We broke up because...

g44219

she caught cat scratch fever

Kvm11628

He wanted to grow hair and a beard like Ted Nugent

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Didn't like my matching upper and lower beards.

Kvm11628

<shudder>

Asked me to braid his beards. Just too much,

g44219

she wouldn't experiment a little

Kvm11628

His version of experimenting involved power tools.

g44219

told I wanted to experiment and she bought a chemistry set

Kvm11628

(OMG I almost posted the same thing before)

We just didn't have chemistry

DSwales11

She performed different science experiments on me

Just_J_Now

He wanted to grab me all night. Didn't let me sleep.

Kvm11628

Told me I needed more beauty sleep.

Peter_Brady

Misheard me. I said she looked beautiful when she slept.

g44219

he always slept with one eye open gripping his pillow tight

Kvm11628

(ha! JUST listened to that song)

Wouldn't take me to a Metallica concert....

g44219

she got so stoned at the concert she forgot we went

Kvm11628

What? I'm hungry. Can you pass the Cheez Doodles?

and, @csbnga - LIAR!

Kvm11628

csbnga wrote: »

Hated Alice in Chains

Sorry, had to go back to this one, @csbnga because I missed the obvious - He had some sick fantasies about the housekeeper

g44219

she wouldn't act out my housekeeper fantasy

Kvm11628

He never asked for what he wanted

g44219

the answer was always no

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Took silence for agreement. That poor mute person.

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Told me I would be the perfect partner if I got a lobotomy.

g44219

he did some pretty shocking things

piggysmalls333

I felt uncomfortable when his hairless cats kept staring at us in the bedroom

Test_Ryder

Had a feline issue

g44219

wouldn't let me sit in his "cat's" chair

Wonderwomanvik

Wouldn't let me on his lap

musclegood_fatbad

Liked to call me Santa

piggysmalls333

Wouldn't let me wear me elf costume in public

Lycan_

We couldnt reconcile our east coast-west coast drama.