We broke up because...
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Got mad because I told her not to wear the purple Tutu to my Boss' Funeral0
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Told you that the form of polygamy you were into was illegal... Refused to listen.0
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Hit on my grandpa0
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Kept showing off his wristband0
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Stared off into space!0
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Noooooo never...im never breaking up with you
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She had an issue with my collection of taxidermy squirrels.0
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Slept next to her taxidermy squirrels0
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He was freaked out by squirrels0
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was obsessed with squirrels0
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He hated animals0
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Wouldnt let me have a squirrel...even when I wrapped it in bacon
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Every time we went for a run he would get distracted say "Squirrel" and run off in the other direction!0
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Was always running away from me0
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cause you never showed me your face.0
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Wouldn't share his Heath Bar!0
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she lived in the past, i couldn't time travel.0
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His arms were restricted in 39 states.0
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She didn't like my cooking0
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she didn't cook bacon for me0
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Only cooked hot dogs0
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She did all the cooking and left all the dish washing to me0
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She cooked too much comfort food! Loved and hated what it did to my figure!0
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super conscious about her figure0
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Always checking out other chicks0
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she was too possessive0
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Wouldnt let me keep chickens and I love fresh eggs!0
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she didn't like bacon, only wanted eggs0
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He ate all the bacon0
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she went far far away0
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