Death of a loved one, weight gain and loss of all energy

Michelle2W

{{{Hugs}}}
I suggest, to start getting healthy from the inside out. Seek support/counseling and work on getting healthy physically, mentally and spiritually. You are stronger than you know.

Michelle2W

I just saw your post about being in a support group. Prayers sweet lady:-)

kristimason3

I am so incredibly sorry. You are here (and here is a great place full of support and great information to help you along your way), putting one foot in front of the other, going to school to become a caregiver and undoubtedly give back in a big way as nurses do and doing your best to maintain a normal life for your family. That makes you an incredibly strong and amazingly selfless woman. You can and will do this!
I had a brother who died at a young age from a congenital heart problem. Unfortunately, my mother did not recover well and never really got up strong enough to do what you are already doing just 2.5 years later. She had 4 other children and the effects of it all were devastating to say the least. So, from my perspective you are doing amazing.
My mother died 7 years ago from Acute Myologenous Leukemia. I was 27 and had just given birth to my daughter via a botched c section which nearly took my own life right before her diagnosis. She survived only about 6 months. And a painful 6 months it was. After she passed I balooned up to 220 lbs, the biggest I had ever been. I did not want to get out of bed, I was exhausted all of the time but like you said had to do it because I had a young son and a new baby and a husband who needed me. A time frame as to when the trauma becomes less exhausting? I think that's probably different for everyone. For me it took longer than 3 years before I started feeling even remotely like myself again. In fact, I have huge chunks of time there that I don't even remember. Its all still a fog. I yo yo dieted a lot over the past 4 years, then found mfp about 4 months ago. I have had such great success here and I know you can too! Try to just take it one step at a time. If you like south beach that's great, but my advice would be that whatever way you choose to approach the weight loss try to do it in a way that is sustainable long term for you personally. The changes you make need to be easy to implement into your daily life. You're busy and have a lot going on so the simpler the better. I know it was eye opening for me the first week or two here just honestly logging what I was normally eating and seeing how much sugar, carbs, how little protein etc I was eating. Then making adjustments and substitutions that were livable for me to get those numbers better. I walk every day now and that time, in my mind at least, is my time with my mother. I talk to her and feel her light around me, knowing she would be proud of me that I'm getting back to living more and showing my kids that I'm strong. God bless you, your surviving child, your husband and your family. Sending love and light your way.

deviboy1592

Sorry for your loss of your daughter. Death of a child is the hardest thing anyone has to go through, stay strong and healthy, your son will need you.

LAWoman72

Oh no. I am so very, very sorry.

AglaeaC

mrspauleon wrote: »

I did join planet fitness and just got my husband to also, so now hopefully, we can go as a family. I am hoping that more exercise will also help with the energy levels.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I would do what others have suggested earlier, see a therapist (psychiatrist preferably if it turns out to be depression alongside the grief) and perhaps also get the thyroid checked out again.

I also agree with whoever said it is a cycle in the sense that if you feel tired, you won't do even a bit of exercise, and then you feel even more tired. To break the cycle, even a few minutes a day would work and from there you can increase the amount slowly.

As for depending on your husband to go with you to the gym, I'm a bit hesitant about it, because he might not be at the same stage as you in his grief, and might have other, individual needs. If it works for the two of you to keep you together and close, it's fine, but the pressure might become too much at some point. Best thing is to do it for your own sake, so you have energy to give to those, who depend on you.

All the best to you and your family.

Curlychip

Im so so sorry for your loss xxx (*) It is seriously rubbish, horrible.
I lost my son at birth 3.5 years ago and am really just starting to get going on the weight loss now. I appreciate that it may not be as unbelievable as losing a child you have had longer with, but it knocked me off life for at least 2 years (even with a rainbow, who is now a crazy 2 year old) and I continue my little patterns to keep him alive in some way, just quietly.

The lack of energy is most likely due to your mood and so many things that you have going on (I have very similar lifestyle to you). Treatment is not a failure and that could mean medication and/or psychological therapy. Really, dropping something is key, or just taking a break for a week to re-evaluate what is essential with some time on your own and maybe get a bit more uninterrupted sleep/rest.

I don't know if it would be similar for you, but Ive found it impossible to adjust my eating without exercise. I never want to go out, but it always makes me feel better and have more energy the rest of the day.
Best of luck and strength xxx

Mamapaul76

Thank you all. I really appreciate the support and advice. It's not easy some days, I won't lie. There but for the grace of God, go I.

I'm taking each step as they come. I will definitely see about an Endo referral. I took my daughter to one so I am a bit familiar with them.

We did go to the gym tonight and it was nice. My feet are sore now but I can deal.

lindsayskillings

My mother was diagnosed with metastasized breast cancer in January of last year and we lost her in August. I have gained 40lbs and now I am trying to lose it.

deviboy1592

lindsayskillings wrote: »

My mother was diagnosed with metastasized breast cancer in January of last year and we lost her in August. I have gained 40lbs and now I am trying to lose it.

Sorry for your loss, best of luck on your journey.