First Apartment with boyfriend - any advice?

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  • Rivers2k
    Rivers2k Posts: 380 Member
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    You are nervous because you are entering into a terrible sin. Sin means it is bad.

    You might be struck with lightning, but I don't know if God still does that.

    "If he likes it, then he better put a ring on it." -- Beyonce.

    Agreed! check out statistics on Divorce rates among people who live together first. They are much higher. If he doesnt care enough to marry you then you are setting you up for heart break.
  • Ali_TSO
    Ali_TSO Posts: 1,172 Member
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    Steer clear of the midwest. They get a little uptight when black women start stealing all their white men.

    Haha, the same way I feel on the reverse side, living in Atlanta. :) lol
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
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    Whatever you do, do not fart, burp, poop, or pee with him in the apartment. He WILL stop loving you.
  • thesupremeforce
    thesupremeforce Posts: 1,206 Member
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    You are nervous because you are entering into a terrible sin. Sin means it is bad.

    You might be struck with lightning, but I don't know if God still does that.

    "If he likes it, then he better put a ring on it." -- Beyonce.

    pretty sure God said save judgment for Him. :tongue:

    God also said "I ain't passing the damned remote!"

    I've heard that God gets misquoted once in a while.
  • Rivers2k
    Rivers2k Posts: 380 Member
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    pretty sure he didn't say that. Please show me where he says that.
  • mojohowitz
    mojohowitz Posts: 900 Member
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    raptor-bible-god-humor-comedic-velociraptor-awesome-jesus-religion-funny-lol-laugh-laug.jpg
  • cherryd69
    cherryd69 Posts: 340
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    Everything thing that he does will eventually annoy you, even though you love him to bits.


    1) leaving dishes with scraps of breakfast cereal in the sink (so its super hard to wash!)
    2) leaving washing on the floor, even though there is a wash basket RIGHT FRICKIN THERE!!
    3) his hobby(s) take up entire household, whilst yours are shoved in a corner, and the moment you dare to leave your yoga ball out your 'taking up the whole house'
    4) its like having a 3rd child, although this child you get to do more adult fun things with.


    Ill leave my list there, i love my hubby to the end of the world an back, with or without the annoying traits :D
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    THe only advice I have is dont' let him decorate anything or bring anything he considers decorative or furniture. You should be fine.
  • Mariannewww
    Mariannewww Posts: 67
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    All the god stuff is a joke right? People don't actually force their belief system like that on people in this day and age do they?

    Bible says if you sleep with a squid you get smitten in the knees but I'm yet to come back from the beach walking like John Cleese...
  • tzig00
    tzig00 Posts: 875 Member
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    It will be fine.
    Has your Mother explained your role?
    Cooking, cleaning, laundry, getting your man a beer?

    You forgot about the sammiches. You have to make your man a sammich and know that he wants one before he knows he does. Oh, and always be in the mood.
  • TheStephil
    TheStephil Posts: 858 Member
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    It's normal to be nervous. It's a huge step.

    I moved in with my boyfriend after we were dating for 4 months. He had 6 months left of his lease and we wanted to see if we would do well living with each other before we signed a year long lease with each other. I had my mom's to go back to if it didn't work out. It was my first time moving out of my parent's house and while there were some things to adjust to (bathroom connected to bedroom... oh joy) it was such a great idea.

    Make sure to do your part around the house and try not to nag him in the beginning. See what type of chores he does, how often he cleans, does dishes, etc. Every person takes care of their living space differently. I like to save the majority of cleaning until the weekend and my boyfriend likes to little things throughout the week. We understand how each other works and that allows us to live together without pulling each other's hair out.

    i like the tip about never going to bed angry. That's a rule of mine as well.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    You are nervous because you are entering into a terrible sin. Sin means it is bad.

    You might be struck with lightning, but I don't know if God still does that.

    "If he likes it, then he better put a ring on it." -- Beyonce.

    I have to agree. Is there any way you can ask your mother to move in with the two of you?

    This way she can make sure you two don't consummate before marriage?

    Oh wow! I was all for this because I was under the impression her mother WAS moving in with them. That was my understanding from reading the OP. If I misunderstood then I have to join the voices of those saying this is a mistake. Until you have promised yourselves to each other before God and witnesses with vows never to part then any pleasures of the flesh should not be occurring and I just believe the temptation will be too strong if you are unsupervised under the same roof.

    Think about it: is a few moments of carnal pleasure worth eternal hellfire?

    Carnal. Uuuuuuuunhhh! That word always drives me nutsbonkers.
  • jzammetti
    jzammetti Posts: 1,956 Member
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    You are nervous because you are entering into a terrible sin. Sin means it is bad.

    You might be struck with lightning, but I don't know if God still does that.

    "If he likes it, then he better put a ring on it." -- Beyonce.

    Agreed! check out statistics on Divorce rates among people who live together first. They are much higher. If he doesnt care enough to marry you then you are setting you up for heart break.

    I am not a statistic...but my hubby and I lived together for three years before we maried (even had a kid first - SHOCKING, I know) but we are celebrating 21 years next month. So, statistics are averages..just saying.
  • MiloBloom83
    MiloBloom83 Posts: 2,724 Member
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    Who's going to be the first to fart in front of each other? You or him?

    NO NO NO - no farting in front of your significant other. Burping is bad too. My advice (before I saw that post) was exactly this: do not get too comfortable that you scratch inappropriate stuff or fart in front of him. lol

    Only fart and belch DURING sex. He won't even notice...
  • TheStephil
    TheStephil Posts: 858 Member
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    Everything thing that he does will eventually annoy you, even though you love him to bits.


    1) leaving dishes with scraps of breakfast cereal in the sink (so its super hard to wash!)
    2) leaving washing on the floor, even though there is a wash basket RIGHT FRICKIN THERE!!
    3) his hobby(s) take up entire household, whilst yours are shoved in a corner, and the moment you dare to leave your yoga ball out your 'taking up the whole house'
    4) its like having a 3rd child, although this child you get to do more adult fun things with.


    Ill leave my list there, i love my hubby to the end of the world an back, with or without the annoying traits :D

    Number 1! Drives me nuts. He likes to leave his baked bean remains in the bowl as well. That stuff is super glue.
    Number 2: He leaves his in the dryer until i need to do laundry then I have to put them in the basket.

    I love him though so those things don't bug me for long.
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
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    Separate bank accounts.

    Make sure he has a job first.

    Never rent-to-own furniture or appliances. Use milk crates if you have to.

    Make sure you don't move next door to 1ConcreteGirl... or Urkel... or just_fur_luck.

    Steer clear of the midwest. They get a little uptight when black women start stealing all their white men.

    HAha! This^^
  • concordancia
    concordancia Posts: 5,320 Member
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    You are nervous because you are entering into a terrible sin. Sin means it is bad.

    You might be struck with lightning, but I don't know if God still does that.

    "If he likes it, then he better put a ring on it." -- Beyonce.

    Agreed! check out statistics on Divorce rates among people who live together first.

    And you will find that the higher divorce rates are for people who have lived with multiple partners. People who live with, then marry one partner have similar divorce rates as people who never lived together.
  • BoomstickChick
    BoomstickChick Posts: 428 Member
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    I was barely 19 and nervous too. Everything went fine though. Being on your own is pretty scary!
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    You are nervous because you are entering into a terrible sin. Sin means it is bad.

    You might be struck with lightning, but I don't know if God still does that.

    "If he likes it, then he better put a ring on it." -- Beyonce.

    Agreed! check out statistics on Divorce rates among people who live together first. They are much higher. If he doesnt care enough to marry you then you are setting you up for heart break.

    I am not a statistic...but my hubby and I lived together for three years before we maried (even had a kid first - SHOCKING, I know) but we are celebrating 21 years next month. So, statistics are averages..just saying.

    Statistics are so mean
  • TheDarkestStar87
    TheDarkestStar87 Posts: 246 Member
    Options
    You are nervous because you are entering into a terrible sin. Sin means it is bad.

    You might be struck with lightning, but I don't know if God still does that.

    "If he likes it, then he better put a ring on it." -- Beyonce.

    I have to agree. Is there any way you can ask your mother to move in with the two of you?

    This way she can make sure you two don't consummate before marriage?

    Oh wow! I was all for this because I was under the impression her mother WAS moving in with them. That was my understanding from reading the OP. If I misunderstood then I have to join the voices of those saying this is a mistake. Until you have promised yourselves to each other before God and witnesses with vows never to part then any pleasures of the flesh should not be occurring and I just believe the temptation will be too strong if you are unsupervised under the same roof.

    Think about it: is a few moments of carnal pleasure worth eternal hellfire?


    Please tell me you guys are being sarky and are not really stuck in the 19th century? ohwell: (or should that be :devil: )


    Moving out of home is always a mixture of excitement and nervousness. It's totally normal to be a bit nervous, it's a huge step and congratulations on committing to it, I'm sure you will do well.

    Most important rule is: Remember you're still two people, don't suddenly become glued to each other. Don't give up your hobbies/catchups with friends/etc. and don't expect him to give up his. Otherwise one of you will sooner or later feel a bit choked.

    I disagree on the no joint bank account thing, I found it makes things so much easier when paying rent/bills/nights out. Just have it in addition to your sole accounts and agree on a set and equal amount that you're both going to put in each month (say a grand each). That way if things ever do go wrong, you know to split whatever's in there in half.

    Have rules around the chores, like if you cook he washes up and vice versa. Same with the cleaning, one week you do the bathroom he does the kitchen, next week you swap over.

    It'll take a while for a good routine to establish itself, but as long as you two can work in a team together and talk things through whenever something bugs you you'll be fine. I wish you many happy years together :flowerforyou:

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