Is it still worth doing if you know you will fail?

VeryKatie

It's always worth it because one day, you might just stick to it. You might never know why, but that's kind of how I'm feeling right now.

blupanda12

First, I apologize if I repeat stuff, as I didn't read the thread. I wanted to comment because I went through this cycle for quite a while until this year. I am by no means an expert, but I wanted you to know that you are not alone in this thinking, and you can get past it!

For me, the change stuck this time because I changed my perspective. In the past, I would focus on the "big picture" and it was so overwhelming thinking "I have to lose so much weight, and I have to get better at cardio for my heart health, and I have to figure out a regular exercise program and get my eating under control and...and...and...". It exhausted me just thinking about it all, and I got frustrated with myself that I couldn't do it all at once.

This time, I decided I'd only focus on one step at a time, and while I have long-term goals, my current goal is the only one I work towards. For me, that first goal was "Do not lie to myself". I gave myself permission to be honest, and be okay with things if they weren't perfect. This was a big deal to me, because there is a very large emotional component to my eating. Working through it requires that I be honest with myself, my weaknesses, and my strengths. Once I accepted my own permission to be honest (sounds stupid, I know), I was ready for the next step.

The next step I took was "Log every day, and log honestly". I admit, I wasn't, and still am not, perfect at logging, but logging everything for two months without worrying about the amounts, just accepting that this is what I had eaten that day, helped me to begin to identify the areas I really struggled with.

Only then, did I begin to focus on weight loss. Exercise was the last thing I added to the list, and as I see my "triggers" for emotional eating come and go, I am learning how to handle them without food. It is still very much a work in progress, but each set-back teaches me something new.

Good luck in your efforts, and feel free to friend me if you'd like support on here!

tulips_and_tea

LaurenCheek wrote: »

I have been attempting to lose weight for about 18 years (I'm 24 and became obese in elementary school). Over the years, I have attempted SO many diets. Each one was based primarily around caloric restriction, and I would start to get hungry and binge each time. Usually around a week to three weeks into the effort.

I have struck gold with the low carb (ketogenic) diet. In the past few years (and most especially the past 6 months when I started counting calories carefully and tracking religiously, I have just melted with little effort. (Down about 40 pounds since this July, 95 pound loss total) The cravings and binges have stopped dead in their tracks. (I haven't binged over my daily allotted calories or eaten excess carbs for 12 weeks straight as of right now)

Here's the thing: I am NOT a person with intense willpower. I am actually rather weak-willed. My room is a mess and I can usually be found procrastinating tasks, but keto allows me to near-effortlessly control my calories and food cravings. (The second I eat high carb, the cravings and binges return!)

This leads me to believe that adherence to my plan is based on something that is happening hormonally inside my body in the absence of carbohydrates. (Research suggests: Insulin and ghrelin (fat storing, hunger activators) go down, leptin (satiety hormone) goes up on a diet like mine).

My point is, I had to change not only the AMOUNT of food I was eating, but also the TYPE of food. Calories absolutely count, but if you can't stick to your lower-calorie plan it could potentially be due to the effects of carbs in your diet. It certainly seems to be the case for me.

This is what worked for me, as well. It's definitely not for everyone and it's no magic solution, but it is worth I try. I didn't believe it until I actually did it seriously and it is very much worth it.

tulips_and_tea

conniebug76 wrote: »

Thanks for all the support from those that offered it. I logged all my food yesterday. I'm looking at it as the first day of my new streak!

I'm following some of the advice on here by starting off just by logging what I eat. I'm not changing anything or trying to stay in calorie range. I'm just making a habit of logging everything.

Thank you, again. Some of said things that really made me see things in a different way and made me believe that I really might be able to do this. So I'm giving it a go!

It's very interesting that you say this. If you are so inclined, do a little research and reading by Gretchen Rubin. She writes about the four "Pillars of Habits" one of them being the "Strategy of Monitoring" and here's just a brief sampling:

" Monitoring is an observational strategy. It doesn’t require that I change what I’m doing, only that I know what I’m doing. This is crucial to habit formation, because once I recognize what I’m doing, I may choose to behave differently.

Monitoring has an almost uncanny power. It doesn’t require change, but it often leads to change, because people who keep close track of just about anything tend to do a better job of managing it. Tracking boosts self-control in key categories such as eating, drinking, exercising, working, TV- and internet-use, spending—and just about anything else.
It’s a Secret of Adulthood for habits: “We manage what we monitor.”

Self-measurement brings self-awareness, and self-awareness strengthens our self-control. And on the flip side, anything that makes us lose self-awareness weakens our self-mastery. Alcohol makes it all too easy to place giant bets at a casino; a long, stressful day can lead to a night of online binge-shopping; vacationing with a group of friends can make it easy to blow through a personal budget.
Actual measurement is crucial, because when we guess what we’re doing, we’re often wildly inaccurate. Unsurprisingly, we tend to under-estimate how much we eat and over-estimate how much we exercise."

It's worth looking into, IMHO.

DarbiB

Its all about baby steps! You didn't gain the weight in a month and its not coming off in a month either! Every little bitty positive change adds up to a lifestyle.

Also, here is a Thomas Edison quote for you:

"I have not failed. I've just found 1000 ways that don't work"

0somuchbetter0

Before I read this whole thread, I'm just going to say that I've been working really hard on my head the past few years and that has been the answer for me.

My behavior isn't perfect 100% of the time by any means, but my "setbacks" are fewer and shorter than ever. You said that you "binge for days...wallow in misery for months..." That used to be me, but not any more. I might still binge now and then, but I know now what I'm doing and why (monster fight with husband last weekend -- wow!), and the binge is short...within hours I was hitting the weights and going for a run and feeling better and eating smarter.

You might want to take a look at The Beck Diet Solution -- it's not a gimmick. It's taught me how to think differently about food and my relationship to it. Also, get help. I'm a reasonably intelligent and educated person -- I used to think I didn't need help because I *knew* what to do (donut bad, broccoli good...duh). But I've worked with a therapist and a dietician and they've made all the difference.

Best of luck...stick with it!

ncfitbit

conniebug76 wrote: »

. ... it seriously never occurred to me to be proud of myself for doing the workout or eating the veggies or logging everything this day. I've always been too wrapped up in how I should have worked out longer or harder, or I should not have had cheese on that salad. I figured pride was saved for when I hit goal.

Seriously, that is really eye-opening. It's like I never really listened to what I was saying before.

So, one thing that is FREAKING AWESOME about MFP is that if you have even a handful of supportive friends on here (if you don't already, go find some now!) they will help cheer you on when you exercise or make good food choices, etc. Pretty soon that sound of cheering will get into your head and it will be that much easier to do it for yourself! I serious love my MFP friends for this. It's so easy to be critical of ourselves but when you see other people struggle with similar things, you realize it's not doing them any good to beat themselves up about it.

Best of luck to you in your journey!

softblondechick

I am also a "failure", but I keep at it, you want to know why? Because I think, "geez, I am still fat, even though I try to diet..". Imagine how huge I would be, if I was not even trying..so, that is my motivation to keep at it...

GaleHawkins

Connie it does sound like you are making progress.

In my case I had to realize my time was running out to address my major abuse of carbs. They are like alcohol to me I guess. I either have to be a T-totaler or I abuse in my case.

For the first time in a month I ate some carb stuff for our Christmas dinner but no deserts. Now my stomach is saying, "What in the heck are you doing up there?"

Well it is a year to our next Christmas dinner and I will get over it in a couple days. No one knows what will work for another but we do learn what does and not work for us personally over time.

After a life time of yo yo weight I have finally found a solution that works for me personally. I suffer so much if l let go just a little at only one meal after learning what it was like to eat right. In my case that is a GOOD thing that I can not enjoy what is bad for my health.

Breaking my addiction to Carbs was the hardest thing I have ever done. For others it may be a different eating lifestyle that needs to be stopped.

Not being the one that prepares the food is a plus. I think those who cook for a family that demands food that the cook does not need to be around makes it very hard.

I have had three guys near me around my age die from the side effects of diabetes this fall and others had to go to nursing homes because they were too fat to manage at home. I do not want life to end on a bad note because of my diet.

Keep up your effort and tell yourself what ever you have to tell yourself to make not doing it more painful than managing a good diet for yourself.