I don't think I can do it

Francl27

Feeling very down today. It seems I'm stuck in this cycle... I manage to keep a deficit for a couple days, then I get absolutely ravenous the next day and end up wiping my deficit. At the end of the week, I'm typically a couple hundreds calories over maintenance... which isn't a huge deal, but at this rate I'll end up gaining 6-10 pounds in a year.

How do I stop it? I mean, what I eat seems to have no impact whatsoever. I don't typically eat a lot of high calorie/low satiety foods anyway, but I can have a waffle some days and be totally fine and keep a 200 calorie deficit, then the next day I'll have 7 servings of veggies and I'll be starving (and yes, if I'm tired and hungry I might not end up making the best choices either, to make it worse). Exercise seems to make no difference either, I can do 45 minutes of HIITs one day and be just fine, then do a 30 minute walk or bike session the next day and be totally starving (and weights, typically, but that's at the end of the day, so it doesn't make much of a difference).

I just don't know what to do anymore. It was EASY for me to lose until I got to 135 pounds or so. My goal is 130 and I still haven't seen it. I've been stuck at 132-133 for 6 months because I just get so hungry. Heck I was eating more 'junk' before. My willpower is not that bad, it's just that when I get hungry (and get those carb cravings), it's much harder to resist (like last night - I mean yeah, I had a waffle and an English muffin with hazelnut butter, but those typically fill me up pretty well, and the day before I had a waffle, chocolate and a Clif bar and I was totally fine?).

My hunger has always been very subjective to hormonal changes, so it's not really new, but I just don't know what to do. I'm terrified of gaining the weight back, but that kind of hunger, it just seems to be nothing I can do about it. Plus I don't always sleep very well and I tend to wake up starving at 5am, which just makes things worse.

And before you ask, yes I drink a lot of water, pretty much all day.

(putting this in maintenance because at this point, I'd just like to be able to maintain, if anything)

ThePhoenixIsRising

What does your fat look like on a daily/weekly basis

Francl27

60-70g. Typically protein is 120g or more. I've been trying to increase my fat with nuts and nut butter, and switching to full fat cheese/2% yogurt, but I haven't really noticed more satiety when I do. I mean, oatmeal with nut butter used to keep me full for 4 hours, now I'm hungry after 2.

ThePhoenixIsRising

Have you always eaten so many meals in a day? Some people find it helps but some find it triggers hunger signals more frequently.

Francl27

It depends. I eat when I get hungry. I've tried eating bigger meals... I was still getting hungry faster than I wanted to.

logg1e

2 or 3lb is not a significant amount, although I respect your wish to get to 130lb. I would advise you aiming for maintenance and then sticking there for a few weeks before trying another cut.

ThePhoenixIsRising

Are you afraid of hunger for a short time? Is it really hunger or is it something else?

When losing weight you have to be comfortable or at least accept hunger as part of the equation.

There is a difference between a bit of peckish hunger and true my body needs more cals hunger.

It comes down to what you are willing to do, the body doesn't want to lose weight, and will fight you till you chose to take control.

Juvenica

I agree with logg1e , maybe you are pushing too hard , try maintaining , and see where you go from there. you might even loose weight.

Francl27

There are two kinds of hunger for me. Normal hunger, that doesn't bother me one bit, and hunger that makes me feel weak/dizzy, and that's the one that is making the whole thing really hard... but it's the one I get the most.

But I've pretty much been trying to maintain, I mean at this point when I manage to keep a deficit, it's pretty much so I can make up for a day when I went over. It's a total vicious cycle, lol. But I've been going over while still being hungry, which is what is worrying me.

I mean, I can find a filling low calorie meal, and two weeks later I have it again and it doesn't fill me up at all. It is SO frustrating. Or I keep reading about what people find 'filling' and shaking my head because that wouldn't fill me up for more than 2 hours.

My goal weight isn't even that low at all, most women my height (5'5") aim for 125!

ThePhoenixIsRising

Francl27 wrote: »

There are two kinds of hunger for me. Normal hunger, that doesn't bother me one bit, and hunger that makes me feel weak/dizzy, and that's the one that is making the whole thing really hard... but it's the one I get the most.

But I've pretty much been trying to maintain, I mean at this point when I manage to keep a deficit, it's pretty much so I can make up for a day when I went over. It's a total vicious cycle, lol.

Francl27 wrote: »

There are two kinds of hunger for me. Normal hunger, that doesn't bother me one bit, and hunger that makes me feel weak/dizzy, and that's the one that is making the whole thing really hard... but it's the one I get the most.

But I've pretty much been trying to maintain, I mean at this point when I manage to keep a deficit, it's pretty much so I can make up for a day when I went over. It's a total vicious cycle, lol.

Weak and dizzy after 2-3 hrs isn't normal. I'm gonna say talk to a dr and get blood work done.

Francl27

I've had blood work done, everything was normal. But it mostly happens when I ovulate or before/during AF (which is pretty much 2 weeks). I've always been very sensitive to hormonal changes unfortunately... Even the lowest dose pill was making me sick, and when I did IVF 9 years ago my body reacted way too strongly to the normal dose of hormones.

I've been trying to delay my next meals more but if I overdo it, I'm just more likely to get ravenous and overeat.

I'm stocking up on baby carrots as they seem to help some, but sheesh, seriously, it really upsets me. I feel like I'm making excuses but then I know that when it happens, if I don't eat, it just gets way worse.

cwlsr

I will keep it short! I discern that this is a mental attitude problem and not a physical problem. I will explain. Change your "focus" from a weight and food problem to a let me be "healthy physically and mentally." You have already been successful in losing weight and what is a pound or two to having a happy life with less worry about weight. Finally be thankful since you have lost weight where so many have failed in their efforts to do the same. Throw out the words "maintain and manage" and just focus on developing a daily fixed routine of balanced living. Congratulations on your past success.

ThePhoenixIsRising

Francl27 wrote: »

I've had blood work done, everything was normal. But it mostly happens when I ovulate or before/during AF (which is pretty much 2 weeks). I've always been very sensitive to hormonal changes unfortunately... Even the lowest dose pill was making me sick, and when I did IVF 9 years ago my body reacted way too strongly to the normal dose of hormones.

I've been trying to delay my next meals more but if I overdo it, I'm just more likely to get ravenous and overeat.

I'm stocking up on baby carrots as they seem to help some, but sheesh, seriously, it really upsets me. I feel like I'm making excuses but then I know that when it happens, if I don't eat, it just gets way worse.

If you have past hormone issues that haven't been resolved I would have your dr take a closer look. Being dizzy if you don't eat every 2-3 hours is not something to let them brush off as normal hormone fluctuations especially with your sensativity.

sugaraddict4321

I know you probably don't want to hear this, but maybe try to stop fixating on the number on the scale? Your body might be perfectly happy between 130 and 135. Instead, focus on how you feel and how your clothes fit. If you still want to go for a deficit, try a smaller one for a longer time instead of a bigger one for a shorter time. You might have better and more lasting results. For example, aim for 0.5 pounds per week. That's a deficit of 250 calories per day. Just remember, you are the one in control. Don't give up.!

cwolfman13

Maybe take a break and just do maintenance for awhile...it's good for the soul.

I lost about 40 Lbs over the course of 9 months...I hit my goal weight, but still had a higher BF% than I preferred...but I was in the healthy range and I was tired of dieting, etc so I went to maintenance.

I spent 18 month in maintenance...really focused on my nutrition and my fitness....I learned how to live "normally" again and maintain my weight, etc without using my diary. It was an outstanding and educational exercise for me.

After 18 months of maintaining, I'm finally in the right place to get myself where I really want to be from an aesthetics standpoint. I'm around 17% BF right now and I'm trying to cut to around 10-12%...it's slow going, as it should be given that it's only about 10-15 Lbs or so...but my head is in a way better place now that I've maintained for so long...it's not so bothersome watching the scale go really, really, really slow. I'm also working with a coach right now and he's helping me keep more focus on my fitness and athleticism with the drop in weight kind of being an aside...

scrittrice

Francl27 wrote: »

I've had blood work done, everything was normal. But it mostly happens when I ovulate or before/during AF (which is pretty much 2 weeks). I've always been very sensitive to hormonal changes unfortunately... Even the lowest dose pill was making me sick, and when I did IVF 9 years ago my body reacted way too strongly to the normal dose of hormones.

I've been trying to delay my next meals more but if I overdo it, I'm just more likely to get ravenous and overeat.

I'm stocking up on baby carrots as they seem to help some, but sheesh, seriously, it really upsets me. I feel like I'm making excuses but then I know that when it happens, if I don't eat, it just gets way worse.

I just want to say that I was having a very similar issue (very strong head rushes), and I think mine was hormonal as well. I'm older than you are and ovulate very sporadically, and when I do I REALLY feel it in myriad ways, including intense hunger (and often I "gain" as many as 7 pounds overnight, then lose them two weeks later like magic). I upped my calories to what MFP thought was maintenance and then beyond that and still lost weight and the dizziness went away. I know that's not helpful, because that's what you're doing already, but I wanted you to know that you're not alone. Also, lifting weights makes me very hungry, and I don't think it matters that you do it at the end of the day, as the effect lasts a long time for me--that may account for your intense hunger at 5 a.m. Eating something right after I finish (or even sometimes while I'm still lifting) often mitigates the effect somewhat. I like exercising for the sake of exercise (I think it's fun), but I do notice that on days when I just get exercise from walking (I eat back FitBit calories) rather than, say, a bike ride, food is on my mind a lot less. Maybe you need a rest day or a rest week. It would be interesting to see what that does to your appetite. I agree that NOT feeding that kind of hunger only makes it worse.

Short version: I feel you, and I don't think it's all mental or that you're whining. And I think you can do it.

themedalist

sugaraddict4321 wrote: »

I know you probably don't want to hear this, but maybe try to stop fixating on the number on the scale? Your body might be perfectly happy between 130 and 135. Instead, focus on how you feel and how your clothes fit. If you still want to go for a deficit, try a smaller one for a longer time instead of a bigger one for a shorter time. You might have better and more lasting results. For example, aim for 0.5 pounds per week. That's a deficit of 250 calories per day. Just remember, you are the one in control. Don't give up.!

1000 times this! Seriously, you are well within a healthy range for your height, 5'5. I am also 5'5, but weigh more than you do. I'm not constantly fighting my body, insisting that it get down to an arbitrary number that I've selected.

You've achieved so much already...losing 81 pounds is terrific and maintaining it is even more impressive! Focus on your health and increasing your fitness instead of an arbitrary scale number and I think you'll be much happier.

TossaBeanBag

I keep busy, which keeps my mind off having to eat. I have projects going on. I think keeping my protein levels at 45% of my calories keeps the hunger monster away. Like you already said, water is important, and you are drinking plenty. Then, if I really want something, I have it, but I choose to burn the fat off and not try to starve it off. Any calorie deficit I have is from exercise. This approach is working great, keeping me happier, and hopefully healthier. I

By the way, I think you can do it.

tessyreys

Try keeping your carbs below 100g per day and your sugar below 25g per day. I find the my ravenous addictive kind of hunger turns on when my carbs or sugar levels are too high. Once I drop them below the stated amounts, I find myself forgetting to eat and the obsessive thinking is gone. Sugar does something to the hormone balance of your hunger systems.

socalkay

"Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right." ~ Henry Ford.

myfitnesspale3

to OP: yup, big congratulations on your loss. Elevenses, pretty funny.

+1 reduce carbs to reduce hunger. You like morning meals, and those breads, waffles, and quick-oatmeal will tend to increase hunger in 1-2 hours. Starting the day with more protein like more eggs, and for example switching to REGULAR/slow-oatmeal. FYI protein bars still pack a significant carb load.

One great addition to menu is one-minute-muffin-in-a-mug based on ground flaxseed - easy and fast. If you can sub that for one of your breads (load up the butter) then that is probably helpful to your goals. Every little change can improve satiety.

Francl27

But that's the thing. I've tried eggs in the morning, and it doesn't fill me up one bit. I need fiber. And when I have oatmeal, I typically add some nut butter or extra fiber to keep me full longer.

I eat whole wheat English muffins because, mixed with nut butter, most days it will keep me full too. The waffles, well I only had some for a couple days, and I had no problem with feeling hungry for 2 out of those 3 days. The protein bars I usually eat are Quests and they only have 5g of active carbs. I got the Clif to use before my HIITs and they've been working well, and actually keeping me pretty full (and again... no hunger issue so far on the two days I've eaten them).

So I hear you, I know carbs are 'the devil' and all that, but in my experience, whole grains don't have that effect on me. And typically I eat them with protein and fat too. If I just have cake or ice cream... sure. But it's not that often lately... I stick to carbs that have a good amount of fiber. And again, the hunger I experience doesn't seem to have any correlation with what I'm eating (except that carbs is what typically works best to fill me up on those days too). I've tried to see a pattern, but so far, I got nothing.

logg1e

If you're telling us it's genuine hunger and not thirst or comfort eating then you need to decide whether you choose hunger or putting on weight I guess.

Francl27

logg1e wrote: »

If you're telling us it's genuine hunger and not thirst or comfort eating then you need to decide whether you choose hunger or putting on weight I guess.

That's what sucks! It just seems not many people are experiencing the same thing. And people are telling me to just eat at maintenance, but I can't even manage to do that. It seems to have got worse since I started doing more intense workouts too.

It's funny because I'm actually hungry right now but it doesn't bother me. So it's definitely not an every day thing, but one day of it seems to be enough to wipe out any tiny deficit I might have achieved.

cwolfman13

Francl27 wrote: »

logg1e wrote: »

If you're telling us it's genuine hunger and not thirst or comfort eating then you need to decide whether you choose hunger or putting on weight I guess.

That's what sucks! It just seems not many people are experiencing the same thing. And people are telling me to just eat at maintenance, but I can't even manage to do that. It seems to have got worse since I started doing more intense workouts too.

It's funny because I'm actually hungry right now but it doesn't bother me. So it's definitely not an every day thing, but one day of it seems to be enough to wipe out any tiny deficit I might have achieved.

Are you sure you even know what your maintenance is? You say you are eating over maintenance...but are you really...or are you just eating over what some random calculator tells you is maintenance?

Guess what...if you're working out more and with more intensity...your TDEE (AKA maintenance) calories go up. When I'm training for endurance rides, my maintenance can be upwards of 3500 calories. When I'm just working out and maintaining my fitness like I am now, my maintenance is 2800 - 3000 calories.

Your maintenance is variable. This is why I think you should take a break...you're at a healthy weight...get comfortable for awhile...LEARN what maintenance actually is...then if you want to cut some more down the road your head will be in a better place and you'll have a much better understanding of what is actually going on.

stackhsc

any additional or new stresses in life? especially on days you feel you are going over?
as for the exercise, are you eating the calories back? are the calories accurately tracked for the exercise?
maybe set a new goal, lower but still healthy goal? sometimes its easier to let your mind relax as you close in on a goal? just throwing ideas out there

PrizePopple

cwolfman13 wrote: »

Francl27 wrote: »

logg1e wrote: »

If you're telling us it's genuine hunger and not thirst or comfort eating then you need to decide whether you choose hunger or putting on weight I guess.

That's what sucks! It just seems not many people are experiencing the same thing. And people are telling me to just eat at maintenance, but I can't even manage to do that. It seems to have got worse since I started doing more intense workouts too.

It's funny because I'm actually hungry right now but it doesn't bother me. So it's definitely not an every day thing, but one day of it seems to be enough to wipe out any tiny deficit I might have achieved.

Are you sure you even know what your maintenance is? You say you are eating over maintenance...but are you really...or are you just eating over what some random calculator tells you is maintenance?

Guess what...if you're working out more and with more intensity...your TDEE (AKA maintenance) calories go up. When I'm training for endurance rides, my maintenance can be upwards of 3500 calories. When I'm just working out and maintaining my fitness like I am now, my maintenance is 2800 - 3000 calories.

Your maintenance is variable. This is why I think you should take a break...you're at a healthy weight...get comfortable for awhile...LEARN what maintenance actually is...then if you want to cut some more down the road your head will be in a better place and you'll have a much better understanding of what is actually going on.

I've been reading for a little bit, and I think this might be it. Your maintenance/TDEE is likely higher than you think it is since you increased your exercise. Go recalculate it for your increased activity and see what you get.

Francl27

Well I'm assuming I am eating at maintenance, as I haven't lost anything in 3 months. I don't eat exercise calories back as I just eat at TDEE. I weigh everything I eat too so I don't think I'm overestimating (I could be for veggies as I use steam in the bag veggies and they give the frozen weight for a serving though, which obviously is impossible to figure out as it COOKS IN THE BAG. Idiots).

And no stress.

ThePhoenixIsRising

Have you gained back your 5ish lbs of water/glycogen weight since you upped your cals?
If not you are in a SLOW deficit

Francl27

No but I took my calories up very slowly, basically from 500 to 300 to 'eat at maintenance and try to keep a small deficit when I'm not too hungry' LOL.

TossaBeanBag

Listen to your body. If you are exercising a whole bunch, you might consider raising your calories for a bit; lower them on the rest days. It is easier to burn the fat off than starve it off.