We broke up because...

slimgirljo15

He had an accent I couldn't understand

johnw83

lol

iTim__

She is a vampire.

(Oddly enough, did this one by typing "she" and then selecting the middle word a couple times.)

Abhi_131196

He was into odd things

slimgirljo15

Wouldn't try anything fun

MileHighFitness

She wouldn't accept the safe word..

LonniJay

Wore padded panties... Totally fake tush

MileHighFitness

We partied all night and she passed out on the way home..

slimgirljo15

Kept complaining about needing to sleep

LonniJay

Didn't like me taking my afternoon naps

MileHighFitness

She didn't like my lame foreplay..

LonniJay

Thought talking about our dreams was foreplay

Unknown

This content has been removed.

LonniJay

Couldn't understand that cuddling leads to happy fun time

Unknown

This content has been removed.

slimgirljo15

Never any fun time

LonniJay

Thought I was a prostitute

Unknown

This content has been removed.

LonniJay

He gave me roses... Everyone knows I like lillies

Unknown

This content has been removed.

MzIrish

Liked my best friend more

Unknown

This content has been removed.

LonniJay

Had moobs

karliexrose

Was too much of a warrior princess for me,

let_me_clip_dirty_wings

When I suggested we get a tattoo, she thought I was referring to the character on Fantasy Island...

LonniJay

They didn't like my music

faysalubit

She don't like pizza ..

LonniJay

I love pizza... He never listens to me

faysalubit

But she like pizza only with pineapple topping ..

slimgirljo15

Ran off with our life savings