Is he REALLY off limits?

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fara180
fara180 Posts: 1,260 Member
in Chit-Chat
I'm in a predicament! A very cute guy messaged me on a dating account of mine and we started to chat. His name came up (very unusual name) and it rung a bell, a slightly alarming bell!

This guy, let's call him Paul*, used to "talk," to my best friend (over a year ago). They met online and mostly communicated via Snap-Chat and email. They never met in person. I remember that she used to complain that he always blew her off when she tried to make plans and she still brings him up, though it's rare. She usually says something along the lines of "I wonder what happened to him. I just want to know why he never wanted to meet me."

He's asked me out to get a drink, but I don't know if this would break girl-code, seeing as my friend used to be wrapped up in him...though they never met.

I usually wouldn't even think about meeting up with a guy my friend used to like...except they never even MET before...so is he really off limits? Honest input is appreciated!
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Replies

  • Oops_Myhaloslipped
    Oops_Myhaloslipped Posts: 3,892 Member
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    Yes,and if he wouldn't meet your friend in person that's a major red flag. Not to mention your girl code you'd be breaking. How would you feel if she did the same thing? If you even have to question the integrity of it then I think you already know the answer.
  • GoldieGlocks
    GoldieGlocks Posts: 54 Member
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    I don't think your in the wrong, but it's probably not worth jeopardizing your friends trust/friendship over a guy you have never met. Either way let us know how it goes! [:
  • fara180
    fara180 Posts: 1,260 Member
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    Should I even bring it up to her, or pretend it never happened?
  • Oops_Myhaloslipped
    Oops_Myhaloslipped Posts: 3,892 Member
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    I wouldn't even say anything,it might hurt her feelings that he was willing to meet you but not her. It would hurt mine :/
  • GoldieGlocks
    GoldieGlocks Posts: 54 Member
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    Hopefully he's not stupid enough to bring up the whole situation in a convo with her :/
  • fara180
    fara180 Posts: 1,260 Member
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    el3ctricskittl3z wrote: »
    Hopefully he's not stupid enough to bring up the whole situation in a convo with her :/

    They haven't talked in over a year so I doubt it would come up
  • joshua3179
    joshua3179 Posts: 2,882 Member
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    Just want to say.. You're a beautiful young woman and I'd never think you needed a dating website to meet someone you have beautiful eyes and amazing skin.. Very pretty :wink:
  • jennifershoo
    jennifershoo Posts: 3,198 Member
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    You should call Catfish, the TV show. That could be interesting ;)
  • msh0612
    msh0612 Posts: 354 Member
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    I wouldnt meet up with him and I wouldnt say anything. Just walk away from the whole thing. There are plenty of other men out there. :)
  • Canwehugnow
    Canwehugnow Posts: 218 Member
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    He's off limits, just because she keeps brings it up sometimes.
  • qdoyle11
    qdoyle11 Posts: 325 Member
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    He sounds sketchy. It's been a year, and since he and your friend didn't meet, I don't see it being a problem there, but maybe suggest you meet somewhere you feel comfortable and see what happens. If he's a no-show, no loss.
  • Burt_Huttz
    Burt_Huttz Posts: 1,612 Member
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    fara180 wrote: »
    Should I even bring it up to her, or pretend it never happened?

    This whole scenario sounds extremely suspicious; retain your friendship, don't bring it up, and don't waste the time to find out exactly why he is a flake. You already know he is a flake. Do you really want to go spelunking in his weirdo issues cavern?

  • blueeyesgrace
    blueeyesgrace Posts: 407 Member
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    Yea, I wouldn't even think twice about giving him the big 'ol **** NO. If your friend means that much to you... I'm not sure if I would talk to her about it or not. She could be mad if she finds out that you didn't tell her, and she could be mad that he is talking to you now and not her. Feel that one out based on how you think she would react. Either way, I say tell him to go find someone else to talk to.

    I'm on a dating site, too, and it's weird the people that sometimes contact you on there. I've had some really good experiences, but I'm super super picky about who I meet in person or give my number to.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    Ho's before Bro's.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    Ovaries before brovaries.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    Sisters before misters.
  • blueeyesgrace
    blueeyesgrace Posts: 407 Member
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    ^^ I wish there was a "like" button...
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    Biscuit before brisket
  • mrsmartinez99
    mrsmartinez99 Posts: 1,255 Member
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    ^THIS :smiley:
  • Mswack78
    Mswack78 Posts: 611 Member
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    if she's a good friend I wouldn't...if she's not I'd go...

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