Bikini first time in public... Should I?
Replies
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go for it!
your ink is amazing and should be shown off 0 -
Wear a bikini? Yes, absolutely.
This bikini? Not sure it is a good fit/style for you. The bottoms are fine, but you need a bigger cup size or a different fitting top. This top could get uncomfortable pretty quickly. It might just be the way you're holding the camera up, but you're pinching yourself a little. A halter style will provide good support and be more flattering on your frame.
Beautiful tattoo! You should show it off, definitely.
This.
I hope you don't take any offense to what I'm about to say. I'm basing this off of my own experience:
I just had my first public experience with a bikini, but I made 100% sure I had the right bikini for my body and that it fit properly. The proper fit is key. I'm going to agree with this poster that you need to try a larger cup size, but I think you might need to look for another type of bottom as well. Personally, I've learned that string bikinis don't work well for my body shape. Mostly because my hips eat the strings and I end up with muffin-top, which seems to be what your hips are trying to do to the bottoms you're wearing. Just because you like a type of bikini doesn't mean it was made for you; this was a hard pill for me to swallow as far a bikinis are concerned. :ohwell: Take your most brutally honest friend with you to while bikini shopping. They should help guide you in the right direction.
(Edited to add the above paragraph.)0 -
go for it. No one cares as much as we think they do.
What she said! Go for it and soak up some sun!!0 -
this has always been a hard thing for me as well. i feel like everyone is/was always pointing and laughing or mumbling crap about me so i always wore a tankini and even then felt paranoid/self conscious. however, this past weekend, i wore a bikini and tested out my "F yall, im wearing it" attitude and rocked it so freeing. and yes i have lots more to lose but i felt like it was a huge accomplishment for me!
go for it!0 -
I say wear it and rock it. I live AT the beach and you are completely normal.
I wish everyone to get to a point in their life that they just don't care what others think.
People are ALWAYS going to judge you by something. Whether it be your weight, your face,
what you are wearing, a tattoo......a zit......... the patch of skin on your elbow............
They will find something! It makes people feel better about themselves.0 -
If you feel confident and are ready then DO IT! It isn't about waiting until you reach your goal, it is about celebrating the journey. 0
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this has always been a hard thing for me as well. i feel like everyone is/was always pointing and laughing or mumbling crap about me so i always wore a tankini and even then felt paranoid/self conscious. however, this past weekend, i wore a bikini and tested out my "F yall, im wearing it" attitude and rocked it so freeing. and yes i have lots more to lose but i felt like it was a huge accomplishment for me!
go for it!
awesome!!!! Everyone should have that attitude every day!0 -
Your art work definitely needs to be seen. I'd love to get a tattoo some day. That being said, a different style of bikini - the tankini would be a good choice - would show all your hard work off to better advantage. The top on that bikini is too small for you. The girls are being abused to the point they're oozing out of the cups. You've got side boob and underboob going on there. If not a tankini, can you get the proper size top to match that bikini bottom? 0
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Yes, but a different bikini. That one doesn't fit well. Have a brilliant holiday!0
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go for it. No one cares as much as we think they do.
THIS!
Go, wear it and enjoy yourself!0 -
You need 75% bare skin to soak in the natural Vitamin D.
(Vitamin D is also one of those vitamins that can hinder weight loss if you are deficient)0 -
I say yes for bikini.. however this one is a no. I don't think you're string bikini ready and the top isn't quite there yet either.. mini shopping spree!!!!0
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GO FOR IT!! You look great! And your tattoo is freakin amazing!! You are your own worst critic, just remember that! I think you look wonderful!0
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I say go for it..0
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My theory is that there is always going to be someone else that looks worse then you. When you get to the beach find that person and then rock the confidence that you get from it!!!
(I know kind of mean, but it works!)0 -
Wear it & rock it. There are those that will be thinner than you, and those larger than you wishing they had your confidence to wear a bikini. Plus your tatts need to be seen. Slap some sunscreen on your tatts, and hit the beach in that bikini.0
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I would find a more flattering style. Congrats on losing weight, but this bikini does not fit you well. You can see under boob because the top is too small. The bottoms are cutting into your hips.
Try on different styles. The number on the tag doesn't mean anything. If you have to go up a size to find something that flatters your body then go for it. It's just a number.0 -
I can't see the pictures because my work computer is blocking them... but was in your situation a couple weeks ago on my honeymoon (5' tall and 145 lbs, but dangit, I'm wearing a bikini on my honeymoon even if it kills me!)...
So here's my advice: go for it, nobody cares as much as you do, and PEOPLE WATCH while you're there. This is how I reassured myself: keep an eye out for people in bikinis who are bigger than you, but are wearing them anyway. There are lots of these people around. I promise.
It shouldn't be a judgemental thing... not, "UGH that person should NOT be in a bikini!" but more of an objective thing to help you frame and analyze the social norms that tell us who gets to wear which bathing suits... think about this for a few minutes, and it will start to feel really absurd and its power over you will decrease.
Also, when you see someone larger than you rocking a bikini, ask yourself: "As an onlooker, am I feeling any of the things I'm afraid others feel when they look at me in a bikini? Or am I just sort of ambivalent? Am I concerned and embarassed FOR this person because I'm afraid others are judging her even though I'm not? Does she look like she cares? Why should I be embarassed for her if she's not embarassed herself? What is there even to be embarassed about?"
Etc etc
not judgemental but make sure you people watch to find other women who are larger than you are in bikinis?
hmm....
Did I say "looks worse"? No. I said "larger". I was very careful to use neutral language. "Larger than you but in a bikini" is what will help OP deal with the pressure she's feeling, which comes from a social norm that's frankly ridiculous. I've seen women twice my size in bikinis that honestly probably looked better in them than I looked in mine, but it was helpful for my self-image to take that critique and apply it to the things I know about myself, to help me get past the blinders we so often have for ourselves. I can't see in a mirror what others see when they look at me, but when *I* am the *other* looking at someone else, I can get a better picture of how much others probably care about my pudge (which is somewhere near zero, unless they're also super self-consious and doing the same thing).
I'm not advocating the "at least I look better than HER" mindset. To claw your way over others in an attractiveness race is counterproductive and just reinforces the negative stigma I'm trying to erase from my own mind, even if I can't erase it from everyone else's.
What I'm advocating is stopping to mindfully consider what's going on around you. Really take a moment and analyze how much you care about what everyone else is wearing (you probably don't care at all), then you can safely assume that everyone else cares what YOU'RE wearing to approximately the same degree.
ETA: It's a mental exercise to PROVE to yourself that nobody cares as much as you think they do... because it's easy to say that, but it can be hard to really take it to heart without something in your mind saying, "They just told me that to make me feel better."0 -
I've always been of the opinion that people should wear whatever they want and not fear what others think. No one ever pleases everyone in their choice of clothing. Hell, I get bagged on all the time by friends and family because all I practically wear anywhere (with the exception of being appropriate at events) is gym wear. Shorts, dri fit t shirts, sweats, etc. are me and I don't give a **** about whether people like it or not.
A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
I agree that you need to find a better fitting bikini. This one is too small and not very flattering. Properly fitting cloths automatically make everyone look better.
I don't buy into the "compare your self to someone else to make you feel better." I advocate true self confidence and true comfort in your own skin, this can only be accomplished when you lay down the insecurities that make you judge yourself (and thereby other people). Our own self perceptions are incorrect anyway, so hanging on to this comparative is not self serving, and can actually be detrimental to our ability to love ourselves for who we are.0 -
wear a bikini in public? yes. go for it.
but wear one that fits properly. get one that is for your shape. it looks like the top of it is to tight and you have boob sticking out under it. and in my opinion, the string bikini's bottoms don't compliment a curvier woman.
this0 -
I can't see the pictures because my work computer is blocking them... but was in your situation a couple weeks ago on my honeymoon (5' tall and 145 lbs, but dangit, I'm wearing a bikini on my honeymoon even if it kills me!)...
So here's my advice: go for it, nobody cares as much as you do, and PEOPLE WATCH while you're there. This is how I reassured myself: keep an eye out for people in bikinis who are bigger than you, but are wearing them anyway. There are lots of these people around. I promise.
It shouldn't be a judgemental thing... not, "UGH that person should NOT be in a bikini!" but more of an objective thing to help you frame and analyze the social norms that tell us who gets to wear which bathing suits... think about this for a few minutes, and it will start to feel really absurd and its power over you will decrease.
Also, when you see someone larger than you rocking a bikini, ask yourself: "As an onlooker, am I feeling any of the things I'm afraid others feel when they look at me in a bikini? Or am I just sort of ambivalent? Am I concerned and embarassed FOR this person because I'm afraid others are judging her even though I'm not? Does she look like she cares? Why should I be embarassed for her if she's not embarassed herself? What is there even to be embarassed about?"
Etc etc
not judgemental but make sure you people watch to find other women who are larger than you are in bikinis?
hmm....
Did I say "looks worse"? No. I said "larger". I was very careful to use neutral language. "Larger than you but in a bikini" is what will help OP deal with the pressure she's feeling, which comes from a social norm that's frankly ridiculous. I've seen women twice my size in bikinis that honestly probably looked better in them than I looked in mine, but it was helpful for my self-image to take that critique and apply it to the things I know about myself, to help me get past the blinders we so often have for ourselves. I can't see in a mirror what others see when they look at me, but when *I* am the *other* looking at someone else, I can get a better picture of how much others probably care about my pudge (which is somewhere near zero, unless they're also super self-consious and doing the same thing).
I'm not advocating the "at least I look better than HER" mindset. To claw your way over others in an attractiveness race is counterproductive and just reinforces the negative stigma I'm trying to erase from my own mind, even if I can't erase it from everyone else's.
What I'm advocating is stopping to mindfully consider what's going on around you. Really take a moment and analyze how much you care about what everyone else is wearing (you probably don't care at all), then you can safely assume that everyone else cares what YOU'RE wearing to approximately the same degree.
ETA: It's a mental exercise to PROVE to yourself that nobody cares as much as you think they do... because it's easy to say that, but it can be hard to really take it to heart without something in your mind saying, "They just told me that to make me feel better."
I didn't even bother to read all this.
No matter how "tactfully" you choose to phrase it, the sentiment is the same.
Use whatever euphemisms you like, but essentially you are echoing the main reason women are nasty to other women.
no one's self confidence should ever be based on how other people look. Or how you look with respects to them.
and frankly, if you were confident in yourself, or even confident in your own self-worth that you did not care what others thought, this comparison BS wouldn't even occur to you (and I use "you" to refer to most human beings, not YOU specifically).0 -
I can't see the pictures because my work computer is blocking them... but was in your situation a couple weeks ago on my honeymoon (5' tall and 145 lbs, but dangit, I'm wearing a bikini on my honeymoon even if it kills me!)...
So here's my advice: go for it, nobody cares as much as you do, and PEOPLE WATCH while you're there. This is how I reassured myself: keep an eye out for people in bikinis who are bigger than you, but are wearing them anyway. There are lots of these people around. I promise.
It shouldn't be a judgemental thing... not, "UGH that person should NOT be in a bikini!" but more of an objective thing to help you frame and analyze the social norms that tell us who gets to wear which bathing suits... think about this for a few minutes, and it will start to feel really absurd and its power over you will decrease.
Also, when you see someone larger than you rocking a bikini, ask yourself: "As an onlooker, am I feeling any of the things I'm afraid others feel when they look at me in a bikini? Or am I just sort of ambivalent? Am I concerned and embarassed FOR this person because I'm afraid others are judging her even though I'm not? Does she look like she cares? Why should I be embarassed for her if she's not embarassed herself? What is there even to be embarassed about?"
Etc etc
not judgemental but make sure you people watch to find other women who are larger than you are in bikinis?
hmm....
Did I say "looks worse"? No. I said "larger". I was very careful to use neutral language. "Larger than you but in a bikini" is what will help OP deal with the pressure she's feeling, which comes from a social norm that's frankly ridiculous. I've seen women twice my size in bikinis that honestly probably looked better in them than I looked in mine, but it was helpful for my self-image to take that critique and apply it to the things I know about myself, to help me get past the blinders we so often have for ourselves. I can't see in a mirror what others see when they look at me, but when *I* am the *other* looking at someone else, I can get a better picture of how much others probably care about my pudge (which is somewhere near zero, unless they're also super self-consious and doing the same thing).
I'm not advocating the "at least I look better than HER" mindset. To claw your way over others in an attractiveness race is counterproductive and just reinforces the negative stigma I'm trying to erase from my own mind, even if I can't erase it from everyone else's.
What I'm advocating is stopping to mindfully consider what's going on around you. Really take a moment and analyze how much you care about what everyone else is wearing (you probably don't care at all), then you can safely assume that everyone else cares what YOU'RE wearing to approximately the same degree.
ETA: It's a mental exercise to PROVE to yourself that nobody cares as much as you think they do... because it's easy to say that, but it can be hard to really take it to heart without something in your mind saying, "They just told me that to make me feel better."
I didn't even bother to read all this.
No matter how "tactfully" you choose to phrase it, the sentiment is the same.
Use whatever euphemisms you like, but essentially you are echoing the main reason women are nasty to other women.
no one's self confidence should ever be based on how other people look. Or how you look with respects to them.
and frankly, if you were confident in yourself, or even confident in your own self-worth that you did not care what others thought, this comparison BS wouldn't even occur to you (and I use "you" to refer to most human beings, not YOU specifically).
You should have read it all because that's exactly what the OP was trying to say. If you had bother to read the whole thing instead of jumping to judgement you would have seen that.
ETA that I agree with others before me, you look amazing and should absolutely rock a bikini, just maybe one that fits better on top. Hope you have a blast! :flowerforyou:0 -
You rock it honey!
I hope that by next summer I have the confidence for a bikini as well!0 -
Wear a bikini, sure, but get one that fits. The top does not fit properly.0
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I can't see the pictures because my work computer is blocking them... but was in your situation a couple weeks ago on my honeymoon (5' tall and 145 lbs, but dangit, I'm wearing a bikini on my honeymoon even if it kills me!)...
So here's my advice: go for it, nobody cares as much as you do, and PEOPLE WATCH while you're there. This is how I reassured myself: keep an eye out for people in bikinis who are bigger than you, but are wearing them anyway. There are lots of these people around. I promise.
It shouldn't be a judgemental thing... not, "UGH that person should NOT be in a bikini!" but more of an objective thing to help you frame and analyze the social norms that tell us who gets to wear which bathing suits... think about this for a few minutes, and it will start to feel really absurd and its power over you will decrease.
Also, when you see someone larger than you rocking a bikini, ask yourself: "As an onlooker, am I feeling any of the things I'm afraid others feel when they look at me in a bikini? Or am I just sort of ambivalent? Am I concerned and embarassed FOR this person because I'm afraid others are judging her even though I'm not? Does she look like she cares? Why should I be embarassed for her if she's not embarassed herself? What is there even to be embarassed about?"
Etc etc
not judgemental but make sure you people watch to find other women who are larger than you are in bikinis?
hmm....
Did I say "looks worse"? No. I said "larger". I was very careful to use neutral language. "Larger than you but in a bikini" is what will help OP deal with the pressure she's feeling, which comes from a social norm that's frankly ridiculous. I've seen women twice my size in bikinis that honestly probably looked better in them than I looked in mine, but it was helpful for my self-image to take that critique and apply it to the things I know about myself, to help me get past the blinders we so often have for ourselves. I can't see in a mirror what others see when they look at me, but when *I* am the *other* looking at someone else, I can get a better picture of how much others probably care about my pudge (which is somewhere near zero, unless they're also super self-consious and doing the same thing).
I'm not advocating the "at least I look better than HER" mindset. To claw your way over others in an attractiveness race is counterproductive and just reinforces the negative stigma I'm trying to erase from my own mind, even if I can't erase it from everyone else's.
What I'm advocating is stopping to mindfully consider what's going on around you. Really take a moment and analyze how much you care about what everyone else is wearing (you probably don't care at all), then you can safely assume that everyone else cares what YOU'RE wearing to approximately the same degree.
ETA: It's a mental exercise to PROVE to yourself that nobody cares as much as you think they do... because it's easy to say that, but it can be hard to really take it to heart without something in your mind saying, "They just told me that to make me feel better."
I didn't even bother to read all this.
No matter how "tactfully" you choose to phrase it, the sentiment is the same.
Use whatever euphemisms you like, but essentially you are echoing the main reason women are nasty to other women.
no one's self confidence should ever be based on how other people look. Or how you look with respects to them.
and frankly, if you were confident in yourself, or even confident in your own self-worth that you did not care what others thought, this comparison BS wouldn't even occur to you (and I use "you" to refer to most human beings, not YOU specifically).
You should have read it all because that's exactly what the OP was trying to say. If you had bother to read the whole thing instead of jumping to judgement you would have seen that.
ETA that I agree with others before me, you look amazing and should absolutely rock a bikini, just maybe one that fits better on top. Hope you have a blast! :flowerforyou:
she IS advocating it, even as she says she isn't.
so are you.0 -
this - you got a little underboob going on. not a bad thing.. wish i had some. just saying! rock out.Wear a bikini? Yes, absolutely.
This bikini? Not sure it is a good fit/style for you. The bottoms are fine, but you need a bigger cup size or a different fitting top. This top could get uncomfortable pretty quickly. It might just be the way you're holding the camera up, but you're pinching yourself a little. A halter style will provide good support and be more flattering on your frame.
Beautiful tattoo! You should show it off, definitely. 0 -
You can wear a bikini fine but I am not a fan of this one.does not fit you at all. The bottoms are too small and I actually think ones with more coverage would make you look thinner. You are oozing out under the top. We can see your underboob0
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if it were me, I would not. Or maybe a different style........0
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There are some rockin' bikini options here, made for curvier people:
http://www.pinupgirlclothing.com/swimwear.html0
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