FRs without messages

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24

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  • dez_yaoichan
    dez_yaoichan Posts: 454
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    I don't require a message but I do prefer one just so I know a little about this person (most messages are saying how we have similar goals or views)

    what I do require is for the person to have info on their profile. if i'm going to share my goals and motivations, I expect the same
  • mister_universe
    mister_universe Posts: 6,664 Member
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    I don't accept any friend requests

    Speaking of famous last words...
  • AlongCame_Molly
    AlongCame_Molly Posts: 2,835 Member
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    I already have more friends than I can easily support, so I certainly do not add friends who don't add a note with a really good reason as to why they want to be friends. And even then I am starting to have to be really selective.

    It's irritating, but at the same time if someone's too dumb to follow a simple request on the first line of my profile, or too lazy to even read it, I don't need them clogging up my feed. Pretty simple way of weeding out people who I would only eventually end up deleting anyways.
  • SDkitty
    SDkitty Posts: 446 Member
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    I always include a nude with mine...no other messages....nothing else is really needed. :smokin: :smokin:

    Now THAT'S the spirit! :drinker: LOL
  • harvo
    harvo Posts: 4,676 Member
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    Honestly, I require a massage...or a junk pic or just a FR...but hey, I am a bit fickle
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
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    I will typically decline without a message unless I've noticed them around the forums, we have mutual friends, or something in their profile strikes a chord.
  • MizTerry
    MizTerry Posts: 3,763 Member
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    It depends. If I get a FR, I click on their profile to see if we have anything in common. I have found that if they don't send a note with a FR, they most likely won't post anything over diary entries, exercises and weight lost. It's kind of a bummer seeing as I'm more a social person with a wry sense of humor.
  • obeseandsassy
    obeseandsassy Posts: 118
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    this little journey is very personal to me, and i actually took time to write out my profile (which of course, does say that i don't accept requests without messages.) if someone sends me a request without a message, it proves to me that they didn't care enough to actually read my profile, so why would they care in supporting me on my journey?
  • RickNeedzToGetShreaded
    RickNeedzToGetShreaded Posts: 293 Member
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    You should create a template, like an application to be your friend (Sarcasm).
  • BleedsCoffee
    BleedsCoffee Posts: 247 Member
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    I appreciate a message and am more inclined to accept an FR if there's one with it, but I'm not terribly annoyed if there isn't one. I'm just more likely to decline the request. I really do make an effort to support everyone that I friend, so I don't want to over-extend the friends list.
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    its irritating but understandable. I mean, to many folks who don't socialize much on MFP forums it might be just an topional thing and in their mind... who could possibly refuse a new friend?!?! Thats what we're on this support site for right? To get friends who support each other?

    They haven't realized that part yet.

    Also, on cell phone apps I think there is no add message box (I think. Correct me if wrong)

    Then there are people who simply add without looking at a profile.

    Then you get people who assume you already know them (when you don't really).

    In the end, not a big deal. There could be worst things. Like a message saying "Lets be Pals!". My answer is always always "Calm down and lets not"
  • AlbertJDaniel
    AlbertJDaniel Posts: 13
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    If you don't accept fr without a message that your choice just delete it and move on.
  • BleedsCoffee
    BleedsCoffee Posts: 247 Member
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    Taunto has a good point. I once received a FR with the message "Hey, so ur a dominatrix?". Yes, I am a Dominatrix. No, I don't want to be friends with you based upon you finding that interesting.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    I care more about their goals and whether or not I might be of assistance to them or vice versa. My FL has grown a lot in the past 6 months or so, and I'm finding it more difficult to keep up with everyone, so I have stopped accepting every request I get. If there's no message, I will check out the person's profile. If it looks like we might have some goals in common and could help each other, then I'll add them. If not, or if their profile is empty or hidden, I'll decline.
  • C12254
    C12254 Posts: 198
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    I dont put much thought into it. personally i find it difficult to send a genuine message to strangers. but i refuse to use a generic message for everyone too. if im sending a FR its because we have similar goals or i find you to be inspiring. i used to include messages with requests and no one ever replied to the message anyways. so it was a waste of my time trying to think of things to write.
  • melindasuefritz
    melindasuefritz Posts: 3,509 Member
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    no i dont care
    and sometimes i dont send people a message just the friends requst
    and sometimes i do send message
    dont let it bother u
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    I generally check out the person's profile. If that's blocked and it's a guy I decline, if their profile is private and it's a chick I double check to see if they're a member of my community group before I make a decision. However, if your profile is set to private it doesn't matter if you explicitly request a message or not, they can't see your "about me" section to read that.
  • JuneyJo
    JuneyJo Posts: 182 Member
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    I don't mean to be a troll, but don't you just find it really annoying when you get a friend request without a message, especially when the first sentence on your profile states very clearly that a message or note is required when sending a friend request?

    How many of you here get FRs without messages when you've made it clear that one should be included? As much as I hate doing it, I ignore FRs with no messages. I don't care how hot the person in the avatar is!

    If your profile is only viewable by friends, people sending you requests can't see your request. I haven't trolled your profile so it might not be the issue here, I've just noticed that on a few of my now-friends.
  • Missjulesdid
    Missjulesdid Posts: 1,444 Member
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    I think it's a pretty good idea to read someone's profile before sending a friend request.. also it's nice to send a note to explaining why you think you should be friends. I have around 70 friends and we are all pretty actively logging so it's hard to keep up with the friends I already have.. but if someone really seems like we'd give each other good support then I'll accept.

    I received a request from a woman whose name and pic I recognized because she had been ranting in a thread about how Weight Loss Surgery was the quitter's way out and how she had zero respect for anyone who would even consider it, and how infuriating she found if a weight loss surgery patient would comment to her about trying to control portions.. because they "don't understand how hard it is to do it the RIGHT way" (she was around 200 pounds over weight, over eating by a lot, and hadn't been able to lose any weight yet) ... blah blah blah.. Did she even READ my profile where I clearly stated that I had WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY IN MARCH??????
  • AlbertJDaniel
    AlbertJDaniel Posts: 13
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    change your setting if it is a major problem for you.

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