Partners who get jealous over weightloss...?

TinaFey27

yes my hubby is not jealous but a bit insecure lol he keeps telling me stop losing weight and trying to make every excuse for me not to go workout! but i still go because i know his motives

challenger9509

Foe those who's spouses are jealous, do you not take it as an insult? He is basically saying as you are you are he can hold on to you but God forbid you lose weight then everybody and their brother will want a piece.

Sounds insulting to me.


My husband is happy and supportive of my weight loss and is enjoying it... a lot.

I support every oz of weight my wife loses. But it would be pretty naïve to think that a man or woman shouldn't develop some "insecurity" when the person that means the most to them may start getting approached by people they "normally" wouldn't be approached by....even the strongest of relationships develop insecurity at times. This is why it is important to talk about it and reinforce to each other the love you have for one another.

My wife is way more insecure about my working out/losing weight, than I ever could be of hers. I just try to let her know that she is still the star in my sky, and I'm not hunting for other solar systems.

This is great! Well said

SteelySunshine

Not anymore. I think it's because of the serious problems I have developed over getting too heavy. So, now my health is more important than any insecurities. Plus, I didn't say anything about losing weight for 6 mos and it wasn't noticed. So, now it's like oh yeah you do look a bit smaller.

WalkingMermaid_

I'm single so don't or won't have this problem. But if I did, I wouldn't put up with it for a second. All that hard work and effort that goes into losing weight and then you're expected to deal with someone else projecting their insecurities onto you? No way!

xvxCelticWandererxvx

If he is, he's never said anything. I've finally found what works for me for the long term, lost over 40# and kept it off over the winter when I really didn't work out. Now that I'm back into the fitness part of it again, he's shown more interest in his overall health and lost a lot of weight recently. He's nearly 70# down! We'd never known each other at our current weights before!

LMT2012

It's like when two alcholics are married and one quits and goes to AA. No one likes to lose their eating buddy and it can be a deal-breaker in some relationships. If the jealous person was never heavy, and is just jealous of the attention their partner is now getting that is sick too. Who wants someone they love to be unhealthy just so they can feel secure? Sick.

xxghost

My boyfriend can eat anything and still only weighs 130 pounds. Its incredible. I'm definitely jealous, though I don't get weird about it or anything. Just wish I could do that! I tease him all the time that it will catch up with him though.

ireloyd

Nope just motivates me to do the same =]

BrittanyMegan88

My boyfriend is very supportive of it. He even bought me some weights for working out. He also goes to the gym now, even though he doesn't need to lose any weight at all. He just goes to build muscle. We're both eating healthier together now too. It's super fun & i feel so lucky to have someone who's as interested in being fit and healthy as I am. ^-^

shariwjennings

My husband would encourage me and tell me I looked good and all that- but then complain that I was at the gym 2 or 3 nights a week, and then say but I am not complaining that you are gone.........It was an insecurity thing I am sure- and got me to feeling as if I needed to be home with him when he was home- I haven't been tot the gym in months

tmm_0127

My ex would try working out when he was seeing the results I was getting and would get jealous mostly because I have the time to do it and he didn't (worked 40+ hours a week and went to night school 4 days out the week - could have gone to the gym during lunch and on his days off but didn't) and he'd have his ways of encouraging me, but he also liked rubbing my belly saying it was for good luck and pinching my chubby cheeks even though I told him it made me feel awful and to stop ... never did.

Amadbro

My fiance was with me when I was my heaviest at 221lbs 30%+ bodyfat and when I cut to 160 12% you could tell she was very jealous. She'd make all kinds of snarky comments when we'd go to the beach like "oh I bet your just so proud having all these girls look at you"..stuff like that. We sat down and had a serious chat and I think she understands that I don't do it for anyone but me.

sugarkissprincess

Yes, my husband hates the attention I get. Constantly asking me if I'm going to leave him if I find someone better...

ripzone13

My EX husband liked to keep me fat. He was very fit, which makes this even stranger. I didn't realize at the time, but he was always keeping me away from the gym,cooking really unhealthy food, and would scoff at me at the mention of me losing weight. He was very very controlling, and I think he thought if I stayed overweight I wouldn't think I could do better than him. Wrong!
My now boyfriend asks me what I "can" and "cannot" eat, he loves to cook, and cooks everything lean and healthy for me. He even watches my little girl on the weekends so I can get to the gym! That is what I call supportive, and I am thankful for it each day.

dlionsmane

Nope, I've gained all of my weight in the first four years that we have been together. So I am getting back to where I was when we first started dating (and then some). The good part is that since I do all the cooking he is eating better and he is happy about it because he has also lost some weight and his cholesterol is in check! So we both win, plus we like to walk and hike and it's so much easier when you are a healthy weight!

seltzermint555

My husband was pushing 400 lb in high school and lost nearly 200 lb during his 20's (has kept it off long term). He is a big guy, 6'2" and 225ish right now and he's very fit (flat stomach, great legs and arms, the works). But I think he is quite fascinated by MFP, even though he does not use it. He's expressed shock that I have actually lost 1.58 lb per week on average...I think it's the accuracy of MFP that fascinates him and secretly I think he wants to use the site too but for some reason he won't.

The only time he's ever actually seemed "jealous" is when we both ate a lot of road food and pastries and junk on our wedding trip and I gained 1 lb and he gained around 8 lb.

I still have quite a lot to lose, although I'll probably stop around 180 lb. He is happy for me regardless and only jokingly makes comments about "don't lose your bum/hips" but there's no danger of that. I have my mother's bum/hips and even at 120 lb she looked like Kim Kardashian so it's all good.

DrMAvDPhD

Jealous that you are able to lose the weight and jealous of attention that you are getting are separate things.

Neither my husband nor I are jealous about outside attention. We both find it flattering and trust each other to not stray so it's a complete non-issue.

Now I think when we were first starting out, I dropped weight much faster than my husband and he was jealous of my better metabolism. Now that we've been at it for well over a year, I am quite jealous of his ability to pack on muscle (relatively) easily while as a woman I have to really wait for big results. This type of jealousy just serves as motivation :-)

allisonsdaddy

I haven't found there to be any jealousy between the two of us. In fact, when one of us "falls off the wagon" it is motivating to see the other's progress and is an encouragement to keep on.
And she has nothing to be jealous about anyway...she knows I'll love her until all the days stop.

SugarBaby71

I think it has less to do with you losing weight and suddenly everybody wanting you, and more with you losing weight and becoming more confident and happy with your body and some people ( not only your partners) can become jealous of that.

This.

CaraRahl

my fiance started off by encouraging my fitness journey, and now he's starting one of his own so we get to encourage each other