We broke up because...
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haha she changed her number and moved away0
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He didn't like a little mystery0
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found out about her Mob connections.0
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There was always a mob of women around him0
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she was too jealous0
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He wasn't jealous enough0
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Wanted me to "take care of" her ex!0
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I won the lottery and told her I was trading her in for a newer model...0
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Said I was old like the Crypt Keeper0
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Took everything personally0
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I swapped him for 2 younger models
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Was too dispassionate0
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Not passionate enough0
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Ran off and changed her name on me!0
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He lusted after a certain duck0
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Lust got us in trouble. Just not with each other.0
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Because she just wouldn't let me play out my Catwoman and Poison Ivy fantasies. DAMN YOU WOMAN!0
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Her Catwoman fantasies didn't include me
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I went back to my ex @piggysmalls333 and lived out her fantasy over and over again.0
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@gonzalesvikki you had me at MEOW
@Peter_Brady I want you to both to know I just laughed so hard tears came out0 -
I bought her a superwoman costume instead of a Catwoman one0
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He wanted me to be superwoman. Doesn't he know I'm Wonder Woman.0
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She didn't respect me when I used the "safe" word0
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Couldn't pronounce the safe word0
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Her safe word was wonder... How was I supposed to know she wasn't calling my name0
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Left me for another..but..but baby..I love you
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she was hung up on her ex0
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He always hung up on me when I called.0
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His toenails kept scratching me
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His cat, that he let on the bed WITH us, scratched me.0
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