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We broke up because...

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  • DawnOfTheDead_Lift
    DawnOfTheDead_Lift Posts: 753 Member
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    She said the movie Misery was how she wanted to model our relationship
  • _BlahBlah_BlackSheep_
    _BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ Posts: 2,148 Member
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    He took away my ax
  • AlistairBernardNormal
    AlistairBernardNormal Posts: 989 Member
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    She kept calling me 'dirty bird.'
  • _BlahBlah_BlackSheep_
    _BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ Posts: 2,148 Member
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    He wouldn't take a bath.
  • terrordawg
    terrordawg Posts: 19,462 Member
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    He hadn’t heard that the bird is the word
  • epr31295
    epr31295 Posts: 6,213 Member
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    She said I never listened to her well I guess she was right I never heard her say we were breaking up!
  • Bill9160
    Bill9160 Posts: 8,600 Member
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    he only wanted to listen to himself talk
  • craiglawanna0911
    craiglawanna0911 Posts: 24 Member
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    He hid behind his shades
  • AlistairBernardNormal
    AlistairBernardNormal Posts: 989 Member
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    She didn't like my sunglasses.
  • terrordawg
    terrordawg Posts: 19,462 Member
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    He had too many groupies!
  • Bill9160
    Bill9160 Posts: 8,600 Member
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    I found out she was a groupie for a country 🤮band
  • katerwedo
    katerwedo Posts: 1,250 Member
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    His breath......
  • epr31295
    epr31295 Posts: 6,213 Member
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    She insisted on kissing in the morning before brushing our teeth!
  • katerwedo
    katerwedo Posts: 1,250 Member
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    He thought we were really dating
  • epr31295
    epr31295 Posts: 6,213 Member
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    She always had her B.O.B. sleep between us!
  • katerwedo
    katerwedo Posts: 1,250 Member
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    He was seriously warped.....kept calling me Fred and wouldn't stop wearing my clothes. Had to call the looney bin and got him picked up.
  • epr31295
    epr31295 Posts: 6,213 Member
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    She kept singing these lyrics all day and night I like the song and all but her voice!

    Remember when you ran away
    And I got on my knees
    And begged you not to leave
    Because I'd go beserk
    Well you left me anyhow
    And then the days got worse and worse
    And now you see I've gone
    Completely out of my mind
    And they're coming to take me away ha-haaa
    They're coming to take me away ho-ho hee-hee ha-haaa
    To the funny farm
    Where life is beautiful all the time
    And I'll be happy to see those nice young men
    In their clean white coats
    And they're coming to take me away ha-haaa
    You thought it was a joke
    And so you laughed
    You laughed when I said
    That losing you would make me flip my lid
    Right?
    You know you laughed
    I heard you laugh, you laughed
    You laughed and laughed and then you left
    But now you know I'm utterly mad
    And they're coming to take me away ha-haaa
    They're coming to take me away ho-ho hee-hee ha-haaa
    To the happy home with trees and flowers and chirping birds
    And basket weavers who sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes
    And they're coming to take me away ha-haaa
    I cooked your food
    I cleaned your house
    And this is how you pay me back
    For all my kind unselfish, loving deeds
    Ha! Well you just wait
    They'll find you yet and when they do
    They'll put you in the A.S.P.C.A.
    You mangy mutt
    And they're coming to take me away ha-haaa
    They're coming to take me away ha-haaa ho-ho hee-hee
    To the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time
    And I'll be happy to see those nice young men
    In their clean white coats
    And they're coming to take me away
    To the happy home with trees and flowers and chirping birds
    And basket weavers who sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes
    And they're coming to take me away ha-haaa!
  • Bill9160
    Bill9160 Posts: 8,600 Member
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    he was trying to be the next Dr Demento
  • _BlahBlah_BlackSheep_
    _BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ Posts: 2,148 Member
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    He kept calling me by the wrong name
  • THS2HASPASSED
    THS2HASPASSED Posts: 1,055 Member
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    she called me a bad name

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