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We broke up because...
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I drank the tears0
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She kept trying to make me cry0
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she was a sore loser0
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She always wanted to wrestle.... And she never let me win. AND she always stole my bacon!0
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She liked to burn me with the bacon grease0
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He always wanted to play with food0
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She kept repeating, "asparagus is not a toy!"1
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He hid all my toys0
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She preferred her toys0
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He'd lost his sense of wonder.0
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His eyes would always wander0
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he always closed his eyes
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She kept trying to blindfold me0
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there weren't enough covers for both of us0
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She said she was undercover; I thought she meant she was a cop.0
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guys was always in trouble with the law0
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She refused to stop wearing her sheriffs badge and made me call her officer.
ETA: Or is that why we stayed together?0 -
Cuz I got scared of how much time they spent on the phone0
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She took my lipsticks on safari and didn't replace them0
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She stole my pjs0
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