I don't want to die

cniklew

I'm almost 34 and I have a husband and two very cool kids who love me to bits. Recently, I've begun to realize I have a better chance of leaving them early due to my weight than sticking around to see my future grandchildren grow up. This thought terrifies me.

My children love me so much and I ask myself why I can't do what I need to do for them and for me. I'm in a scary place with my weight and I'm not sure how to lose weight and get healthy. I honestly have no clue how or where to begin.

Money is tight so I don't think I'll join a gym. I don't like eating a lot of stuff that I'm sure is considered healthy and with a family of four, I have no clue how to budget a healthy grocery list while feeding four and making sure they're not all begging to be fed an hour after a meal.

I'm very heavy so exercise usually leaves me feeling as if I can't breathe at all and sometimes I hurt myself (knees, ankles, back) and then I can't work out anymore anyway so it's a waste.

I work full-time and am out of the house from 7 am to 6 pm. Either I spend time with family, friends, take time for myself, or sleep. There's no time for much else.

Am I doomed to sit around and gain more weight. Is this it for me? I seem to be in a rut and I'm not sure how to escape it. The oddest thing is that my daughter is slim and athletic. I am scared she'll somehow start taking after me eventually, though. I've always been overweight, but I was never really unhealthy until after I had my second child nearly four years ago.

Now I'm out of breath all the time just from walking down the block or up a flight of stairs. I can't fit in regular seats all the time anymore. I don't know what happened.

Anyway, that's me. I want help and I want to change things, but I'm not sure how. People have said, "You just do it." but I don't know what that means. I really mean it when I say I'm clueless. I had a friend who pointed me in this direction, though, so I'm hoping to get involved and learn something new that can really help me.

I used to worry about fitting into clothes. Now my concern has moved to how to save my life. I'm young and I don't want this amazing journey to be closer to over if it's in my power to turn things around.

xonophone

Wow, that is quite a story, thank you for sharing it with us! And you should give yourself a huge pat on the back for taking this courageous step towards taking control of you life and health. You will get lots of great advice and inspiration from many people who have similar stories to yours. Let me first assure you that healthy food can in fact be very filling, and won't leave you hungry in an hour. A diet rich in protein, vegetables and whole grains will keep you full and if you eat smaller amounts of food at more frequent intervals you will not feel ravenous at mealtime. But I suggest you start by simply counting the number of calories you are already eating during the day. Then, you will learn how to cut down on your portion sizes so that you can still eat the foods you love, just in controlled portions. You MUST weigh/measure everything, for this to work. And it does work. As ofr exercise, don't sweat it! (no pun intended :laugh: ) Start by just taking an after dinner walk around the nieghborhood with your family. Eventually you will find some type of exercise that suits you, but don't worry about trying to get there all at once, start by making small changes first. There are hundreds of sucess stories, in fact you should take a look through them when you have a chance - I guarantee you will become a little more encouraged that you have the power to do this! Good luck!

anna_b1

"Just do it" is easier said than done. I get that.

I think dying and leaving your family early isn't an option. So just put it out of your mind.

Focus on small steps that will get you moving. It doesn't need to be strenuous excercise at first if that hurts. Spend time with your family playing...or taking a walk.

Insofar as food is concerned, there are so many options that are tasty and not cardboard-y. It doesn't have to be grilled or boiled chicken. Use the recipes on here or visit other sites (just google low-fat, low-calorie recipes). Look for ones that have reviews by "real" people so that you can gauge how people who made the recipe felt about it afterwards.

Most of all, don't give up. We're here to support each other. It's always easier giving others advice, but the road to better health doesn't have to be lonely or impossible.

msciccone1

I can totally understand where you are coming from and not knowing where to start or what to do. I waited for 10 years before I started doing something and now I don't want to stop. You have to get somewhere deep in your heart, brain and soul and decide what you want for your life. I have 2 toddlers now and it seemed very selfish of me to continue the horrible overweight lifestyle I was leading. What I started doing was walking first, then I tried to give myself a very hard challenge and saw results 3 months later. The point is never letting up when you don't see 20 lbs. come off in a week because clearly we all want to see biggest loser numbers and its just not reality when we are only working out 1 or 2 hours a day. I see that you say you want to be a part of your kids' lives in the future well then do something to secure that! Start by walking an hour every day and have them come with you. You will still get winded at first but then you will be getting better and better as your body gets used to the exercise; baby steps. You can't rush yourself and the weight will follow. Just set a plan and stick to it. You CAN do it if you want to :flowerforyou:

ShastaAngel

Where to start.... you have the perfect motivation, your kids, and eventually grandkids. I can relate to the back and knee problems. My doctor told me that every pound overweight a person is puts 10 pounds of pressure on their spine... that's a lot of pressure!!!

When grocery shopping, I try to stick to the perimeter of the store, making forays into the frozen food section for frozen veggies for me, and frozen chicken nuggets and other such goodies for my teen age son. I buy a loaf of whole wheat bread for me, and the white crappy stuff my son likes for him LOL

When I make dinner, I make the stuff hubby and son like, and then I make a separate meal for myself. Tonight it was tilapia with rotel cooked on it and some veggies... my dinner was only 150 calories and I feel satisfied!

For excercise, which I understand is hard for you right now, try a short walk during you lunch break at work, and maybe another little walk after dinner... you can build that up as you start feeling better.

You can do this, I have faith in you! And if you need a friend, I am more than happy to be there for you. I am a terrific cheerleader! I will send you a friend request hun.


Valerie

HealthyChanges2010

Hi,
Welcome to MFP, always great to see new folks wanting to change their lives and get healthier:flowerforyou:
You're very beautiful, I peeked at your photo

Well you've definitely come to the right place to relearn how eat in healthier ways. It all seems overwhelming at first when starting out making huge changes in our lives. Sometimes the best way is baby steps. Tracking your food, yes every bite so you see it down on paper so to speak, it's actually very helpful. Another thought is portion control, simply eat a bit less than you did yesterday etc.

You sound very overwhelmed and very sad but you don't have to do it all today:happy: . You are here, and that in itself proves you do want to live and do want to have a healthy life.

PM me if you need any help, I'd be more than happy to help in any way I can. Lots of very friendly members around here that will help you get started on the journey, just reading the boards helps ALOT. It's true, the best way to start is simply to begin. One change at a time. Chose one thing and do that change for a week, then chose another etc.

Glad you're here :flowerforyou:
Becca

Thinwithin2010

Oh sweetheart you have come to the right place. This site is so informative and we are all here for you!! Spend some time going thru blogs ,message boards and look and try to get some info.. If you are able, go to your doctor and tell him you need help!! Thats what I did when I was at my ropes end and he helped me start. Your town might even have a nutrition class at your local hospital. Look into it.. The biggest step was the letter you wrote! Right from the heart and you ARE ready.. Find out your calorie's and log in your food,if you can, walk to the end of you block tomorrow after work. Then back. Then the next night go down 1 more house and back and each night go 1 house further.. You will be surprised at how much you can do in a few weeks time. I don't know if you live in a neighborhood but use that as an example.. Look on line for some simple exercises you can do from a chair. If you dont have weights use a couple soup or vegie cans, or a couple water bottles..All of us when we started couldnt breath.. Oh believe me! lol You will be fine as we are all here. Ask to be friends with people and I already asked you to be mine.. I'm Kathy and am looking for a weight loss of 149 pounds and have lost 19 already.. Keep in touch and talk soon!! :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: alot of flowers for you!!!

RhondaCrombie

I actually began my journey for that very reason: I knew my health was in terrible shape (my body, too!), and I wanted to be healthy for my kids. Since I have been going at this for a while now, I realize that I want THEM to understand how important eating well and exercise are. I want THEM to see ME doing these things so that they will probably accept the habits as well.

Myfitnesspal is a GREAT place to learn new food ideas and meet people who are struggling just like you are. If you get breathless after one flight of stairs, that's fine. Walk them until you can add a few more steps...and then a few more...and then do it more regularly. Walk around your block with your kids. Walk them to a park if there is one nearby. You don't HAVE to join a gym to lose weight. Walking regularly and increasing your increments is one of THE best exercises you can do. And it is FREEEE!

Good luck on your journey! :flowerforyou: You are doing the BEST thing ever--beginning the process of becoming a healthier, more active you!

jamie11k

I'm so happy you came to MFP. What a great day to start! You are not alone, and you can do it!

I grew up taking walks with my parents and dogs EVERY DAY. We knew everyone on our mile-long route through the neighborhood, and they knew us. Think about it.. what better way to spend time with your family and teach them to be active? When I became a teenager and 'walking' was uncool, I rollerbladed or biked.

Give it a try, and don't let the weight of the world sit on your shoulders. You will start to feel better once you realize that all it takes it that first little step.

{{{HUG}}}

cynditoney

You can do this. Remember, small steps. A little walk is better than no walk. What about the kids, would they like to go for a walk after dinner? Including the family allows for a lot of quality time. As for budgeting for a family of four, what is your grocery bill like now? Can you replace some of the less healthy choices with fresh fruit or vegetables? A good place to shop for fresh fruit and vegetables is to find a local farmers market- another great little family trip. If you need a friend, accept my friend request- I will be glad to help any way I can and cheer you on!!

cniklew

Thanks for the lovely responses and compliments. I really hadn't thought much about trying little things first. I think it's all so overwhelming and figuring out where I am right now to get a clear picture of where my problems lie has also not been something I thought of before.

It's nice to know I'm not the only one. I sometimes feel like everyone can lose weight quick and easy except me.

I think the children would like taking walks with me. I suppose I thought I had to do everything alone. And eating different meals than the rest of my family also didn't occur to me.

I have accepted the friend requests and I really appreciate the encouragement. I'll start checking out some of the success stories and get started with measuring what I'm taking in now. It's pretty bad because of the things I tend to eat and drink on a regular basis, but I know I have to recognize that before I can change it.

I'd be lying if I didn't say I was scared of a lot of things, but failure is probably the biggest fear right now. Either way, I suppose there's no time like the present to start a new way of doing things. Thanks again!

lisawest

Most of the ideas I have for you have already been said, but they bear repeating!:happy: When I started my journey last August, hubby and I started by controlling our portions. We pulled out the measuring cups and spoons, we asked for a food scale for my birthday, we were fanatical about measuring everything that went on our plates or in our mouths. I dropped quite a bit of weight just by realizing that I was eating to keep up with hubby, and I'm not supposed to be his size. (This was a toughy for me, and I still fight with my inner-voice that says, "Well, if he can have a bed time snack, so can you! Who cares if you're already over for the day.") We kept eating all the stuff we had been eating (chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, spaghetti, Hamburger Helper, etc etc etc), we just stopped eating more than one serving. At first we were always still hungry afterwards. Then we discovered that veggies helped fill us up without adding too many calories to our day. I go for celery, carrots, tomatoes, lettuces, etc. I've been known to chop some of the aforementioned veggies up and put then in the sauce, (shhhh, don't tell my husband!:laugh: ) to help make it more filling, also.

Don't try to change everything in one day! Once I discovered that exercising meant I could eat more, I decided to exercise. Well, I'm busy, and I don't really like exercising (gyms, weights, machines, etc = ICK in my book ). Soooo, I started walking. At first it was just a few blocks each night with the family. Now my kids (3 and 5) and I walk at LEAST 2 miles a day. (Remember, this is NINE months later, work up to it)

A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. You've made the first and joined MFP. The second step is to understand what you've BEEN eating, and adjust that. I recommend starting with portion control, and then branch out to healthier foods from there. Go for a walk around your block every night for a week. Then go around 2 blocks for a week or two. Add a block every couple weeks. You'll be amazed at how quick the distance adds up! Don't try to start out like an olympic athlete, start with one step, and then add another.

I am more than happy to answer any questions you have, share my own experience, etc. Just send me a message asking anything you want to know!

I am here because my mom never got to meet her grandchildren due to untimely death that was an indirect result of being severely overweight. I was headed down the same path, and it scared me. My aunt told my sister about this site, who told me, which caused me to ask my aunt about it. It is a great site.

It sounds like you have been on the same path I was on. It's never too late to turn around and go back!

How's this for a long rambling post? I hope it helps you, and PLEASE let me know if you have questions!:flowerforyou: Here's to making better choices!:drinker:

DwightJenkins

Well, everyone has beat me to the good advice, so I'll just say welcome, and we're glad you're here! This really is a great site, and the people here will help. You don't have to feel alone.

reneelee

Wow, that is quite a story, thank you for sharing it with us! And you should give yourself a huge pat on the back for taking this courageous step towards taking control of you life and health. You will get lots of great advice and inspiration from many people who have similar stories to yours. Let me first assure you that healthy food can in fact be very filling, and won't leave you hungry in an hour. A diet rich in protein, vegetables and whole grains will keep you full and if you eat smaller amounts of food at more frequent intervals you will not feel ravenous at mealtime. But I suggest you start by simply counting the number of calories you are already eating during the day. Then, you will learn how to cut down on your portion sizes so that you can still eat the foods you love, just in controlled portions. You MUST weigh/measure everything, for this to work. And it does work. As ofr exercise, don't sweat it! (no pun intended :laugh: ) Start by just taking an after dinner walk around the nieghborhood with your family. Eventually you will find some type of exercise that suits you, but don't worry about trying to get there all at once, start by making small changes first. There are hundreds of sucess stories, in fact you should take a look through them when you have a chance - I guarantee you will become a little more encouraged that you have the power to do this! Good luck!

reneelee

You gave GREAT advice !

koreansponge

I think its great that you want to be healthier for your children instead of sitting back and accepting it as an inevitability as some people do. I have two good tips for helping you.

1.) Get a workout buddy. Find someone who can workout with you, especially when you move to workouts other than walking. A friend working out with you helps keep you motivated.

2.) I've found that a good way to work out is dancing. I ordered a Zumba DVD to help me work out. It's a Latin dance DVD and most of the dances on the beginning DVD are simple enough that you get a good workout and get sweating without being exhausting (I'm just starting out too). Maybe something like that would be a good workout for you.

Hope that helped. Good luck!

MzMolly

Hey hun,
We are all in the same boat. This is a wonderful website and I suggest you put it to good use! The support you will find here is wonderful and important as well as the food tracking and other tools it offers.
I was in the very same position when I started my LIFE STYLE CHANGE. I refuse to call it a diet because I know this is something I will need to do the rest of my life. I was about 130 pounds over weight and my health was really going down hill. I started by going to the doctor and got a physical. My lab work showed several things that needed treating, thyroid, cholesteral and liver problems. I also had eaten my way to high blood pressure. I got my wake-up call when I went to see my dr. and he told me I had Fatty Liver Disease on top of the other issues I just mentioned. I was at a point where I either needed to make some SERIOUS changes NOW or I was headed for a heart attact, stroke or liver failure SOON!
I started by seeing a dietician, and at 45 I learded a few things I am ashamed to shay. She put me on a 1500 calories a day, has me keeping my carbs under 150 g a day and told me to AVOID SATURATED FATS!! Reduce them down to as close to zero as possible.
I understand the money aspect and the family aspect but as far as your family goes they need good nutrion too and you need to teach them how to eat right and set a good example. Eating healthy is actually more filling then eating junk! READ ALL lables, journal EVERYTHING you eat and BE POSITIVE!! You have made the biggest step, you got honest with yourself! That is hard to do now it is time to act and believe in yourself. YOU CAN DO THIS!!
Walking is free and it would be a great thing for your entire family!!
I undersatand where you are and how you are feeling. Take advantage of the people on MFP, they are a great support and reach out to other friends and family and ask them for support and encouragement as well! People want to help!!
Good luck and God bless you,
Molly

lds25

Hey there girl! I am so happy that you are here because it means that you have decided to change!!! For that please celebrate!!! I am also starting to lose weight and to change me. Mini changes are key in weight loss, increase in water, change where you used to eat when eating out, increase in movement, increase in sleep. Life is all about change and we are only in charge of ourselves. I wish you all the best!

lisalynn35

I understand completely and if you read my profile I think you'll understand that I do mean "completely". I just don't want to die either. The others are right, start small, baby steps are best at first. I started with a walk around the block with my 2 year old (so, sloooow pace). As far as gyms go, check out your local Rec. Center. We joined ours for about a 3rd of the price of a regular gym and they have all the same equipment and a pool and classes to take and great hours. I know what you mean about not wanting to take time away from your family but if you make exercise play time the kids can get involved too. My son and I do jumping jacks twice a week, 2 sets of 10, and once a week dance around the family room for a half hour, and baby that's aerobics!

Remember, slow and steady wins the race and that we are here for you!

emmaldownie

I cant say anymore than what has already been said.

Welcome to MFP and the start of the rest of your life.

Good luck, we're all here and rooting for you :drinker: :bigsmile: :flowerforyou:

tjptaylor

I think everyone has given great advice. My initial motivation 6 years ago was my daughter - I did not want her raised in a house where her mom was always dieting and whose weight was always up and down. I focused on making our house healthy - very limited sweets, lots of fruits and veggies, whole grains. This no only helped me stick to a plan and get my weight under control, its set a healthy enviroment for her. Also, I focused on walking as much as I could with her.

One thing I'm not sure if it was mentioned - can you talk to your DR? It may be worth seaking medical advice and possibly meeting with a nutritionist if your insurance would cover that.

Good luck!

dmags

you are already getting such great advice. I thought I would add my 2 cents. I did not exercise at all my first month on here. The thought of changing my food and routine were just too much for me at the time. After a month or so, I decided to buy some of the Biggest Loser DVD's. I am also not in the position to join a gym. Both financially and just a matter of time. Getting away from my 2 kids is hard enough 1 a week, never mind more than that! I figured that a 9 dollar DVD from Walmart was about the same as one guest pass to a gym, so why not. I love the DVD's. I particulary like the shred because it is only 20 minutes long and that is all I can muster on some days after the boys are in bed.

Don't let yourself get overwhelmed... if you do slip, it really is no big deal. It happens to all of us. Just get right back. No need to wait for tomorrow either. Another big downfall for me.... "I screwed up, so will start again tomorrw" Let me tell you, I can do a lot of damage in 10 hours!

I am proud of you. You can do it. And on the days that you don't think that you can, you have a lot of support here!

Welcome!

Cynduck

Welcome!

I'm right there with you. I would love to get to know you and support each other through this journey so feel free to add me if you would like.

You can do this. Don't focus on the big journey, just one step at a time, one choice at a time. Start making little changes. Start walking a little more every day, add something. The hardest part for me is always just doing it that first time. Once I get up and do it, the next time is easier.

I understand the challenges and the fear of failure. I posted a blog about that not long ago. I have succeeded in everything in my life except my weight loss. I keep getting bigger and bigger and am also afraid I am going to die if I don't get ahold of this now. I was watching Jillian Michaels new show called Losing It and she said something that really hit me hard. She asked the contestant why she was choosing failure when success is an option. I have never thought of it like that before. We have 2 choices, we can choose to fail or we can choose to do this. I am choosing success this time - will you join me?

tabbydog

You can start by walking 10 minutes at lunch, and 10 minutes with your family after dinner. Slowly increast those times until you can do 20 mintes or half hour each time. Buy some 3 pound hand weights and while you are watching TV at night do biceps curls and triceps extensions, shoulder raises etc. That in itself won't burn a lot of calories, but building muscle increases your metabolism, and once you lose the fat you will have pretty, toned muscles to see!

Eat lots of fruits and veggies. I always buy what ever is on sale for veggies. Apples, grapes, bananas, oranges, melons, kiwis, berries etc... Frozen veggies are just as nutritious as fresh (sometimes more so) are usually cheaper, and all you have to do to prepare them is cut open the bag and steam them! I buy store brands. A few cents cheaper than the name brands usually.

I buy generic brown rice in a 3 pound bag for about $2. It lasts a week! Mix in beans and veggies for a healthy lunch. Sometimes I will saute onions, mushrooms, peppers, whatever in a little evoo and mix it with the rice to spice it up a little.

Good luck on your journey. This place is awesome, with lots of nice people to ask advice of. Take care!:flowerforyou:

sdwelk11

It seems that you are taking the first step, which to me, is the most import step. You have come to the realization that you need to live a healthier lifestyle. You should talk to your Doctor first before starting any weight loss program.
For me, it was January of this year when one of my Best friends that I work with asked me to go weigh (we work in a hospital) with her because she started using a phone app called MY FITNESS PAL and needed to log a starting weight. Well, just for the heck of it I weighed myself too and when I saw what the scale read I didn't know if I was going to faint or cry! I couldn't believe how much I weighed and knew right then and there that if I didn't do something that day then I wouldn't live to see myself turn 40. I have a long ways to go and I, like you, wasn't really a fan of "healthy" foods but I just started out with cutting sugar out of my diet and really only focused on that in the beginning. I have a really long ways to go because I need to lose over 150lbs but I am learning to like the "healthy foods" and it is getting easier for me. I have lost 33lbs so far and exercise is important but don't overdo it either. You know what your limitations are and you can do this. I feel like we always say that we need to lose weight and get healthier and I truly believe that there is this one moment in our lives that comes along and we know that at that moment it is time to make the change. We no longer say that we need to lose weight, you just start doing it!

There is plenty of support around here. Don't get me wrong I was really good in the begining and then I slacked off for a few weeks but I am back on the band wagon and it feels good! If you are anything like me, change can be hard, so pick one thing to focus on. Like how I focused on sugar in the beginning. It was something that I loved but I taught myself to back off of the sugar and now if I want something sweet its usually carrot sticks or fruit. I do treat myself to sugar free candy sometimes but mostly fruits and sweeter tasting veggies.

Good luck and I know you are on the right track to making a lifestyle change. This isn't dieting! This is changing your lifestyle! Read the message boards to because there is a wealth of information on here.

amy1612

I really hope she wouldnt mind me posting this, but this woman is an absolute hero for busy people
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/imagymrat
Shes bringing up six kids,working full time and manages ti find time for health. Yeah,she's superfit,but no-one gets there without hard work. You can do it.
My mum works full time, and has lost in excess of 100lbs through sheer determination . You can do anything as long as you beleive it. If you need any advice on budget shopping PM me,I dont have a family,but I shopped for one when my mum broke her back, and there are a few key things which always come in handy.

Rhonnie

I have always ate what I wanted when I wanted it, I ate more chocolate in a day then most people do in week, I didn't cook and always ate out - so I know what it means to change how you live! Luckily I've always been athletic so while I don't go to the gym or anything I can play sports. That is probably what has kept me from being way heavier then I am.

I started with little things... switching from 2% milk to 1% (CAN NOT do non-fat *cringe*). I never order fries (maybe steal 2-3 from someone else if they do). I never order milk shakes (again, maybe steal a sip if someone else does). I got mayo that is made with olive oil instead of the regular stuff. I reduced any sugar I put on things by one spoonful. I get 4% fat hamburger. I get whole wheat pasta (you might have to experiment a little... some taste and have the same texture as 'normal' pasta, but others you can taste a bit of a different... but none of it that I've tried is 'bad'), I get 'smooth white whole wheat' bread. I get frozen non-fat yogurt instead of ice-cream (again, you might have to try a few brands before finding the one you like... I've found Dryers to be the most ice-cream like).

With those changes alone you will at the very least stop 'gaining' weight, and very likely start losing. And all of these are changes (other then the fries and shakes) that you can make for the whole family so you don't have to make 'separate meals' or anything. It also gives you a good base to start making other, perhaps more major changes.

As for exercising, find a blog of a person that has difficulty exercising and see how they do it (http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/chandnikhondji is one that comes to mind). There are many options that are low impact, from swimming, to elliptical machines, to even wheel chair workouts. Even getting a work-out ball and sitting on it while watching TV or on the computer is a start. It doesn't have to cost anything either... during commercials you can do sets of arm exercising lifting cans or water bottles. You may not find something you 'love' with these kind of work outs, but it's a start and before you know it you'll have more options available to you and you will find something you love to do.

You can do it!!!

caheglar

Oh my you made me want to cry. I know how hard and more to the point scare to start something new. I also know that the only person you can do this for is you. You have to want it more than you fear it. You go online to find a healty foods shopping list. You also dont have to eat the same stuff you family does. I say this because I three boys on of which is 2 so I know that I have to stay here with him as long as I can. I also have an son with autism and I dont trust anyone to raise him but me. I have faith that you will see why you want to do this.

Good Luck

dj_stevie_c

You CAN do it.

I've always thought A lot of it is mental, a lot of it will be training your mind to do the right thing. That food you hate? Sometimes if you tell yourself you like something it will be so, sounds odd but it is true. You can force yourself to like things. It gets easier. If something healthy is in front of me I tell myself that it's healthy rather than thinking "I'm not going to lie this"

At lot of why we get out of shape is that we're good at making excuses for ourselves and taking the easy option, I know, I've done it most of my life. I have to lose a similar amount of weight to yourself, and I'm 36 so I am near your age. I also suffer with back/neck/knee problems. But you'll be amazed at how quickly your body can adapt to whatever you throw at it if you apply yourself. The fight is mostly mental. If you can train you brain to think healthy then you can get healthy.

I kept telling myself that I was depressed, things weren't great in my life and I had nothing going for me. 2 Months later I feel fit, I've lost 18lbs and from struggling to climb steps I can now do 60mins straight of Cardio, eat well and my mindset has completely changed, if I face something that I think might be bad, I tell myself no, out loud if I have to. I'm training my brain.

This sounds simple, but you know and I know it isn't. Willpower is always there ready to help us or trip us up. You can draw willpower from your kids, they must be so important to you that you want to be better for them, want to play games with them, maybe plan small trips, go feed the ducks at the local park or something. If you take the bus get off a stop early, if you take the car park 3 streets away from your destination. Start with small things, build up, as you build up you'll get more energy and that will make you want to take things earlier. The more time you spend hanging out with your kids and doing things with them the better you will feel.

If something knocks you down, don't fall, get back up and face whatever hit you. Everyone slips from time to time, what we do after those slips is what makes the difference, not what caused that slip or what that slip was.

This turned into a big waffle, but just remember you're not alone, there are lots of people out here in the same situation as you, the only difference between success and failure is making sure your head is in the right place. And honestly, being on here really helps as there are so many positive stories and ideas floating around, you've started well, you're arming yourself with knowledge and a support system

Welcome to the club

sandara

If you decide to look for some beginner workout DVD's check out www.walkathome.com just to get an idea. These are workouts you can do at home in front of your TV and they come in all different lengths. From 1 mile to 5 with all kinds of variations and most (not all) are totally low-impact. I started out with one mile a day and it took 15 - 20 minutes. I am not very coordinated and was totally out of shape when I started. These are the only workouts I've used so far. If you decide you want to try them don't order off the website though, you can get them cheaper at most Wal-marts, Targets, and Best Buys. And even places like amazon may be less expensive. I've even talked to people that rent them from netflix. Your kids might like doing them too when you can't make it outdoors. I know there is a family walk DVD but I've never found it.

Welcome to MFP! It's a great place to be

Natalie43

welcome to MFP you will find all the help and support you need right here. it's all about baby steps so try not to worry about the big stuff, small changes can make huge differences. just getting out of lifts one floor early or getting of the bus one stop short helps. when the sugar cravings cant be ignored any longer, chew gum. this is an amazing site and motivates me every day, good luck on your progress.