Is it still worth doing if you know you will fail?

conniebug76

I've tried to lose weight many times in the past. I've generally stuck to counting calories and regular exercise. I know it works. It has worked in the past, and I know it should work in the future and always.

I know how to do this, but every time I start, I last a shorter and shorter time before I go off the rails. I don't stall out or hit a plateau. I just decide, "I'm going to eat that whole bag of Cheetos because reasons!" Then I binge for days, regain the weight I lost, and wallow in misery for a few months.

So now I'm feeling like I want to count calories again, to start exercising again, to do all the things that I know will work. But I am also afraid to even bother when I have such a track record of quitting.

I hate that I'm one of those people that loses and gains, loses and gains, but do I hate it enough? Do I need the answer to that question before I start?

I hate that I weigh 290. I hate that I can't do the things I want to do because my stomach gets in the way. I hate buying my bras from specialty stores.

I hate that I quit so easily, too. I don't know how to change it, though.

dawnna76

change your inner self, stop saying i cant or i will fail. say i can and i will succeed. then remove the junk from the house. cant eat a whole bag a cheetos if it isnt there! personally i love ice cream, cant buy it and keep at home cause i will eat it all in one sitting (no really) so if i want ice cream as a treat I have to get up and go get it at the ice cream shop. so i dont do it as often, one cause that is more work and it costs more!

conniebug76

So how do you "change your inner self?"

And you can eat a whole bag of Cheetos if it isn't there. You go to the store and buy it. It's actually pretty easy to do.

lborsato1

Attitude is a big part of the commitment to weight loss. You don't seem ready to do it, as you are already "failing" before you even start. You need to find a reason that motivates you before you can be successful. Good Luck !

SuggaD

No one can find motivation for you. You have to want it more than you want the Cheetos. Binges happen. But do you continue until you've undone all progress, or do you say the next day, well that made me feel bad and get back on track.

conniebug76

Well, that answers the question. I'll save change for another day. Thanks!

dawnna76

you start by stopping with the negitive talk. stop saying i cant. start saying yuou can and eventually you will believe it. your problem seems it may have more to do with self esteem and self control. maybe seeing a therapist might help.

MakePeasNotWar

Are you trying to fix everything all in one go and feeling deprived? That would make me eat a bag of cheetos, too. What if you just picked one or two small things to change, then once they were solid habits, take on another. Obviously you will lose more slowly, but if you can truly take your time to build up small habits, you'll be able to maintain your weight loss for life.

Maybe try just logging for a while, until it's second nature. Then look through your diary for something that seems easy to fix - the "low hanging fruit", as it were. Or in my case, the low hanging cheesecake, lol

AJ_G

conniebug76 wrote: »

Well, that answers the question. I'll save change for another day. Thanks!

Lol

malibu927

If you're already assuming you'll fail, why even bother?

I'm the most pessimistic of people, but even I came into this saying "okay, I can do this". 11 months and 54 pounds later, I am doing it. If you give in and eat the Cheetos, tell yourself it's okay and get right back to where you were before. One slipup does not deem you a failure.

970Mikaela1

Start saying I can and I will.

SmartAlec03211988

Well that escalated quickly.

Holly_Roman_Empire

conniebug76 wrote: »

Well, that answers the question. I'll save change for another day. Thanks!

Well that was easy. See ya next time.

aimeemcnally

If you believe you can do it you are half way there

Bellodesiderare

Whether you say you will lose weight or you will fail you are correct. Attitude is half the battle.

Deipneus

conniebug76 wrote: »

I hate that I quit so easily, too. I don't know how to change it, though.

There is no magic elixir for this. You'll do it when you are ready.

RUNNING_AMOK_1958

Fear is your problem. Feel the fear and do it anyway. Seriously, are you going to let a bag of Cheetos have so much power over you that it controls your life?

Cortneyrenee04

That's what I did. Once I got out of my own damn way, I started to succeed. Once I saw changes in my body, my mind and self talk changed too. It's not easy. But it's worth it.

NerdieMcChub

I completely understand where you're coming from, though, I have health issues hindering my goals. This is the reason I've given up in the past. I was weak, to be completely honest.

I finally stopped the self-pity and am getting PROPERLY treated for my medical issues. It's still going to be harder for me than a "normal" person. But now I know this. I accept this.

It's hard. You can do this, but not until you truly want to commit.

iRun_Butterfly

Yes, it's worth it. I had lost and gained many times before this last time. I was convinced this last time was going to be another failure. However, somewhere along the way it just stuck. I don't know the magic formula or what made it different, but if I hadn't tried I would never know. Just keep trying, it'll stick.

deksgrl

You can have some cheetos. Log it. Fit it into your day. Don't set such a low calorie goal that you can't fit in some treats if you want them. Deprivation leads to binges, eventually. It's not a "diet", it is how you learn to live.

Unknown

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NewMeSM75

In my opinion, instead of looking at the whole picture, take it one day at a time. Make the best of that ONE day. If you slip up, don't throw it all away. It happens. Pick yourself back up and keep going. Until I set my mind to it, I couldn't. But once I set my mind, nothing could stop me.

If you give up, you will never get results. Don't be a quitter. At least fight for what you are wanting. I mean that with the sincerest heart...

kamakazeekim

You might want to work with a professional to discuss your self-esteem, relationship with food and body image. For some people there are underlying mental health issues that lead to yo-yo dieting

MostlyWater

Have you discussed surgical options with your doctor? My sister has a similar situation and is planning on getting a lap band this spring or summer.

PRMinx

deksgrl wrote: »

You can have some cheetos. Log it. Fit it into your day. Don't set such a low calorie goal that you can't fit in some treats if you want them. Deprivation leads to binges, eventually. It's not a "diet", it is how you learn to live.

This. Cheetos happen to be one of my weaknesses. I eat them, just sparingly when I can fit it into my day. That's all. It sounds like you are taking a scorched Earth approach to your diet and that is why you struggle.

Also, you have to want it. You need to motivate yourself. If you are ready to quit because of a four posts on a thread, you don't want it.

conniebug76

RUNNING_AMOK_1958 wrote: »

Fear is your problem. Feel the fear and do it anyway. Seriously, are you going to let a bag of Cheetos have so much power over you that it controls your life?

Fear is a huge problem. I know I've tackled harder things and succeeded. Maybe I'm just psyching myself out.

jgnatca

Conniebug, I can totally relate. I put off going on a serious diet for years because I hate futile exercises. I waited until I was in my fifties, had lots of personal time at my disposal, and my health got critical (I was inches away from needing insulin). My doctor referred me to a specialty program. Over the past eighteen months I have lost over eighty pounds and I feel like I have a whole new lease on life. I am off all prescription medications by the way.

http://www.drsharma.ca/obesity-myth-dieting-is-the-best-way-to-control-your-weight.html

conniebug76

Steph38878 wrote: »

In my opinion, instead of looking at the whole picture, take it one day at a time. Make the best of that ONE day. If you slip up, don't throw it all away. It happens. Pick yourself back up and keep going. Until I set my mind to it, I couldn't. But once I set my mind, nothing could stop me.

If you give up, you will never get results. Don't be a quitter. At least fight for what you are wanting. I mean that with the sincerest heart...

Thanks. I do tend to look at the whole picture and get overwhelmed. Maybe just one meal at a time (or even one bite) will make things more manageable for me.

conniebug76

MakePeasNotWar wrote: »

Are you trying to fix everything all in one go and feeling deprived? That would make me eat a bag of cheetos, too. What if you just picked one or two small things to change, then once they were solid habits, take on another. Obviously you will lose more slowly, but if you can truly take your time to build up small habits, you'll be able to maintain your weight loss for life.

Maybe try just logging for a while, until it's second nature. Then look through your diary for something that seems easy to fix - the "low hanging fruit", as it were. Or in my case, the low hanging cheesecake, lol

I do go all or nothing a lot. I know all the "right" things to do, so I do them. Then I get stressed out keeping up with it all: staying in calorie budget, getting enough water, getting enough protein, getting enough veggies, exercising enough times, getting my heart rate up, stretching, strength building, meditating, etc.

I like the idea of just logging for a while. No pressure to change, yet, but it will let me have a good picture of what I'm doing "most" wrongly. Then I can change that.

ValerieMartini2Olives

Either you want it or you don't and clearly you don't because it seems like you're not even intending to try.