I cried today...I need all the help I can get!

IrmaElocin

Hi! Happy new year and new you! Congratulations, remember you're not alone obviously and that sticking to your goals- just doing it - without any excuse is the hardest but most valuable thing that will change your life. I'd love to add to this community of support! Add me if you'd like.

AllOutof_Bubblegum

You. Your attitude is awesome. You will make it.

leggup

Look_at_me wrote: »

I will detox for 7 days with doctors approval. After that I will go on a healthy balanced diet.

Good for you for deciding to make a change, but there is NO REASON to do a "detox." There is no poison in your body that your liver and kidneys and other filtration organs can't handle. If a doctor approved a detox, I would find a new doctor.

Why not just start eating your healthy balanced diet today? You can do it. You don't have to go through a purification ritual first. You're more likely to burn out if you put yourself on a very low calorie diet (smoothies/meal replacement) or give up the pleasure of food.

It might also help you to look why you started eating your emotions. Yes, you moved to a new place and haven't made friends, but you have your husband. You're not alone. You also have the opportunity to meet new friends. Maybe find a light activity you can do with other people that could help you meet new people and stay active? Many walking groups go at a leisurely pace and don't go past 1 mile anyway. There are also aqua aerobics classes that are low impact.

Eire228

You almost made me cry reading that! Good for you for taking control of your life. Did you get your treadmill yet? I think it's amazing that you want to walk a mile every day, and know that it may start out very slowly. Even if you walk a quarter of a mile on day one, that's more than you did yesterday. Congrats, lady!! Welcome to the new you.

tj_travis

I'd like to send this person an add request but don't know how. I just started again. This time I will succeed. I weigh 248# @ 5'5". Restarted here 3 days ago with determination.

scarletgloriavargas

Hello!
I just wanted to say congratulations on being so honest with your self ! It's not easy! You figured out what type of relationship you have with food and you took the time to really look at yourself in the mirror instead of continuing to hide your body.
As someone who lost 30lbs , I say with this personal experience: once you begin to live a healthier lifestyle, every other aspect of your life will improve. I PROMISE!!
Here's the thing, once you start living healthier, your entire body is not only going to look better but feel better..including your MIND. You want to make more friends? Once you start getting energy, feel happier (naturally happens from exercise and nutrients) you can go out and do positive things and meet positive people..because you will WANT to (ex: volunteering or group exercise classes)! You will find a whole new confidence in where you can smile at others, say hi, introduce yourself; once you feel healthier, once you have more energy, once you are happier with your day to day choices...you just have to CHOOSE to put yourself out there.
Now you can keep cooking...you like it so why not?? Now you have the opportunity to get creative..how do you make healthy versions of foods you love? You get to look online for delicious healthy recipes!
You now have the opportunity to create a whole new world..AND YOUVE ALREADY STARTED!!

tj_travis

You can do this.You've taken the first steps. I am also doing this. I weighed in at YMCA at 248# on Saturday. After I got off my pity trip ...;).
I am serious about getting this weight off. I saved my old clothes, as when I bought them, I gained too fast to wear them. 5-7 lbs per week...what I gained! My goal weight by Dec ( or before) is to lose 100 lbs. You are welcome to look at my plans and screw ups ...also to give critique or kudos. Both are fine with me! The prize for the biggest weight loss in 2 months, in the competition at YMCA. ..is $500! I may or may not win, but it gives me a goal to strive for and a purpose. Best of wishes for you...for all of us! ADD ME , AS I dont know how to add people?

GCPgirl

The first step is to get yourself in the right mindset to want the change and you got it! It is a lifestyle change that you will be proud of. You have a support system here! I will send you a friend request...good luck!

MizzMaldy

Congratulations on having the courage to be open, honest, and ready to change. You can do this. It doesn't matter how long it takes, slow progress is better than no progress at all. Good Luck!

madlynn2

Good luck to you on this journey! I have felt the same as you many times but you are right, WE just need to do this for ourselves. One thing I am doing different this time is logging everything.. even if I am WAY over calories. At least it keeps me honest. All the best to you.

nuttynanners

Good job! I haven't been taking pictures and I'll regret that. Every time I even see myself on a security camera in a store I wince and try to block it from my memory. You are doing a great job of facing your problems head on. Plus you have some time to focus on yourself before your husband comes home! Sounds like you are setting yourself up for success. You CAN do it.

gemmadoel

You can do it! don't give up, carry on, do slow changes so its not as hard that's what im trying to do and its working and makes me feel so much better, slowly cut down

gothchiq

Some small dumbbells for working your upper body will help too. You can start super small, with just like 3 lb, and then move up slowly a pound at a time. You can even do these lifts sitting down, while watching TV. Also, if you feel hungry but don't have many calories left in your allotment, apples, strawberries, cantaloupe, nonstarchy vegetables and big veggie salads with 2 tbsp. of light dressing can help "fill the hole." Some dill, chives, Mrs. Dash, or other herb/spice mixes can bring flavor to those veggies without having to add fats or excessive salt. That way you don't either screw up and binge, or feel starving and shaky. Lean meats, whole grains, and many many vegetables will help you get where you're going.

naparker333

I could have written your post....but not so eloquently! I'll be 51 in February...and a few weeks ago, I just got fed up! The week after Thanksgiving, I looked at myself through REAL eyes, not excuses, and decided that I am NOT going to go the way of so many relatives...old, debilitated, helpless as they age. Beginning really IS the hardest part, and now that I'm a month and a half into this, it's becoming second nature. There are sooo many people here for support and help...please feel free to add me, if you like. We're all in this together, and we've all got each other!

AliluniqueLaura

I have the same body shape as you, skinny legs and big middle. I am 57. I only started a few weeks ago and already have noticed changes. I couldn't walk my dog very far. I can now walk him all over our property. I started with small walks and now can walk 40 minutes at a very fast pace. I bought a fitness watch, polar ft4. It was easy to use and I can see my progress on how long I can walk and how many calories I burn. I agree with other post that detox is not necessary. Plan your meals with real food. Buy a food scale and drink water. You can do this!!!

All4Gavin

Way to go!! I just started back on here the first of the year. I have dabbled with this site for over 2 years, but this time, like you, I'm in it to win it! I log religiously. I am 5'7'' and have about 70 lbs to lose. We can do this!!

GretchenB02

Look_at_me wrote: »

I was attractive once. I felt beautiful and sexy. Not right now. I let myself go and there is nobody else to blame than me. I am only 51 years old and feel like my life is over. I cried when I took the pictures today. People cry on funerals, so I guess it's alright. I buried the old me today.

My husband, who loves me unconditionally, is on a business trip. I went to my doctor first thing in the morning. Got my blood results, went on the scale (243.5 / 5'8) and before he could give me a speech I told him to "zip it". I told him what I am going to do and I have his approval.

Look at me...look at my picture. I did that to myself. You see the dog in the pic. I can't walk her right now. I don't have the energy to carry myself and all that extra weight around. I bought a treadmill today. It is going to be delivered tomorrow. I WILL walk on that thing. I will start slowly, but will walk 1 mile every day...even if it will take hours.

I want to have a healthy weight and I will do everything that I can, to make it happen. Food is not my friend. I used food to cover up my emotions. I feel lonely. We just moved here one year ago and I haven't made any friends yet. So I ate, food became my best friend. Chocolate, carbs, bread, butter. I love to cook, eat during cooking. Then I sit in my chair and read or watch TV. Drink too much wine to numb myself more. It's not that I need it. I don't even know why I do it. Did it make me feel good? Not really. I felt always guilty, but avoided the ugly truth. Wider shirts, elastic pants, bigger jackets...I am a master in disguise.

Not anymore. The old me is gone, the new me was born today.

I had a open bottle of red wine, I poured it down the drain. All chocolate, candy and other things are now in my neighbors house. I emptied the pantry, got rid of everything that won't fit into my diet plan. My husband will come back on the 23rd., that's 10 days that I can just focus on myself.

I will take a weekly picture in the same outfit. I will be brutally honest. I hope to find friends on my way to a new me. I would help others, but right now I need all the help I can get. Look at me?

Please help me!

You can do this! Once I got serious about my health I was able to make some changes. Good luck.

katjones726

Hey! Feel free to add me as a buddy! I have also let myself go. I have been on here for 2 weeks and have lost 5 lbs so far.

applcorp

I so understand where you're coming from. You got this!

Look_at_me

Oh my Gosh, thank you for all your replies and friend request. It seems I am blessed with a good support system here.

The treadmill was delivered 1 hr ago. It is huge and even has an incline what made me laugh. I can hardly walk straight, so the incline will be a challenge, but I am glad I have this option for later on.

The detox was my idea, I asked for the doctors approval. He tried to talk me out of it, but gave up when he saw my face :-). I bought a juicer over 1 year ago, never used it. I will juice twice a day and will finally try the machine and use the juice recipe books that I bought with it. I always wanted to do it. My husband is on a business trip, so the next 9 days will be mine. I don't have to cook for him. Can focus on me. So I will have a healthy juice for breakfast and Dinner and a beautiful, healthy meal for lunch.

I will write down what I eat and drink. I will log in here every day and will give back support as soon as I will be able to.

Thank you ALL.

FatOldManMN

Looks to me that all you have to do is lose some weight.

Ellaskat

Look_at_me wrote: »

. I cried when I took the pictures today. People cry on funerals, so I guess it's alright. I buried the old me today.

You are amazing! Yea you! How awesome to have a moment of clarity, where you were able to see your goal - see what will make you happy - and set a plan to make that happen! Soooo many people (I think) walk around all the time, totally miserable, never making a plan to change their lives for more happiness.

I see you as courageous - and beautiful - and strong! You can do this!

lisaab27

I'm Lisa. This is my story. I have type 2 diabetes and high blood pressure and I damaged my heart from my crummy diet. God was tapping on my shoulder to make a change, but I was ignoring Him. You can only ignore God so long before He gives you a kick in the backside. I weighed 327 lbs. and I got that kick. After being rushed to the ER, I vowed to eat healthy and I lost 130 lbs. That summer started swimming laps even though I am a crummy swimmer, and in the winter I was walking, but only a mile a day due to knee problems but it's helped. After I broke 200 lbs., I decided I was going to "maintain" for awhile even though I still had not made it all the way to my goal of 150. For awhile I was doing great but I started slipping gradually. Constant knee problems made it hard to walk and on a good day I can only do about 1/2 mile. Right now, I haven't swam laps since the summer. Anyway, I vowed I was not going to allow myself to regain all my weight back so here I am. I feel the Lord, tapping on my shoulder again and I'm not ignoring Him this time! So I weighed myself January 12 and I have gained back almost 50 lbs over the last 2 years! I thought I gained back about 25! How we live in denial! I almost hit the floor. I kept a food journal before in a notebook, but this time I'm trying this and hope having friends will help me to achieve my goals of getting healthy and staying that way. I support your efforts, feel free to add me and maybe we can help each other!

enterdanger

Welcome! I love to cook too and can send you some links to some really great food blogs that have helped me immensely.

ConnieR

Welcome, and congrats on your new start. It's only up from here...just take it day by day and you will reach you goal. Much love to you.

beertrollruss

If you can self medicate with exercise, instead of food and alcohol, you'll be on the path to good health and a better emotional well being. Once you get comfortable walking, you may want to walk around your neighborhood. Maybe you'll meet a neighbor you can walk with. Another way to kill time, burn some calories and exercise your brain is to take up a musical instrument. Music is quite therapeutic.

Mauigirl62

I can totally relate to you, Look_at_me! I am 61 and in a similar situation as you but with ten fewer years to fix it! I joined MFP almost two weeks ago at 172 and have already lost about 3 lbs., if I can believe my stupid scale that is kind of ornery. I am only 5 feet tall so I am considered obese with a BMI over 33. I find inputting all of my calories into the system really keeps me in line and the hardest thing for me, giving up my wine, has made a lot of difference. Like you, I am lucky to have a husband who loves me no matter what, but I feel bad because I feel so unattractive I don't make much of a partner lately! I am also concerned about long-term effects on my health. I have not started really exercising yet but did join a yoga class to get me started. I used to go and then stopped. I am looking forward to supporting each other to reach our goals!

CSARdiver

Congrats! No worries, the human body is a remarkable machine. Took how many years to get out of shape? With a bit of works and healthy choices you can back in to tip top shape in a matter of months. Just don't over do it and be realistic in your goals.

Bustergirl14

If your husband loves you unconditionally, he will understand when you tell him that you won't be cooking for him anymore. My current eating plan consists of lean protein, vegetables and fruit. No to low carbs. My husband who loves me uncondtionally and is supportive 100% of my commitment to lose weight helps me cook a dinner every night that fits into my eating plan, and he eats the same thing I do. I plan and make my own breakfast and pack my own lunch every day so he can eat whatever he wants for breakfast and lunch.
I'm on day 9 of the first phase of the 17 day diet. It is working for me. I tried South Beach about 10 years ago and lost 50 pounds and then spent the next 10 years slowly putting it all back on (divorce, hysterectomy, I found all kinds of excuses to eat too much, drink too much and not exercise). I find I do better with an actual meal plan for each meal rather than when I generalize about a "healtlhy" meal.
Also, as soon as you feel up to it, try to find a small local gym or the YMCA and look into their group exercise offerings. The Y here ha a class specifically for people who needed to lose 50+ lbs. You will get a lot of support here but you need to find and build a network of people where you live, too. Going for a long walk goes by a lot faster, and I usually walk longer, if I walk with a friend.

Look_at_me

Bustergirl14 wrote: »

If your husband loves you unconditionally, he will understand when you tell him that you won't be cooking for him anymore. My current eating plan consists of lean protein, vegetables and fruit. No to low carbs. My husband who loves me uncondtionally and is supportive 100% of my commitment to lose weight helps me cook a dinner every night that fits into my eating plan, and he eats the same thing I do. I plan and make my own breakfast and pack my own lunch every day so he can eat whatever he wants for breakfast and lunch.
I'm on day 9 of the first phase of the 17 day diet. It is working for me. I tried South Beach about 10 years ago and lost 50 pounds and then spent the next 10 years slowly putting it all back on (divorce, hysterectomy, I found all kinds of excuses to eat too much, drink too much and not exercise). I find I do better with an actual meal plan for each meal rather than when I generalize about a "healtlhy" meal.
Also, as soon as you feel up to it, try to find a small local gym or the YMCA and look into their group exercise offerings. The Y here ha a class specifically for people who needed to lose 50+ lbs. You will get a lot of support here but you need to find and build a network of people where you live, too. Going for a long walk goes by a lot faster, and I usually walk longer, if I walk with a friend.

My husband is skinny and tall. I think I can still cook for him and for me at the same time by just making wise choices. Telling him I wont cook anymore, as you suggested, won't wor for me. I don't expect him to follow my mealplan, since he doesn't need it. I will continue to cook for my husband as I have done the last 25 years :-).

A healthy relationship is not about "my way or the highway" and there is no "i" in team. Like everything else, its about finding a middleway that will work for both of us and will make us BOTH happy. This is not going to be just a diet or a cheap fix, this is going to be a new and healthier lifestyle for the rest of OUR lives. This is going to be a learning process :-)

Sorry, but that's my humbled opinion