Am i over reacting?

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lady_in_weighting
lady_in_weighting Posts: 196 Member
in Chit-Chat
Back in July last year, a mutual friend of both my boyfriends and I, asked him to sleep with her. This was obviously behind my back and I didnt find out about this till december last year. I was really upset and hurt that she would ask such a thing knowing that my boyfriend and I had been together for a year and a half at that point. He tells me he rejected her and I do believe that.

However, the months following her asking to sleep with him in July they both had private text conversations and would sent twitter jokes to each other. When we were out she would be flirtacious with my boyfriend. I knew that she fancied him but I had to brush it off.

When I confronted my boyfriend about her asking to sleep with him he told me he said 'no' to her and that I can trust him. I find it hard to trust him because she wouldnt just ask something like that out of the blue without him encouraging it. They werent even drunk. Im upset that he continued to have all this 'banter' back and forth with her after the advances she made.

He agreed to stop speaking to her after christmas but I rcently found out that she invited him out for drinks now she has slip with her boyfriend and he has added her as a friend on snapchat (for those who dont know what snapchat is, its where you send instant pictures messages back an forth to one another)

I feel he has betrayed my trust by speaking to her again.

What are your thoughts and recommendations about what I should do?
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Replies

  • _noob_
    _noob_ Posts: 3,306 Member
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    JBU
  • PaleoChocolateBear
    PaleoChocolateBear Posts: 2,844 Member
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    I think you know the answer already you're just wanting people to confirm what you already believe, and that is to break up with him
  • taycheese
    taycheese Posts: 87 Member
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    Break up with him.
  • wanderlustlover
    wanderlustlover Posts: 84 Member
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    Definitely time to go your separate ways.
  • mlcantwell
    mlcantwell Posts: 243 Member
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    He had time to rebuild the trust and stop talking to her, and he didn't. Doesn't mean he cheated on you, but he can't be trusted, I would dump him.
  • lheaton
    lheaton Posts: 51 Member
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    You can't trust him. A trustworthy boyfriend would have told you the minute she asked him and he would not have been in contact with her again. Kick him to the curb and find a real man!
  • niftyafterfifty
    niftyafterfifty Posts: 338 Member
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    I'm sorry, but I don't think you're overreacting.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,669 Member
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    Not the end of the world. Break up and go out and explore more.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • 5ftnFun
    5ftnFun Posts: 948 Member
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    I feel he has betrayed my trust by speaking to her again.

    He betrayed your trust. Time to move on.
  • healthyandfitgirl14
    healthyandfitgirl14 Posts: 413 Member
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    ask one of his friends if you can sleep with him, then do it.


    or you could just dump him...
  • 4_Lisa
    4_Lisa Posts: 362 Member
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    He may not have physically cheated, but there is also emotional cheating. If he hasn't made the steps to make you feel comfortable, then you need to move on. And clearly she wasn't a 'mutal' friend, or she wouldn't have asked him in the first place.
  • sawiemken
    sawiemken Posts: 39 Member
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    ditch them both!!!!
  • 4_Lisa
    4_Lisa Posts: 362 Member
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    I feel he has betrayed my trust by speaking to her again.

    He betrayed your trust. Time to move on.

    People betray trust all the time, the fact that he did it twice is your red flag...
  • kimmie185
    kimmie185 Posts: 550 Member
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    You're not over reacting.
    He's a cruddy boyfriend and she's a cruddy friend. I would let him go so your "friend" and "ex-boyfriend" can be cruddy together and you can find someone much better.
  • Sublimely_Self_Righteous
    Sublimely_Self_Righteous Posts: 429
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    Dump him and then proposition her boyfriend for sex. But of course, don't do him if he says ,"Okay!".
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
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    This sounds like "White Trash Jerry Springer"
  • homerjspartan
    homerjspartan Posts: 1,893 Member
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    Definitely time to go your separate ways.

    One day love will find you
    Break those chains that bind you
    One night will remind you
  • PantalaNagaPampa
    PantalaNagaPampa Posts: 1,031 Member
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    ask one of his friends if you can sleep with him, then do it.


    or you could just dump him...
    Let me make firends with him first, then take option 1.
  • Lynds7128
    Lynds7128 Posts: 132
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    1844089035_photobucket_208129_.jpg
  • marieautumn
    marieautumn Posts: 932 Member
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    Break up then thank God you don't have children or any other reason to ever have to speak to him again.

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