Why explain your diet to me?

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AmigaMaria001
AmigaMaria001 Posts: 489 Member
edited January 2015 in Goal: Maintaining Weight
I lost 60lbs last year and for some reason everyone now seems to want to tell me about THEIR diet! They don't usually ask how I lost the weight, they just start in by saying things like, "I've decided to give up sugar, or carbs or...." Things like, I am eating my food on a smaller plate from now on or I have quit snacking in the evenings... Well okay then! :smiley:
I just have no idea how to respond to these people!
I usually say, "Oh really? Well good for you - or How is that working for you?"
Have any of you have this happen after significant weight loss?
Believe me when I say, I do not judge anyone for being overweight! Heck - I was overweight most of my life so I have no room to judge - I am just thankful that I finally came to my senses AND found MFP. When a few people have asked me how I did it, I always point them to MFP but I never offer unless asked. That would just be rude.
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Replies

  • sheepotato
    sheepotato Posts: 600 Member
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    I don't know why people are like that, I think sometimes people ask just so they can talk about themselves.


    Also I'll never understand why people will believe any ridiculous plan or pill will work but when you show them/tell them about MFP and they say 'Oh that will never work.' SMH.
  • middlehaitch
    middlehaitch Posts: 8,484 Member
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    Maybe they are using it ( their weight loss method) as an opening gambit for a conversation on weight loss. A lot of people think it rude and a bit blunt to ask the 'how did you do it' question outright.

    I was picking a friend up to go shopping and her greeting was ' I am cutting out all pasta and white bread'. Strange, so I asked why, and she said she thought if I could lose the weight so could she.
    We ended up skipping the shopping and having a really good heart to heart on weight loss and exercise; that is what she wanted but didn't know how to ask without sounding rude.

    Oddly enough I have never had the MFP glaze over look from people that is so often reported here; quite the opposite in fact, people are usually relieved and interested when I explain how simple it is, and that you don't have to give up the foods you love, eat at strange times or exercise like crazy.

    Cheers, h.
  • wnlbutterfly
    wnlbutterfly Posts: 35 Member
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    I would say perhaps because they see your success and are mentioning what they have in mind to lose weight and expect feedback.
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
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    Yes, this happens to me all the time. So when someone tells me they are giving up sugars or carbs...I dont know whether to say something or not. It kills me.
  • al142
    al142 Posts: 35 Member
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    I have definitely seen the MFP glaze over look. "Oh, no, I could never calorie count. That's too complicated." Urgh.

    I think when people see you have lost weight and start telling you about their weight loss plan, it's likely that they see you as someone who will be interested in their story. Everyone likes to talk about their plans, and very few people care to hear them.
  • AmigaMaria001
    AmigaMaria001 Posts: 489 Member
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    farfromthetree wrote: »
    Yes, this happens to me all the time. So when someone tells me they are giving up sugars or carbs...I don't know whether to say something or not. It kills me.
    I guess that is exactly what I was trying to say... Do I go ahead and tell them about MFP and how I ate all the foods I love without giving up a thing except excess calories - or do I just listen and wait for them to ASK? I really don't know how to respond and I don't want them to feel like I am flaunting my success - or make them feel like they need to lose weight just because I did.
  • auntchellebelle
    auntchellebelle Posts: 127 Member
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    People want a pat on the back for taking the first step. I have noticed that. I am still pretty overweight and I prefer not to discuss what I am doing because everyone has different opinions on what they think will work.
  • rand486
    rand486 Posts: 270 Member
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    Two things are true of just about anyone:

    1) They're insecure
    2) They like talking about themselves

    We are all doing it right now, in this very forum, aren't we? ;)
  • AmigaMaria001
    AmigaMaria001 Posts: 489 Member
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    rand486 wrote: »
    Two things are true of just about anyone:

    1) They're insecure
    2) They like talking about themselves

    We are all doing it right now, in this very forum, aren't we? ;)

    TRUE, but what is baffling to me is that NOW they are telling me about their diet - not when I was still fat! I am afraid that telling them how I lost the weight (If they haven't asked) will feel like rubbing their nose in the fact that they are still overweight and I'm not. I don't mind listening to them but I sometimes have to bite my tongue when they tell me about their fad or freaky weight loss plans. I want so badly to tell them it doesn't have to be that hard or expensive... just eat less and move more AND log, log, log! SO simple really
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
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    AmigaMaria001 wrote: »
    farfromthetree wrote: »
    Yes, this happens to me all the time. So when someone tells me they are giving up sugars or carbs...I don't know whether to say something or not. It kills me.
    I guess that is exactly what I was trying to say... Do I go ahead and tell them about MFP and how I ate all the foods I love without giving up a thing except excess calories - or do I just listen and wait for them to ASK? I really don't know how to respond and I don't want them to feel like I am flaunting my success - or make them feel like they need to lose weight just because I did.



    I really have struggled with this too, but now I wait until someone asks. Unfortunately, I have spent so much time and effort with people who claimed they wanted my help for them to quit after a week. So now I am more cautious. I adopted a "noob" from one of the threads and it is so rewarding when someone gets it. She is receptive, and really following through so far. I know it's early but I can tell it just clicked for her!
  • DeliD25
    DeliD25 Posts: 19 Member
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    Funny because I have found food is such a sensitive thing for people. I know a few vegetarians and raw vegans who juice for days. I also know a few people on the weight loss journey who are not eating in healthy ways but rather using fad "programs" of shakes and processed "diet" food. People seem so defensive of their choices it seems safer to talk about sex, religion and politics. Hahaha :D
  • jkwolly
    jkwolly Posts: 3,049 Member
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    The worst is when people ask how you do it, you say it's all about calories in vs. out, and then they respond with "WELL I AM ON THIS NEW THING OF NO SUGAR, NO CARBS BLAH BLAH"

    And then four months later they're asking again how you're doing it....

    Like.... seriously?
  • jkwolly
    jkwolly Posts: 3,049 Member
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    al142 wrote: »
    I have definitely seen the MFP glaze over look. "Oh, no, I could never calorie count. That's too complicated." Urgh.

    I think when people see you have lost weight and start telling you about their weight loss plan, it's likely that they see you as someone who will be interested in their story. Everyone likes to talk about their plans, and very few people care to hear them.
    "Weighing your food? That sounds obsessive, I could never do that."


  • AmigaMaria001
    AmigaMaria001 Posts: 489 Member
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    jkwolly wrote: »
    The worst is when people ask how you do it, you say it's all about calories in vs. out, and then they respond with "WELL I AM ON THIS NEW THING OF NO SUGAR, NO CARBS BLAH BLAH"

    And then four months later they're asking again how you're doing it....

    Like.... seriously?

    Oh how funny and true! But I used to do the same thing - I just never thought it could be this easy.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,949 Member
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    Hahah that happened to me once - I lost weight and then our secretary said she wanted to lose weight too. She said she would try to do Weight Watchers (which is what I did until I found this nice free thing called MFP) and then she showed up with a cleanse instead! And was saying it would make her lose weight because clay (yup, clay - like mud) is good for you. Say WHAT!? lo and behold, 3 weeks later if she hadn't gained it all back - and she just blamed it on going back to eating, no mention of the fact that cleanse didn't do anything for her in the first place.
  • jkwolly
    jkwolly Posts: 3,049 Member
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    VeryKatie wrote: »
    Hahah that happened to me once - I lost weight and then our secretary said she wanted to lose weight too. She said she would try to do Weight Watchers (which is what I did until I found this nice free thing called MFP) and then she showed up with a cleanse instead! And was saying it would make her lose weight because clay (yup, clay - like mud) is good for you. Say WHAT!? lo and behold, 3 weeks later if she hadn't gained it all back - and she just blamed it on going back to eating, no mention of the fact that cleanse didn't do anything for her in the first place.
    I heard clay can be pretty filling.
  • KeysGirl23
    KeysGirl23 Posts: 117 Member
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    I had a really good friend once tell me that she doesn't know why she's not losing because she eats a lot of healthy things like vegetables and does a lot of walking. And this wasn't the first, second or third time... so I couldn't just keep my yap shut any longer. I told her for all of her walking she really needed to change her activity level from sedentary because she does this for a job and has for years. I also said that it doesn't matter what types of food she ate, it was about counting the calories in vs. out and if it went in her mouth (lets say like a piece of gum) then she needed to count those 5 calories. She got all sideways and offended, but I just didn't care at that point. I was tired of hearing her go on and on about why she wasn't losing. I know she wasn't having this conversation with anyone else, just the good friend that had lost 40+lbs. So, my advice... if they have the chutzpah to bring it up, why not say your peace?
  • GothyFaery
    GothyFaery Posts: 762 Member
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    AmigaMaria001 wrote: »
    farfromthetree wrote: »
    Yes, this happens to me all the time. So when someone tells me they are giving up sugars or carbs...I don't know whether to say something or not. It kills me.
    I guess that is exactly what I was trying to say... Do I go ahead and tell them about MFP and how I ate all the foods I love without giving up a thing except excess calories - or do I just listen and wait for them to ASK? I really don't know how to respond and I don't want them to feel like I am flaunting my success - or make them feel like they need to lose weight just because I did.

    I used to try to tell them about MFP and how they can lose weight and eat food without cutting things out but people tend to get defensive about that. Like I'm telling them what they are doing is wrong. Now I just smile and listen. If they are doing something extremely restrictive I might mention something like "oh, I could have never have done that. I lost my weight by just counting calories. You'll have to let me know how [whatever restrictive thing they're doing] works for you" But I have to say it in a genuinely friendly tone and a smile or they might take it wrong and get pissed off.

    Ultimately I feel like if they come to me and bring up a topic I didn't ask about, I have the right to give my opinion of it. I just try to not offend people. And people are offended so easily nowadays
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,712 Member
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    DeliD25 wrote: »
    Funny because I have found food is such a sensitive thing for people. I know a few vegetarians and raw vegans who juice for days. I also know a few people on the weight loss journey who are not eating in healthy ways but rather using fad "programs" of shakes and processed "diet" food. People seem so defensive of their choices it seems safer to talk about sex, religion and politics. Hahaha :D

    Isn't that the truth?! It's gotten really crazy. Your post made me laugh, but it's also very true.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,949 Member
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    jkwolly wrote: »
    VeryKatie wrote: »
    Hahah that happened to me once - I lost weight and then our secretary said she wanted to lose weight too. She said she would try to do Weight Watchers (which is what I did until I found this nice free thing called MFP) and then she showed up with a cleanse instead! And was saying it would make her lose weight because clay (yup, clay - like mud) is good for you. Say WHAT!? lo and behold, 3 weeks later if she hadn't gained it all back - and she just blamed it on going back to eating, no mention of the fact that cleanse didn't do anything for her in the first place.
    I heard clay can be pretty filling.

    I just figure it doesn't have any fat, fiber, or protein. Might be rich in iron at least.

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