I don't know how to stop binging

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  • mccbabe1
    mccbabe1 Posts: 737 Member
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    It's not about being hungry. I will often eat until I'm on the verge of vomiting. I understand that I have a serious problem. Even if I take my own snacks to work (which I did today) I will eat them TOO or I'll eat the other snacks instead.

    I use to be the same way as a kid, I was 175 lbs at the age of 10 and lost over 60 lbs at 12 years old and kept it off until I hit 25 (last year) new job, new life, more stress, full time student, wife, etc. Food was the way I dealt with life ya know before I knew it I was up to 196 lbs. But all that changed in one night. After loosing 10 lbs in 2 months, one night I ate 2 pints of Chicken fried rice, half of a pizza and 24 cookies. My legs became swollen as well as my feet (they would usually swell up if I ate a lot of sugar or sodium), I had a hard time breathing, and my whole body began to shake and sweating profusely and I broke down and started crying in the shower I was so afraid that I had done something to myself that I couldn't undo.

    I really understand where you are coming from. I had a rather emotionally challenging childhood I was teased a lot in school, bullied, and had no friends and I was raised by a single parent my daddy and food was really comforting for me. But that day that the incident happen is the day i realized that I had a problem I had a lot of emotional baggage and i didn't want to deal with it and it was dealing with me, I would go on crazy food binges after big weight loss successes and sit in my car and cry because I felt like i was sabotaging myself.

    But once I made up my mind to lose weight there was nothing that could get in my way, when I didn't have access to a gym the house/furniture became my weight room, if I didn't have access to a microwave I would either go to the gas station down the street or take a cold lunch to work. It's all about prevention don't wait until you get hungry to eat. I eat about 8-12 times day ( I don't go longer than a hour without food) I just changed what I eat. I too sought counseling which was very very helpful I moved about 2 hours away from the place I was raised (not for that reason, i transferred colleges) and it really has been a breath of fresh air for me.

    My advice is to take your weight loss very slow, to experience every stage and emotion because it is a very emotional journey, Pray and read the Bible for strength. Find out your triggers/reason you find comfort in food. Explore things you like to take you mind off of food. Lastly, If I were you I would ask my employer to put a microwave in the lounge area or if you could bring a reasonable sized one and put it on your desk. I do sincerely wish you all the best I know it's hard but this can be done, take care :-)

    ^^^^ Best advice given on here.. esp the reading the bible and praying..."I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me"! Philippians 4:13... my LIFE VERSE... i still struggle daily as well with bing eating.. not as much VOLUME 'now' as I used to be.. I used to also eat until I nearly vomited.. now its more random cravings and not good choices.. and not always tracking either... but God has brought me from the person in the morning that couldn't even talk to you without a cup of coffee and lazy mornings.. to the person that gets up NO COFFEE and goes walking before work!... things CAN change! stay posotive and seek help.. before your body speaks for you..wit Diabeties or some other ilness
  • BananaFaceFace
    BananaFaceFace Posts: 70 Member
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    Its sounds to me like you're not ready for change and are very resistant to changing your lifestyle. Many people go through years of this resistance before they feel they are ready.

    It sounds like you want a better life but you are not prepared to take the steps that are necessary to get you there. I suggest that If you cannot find the time to get help or refuse to make the time, try phone counselling for a start.

    No one can make you do this, its up to you when you decide that you're ready to take charge of your life and believe you can but you don't have to do it alone.

    Avoidance will not make this better, I apologise if this is confronting but its the truth.

    Love yourself enough to create a better life.

    *source* Im a qualified counsellor and finished two years of study on people who are resistant to change.
  • j6o4
    j6o4 Posts: 871 Member
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    You don't need any sort of meetings or counseling. You just need a serious wake up call. Other people have acknowledged that you have a mental problem, but I don't believe in that. Once you believe you have some sort of mental problem or uncontrollable addiction, you believe that you are incapable of fixing it because its out of your control. You are welcoming weakness. And if you welcome that weakness, you deserve what it brings with it. If you want to stay overweight, keep going to work, eating a bunch of free snacks, then go home and eat a whole box of cheez-its, and then get online and say that you know you have a problem but you just can't stop doing it.

    Just because you were weak in the past does not mean you have to stay weak forever. Everybody has periods of weakness, it's unavoidable. But you cannot wallow in it or sustain it indefinitely, you have to LEARN from it. Make today the day that you give that weak **** up.

    Start better habits today. Use a TDEE method to set your daily calorie goals, using a sedentary lifestyle and a 20% deficit. This will still give you plenty of calories to consume in a day. If you don't understand what that means, ask for help and there are many MFPers who would gladly help you. Don't think losing weight is limiting yourself to eating chicken breasts and vegetables at every meal. Eat your favorite foods, just more responsible portions of it. Buy yourself a food scale and weigh EVERYTHING before you put it in your mouth. Track the food daily on your MFP food diary, and make your diary public so when you post, everybody can see what you're doing. Weigh yourself weekly and track it in MFP so you can see what course you're on. As you read this, you're already making excuses in your head. Do you want to be weak and overweight forever?

    If you want a serious psychological impact to get your *kitten* in gear, do all of your binging in front of a mirror. Next time you get the urge to down an entire box of cheese snacks, take that box into your bedroom, lock the door, and stand in front of a mirror in your underwear as you eat them. When you can see the effect those little cheese snacks has already had, does eating a whole box of them still make you happy? Take a small mirror to work to place on your desk, and when you can't stop snacking away on free junk food and slush drinks, watch yourself binge away. Look yourself right in the eyes and try to convince yourself that you know its a problem but you just can't stop it. I know you won't be able to, because you're not convincing me either.

    Its your mind and you're free to control it. Stop telling yourself you're a victim of disorder or addiction. Stop telling yourself you don't know how to stop binging. Stop making excuses because nobody is going to buy into them. Stop trying to fool yourself because you already know there's a problem. Stop accepting weakness as a way of life.

    Embrace your strength. Embrace truth. Embrace change.

    ^^ THIS MAN SPEAKS THE TRUTH!!! What you wrote was long but well worth reading!
  • gonnamakeanewaccount
    gonnamakeanewaccount Posts: 642 Member
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    Unfortunately I work 55 hours a week, so it's not possible to attend any sort of meeting.

    make time

    QFT

    If you really want to find a way, you will. You can either make the decision to stop shoving food in your mouth when your not hungry or admit you might have a problem and need help and find a way to fix it.

    Time may be scarce but you shot down that idea without even looking into the program and seeing if there is a time slot you can make. The majority of us have jobs, kids, or both...but making time for what is going to end up helping you is worth the effort.

    Posting on an internet forum might help for about 3 seconds, but if you shoot down the sound advice with excuses, then you're not really ready to do what it takes to make it happen.

    Ok, fine. I'll play. The ONE meeting in my area in a time and day that I can attend is 15 miles away. I'm aware of OA and I have read all about OA. I am not a religious person and I do not need to find god. I do not need to be preached to. I shot it down without going any further because I didn't want to offend people. Obviously I have not been afforded that same courtesy here.

    OA meetings have nothing to do with "finding God."
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
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    wow. you come here looking for help. a few people suggest OA meetings, telling you to make time (because it's worth it and can actually help you) and you come off all snooty and on the defensive saying how you work 55 hours a week and don't need to be preached to and don't believe in god.

    you know, don't ask me tips on how to play soccer, but neglect to tell me you only have one leg.

    fine, you don't want to be preached to. i get that.... wait, no i don't. you need to be 'preached to' to overcome your problem. in AA they have a 90 meetings in 90 days rules for newbies, in the hopes that it sinks in. you obviously can't make it due to your job (which we were somehow supposed to just know???). but this is just like the people who bash crossfit without ever having tried a class.

    make it to a meeting once. just go. do it. in fact, go to two meetings so you can really really get a good evaluation of the thing. the closest one is 15 miles?? HOLY EFFING SQUIRRL BALLS is that really far away for you?? or are you just making another excuse not to get yourself better? just like the free snacks in the kitchen, and the whole "i sit down for work 8 hour days."
  • kathymhardy
    kathymhardy Posts: 266 Member
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    I'm taking this from a thread that was posted a while back...

    Enduring chemotherapy is hard.

    Hitting a fast ball in the major leagues in hard.

    Negotiating nuclear disarmament from a hostile nation is hard.

    Saying goodbye to a loved one in the hospital or the veterinarian’s office for the last time is hard.

    Putting down the fork and telling yourself to stop eating is not hard. Mind over matter. If you want to lose weight and make a change, then will it to happen and be accountable. Make the change

    Makes sense
  • khall86790
    khall86790 Posts: 1,100 Member
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    Unfortunately I work 55 hours a week, so it's not possible to attend any sort of meeting.


    If I'm being totally honest with you, you do not sound like you want this enough.
    Yes, working 55 hours a week is hard but if you really wanted to attend meetings like this, you could find a way. Maybe it's an extra 30-40 minute drive or a bus journey, but you could go to one in another town/area that did suit your schedule. Alternatively, find a support group online.

    As for the food, I too was surrounded by junk food and crap when I first started using MFP.... I still am as in my line of work I work with children who regularly snack on cookies, breads, etc. but all you have to do is tell yourself no.
    Bring yourself in healthy snacks from home, drink lots of water and remind yourself of how much better it is for you to not eat that crap. Not only is it bad for your waist line but it's bad for your skin and overall health...not to mention it's making you miserable.

    YOU are in control of all the things you have complained about so far and you personally do have the power to say yes or no to all of these things.
  • khall86790
    khall86790 Posts: 1,100 Member
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    Unfortunately I work 55 hours a week, so it's not possible to attend any sort of meeting.

    make time

    QFT

    If you really want to find a way, you will. You can either make the decision to stop shoving food in your mouth when your not hungry or admit you might have a problem and need help and find a way to fix it.

    Time may be scarce but you shot down that idea without even looking into the program and seeing if there is a time slot you can make. The majority of us have jobs, kids, or both...but making time for what is going to end up helping you is worth the effort.

    Posting on an internet forum might help for about 3 seconds, but if you shoot down the sound advice with excuses, then you're not really ready to do what it takes to make it happen.

    Ok, fine. I'll play. The ONE meeting in my area in a time and day that I can attend is 15 miles away. I'm aware of OA and I have read all about OA. I am not a religious person and I do not need to find god. I do not need to be preached to. I shot it down without going any further because I didn't want to offend people. Obviously I have not been afforded that same courtesy here.

    OA meetings have nothing to do with "finding God."

    Plus nobody here would be offended if you aren't religious. This isn't a religious forum, we have people from all different religions here.
  • russellbrand69
    russellbrand69 Posts: 132 Member
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    Its sounds to me like you're not ready for change and are very resistant to changing your lifestyle. Many people go through years of this resistance before they feel they are ready.
    .....
    Avoidance will not make this better, I apologise if this is confronting but its the truth.
    Love yourself enough to create a better life.
    *source* Im a qualified counsellor and finished two years of study on people who are resistant to change.

    This is excellent advice. In the last few years I've stopped biting my nails, stopped smoking, and I'm in the process of losing weight right now.
    I've only ever been successful when I felt I was truly ready to change.
  • daisyboo84
    daisyboo84 Posts: 37
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    You say you want your career to be this job and you don't want to ruin your life by leaving it: HEADS UP you WILL ruin your life by killing yourself if you continue like this.

    Take yourself out a temptations way. I am a big smoker, if i'm in an environment where it is not possible to smoke (i.e. a long haul flight) then I do not smoke, because you cannot, but if you sit me at a table at the pub on a summers evening with a pint of shandy, you bet i'll get through that whole pack.

    Recognise the REAL issue with the food, what it will do to your body. When I am trying to be good, every little thing is counted, when I give up, sure, I can eat half a pack of biscuits one at a time and pretend it doesn't matter.

    Realise how uncomfortable you are, how tight your jeans are when you sit at your desk, how you get out of breath to walk up stairs and think "Do I really want that extra cup of chex mix?"

    Remember that 500 calories over each day equals ONE KILOGRAM of weight per week (that's 2.2 pounds!)

    Of course you don't want to leave your job, they are enabling you, they are feeding you.

    Photograph every bite you eat, and at the end of the day look at those pictures and realise just how much you are putting into your body.

    Just like drugs and alcohol, food can destroy your body, it can give you the same high, but it is killing you. Until you really recognise this you won't find the strength to stop yourself.

    If you've got any holiday, take it, maybe go away somewhere a=out of foods reach, take only healthy options, and notice when you eat well, how much better you feel, when your mind isn't bogelled by salt sugar and MSG, when you don't feel constantly sick and exhausted, and hold on to this feeling, remember it every time you want to fill that cup right back up.
  • helenx55
    helenx55 Posts: 48 Member
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    To change you must WANT to change!! noone was more addicted to food than i, i did live to eat. that is until i realised food was the very thing that made me unhappy, you can use any excuse you please but if you truly want this you WILL walk past the snacks you will achieve.
    walking up that steep hill without being out of breath, walking 6 miles for the sheer purpose of just having a walk is what keeps me focused.
    im not a saint by any means, i have a blip here and there but no amount of chips/choc/pastries is ever worth me feeling so miserable again.

    if you always do what youve always done, youll always be who you always was.


    change!
  • tjradd73
    tjradd73 Posts: 3,495 Member
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    binging is a horrible eating disorder...having to "recover" from it myself...i can safely say it sucks!! HOWEVER...it is like any disease...you cannot overcome it until you first admit you have the problem...then you have to be ready...until you are ready...nothing you do will work! end o' story!
  • leilaphoenix
    leilaphoenix Posts: 839 Member
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    If this was really important to you, which is should be considering how overweight you are, you should be making it your top priority. Lots of people work long hours but it doesn't stop them living healthy lives. You have a few options

    - go and get some professional help
    - join self-help accountability groups in your area
    - just stop eating so much. You are in control of what goes in your mouth. Stop putting so much food in your mouth.

    Any of these routes might work for you but only if you are going to make dealing with your weight and eating issues a priority. They should be your top priority. No "I don't have time". Yes, 55 hours a week is a lot of working but what are you doing with the rest of your time? You should be using all of it to start sorting our your problems.
  • PosterPens
    PosterPens Posts: 172 Member
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    Maybe I didn't make myself clear. I am looking for advice from people who have had binge eating problems in the past and have gotten past them. I am not making myself a victim. I have a serious mental issue and I cannot afford nor have time to get help for. I'm looking for advice, not rude *kitten* comments about how I'm making myself a victim.

    i think a LOT of us here on MFP were binge eaters at some point, or most of our lives. we've gained an exuberant amount of weight due to our lack of control of what went into our mouths. it takes sadness, hitting rock bottom, becoming obese to WANT to change our awful gluttonous habits to get to a point where you eventually learn that gorging on that food will only bring you regret and a whole hell of a lot more pounds on your body.

    once you reach that point of disgust, only then you will want to change. youll CHOOSE to not eat those foods. just because there are tons of snacks at work DOESNT MEAN you have to eat them. you, yourself, choose to. i have the most delicious, insane treats sent to my work daily, if not multiple times a day. I CHOOSE to not eat them. instead, ill bring my lunch and focus on my work.

    binging is a mental disorder. what void in your life are you really trying to fill?
  • tweetspie
    tweetspie Posts: 13 Member
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    wow. you come here looking for help. a few people suggest OA meetings, telling you to make time (because it's worth it and can actually help you) and you come off all snooty and on the defensive saying how you work 55 hours a week and don't need to be preached to and don't believe in god.

    you know, don't ask me tips on how to play soccer, but neglect to tell me you only have one leg.

    fine, you don't want to be preached to. i get that.... wait, no i don't. you need to be 'preached to' to overcome your problem. in AA they have a 90 meetings in 90 days rules for newbies, in the hopes that it sinks in. you obviously can't make it due to your job (which we were somehow supposed to just know???). but this is just like the people who bash crossfit without ever having tried a class.

    make it to a meeting once. just go. do it. in fact, go to two meetings so you can really really get a good evaluation of the thing. the closest one is 15 miles?? HOLY EFFING SQUIRRL BALLS is that really far away for you?? or are you just making another excuse not to get yourself better? just like the free snacks in the kitchen, and the whole "i sit down for work 8 hour days."

    How is saying that I work a lot of hours coming off as snooty? Someone made a suggestion and I shared how it wouldn't work for me and I said "unfortunately I work 55 hours a week." Are you offended that I have an amazing job and am a workaholic? Or are you mistaking my getting pissed at people basically telling me that I'm lazy and being flat out rude when I asked for help?

    I will probably never post in the forums again because of this post, the first topic I've created, getting so many *****y responses. I came here because I was under the impression that this was going to be a helpful, safe place, but clearly I was very wrong and I won't make this mistake again.
  • daisyboo84
    daisyboo84 Posts: 37
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    maybe read over your replies and try to understand why people are saying that's what you come across as.

    You did ask for help, and it may not be the answer you want, but you knew no one was going to say "oh I did that and after three weeks of binging I just didn't want to anymore!"

    I think maybe it's the fact that every idea people put forward you brush off.

    option one: Don't eat, use the will power you have, and do not put that food in your mouth

    answer"I can't do that as I have an addiction"

    2: go to an addiction counsellor

    answer" I can't, I have no time. I have a mental health issue"

    3. go see a mental health specialist

    answer: I can't I have no time. Go **** yourselves, my life is amazing and I don't need your help anyway!

    that's pretty much what we all read form you my love.

    Only you can help yourself, but first you have to want to.
  • jem5065
    jem5065 Posts: 28 Member
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    You could try weight loss hypnosis.. they specifically attack binge eating in one CD i have.. how to curb the cravings.. its easy because all you need is headphones and you can listen to it when at home before bed.. even if you fall asleep your subconscious will take it in... theres actually free apps on phone for some of the tracks too.. I know its a controversial subject but i got a groupon for a session to learn how to meditate and buy some CD's and when i was doing it it was SO EASY to just say no... and they ALWAYS had free snacks at work .. donuts, bagels, sandwiches, popcorn, soft pretzels.. all delicious and i could say no because I knew i had eaten lunch and i just had some urge in me not to go eat an unhealthy snack.. honestly If i wasnt waiting for my friend to burn my CD's i would still be doing it it was amazing.. something to really look into!
  • graysmom2005
    graysmom2005 Posts: 1,882 Member
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    Honey, I feel for you. It's like the food is talking to you. I get that. Great advice on bringing your own snacks. Maybe get some calorie free flavoring to put in water so it tastes like "something". Maybe post some inspirational pictures or quotes on your wall. Or even just the letters WIWM "What I Want More..." is.....what? ANOTHER slushy? Or to put on that pair of jeans and have them feel loose? Which do you want more? Right now you give in every time so you don't know what the other feels like. If for ONE day you can avoid the kitchen, you may have more faith in yourself.

    I also agree that you must MUST log it ALL. When you see the damage that is a great great tool. Willpower is like a muscle...it fatigues over time...so don't beat yourself up because a lot of it is emotional/mental. But that can't be a crutch. If any of these things don't work, finding time for counseling could be great for you.

    Keep us posted.
  • lauren3101
    lauren3101 Posts: 1,853 Member
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    You are sounding like you don't really want the help. Every suggestion everyone has come up with you have a reason why you can't do it. You can't attend a meeting because you work long hours. You can't avoid it because you need to walk past it. You can't bring in your own snacks because you eat them on top of the rest of it.

    I am a binge eater, and recently I've found it hard to get back on track, but I make no excuses. It's because I haven't got the motivation at the moment. At the end of the day, the only way you will ever beat this is to want to lose the weight more than you want the food, which at the moment, doesn't sound like that is the case.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
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    Maybe I didn't make myself clear. I am looking for advice from people who have had binge eating problems in the past and have gotten past them. I am not making myself a victim. I have a serious mental issue and I cannot afford nor have time to get help for. I'm looking for advice, not rude *kitten* comments about how I'm making myself a victim.

    Ok, I've read through this whole thread and I agree with some of the tough love posts. Before you think I'm attacking you, please understand that I suffered from anorexia, bulimia and laxative abuse in my younger years. I totally know what it's like to have a terrible relationship with food. But, I also know that it's not the food that's the problem. It's a control issue and, for that reason, you either need to tap into your willpower OR seek help from a support group or professional. Those are your only two options.

    I didn't have support when I decided I needed recovery. I was too young to afford anything or drive myself to meetings and my parents were fed up with me. I had to do it on my own. It is a day by day battle for a very long period of time. YOU have to wake up each morning and decide who you want to be that day and then live it. When I felt like binging, I took a walk, a shower or I played a game. When I felt like starving, I grazed throughout the day instead of eating a big meal. I began to make friends who didn't know how sick I had been and I didn't want to lose them because of my secret so I kept going down the right road. These tricks may not work for everyone, but they worked for me. The only way to find out what works for you is to try....and I mean REALLY try. If you can't squeeze time into your day to try, you don't want it bad enough. We all struggle with our schedules. It's just not a valid excuse.