We broke up because...
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He had an accent I couldn't understand0
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lol0
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She is a vampire.
(Oddly enough, did this one by typing "she" and then selecting the middle word a couple times.)0 -
He was into odd things0
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Wouldn't try anything fun0
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She wouldn't accept the safe word..0
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Wore padded panties... Totally fake tush0
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We partied all night and she passed out on the way home..0
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Kept complaining about needing to sleep0
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Didn't like me taking my afternoon naps0
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She didn't like my lame foreplay..0
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Thought talking about our dreams was foreplay0
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Couldn't understand that cuddling leads to happy fun time0
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Never any fun time
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Thought I was a prostitute
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He gave me roses... Everyone knows I like lillies
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Liked my best friend more0
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Had moobs1
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Was too much of a warrior princess for me,0
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When I suggested we get a tattoo, she thought I was referring to the character on Fantasy Island...0
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They didn't like my music0
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She don't like pizza ..0
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I love pizza... He never listens to me
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But she like pizza only with pineapple topping ..0
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Ran off with our life savings1
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