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We broke up because...
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She accused me of staining my lips with other people's blood and it was only Revlon0
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She liked to be bitten, when all I wanted to do was nibble!0
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He slept in a coffin and would only come out at night0
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She wouldn't give me her urine for my random drug test0
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Kept drinking my urine like apple juice when I handed it to him in the morning0
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Weird fetishes! He was always asking me to p in a cup
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Always bragged he was Captain of the Water Polo Team!0
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He didn't want a long distance relationship0
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She was worse than a man about peeing outside the bowl0
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She never made any sense!0
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She never listens0
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He was way too into himself0
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He was a Red Sox fan.0
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He wasn't a Broncos fan!0
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They kept talking about sports0
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She wasn't a Panthers fan!0
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He always wanted me to wear lingerie.0
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He ate my lingerie0
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She wouldn't let me pull her braided hair in the bedroom.0
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Tried to get me to dress up like Pippy Longstocking0
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Always wanted me to act out her Gilligan's Island fantasy.0
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He was against role play0
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She wanted me to call her daddy.0
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He was too broke to be my Sugar Daddy
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She wanted me to use my horse show money to buy her stuff0
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