Do you do anything that you wonder whether other MFPers do too?

Sued0nim
Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
edited November 9 in Health and Weight Loss
When I'm with other people, I sometimes catch myself eating something almost because I want them to see I eat normally even though I'm on a 'diet'

I log it all - it's all within my calorie defecit so not an intake problem but I'm quite interested, objectively, in that mental attitude (which I may have to work on)

... I don't tend to care what others think of me and yet I seem to want to prove that I eat normally when around others and I'm not on some kind of fad diet

Does anyone do this too? And what else do you catch yourself doing that makes you pause?
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Replies

  • middlehaitch
    middlehaitch Posts: 8,486 Member
    I have spent my whole life saying I was allergic to exercise so I seldom tell anyone that I am in the gym, pool or at a class for 60-90 min 5 days a week.

    I suppose I don't want people to think I have fundamentally changed, or am no fun anymore, or have jumped on some kind of band waggon.

    Interesting question as I have never thought about it before.

    The cat is going to be out of the bag a bit when I proudly announce on FB tomorrow that at the conclusion of my swimming lessons I swam 8 consecutive lengths backstroke and my glutes hurt from all the flutter kicking!

    Cheers, h.
  • PrimalGirl
    PrimalGirl Posts: 148 Member
    I have entire conversations about fitness in my head because no one I know really likes talking about it. Not sure if that counts...
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    Nope, don't care what they think about what or how I'm eating.
    Course this now makes me want to stuff an entire cheesecake down the hole and say "Don't judge me"!
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    Liftng4Lis wrote: »
    Nope, don't care what they think about what or how I'm eating.
    Course this now makes me want to stuff an entire cheesecake down the hole and say "Don't judge me"!

    :D

    so you do or you don't?
  • sheepotato
    sheepotato Posts: 600 Member
    edited December 2014
    I think I know what you mean. It's not like eating healthy is living some secret double life and I should have to hide it. Yet sometimes it does feel that way, I never comment on anything fitness or food related around anyone I know IRL. I answer kindly and honestly all their snarky loaded questions when asked.

    I don't know why people feel like there is a limited amount of success in the world and just because I'm sticking with something (like exercising) I'm somehow lowering their chances of success if they ever wanted to try it.

    It doesn't seem fair that they feel it's okay to judge me or say things to make me feel guilty for the way that they make themselves feel. I did this for me, I don't want to make anyone feel bad. I wish they would give it a try, I would have nothing but support and well wishes for them.

    I've wondered if others go through this too, or if it's a situation that's mostly caused by being related to or working with chronic yo-yo dieters and people who refuse to exercise at all.
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    stephen-fry-offended.jpg
  • logg1e
    logg1e Posts: 1,208 Member
    I often boggle at how many people seem to have unclean, untidy bathrooms.
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    I have no idea how I managed to post that picture on this thread - totally the wrong place

    Sorry
  • logg1e
    logg1e Posts: 1,208 Member
    I thought it was rather apt. And you can't get too much Fry.
  • sheepotato
    sheepotato Posts: 600 Member
    rabbitjb wrote: »
    I have no idea how I managed to post that picture on this thread - totally the wrong place

    Sorry

    It's a good quote and it feels appropriate.

  • Phrick
    Phrick Posts: 2,765 Member
    i get it - my MIL and I went to 5 Guys last night on the way home from the airport - she was all about "oh you won't eat fries now though right?" I felt almost obligated to have fries just to prove I still eat normal food. I just had fewer than I would have in my previous life.
  • My mother did it to me the other day when I ordered a cheeseburger at McDonald's. She asked, "Can you still eat that?" " and then asked "Are you still on track?". Funny thing is, though, that she has never been critical of any of my eating habits. I chalked it up to her just 'thinking out loud' and chose not to get bent out of shape about it. But, I suppose, people generally believe that one has to restrict certain foods to lose weight and they are confused when one eats outside whatever it is that they consider the restricted food to be.
  • Aradia_Silvermoon
    Aradia_Silvermoon Posts: 375 Member
    I have a few quirks that I find myself hiding thanks to last Thanksgiving (2013)! My boyfriend took me to his parent's house and as we were filling plates I made sure to take a bit of everything but also made sure nothing was touching. I hate my foods touching each other....always have and always will. So one of his family made a joke about my plate when my boyfriend piped up "Yeah at home she weighs and measures out all her food!". Before you knew it everyone was asking things like "why do you do that?" or "Do you have an eating disorder?" etc. etc. I wasn't going to eat dessert but after that I ate a big slice of pie to prove I wasn't anorexic!

    I was never so embarrassed (or pissed) in my life! I gave him a piece of my mind after that dinner So now I make sure to plate my food first when no one is in the kitchen so they don't see me weigh or measure. When someone spots the measuring cups I left in the food I simply say "All serving spoons are dirty."

    I still make sure my foods don't touch lol!
  • dopeysmelly
    dopeysmelly Posts: 1,390 Member
    I don't find myself hiding anything, but I'm also aware that people do watch me when I'm eating/drinking in a way they never did before. Either that, or I'm paranoid.

    I've never thought it was OK for others to pass judgment on my eating habits/appearance, and yet some think that it's perfectly OK to do just that now I've lost 70 lbs! Er no.. I still think that's incredibly rude.
  • court_alacarte
    court_alacarte Posts: 219 Member
    edited December 2014
    ugh mothers. i always feel like i get the stink eye from her when i reach for something besides a fruit or vegetable. that judgmental stare that says, "that. that is why you are at the weight you are." so then around her i feel like if i want a snack, it has to be WHAT SHE EATS as a snack; when she sees me in the pantry it's: "oh, if you're hungry, there's vegetables and fruit in the fridge!" her diet is basically: fruits, vegetables, turkey, brown rice and skinny cow fudge pops--nothing more, nothing less.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,744 Member
    I don't care at all what other people think about the way I eat or workout. My husband and kids don't really "get" it because none of them have any health problems, so they all just eat whatever (standard American diet) and don't workout. My husband probably couldn't tell you what I eat on a daily basis, nor do we workout together. I workout for fitness and lifting gains; he occasionally does cardio, as in jogging a couple of miles just so he can keep eating in large quantities.

    IDK. Not sure if any of that even applies here, but what I mean is that I pay no attention to what anyone else thinks of me. All I care about is my health and how I feel.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    I haven't really told anyone outside of my household that I am trying to lose weight this time. I don't post on Facebook about the food I eat or how much I exercised. I don't tell people about this site. I chose a username that people I know IRL are not going to know me by. I'm not going to post pictures of myself.
    I guess I feel like this process is for me. I don't want input or comments along the way even if they are positive compliments. (Not offended but uncomfortable) At some point it will be really obvious that I have lost weight and I'm not really looking foward to people noticing, commenting or asking questions.
  • court_alacarte
    court_alacarte Posts: 219 Member
    I have a few quirks that I find myself hiding thanks to last Thanksgiving (2013)! My boyfriend took me to his parent's house and as we were filling plates I made sure to take a bit of everything but also made sure nothing was touching. I hate my foods touching each other....always have and always will. So one of his family made a joke about my plate when my boyfriend piped up "Yeah at home she weighs and measures out all her food!". Before you knew it everyone was asking things like "why do you do that?" or "Do you have an eating disorder?" etc. etc. I wasn't going to eat dessert but after that I ate a big slice of pie to prove I wasn't anorexic!

    I was never so embarrassed (or pissed) in my life! I gave him a piece of my mind after that dinner So now I make sure to plate my food first when no one is in the kitchen so they don't see me weigh or measure. When someone spots the measuring cups I left in the food I simply say "All serving spoons are dirty."

    I still make sure my foods don't touch lol!

    seriously, these people asked you that? really? WHO ASKS THAT?! what do they expect? "why yes, yes i DO have an eating disorder. let me tell you alllll about it!"

    i understand if people are truly interested and intrigued with your weight loss efforts and process of doing so... i believe like any sensitive topic such as religion or politics (yes, i am definitely classifying diet up there), they can be discussed in a mature manner. however it can easily get out of hand as comments can easily come off as back-handed and offensive with some people.
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    rabbitjb wrote: »
    Liftng4Lis wrote: »
    Nope, don't care what they think about what or how I'm eating.
    Course this now makes me want to stuff an entire cheesecake down the hole and say "Don't judge me"!

    :D

    so you do or you don't?

    I don't, but any chance I have to be annoying! :wink:
  • segacs
    segacs Posts: 4,599 Member
    edited December 2014
    Other than MFP people and a couple of close friends, I haven't made a point of telling anyone I'm losing weight either. Partly because I don't want to invite them to comment -- really, I don't need their 'advice' and it's none of their business how much I weigh or what I eat -- and also partly because I really don't want to be one of those people -- the type who are always talking about their food and exercise habits and going on and on about it. We all know those people. None of us wants to be that person.

    I've got a bit of a reputation as a fan of sweets, a chocoholic, someone who will eat dessert with gusto. It's something I probably ingrained a bit too much as part of my identity. It's funny -- it's been easier to give up the chocolate than it has been to give up the identity part of that. I don't really want to let go of it, oddly enough.

    Most people are fairly self-centered anyway, and are simply not that observant. I'm guessing most people won't notice when I drop the weight. And that's okay. It just means they didn't notice how fat I was either.
  • Aradia_Silvermoon
    Aradia_Silvermoon Posts: 375 Member
    c4rtr4t wrote: »
    seriously, these people asked you that? really? WHO ASKS THAT?! what do they expect? "why yes, yes i DO have an eating disorder. let me tell you alllll about it!"

    i understand if people are truly interested and intrigued with your weight loss efforts and process of doing so... i believe like any sensitive topic such as religion or politics (yes, i am definitely classifying diet up there), they can be discussed in a mature manner. however it can easily get out of hand as comments can easily come off as back-handed and offensive with some people.

    Yup I was speechless as well lol! It was his aunt who loves drama so everyone else ignored her but the rest of evening was just as uncomfortable. His mother wants grandkids (she has step grandkids but she wants "real grandkids") and my bf raised his late wife's kids and she couldn't have more due to cervical cancer. My boyfriends sister has PCOS and can't conceive. So she thought it was also OK to ask about my reproductive health and about my medical history! WTH people? All I said was "Yes I can have kids if you need proof look right next to me (where my daughter sat"

    My boyfriend got them to stop eventually but it was hands down the most awkward dinner I have EVER attended!

  • court_alacarte
    court_alacarte Posts: 219 Member
    c4rtr4t wrote: »
    seriously, these people asked you that? really? WHO ASKS THAT?! what do they expect? "why yes, yes i DO have an eating disorder. let me tell you alllll about it!"

    i understand if people are truly interested and intrigued with your weight loss efforts and process of doing so... i believe like any sensitive topic such as religion or politics (yes, i am definitely classifying diet up there), they can be discussed in a mature manner. however it can easily get out of hand as comments can easily come off as back-handed and offensive with some people.

    Yup I was speechless as well lol! It was his aunt who loves drama so everyone else ignored her but the rest of evening was just as uncomfortable. His mother wants grandkids (she has step grandkids but she wants "real grandkids") and my bf raised his late wife's kids and she couldn't have more due to cervical cancer. My boyfriends sister has PCOS and can't conceive. So she thought it was also OK to ask about my reproductive health and about my medical history! WTH people? All I said was "Yes I can have kids if you need proof look right next to me (where my daughter sat"

    My boyfriend got them to stop eventually but it was hands down the most awkward dinner I have EVER attended!

    good luck in that family, my good friend. i wish you all the strength and patience in the world LOL
  • melimomTARDIS
    melimomTARDIS Posts: 1,941 Member
    I have gotten told that "better not get all anorexic now" and that because I preplan my meals I am "not even human!"

    Now that I am at maintenance I hear a lot of *kitten* about that too.

    Haters gonna hate.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    I don't eat what most people would consider "normally." I'm totally fine with being recognized as the office health and fitness nut.

    That's not to say that I don't eat a slice of pizza now and then...but people are far more accustomed to seeing my face buried in a large garden salad piled high with some sort of lean protein source or eating my massive serving of scrambled eggs and oats in the morning.
  • melimomTARDIS
    melimomTARDIS Posts: 1,941 Member
    c4rtr4t wrote: »
    ugh mothers. i always feel like i get the stink eye from her when i reach for something besides a fruit or vegetable. that judgmental stare that says, "that. that is why you are at the weight you are." so then around her i feel like if i want a snack, it has to be WHAT SHE EATS as a snack; when she sees me in the pantry it's: "oh, if you're hungry, there's vegetables and fruit in the fridge!" her diet is basically: fruits, vegetables, turkey, brown rice and skinny cow fudge pops--nothing more, nothing less.

    LOL- my mom is a tiny woman, who is slightly overweight- her diet consists of- cookies, half plates of dinner (she never eats all of anything), cereal with soy milk, rotisserie chicken (breasts only) from the grocery store, bagels, butter, and whole grain bread. Oh, and coffee with half n' half and diet coke. Sometimes a salad.

    No more, no less.

  • melimomTARDIS
    melimomTARDIS Posts: 1,941 Member
    Of course she could write something similar about me- all my daughter eats is potatoes, beans, and rice. And the cheapest fruit and vegetables at the damn store. Also candy. and cheap wine.
  • esjones12
    esjones12 Posts: 1,363 Member
    After 2.5 years I have thankfully trained my family (still live with the rents and sister) that I occasionally eat greasy pizza and a whole bottle of wine and that they shouldn't judge or say anything about it. They know it's the day in and out of measuring food and hitting the gym that has gotten me to where I am. I think my mom and sister are jealous though and it makes it awkward at times :-/

    It sometimes irritates me a bit when people at work or friends make comments. Like mind your own businesses. So what if I eat a piece of cake....I'm hitting the gym for two hours tonight. I've been getting a lot better about not caring about what anyone thinks about anything I do though. I think it's the age + self confidence from weight loss thing kicking in ;)
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
    I have also kept everything MFP-related off of Facebook and do not discuss it with my friends. I don't know why - maybe it's because I have so many friends who are always posting their runs and their weights and their diets and I am compelled to be different. And come here to post my runs and my weights and my diets :)
  • dunnodunno
    dunnodunno Posts: 2,290 Member
    When I hear people go on & on about eating something fattening or saying how a certain food is bad for you I want to scream that you can eat what you want in moderation (with the exception of medical reasons) & if you're in a deficit you'll lose weight.
  • AliceDark
    AliceDark Posts: 3,886 Member
    I'm also known as the health-and-fitness person in my office, which is fine, except that my coworkers feel the need to tell me about whatever whackadoodle diet they're on this week. And because I really don't want to talk even more about their eating habits, I just kind of smile and nod, and try to act like they don't sound like crazy people.

    You're eating 1200 calories and "only eating a little bit of carb at dinner" (exact quote, btw), and you're eating nothing but tuna and Atkins bars until your wedding next month? Sounds completely reasonable, ladies! Let's all go back to our desks now, so I can think about ice cream in peace.
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