitting! It was delicious, but no good when I grab the extra weight at my waste. A good trick for avoiding binging on sugary food is to eat pickles when you crave the sugar. It makes it almost entirely disappear. Sometimes, if I MUST eat the sugar, I get frozen juice concentrate and will eat the frozen juice concentrate right out of the can. I WILL NOT sit down with it, though. If I am going to give in, I have to get up, go to the freezer, eat a couple spoonfuls and then put it away for at least a half hour before I can go back. I also ONLY get ice cream at home that's in the individual cup servings.

I also had to initially log my emotions before eating. I'm Christian, so at the end of the day I liked to reflect on these thoughts and emotions in prayer and look up Bible verses that were relevant. I'd also talk about them to whichever friend I trusted that was closest (and whose counsel I trusted, most importantly - a friend might not judge your emotion but still offer TERRIBLE advise).

So far, it is definitely a process of making oneself more aware - when you're eating, how you're eating, what you're feeling, and what your body is actually telling you.

MarjorieStevens

I sent you a friend request. Together we can accomplish anything!

writer_chick

Hi Tom!

You're truly an inspiration to me for coming here, owning it, and wanting to make a difference. I think that's a huge accomplishment in and of itself. So firstly, congrats on taking the first step. I think you've gotten a lot of great advice here, and I won't reiterate all of it. Besides, I'm new to all of this myself. Baby steps--and you totally, 100% CAN do this. Anytime you need a listening ear, please feel free to message me.

Hugs,
Sandy

alawilliams

Welcome to the world of learning how to say "I got this"!!! You have made the first step in your success. Loosing weight/being healthy is similar to alcoholism..... 12 step program. The first is admitting where you have failed. Now that you have done that, you have accomplished the first step. This community is an awesome way to stay motivated. You got this Tom.... We are all behind you. Focus the first week on just changing your eating habits... stay off the scale because that is just a number that makes you miserable. This is a new lifestyle, not a diet. Best thing....... WATER WATER WATER. Soda was the hardest thing for me to let go of and now I don't even think about it. Fresh fruits and vegetables and good protein. Good luck on your new lifestyle. We are here anytime you feel that you are slipping...

shellyb17

You got this Tom, you are ready!!!

micheleld73

Hi Tom,

Thank you for sharing this. I appreciate your honesty.
I have tried and failed time and time again myself, but have seen more success this time than ever before and I don't mean in the way which I can see on the scale. Instead of having my focus be that I wish to weigh *Blank* which for me always seemed like a huge unattainable goal and therefore I would always end up failing. This time I have set small goals such as:
I want to be able to climb the stairs at work (6 floors) without having to stop. (got to the fourth today!)
I want to be able to do 20 squats (am up to 40)
I want to be able to run ( am at a pretty good jog pace)
The weight loss has just been a happy side effect.
Maybe by changing the context of what you wish to attain will make it a less intimidating and therefore a more achievable/ maintainable goal?

I would love to follow your progress and share in your small successes, add me is you like

Good Luck!
Crystal

^^THIS^^ Don't make your victories about the scale.
You'll see a lot of NSV (non-scale victory) posts here.
Each time you achieve one, post it and get that continued support and encouragement to set and meet your next one!

Good luck to you!!

toutmonpossible

Hi everyone;

As the title says, I'm truly afraid to even be posting this. I am 459lbs, as per 2 weeks ago, and I want, no, I need help. I have never been in shape. I have never felt comfortable with my body and the closest I had ever been to success with a diet was my sophmore year of high school in which I lost 80lbs dropping from 360lbs to 280lbs in a little under 6 months. Then my uncle died who I was very close with and I ballooned back up to what I am now and it doesn't seem to ever stop. I am losing all hope for life and even went as far as attempting to end it last year, (for which I seeked professional help for and am now stable and never needed medication).

This is my final recourse, I am willing to try changing my life style 1 final time, I've tried everything from atkins to juicing and from Insanity to Yoga nothing lasts for more than a month with me. I have no drive since I have never been fit so I don't know the gratification and vindication that lies at the finish line of a life style change. I have no moral support, and no emotional support. Finally my food budget, it's roughly $250 per month, I have a costco membership and live in North New Jersey. I'm not here looking for attention, and I'm not here to sit and talk about cats, I'm here to change and I need help. So please, HELP ME!

If you choose to help, and need more specific information feel free to ask anything I'm an open book.

Warm Regards,
Tom



P.S. I'm looking to acheive a goal of being 299lbs by Christmas 2013 as the biggest Christmas gift ever to my family.

At this point in the thread, I probably don't have anything new to add, except to wish you good luck. One other thing: You speak as if it's an achievement that you didn't take medication when you were seeing a therapist. There's nothing wrong in taking medication if you need it.

tedrickp

Hey Tom,

Saw your post and found it inspiring. You might wonder why but it is because you made an intro post here and that is something I have YET to do. :laugh:

I think your story stuck out to me because it is similar to mine.

In fact, I was actually heavier than you when I started out. Almost 50 pounds heavier.

When you are at our size, it can be tough to even come to a place like this. You probably checked out the forums, saw a ton of comments about people struggling to lose the last 20 pounds, or maybe they wanna lose 50 pounds...or maybe they were high school athletes who let themselves go.

While all of those people are in the same boat as us, it still feels different when you are a super-sized person who has been overweight all your life.

I am no where close to the end of my journey, but I finally feel like I am off to a real sustainable start. Here are some of the tips that have helped me:

1. Get a Scale that fits you: I never had a scale that could fit me. Even a couple years ago when I dedicated myself to the gym I couldn't tell if I was making progress. People said I looked smaller - I didn't see it and I didn't have a scale that could prove it. Lots of people here hate the scale, but it is so motivating to actually see pounds drop. I got a 550lb max scale on Amazon for like 80 bucks. Well worth it. Another tip - I had a HARD time finding 500lb max scales...until I searched for 550lb max...weird.

2. Food Scale: Another scale - luckily much cheaper. I got mine off of ebay for like 15 bucks. Until you actually weigh food, counting calories is a total guessing game. You will see people have added things like "Medium Potato" to the database her e- bit what does that really tell you? If you know the weight of your food MUCH easier to track calories. It will also open your eyes to portion control.

3. Avoid Strict Diets: I started out trying to be all "clean eater" Ted. That didn't last long... It just made me feel bad every time I had something not deemed "clean". After doing some research I found out that "clean eating" is a pretty vague term that means different things to different people. It is more of a catch phrase than anything IMO. I eat much more healthily these days - include much more fruits and vegetables and unprocessed foods, but I don't deprive myself of anything.

4. Calories In/Calories Out - I whole heartedly believe in this. I feel like I am living proof of this concept - although I was so big I want to see how my body reacts when I get lower. But yeah I haven't limited carbs or anything like that. I think people overrate the link between insulin and fat. I think people overate the Glycemic Index as well. Don't over think things - eat less calories than you burn.

5. In Place of a Roadmap - Someone linked to this post earlier - it includes a great way to figure out an approximation of how many calories you use a day. I just want to point out that it is one of those things that work a little differently for us really big guys. The writer of that post will suggest a calorie deficit to aim for, but we can certainly pull off more of a deficit than other people due to our original size.

6. Exercise - Start weight lifting now. We are in the very rare position that we are so big we can actually build some muscle on a calorie deficit. Also if you are new to weight lifting you have "newbie" gains so the combination of both can be quite motivating. Don't worry about the perfect way to weight train - just start doing it however you can. I started with 20lb dumbbells. Then I got 40lb dumbbells. Then I bought an adjustable bench...then I got a sweet set of pro style dumbbells from Craiglist that included 70lb weights. Now I am 20lbs away from a major goal and that is when I will buy a power rack and start "Starting Strength".

I also walk - but be careful. I started out walking 2k - and almost dying LOL I remember almsot calling my brother to pick me up. In a matter of months I was doing 5k minimum each walk - sometimes twice a day. At the start of May I walked 40 miles from May 1st-May4th...thats when I hurt my foot and am still unable to walk long distances. My fault for overdoing it. Sidenote - some good walking/running shoes are key for us to keep our feet safe(r).

At the end of the day I gotta believe you can do it Tom. I gotta believe you can do it, because it helps me believe I can do it. Stay strong and commit to using MFP and you will certainly notice a difference.

digressions

Add me to the list of people who want to help support you in your goal to be a better you! I don't think there is anything else I can add that hasn't already been said, lots of great advice already posted, but I've sent you a friend request and will gladly support and help you in any way I can. The first month will be the hardest - stick with it! You CAN do it!

(Edit: To the guy above me - that is the best ticker I've seen to date! LOL Also, you're amazing!)

RllyGudTweetr

Anything the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.

You can do this, Tom.

Add me if you'd like more support. I'm not the best rah-rah guy, but my diary's open and I've been here over 170 days in a row.

stealthSLOTH

Even though I am admittedly the type to also like to sit and talk about cats, I wish you all the best.
I just wanted to say that while it would be a gift to your family, improving your health would be the biggest gift to YOURSELF!
Not to sound like a cliche, but it is worth remembering that you are worth it!

Cheers! :flowerforyou:

twentyco

Welcome!

You can do this.

What works is somewhat different for everyone. Here is what has worked (so far) for me:

I made one change at a time. At first, I started by just logging everything I ate, so I could see what my calorie intake was like (yikes!). Next, I worked at staying within the calorie intake that MFP gave me, one day at a time. Once I was fairly comfortable with that (not perfect --- just generally comfortable that I could do it most of the time), then I added water --- before, I almost never drank water. I started adding more and more each day, and now it's most of what I drink. In the past few months, I've added exercise, about three times a week -- started with walking, and now I do a combination of walking and exercise bike. The weight has come off, not always as quickly as I would like, but it has.

I would encourage you to (a) do this for you, not for other people; and (b) measure your progress against yourself (am I doing better than I was yesterday, last week, last month) rather than against other people. This is about you getting healthier for you. You are worth it, and you can do this.

Please feel free to add me if it is helpful. And best of luck to you on your journey.

Goin4goal

Hi Tom - "You don't have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great" Zig Zagler.

And you have taken that first step. I have that quote taped by my computer and refer to it often. Because I have made that decision to start my life over. I began my weight loss journey in January of this year, but was just playing around until March when I found MFP. I absolutely love love love this site!!!!! My husband and I eat very healthy most of the time. The biggest change we've made is to cook at home. Food prepared in restaurants is loaded with sodium. If I have more sodium than MFP recommends, I will not see the scale move - period. I AM NOT ON A DIET!!!! This is a hard concept at first because we have been lead to believe that we must spend a ton of money on the latest fad diet book (I have tons), latest ridiculous equipment (I have a few), pills, even stuff you sprinkle on top of your food, in order to lose weight. You do not need any of this - just log what you eat into MFP - watch that you stay within your goals and that's it. So simple its ridiculous!!!!! I feel like the biggest weight (no pun intended) has been lifted off my shoulders because I don't have to think about what I'm doing. I just put healthy food into my body and exercise some. I began walking for 15 minutes and I'm now up to an hour most days, sometimes an hour and a half (but I usually break it up - half in the AM and half in the PM, because my knees bother me). And I do a few dvds to begin lifting weights every other day. I will join a gym when I'm ready.

You can do this Tom!!! - I'd love to have you as a friend, if you don't have too many already. lol Add me if you like - I will be there for you when you need me. (Plus I don't have any man friends and would love to have one.)

amandax84x

Hi
just joined this along with starting insanity a week ago and slimming world a month ago

frugalafterfifty

I too live within a strict food budget. I see you live in New Jersey which has lots of lovely summer produce? Do you have a freezer? I buy lots of fruits and veges in bulk during the summer months and freeze, dehydrate and can so that we will have them during the winter months when things are more expensive in the store. Perhaps you might be able to freeze some of those wonderful Jersey tomatoes for the winter time. Feel free to message me if you have any questions. There's tons of information on the net about it.

Good for you!

mikemsu

Welcome to MFP, Tom. Keeping track of everything I eat is the best tool I've ever used and I've already learned so much about nutrition so far. I have a smart phone with the MFP app on it as well as a laptop, so everything I eat get logged on here. I also am working with a good nutritionist to help set goals for a good balance of Protein (VERY important), Fat (yes, fat - sometimes with all the fat-free foods, I've found myself actually low some days), and Carbs. I didn't even have a specific weight loss goal when I first started, but just to eat healthy and get moving more. Later, I've set short term goals and dates and each step is a victory. I also had cut out ALL sodas (was only drinking diet, but lots of it) and am basically on just water for liquids and LOTS of it.
One of the best advices I got early on was: "Concentrate on the foods you CAN eat, not the ones you can't." So true - I'm eating very well, trying lots of new things and loving it, trying to eat very little processed foods, and really eating everything I want to get to my goals. For me, eating 5 to 6 times a day works great and feels good for my body. I started out at 375 and have lost 79 lbs. so far!
Best wishes on your journey. I would be glad to help in any way if I can.
Mike